Unusual Cravings, Uneventful Weeks, Unprepared Girl
Unusual Cravings
"Want to do me a favor Jace?" I ask, in my nicest tone of voice, knowing he's under no obligation to cave in to my barrage of ridiculous requests but the poor guy usually does anyway (My parents must pay well.).
"Anything." He replies, which is par for the course.
"I want to make sundaes, could you please pick up the ingredients?" I ask politely.
"Sure, just write down what you want me to get." He smiles.
"Okay, thanks!" I say and begin writing my list.
Necessary Items:
- French Vanilla Ice Cream (must be the plain white kind NOT the yellow kind and NOT vanilla bean, please?)
- Powdered cheese (Like the stuff that comes in mac and cheese boxes, I'm sure you can buy it separately)
- Dill pickles (NOT the garlic kind, and Not the little ones, I want the big long skinny ones that taste like Dill)
- Butter Toffee peanuts (A big container cuz these are also for munching, not just for the sundaes)
- Chocolate fudge sauce (NOT the generic kind I want the premium one that's thick and goopy please)
- Maraschino cherries (With the stems please, a cherry without a stem is a crime against humanity)
- And lots and lots and lots of aerosol whip cream (I plan to use this on my coffee and on pie as well)
I hand him the list with a grin "There, I think that should just about do it. Oh crap! I also need K Cups, please, so write those down, but you can surprise me with the flavors for those, I'm not picky." He finishes reading the list and his eyes nearly pop out of his head at the abnormality of some of my ingredients. He shakes his head and writes down the K Cups.
"You're lucky I'm getting paid for this." He laughs and grabs his car keys. "I'll have my cell phone on me, so if you think of anything else you need, call me please. I'd rather not have to make two trips tonight like I did the last time." He smirks.
"Hey! You said the second time you went through the till the girl was a hottie! Remember, you even thanked me for being forgetful and making you go back! Where's the love now Jace?" I huff, exaggerating my reaction for effect.
"Ugh, pregnant women are so needy!" He laughs under his breath, as he grabs his coat and heads out the door.
"I heard that!" I call after him. Once he's gone, I make my way to the computer, thinking I'll contact Jonathan since it's been a while since I've talked to him.
I make sure to angle my webcam so that it only shows down to my shoulders. My breasts have been slightly more full and I'm also starting to show, so unfortunately Jon can't see the rest of my body anymore. He asked me once if he could see more of me and I just told him the webcam freaks me out but that I would have phone sex, without using the camera and that seems to pacify him. Pretty soon, I have his sexy face looking at me and he looks so happy to see me.
"I love you, Sweetheart! I miss you like crazy!" He grins.
"I love you Jonathan. I miss you too! How are things back home?" I ask.
"Pretty great except for that I'm missing you of course. I know what the Rents plan on getting me for my birthday coming up. It's a sea kayaking day trip, so I'm pretty excited about that." He smiles.
"Oooh, that sounds awesome! I'm going to be mailing you your present and I might send it early, just to be sure you have it in time. So, if it comes before your b-day, you have to wait to open it, alright?" I say mischievously, knowing that the wait will drive him absolutely crazy.
"No fair! I think I should be able to open it as soon as it gets here. I already have to wait eons for you to come back to me and now you want to make me wait for my present too?" He pouts. Jonathan has taken to resorting to the occasional guilt trip regarding my absence. I know he misses me, so I've been doing my best to ignore them, but it still hurts a little. If it wasn't for everything I'm going through right now, there's no place I'd rather be than back home in his arms. With that said, I need to be here focusing on my recovery and learning how to balance my SCI and this pregnancy so that everything runs smoothly.
"Yeah, well, the package is set to self-destruct if it's opened prematurely." I laugh.
"Drat!" He sighs, his eyes glinting with playfulness.
"Yep, sorry Jon, I guess you'll just have to bide your time." I say. "But I promise you it'll be worth it."
"Story of my life, baby Sister. I'm forever biding my time waiting for something that's worth it." He winks.
"Aww, you think I'm worth it?" I gush.
"Nope, I know you're worth it, Clary. I love you." He nods.
"I love you, so much, Jon." I say, trying not to cry. "I'll call you on the phone tomorrow and we can get kinky." I laugh instead.
"Mmm, I like the way you think Clarissa." He says, managing to make my name sound like a naughty word.
"Have a good night, Babe." I say softly. "And dream of me."
"I always do, honey. I always do." And with that, we disconnect the call. I make my way to the kitchen for a drink of water and by the time I'm done, Jace is back. He brings the groceries in and I help to put them away.
"They didn't have your stupid cheese powder stuff, so I bought a case of KD, so you can use the little pouches from there and then I can just make a pasta salad sometime with the noodles. However, I don't know if being pregnant is really a good enough excuse for putting cheese and pickles on your ice cream sundae but hey, that's just me." He grins.
"Yeah well, you already know I'm a weird person." I say.
"Do you mean for your ice cream toppings or for dating your brother?" He teases.
"Probably a bit of both." I laugh.
"How did your call go, by the way?" He asks.
"What makes you think I called Jon while you were out?" I say indignantly.
"You always call Jon while I'm out and only when I'm out, Clary. He doesn't know I live here, does he?"
"Well, he knows I have a personal assistant living with me. He's just never inquired as to the gender of said assistant and I've never offered that information. What's the point in going out of my way to make him jealous when there is nothing for him to be jealous over, right?" I sigh. This web of lies is suffocating me, of course. But now that I've made my bed, I have to lie in it.
"Yeah… right." Jace says.
Uneventful Weeks
I end up having so many appointments to go to, between doctor's appointments for my pregnancy and for my SCI as well as physio and some other holistic therapy stuff as well. I find myself drowning in a sea of appointments and paperwork and I'm even starting prenatal classes soon and it's just all so much! I've been using my down time to completely vegetate whenever I get the chance, which isn't nearly as often as I like. Thankfully, Jace gets paid to humor me, so I'm able to pass my boredom easily with his help.
We play all kinds of video games, since I don't feel like doing much else, when I'm not doing my exercises. So our days are filled with girly games like Harvest Moon, The Sims, Super Monkey Ball, and Singstar. Although I do break down and let him convince me to play X-men Legends, which is far less girly than some of the others but surprisingly fun. Of course, I play all of the girly characters when we do so I guess that counts.
Jace must take his job very seriously because he never has friends over and always just hangs out with me. Sometimes when I'm having a good day, we go to the movies or something since the theater nearby is handicap accessible. Speaking of which, my doctors and therapists (who are all at the top in their respective fields) have set a goal for me for my recovery. They say that as long as there are no complications with the pregnancy and I continue to put in the kind of effort I have been, they can foresee me walking unassisted in three or four years!
I know, I know, that sounds like a horribly long time yet, but if it's theoretically going to take three or four years for me to be walking completely unassisted, then I could be taking my first steps in about half that time I would think. Which lines up perfectly, because the pediatrician I spoke with said that from the time the baby is born, it should take less than two years to figure out if there are any developmental effects resulting from our shared genomes.
So, it looks like in two years' time I might be going home to Jon with our little toddler and a pair of working legs. That is, if he forgives me for deceiving him. But I have to look on the bright side. After all, the thought of being back in my brother's arms is what has been motivating me to work hard. If I allow myself to dwell on the fact that it might not happen that way, I'll be shooting myself in the proverbial foot.
Anyway, eventually Jace says to me those magic words every girl wants to hear. 'Let's go shopping!' And so, we do. My doctors think that I will be able to carry to term as long as I remain healthy and so for the first time, I've allowed myself to picture having this baby and not losing it. So that means I need baby stuff. We hit one of those fancy boutiques for babies and buy a matching set of Alice in Wonderland baby gear. I'm supposed to be having a girl, although they say it's not guaranteed that it will be. So I decided I want stuff that's unique and a little bit girly but not too much pink.
This style is great cuz they are mostly black with pink accents. So we get a play yard, a stroller, a car seat and a little folding seat with soothing music and vibration and toys hanging from it. We continue with the black and pink theme for the nursery and pick up an adorable bedding set and this great furniture set with a sort of antique look to it. Also, a lady there tells me to look online for baby dresses on a site called Nancy August so when we get home with all our purchases, I proceed to set up an account on their sight and add a whole bunch of dresses to 'my shopping bag' so that once she arrives I can order it all and receive it right away.
And of course a few weeks later, since I'm getting as big as a house now, we have to go shopping again so I can buy more clothes that actually fit me. "I'm so fat! Ugh, I'm like Shamu!" I exclaim, coming out of the changing room in a grey angora sweater and maternity jeans. "This weight gain can't be all from the baby! And that means I'm going to have a ton of weight to lose afterwards!" I sigh.
"Relax, Clary you look gorgeous. Stop complaining, you've been exercising and you've been eating healthy for most of your meals. There's nothing more you can do except cross that bridge when you come to it. You're supposed to gain weight when you're pregnant. And if you have some to lose after the baby is born, so be it. You'll tackle it head on when the time comes, just as you've tackled your pregnancy and your injury, alright?" Jace smiles encouragingly.
"Yeah, thank you. You're right I suppose, as usual. Why do you have to be so stinkin' smart all the time?" I huff.
"Because I'm just that good, now come on, let's go ring all your purchases through, so we can go get some frozen yogurt, okay?" He grins.
"Fine, I guess ten new outfits are enough, since I only have two more months left anyway." I smile, happy that I don't have that long to wait anymore to meet the new addition. I've been stressing out about names lately because I wish I knew what Jon would want our child's name to be so that we are both happy about the decision. But how do I ask him something like that without him figuring it out? Ugh, this is all so hard. I can't wait until I am back at home and my life is back to normal.
Unprepared Girl
"What do you want to do tonight?" Jace asks me one night, after my eight and a half month pregnant self, gets back from the bathroom for like the one millionth time. Except this time was a bit different and there is only one thing I want to do right now.
"Oh I dunno, how about go to the hospital?" I remark casually.
"Okay yeah we could… wait. What did you just say!?" He realizes with a panic.
"Yeah, I think I've started to go into labor." I grin.
"Holy crow!" He yells. "I'll get the car."
And so at 3:15 the following morning, after much hard work, a beautiful, healthy, little girl is born. I am going to call her Adele Seraphina. Because when I finally had a chance to talk to Jonathan about what he would hypothetically name his daughter; that was the name he suggested. I never would have thought one tiny little angel could be so beautiful. Her skin is so soft and she looks completely peaceful when she's sleeping. Jace was there for me through everything, the whole ordeal. I guess he and I are best friends now, because there's no way that my parents have paid him nearly enough for everything he's done for me. I have to believe it's because he genuinely considers me a friend.
And if I didn't believe it before, I sure do now. When Adele was born, Jace actually cried. Although I'm sure if you ask him about it later on he will totally deny it. I'm still in disbelief that she's healthy. It's so much more than I ever could have dreamed possible. I wish I could tell Jonathan. I know the scariest part is over now that she's here and she's healthy and I can see her with my own two eyes. But I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop. I mean, with our sister Valentina, they knew right away that she wasn't gonna make it, so I suppose I should be relieved that they're saying she's healthy, I just can't wrap my head around it, I guess.
Jace is sitting in the rocking chair in my hospital room holding Adele right now and I'm supposed to be trying to rest. It's just so hard because I have all these thoughts swimming around in my head. And she is like three weeks early and she's so tiny. She only weighs 5 lbs, 6 oz. She's so little I just find it hard to believe that she can be healthy. I'm counting my blessings and silent tears of joy keep sneaking down my cheeks but yet a part of me still can't believe it.
And then too, I keep thinking, am I even ready for this? I was supposed to still have a few weeks to prepare and now I don't and I'm just shaking with nerves at the thought that I'm actually a mom now. And it's barely even sinking in that the tiny bundle in Jace's arms is my own little Adele. I am just so grateful that she's here and she's well.
I decide to sing her a lullaby thinking that it will not only soothe my baby girl to sleep but possibly also help me to sleep as well. So, my little angel and I both drift off to the sound of my promises as I tell her all about the diamond ring and the looking glass and the billy goat and the other wonderful things that she will have.
And as I lay here reflecting on the last year of my life, I wonder how many of the choices I've made have been good ones. I think about my decision to be with Jonathan. I think about my injury. I think about my recovery and my decision to come to Rochester. I think about my decision to keep all of this from Jon. I even think about my friendship with Jace. Soon sleep takes me and I don't think any more about these things for now. I wonder if it's even possible to know what will come of my choices. Maybe I won't know the answer to that for many, many years.
AN: Sorry about the time skips. I just didn't want to take too long dealing with the pregnancy. Thought you all might be anxious to meet Adele =) Welcome to the world little Miss Morgenstern!