he Dragon in the Maelstrom

Chapter 29: Red Clouds and Blue Skies.

Written by Jlargent.

Me: The hunt for Tsunade is on! Now if any of you are expecting Itachi and Kisame to make an appearance you are going to be sorely disappointed. In all the Naruto fanfics I've read it's always those two so I thought 'What if it was two different members of the Akatsuki that meets Naruto instead of canon?' so I started to think about who should show up instead and I think I might pull it off. Now typical disclaimers apply, I do not own Naruto or Avatar the Last Airbender in any shape or form.

Naruto's POV

"Stupid godfather, if it weren't for the fact that he's a seal master and my dad's teacher I would've castrated him when we first met." I grumble to myself while mulling over the fact that said godfather is more than likely getting bitch slapped because he can't raise his dick up. It has been two days since leaving Konoha to find Tsunade Senju to be the Fifth Hokage seeing as her grandfather and granduncle were two of the founding Hokage's and the best med nin in the world Jiraiya has been dragging me from town to town to 'keep tabs' on his spy network but in reality he heads into the local whorehouses and returns back to the apartment smelling of cheap sex and even cheaper alcohol.

Jiraiya finally let me sign the toad contract and I summoned a small toad by the name of Gamakichi who is the son of the boss toad Gamabunta and after mentioning my dad he told me some stories about him and agreed to serve under me when I turned 17 or unless there's an emergency. And now I'm here in this motel waiting for the lazy bastard to return from failing to get laid.

A knock at the door brings my attention back to the here and now "Alright, alright keep your shirt on pervert. Seriously, keep your shirt on, no one wants to see you topless." I yell as I make my way to the door, I open the door and to my surprise it wasn't the mega pervert instead standing at the door was two men, the first man looks to be in his early twenties with long blonde hair kept in a ponytail and a large strand covering his left eye making it hard to determine his actual gender and the second person accompanying him looked to be in his late twenties with silver hair slicked back wearing a necklace of that has a circle with an inverted triangle I know I've seen that symbol somewhere but I can't place it. On his back was a scythe with three blades at varying lengths. Both men were wearing black overcoats with red clouds straw hats with paper streamers and a small bell rings lightly.

"Hey Hidan this is the kid right?" the blonde spoke to his 'partner' (A/N: Sorry but this is way too tempting to not pass up.) as the silver haired man takes a good look at me.

"Yeah Deidara, the leader wants him." Hidan said and I barely noticed him reaching for his scythe.

"Um, am I missing something here? Because I don't swing that way." I deadpanned to the two. Deidara was now pissed off and he definitely showed it.

"I AM NOT GAY!" Deidara shouts at me, I hold my hands up in an apologetic gesture.

"Whoa, whoa I didn't mean anything by that. It's just that the two of you are dressed alike and have your fingernails painted black so of course they would think that you two would be gay." I said, and now Hidan looks at me with a seriously pissed off look on his face.

"Forget taking him to the leader! I say we kill this little fucking piece of shit!" Hidan growls pulling out his scythe fully noting that it was stained red possibly with dried blood.

"Dude, when was the last time you actually cleaned that scythe? I mean seriously, you could get herpes or something." I taunted Hidan before leaping out the window making the two of them chase me.

"Hahahaha! Now you'll have a first hand look at my art. Ninja Art: Homing Pigeon Bombs!" Deidara calls out and five clay pigeons fly out of his cloak and head towards me at breakneck speeds, I dodge two of them only for them to collide into a nearby cart resulting in a large explosion that nearly deafening me, I wince slightly as a large piece of wood debris cuts my cheek and I lean back to barely avoid a downward slash from Hidan's three bladed scythe. Luckily his blades only manages to hit the blood that's already on my cheek.

"Heh, it looks like it's my lucky day. Jashin will greatly reward me for spilling your blood. You dumb little shit!" Hidan calls out as a metal spike emerges from his sleeve, he raises his scythe and licks my blood that was on the blade and with one smooth motion literally impales himself with the spike that he was carrying.

"Holy shit!" I exclaim as a large amount of blood pools from the wound.

"Ha, this is nothing!" Hidan says as he places a foot into the pool of blood and starts making a symbol from it, when he was finished it was a larger version of the symbol on his necklace, suddenly I hear a whistling from above me. I leap towards my left to avoid a clay pigeon impacting the ground and a small explosion following afterwards I strain my ears and throw a kunai hitting one that was coming towards me from behind and toss one more to my side hitting the last one. I breathe a sigh of relief when a sharp throbbing pain strikes my legs, I look down to see a pair of kunai lodged into my calves I look around and see Deidara on a giant clay owl smirking.

"Now I will offer your soul to Jashin!" Hidan exclaims and his skin was now black with white marking making him look like a grim reaper, he grabs the spike and stabs into himself again Is this guy some sort of masochist or somARG! my thoughts were interrupted by an intense stabbing pain in my chest and blood started to appear on my chest What the hell? He stabbed himself but I'm taking the damage instead…wait that's it! That symbol, now I remember from a lecture that Iruka did about Jashin…and if I'm right when he licked my blood off of his scythe he triggered a curse upon it. While he's in that symbol any damage inflicted on him will go to the victim instead, now how can I stop this? I could either destroy the symbol or force him out of it. I thought to myself as Hidan stabs himself again, I restrain myself from giving him the satisfaction of hearing me cry out in pain.

"Hahahaha! Now die in the name of Jashin!" he crowed as he stabs himself repeatedly, I cry out in pain as my knees start to shake No, I can't let it end like this…there must be some way to use this against him I thought to myself while relying on sheer willpower alone to stay standing up I got it! If he gives out damage by inflicting pain on himself maybe it goes both ways. I hope that I'm right I resolve summoning two shadow clones and had both of them draw out their swords.

Hidan sneers "You must really be a dumb ass if you think that you can kill me. I have been blessed by Lord Jashin himself to carry out his will!" Hidan shouts as he prepares to stab himself yet again, and to his surprise my clones turn to face me and in one smooth motion they stab me "Hahaha, I KNEW that you're an idiot but stabbing yourself is really a dumb ass mistake. Hrk!" Hidan grunted as he suddenly clutches his sides where I 'stabbed' myself.

I laugh weakly "Who's the dumb ass now?" I said, my strength gradually returning to me and had the clones prepare to attack me again, only for Deidara to suddenly swoop in on his owl and literally carry Hidan off. I dispel the clones and collapse onto my knees as exhaustion sets in.

To be continued.

Me: Merry Christmas everyone! I make this story 20% cooler every time I write a new chapter. Next time: Azula and Anko finally find a home to live in. See the hilarity that's associated with owning a new home.

As always Hoody Hoo!