So…this idea had been digging at me for a long time. So I finally mustered up the courage to write it. Plz enjoy.

Plot: Castiel tells Dean his story about going to Hell.

. . .

Chapter 23: Hell in the Angel's Eyes

Castiel sighed as he lay on his stomach on the motel room bed. He closed his eyes, feeling his entire being relax as he laid his head on Dean's lap and the hunter ran soothing fingers through his feathers. He hadn't had a full blown grooming like this in years. Dean was literally brushing through every single feather on his six wings.

Dean smiled when he felt his angel relax on his lap. He could sense the bliss as he touched the beautiful feathers that sprawled across the entire bed. He paused when he noticed a spot in the back of one of the wings in the middle. He furrowed his eyebrows as he touched them gently. They were extremely cold and he almost pulled his hand back from the ice shooting into his fingertips. He took a closer look at the feathers and noticed how different the patch looked. It was not as silky-looking like the rest. Instead it was rough and felt as though it had been burned all the way down. He felt Castiel tense up as he touched it.

"Castiel…what happened right here?" Dean asked, frowning at the way it felt. He wondered if it was painful.

Castiel was silent for a moment as he tried to think of a way to say it. He didn't want to upset Dean and he knew no matter how he put it, the hunter would feel guilty. So he resorted to the only excuse he could think of "I don't know."

Dean huffed "You're lying," he said, moving a hand to turn the angel to face him.

Castiel took a deep breath and composed his face before meeting the steady green gaze "I am not lying," he said.

Dean arched an eyebrow "Is that so? Because your wings tell me you're lying."

Castiel tilted his head.

"Yes, they do actually show me how your feeling," Dean said "So tell me the truth…what happened?"

"Dean," Castiel said in the tone that meant he was done with the discussion.

"Cas," Dean said stubbornly "If you don't tell me I won't touch your wings until you decide to."

Castiel narrowed his eyes "You wouldn't be able to resist."

Dean lifted his eyebrows and pulled his hands over to his sides "Try me," he said.

"I don't want to talk about it," Castiel said, wishing Dean hadn't seen them.

"Too friggen bad now tell me," Dean said, staring intently into the blue gaze.

Castiel sighed, feeling defeated "I'll tell you…but you have to promise me you won't think about anything differently…what happened was in the past."

Dean nodded, knowing if someone hurt Castiel, he would kill them despite his promise.

Castiel nodded and stared down "It…it happened in Hell."

Dean felt his heart clench and a wave of ice shoot up his spine and through his veins "W…when you dove down to get me?"

Castiel nodded but smiled "I don't regret it, though."

Dean felt a lump in his throat as he touched the feathers again, feeling a wave of guilt pass through him as he realized Castiel would have been perfectly fine if it wasn't for him. He blinked away the sting in his eyes "I thought you got your old wings removed?"

Castiel turned his eyes to the wall behind Dean "I did…the injury is not so much of my wings as it is my grace," he said.

Dean flinched, realizing how much worse that sounded "How did it happen?" he asked, locking his gaze back with blue.

Castiel frowned "It's nothing," he dismissed.

"Cas," Dean said in a warning tone "You better tell me."

Castiel sighed "Please Dean," he said "I know you'll just blame yourself and it's not your fault."

"Yeah and if you don't tell me, my mind will start coming up with ways you could've been hurt…and trust me, Cas…my mind can get pretty dark," Dean said, feeling his stomach coil.

Castiel sighed again, letting his head fall back on the bed "You are truly stubborn, Dean."

"Yes I am," Dean said, caressing those wings again "So what happened?"

Castiel took a deep breath, meeting the emerald gaze before telling his story.

. . .The Day Castiel Goes To Hell. . .

"So Castiel, are you prepared to dive down and retrieve the soul?" Zachariah asked as he walked towards the line of soldiers. Castiel and Uriel were pairing up together to go through Hell. Uriel would be there for support while Castiel grabbed the soul, which would indeed be protected, considering he was the Righteous One. This had been Castiel's destiny though so he had been trained to do this.

"I am ready," Castiel said with a nod. Of course he was feeling afraid. He had heard about Hell and the types of things that went on down there but he was a warrior now and had been waiting for this day his entire existence. He frowned slightly when he thought about Gabriel…the older brother who had left so long ago. He was the reason Castiel wasn't afraid to begin with…he wished that Gabriel could see him now.

"Alright then," Zachariah said "Go on."

Castiel glanced at Uriel, whose face was void of all emotion but he could see the hint of anxiety in the other angel. Uriel gave him a look and with that, they both spread their wings. Castiel's were longer than all of the other angels in their rank and arched more considering his destiny was to retrieve the soul. His wings were made to fly through the fires in the deepest parts of Hell. They then dove down.

The trip into the other realm seemed to happen fast and Castiel could see the slit through the ground as he barreled at the speed of light. He closed his eyes as they shot through into the black abyss.

He hissed out and his wings stuttered, almost causing him to fall once they entered the fiery hot atmosphere. Castiel quickly grabbed onto Uriel's arm as the other angel lost all flight ability for a moment. After a few seconds, Uriel straightened out and gave Castiel a thankful nod.

Castiel couldn't believe he was in Hell…it was worse than he imagined. He scanned the area around him, searching for the pull in the right direction. Hell was dark and gloomy; the 'sky' was more of an expanse of massive clouds of black smoke and blood colored atmosphere. Large drops of fiery hot lava fell from above, charring small parts of Castiel's wings. It was painful but it was something he had prepared for. In the distance, he could see large mountain-like landscapes made up of skin and bones and other body parts that made Castiel feel queasy. The ground was flat and made up of black dirt consisting of more bones. Trailing along the scattered remains were demons of all shapes and sizes. Some were larger, some were smaller, some had many horns and others large bat-like wings. Their true forms beneath the human cover they would wear. He could see the eyes in colors of red, black, white, yellow and even some that were green. White was the highest rank of demon and luckily, there was only one in the vicinity.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he tried to pinpoint the location of the soul. He winced and held his hands over his head as the screams and prayers of all the other souls pierced through his being.

He felt Uriel place a hand on his shoulder so he opened his eyes.

"Remember what you were taught. You have to block the other voices…focus on the righteous one," he said loudly and Castiel nodded, closing his eyes again to focus. The Righteous One would have a soul more powerful than the rest in Hell. He began close off his prayer line and after a moment, all voices disappeared. He shot open the bond he had with the Righteous One in the name of Dean Winchester. He immediately began to feel a pull in his grace.

"I-I got it," Castiel said, turning back to Uriel.

Uriel gave a nod "Now follow it…and whatever you do, don't stop for anything."

Castiel of course knew that already. He had been trained to do this for a while. He knew the rules…go directly to the Righteous One – Dean – and do not stop for anything or anyone else. He gave a long flap of his wings and began to descend forward, towards the soul that shined so brightly. Uriel followed close behind, his own deep mahogany wings keeping him a close but also save distance away. It was not smart to travel too close together in case a demon happened to latch onto one of them or have a trap set up. They needed enough distance for one to be able to save the other.

Castiel sucked in a breath that burned hotter than fire down his throat as they passed over one of the deep pits filled with souls being tortured. The scent of coppery blood and sulfur filled his nose and screams of agony filled his ears but he ignored his senses and continued his way.

He jumped and hissed out in pain when he felt something latch onto his leg. It seemed to pierce through his entire body with a sharp, hot pain. He quickly stopped, his wings keeping him descended somewhat off the ground. He glanced down to see what he assumed to be a Hellhound with its large, sharp teeth dug into his leg. He Hellhound's eyes were flat but smoky black as they seemed to pierce into Castiel's very being. He stared in shock as flames rippled up the hounds entire body and snarls sounded from him.

His wings twitched as he tried to shake the thing off and suddenly, a bright white light shot through at the hound. He yelped out in a cry before falling limp to the ground with a thud. Castiel whirled around to Uriel, whose hand was out. He turned to Castiel "What were you thinking! You know you aren't supposed to freeze like that!"

Castiel flinched, knowing he froze. He had been frightened for a moment…he couldn't do this…he thought he could but he couldn't. He shook slightly and turned big, blue eyes to Uriel "I-I can't do this," he said.

"Yes you can, Castiel. This is your destiny! You can do it," Uriel urged "Now we must go on. We have attracted much unnecessary attention with that blast of grace!"

Castiel nodded, feeling another wave of pride pass over him. Yes, he was meant to do this. He couldn't stop…it was destiny. His grace coiled inside of him as he heard demons closing in on them. In a blast, him and Uriel shot out of the area.

Castiel could feel himself getting closer to the soul. It was tugging every part of him. He closed his eyes and shot closer. He heard a shout and instantly stopped to turn. He gasped when he saw Uriel surrounded by at least three yellow-eyed demons and a red-eyed demon, each using their batlike wings to keep up in the air.

Castiel shot a wave of his grace forward, catching one of the demons off guard. It fell to the ground in a heap.

"No Castiel! You must save your grace for the soul!" Uriel shouted "Go on. I'll smite these demon scum."

"I won't leave you," Castiel said defiantly as he flew forward. One of the yellow eyed demons whirled around to him. Castiel ducked as a blast of hellfire shot at him. He immediately pressed his palm onto the demon's forehead. The demon cried out a white light beamed through its eyes and mouth.

"Castiel go!" Uriel shouted as he waved a sword around, slicing at the demons closing in on him.

Castiel remembered his sword and he unsheathed it. He spun in midair, catching the blade with a wing from one of the demons. The demon flailed in the air for a moment before its wings gave out.

"Go to Alastair!" one of the demons called "They are trying to claim the soul!"

"Go!" Uriel shouted "I can take care of them. Go!"

Castiel hesitated a moment before sheathing his sword. He gave Uriel a nod before shooting through Hell at the speed of light. His wings could now be used to their full extent now that he was alone. If he had gone as fast as he was allowed before, then Uriel would be left behind in a cloud of dust. Castiel's wings were meant to pull this soul out so they were stronger.

He could feel and hear the demons closing in around him but he was too fast for them to comprehend. He was getting closer and closer to the soul – Dean – he reminded himself. Calling a human soul by their name would usually help in making them remember who they were.

He felt his grace burst with determination when his eyes set up on the bright, white light that was Dean's soul. He stared in amazement. He had never seen a soul shine so brightly before. It was shining like the moon in a black, starless sky. He gulped deeply as he dove down to grab the soul.

He could see that it was a young man. A young man which a soul brighter than anything Castiel had ever seen.

He felt his grace pump inside of him as he began to lower down to the soul. He noticed the man backing away from another human soul that he had been torturing. When his emerald eyes set on Castiel, they widened with fright. The man – Dean – trembled and backed up, falling over in the process.

"Please don't hurt me…I did what you said," he said, hiding his head.

"Dean Winchester…my name is Castiel. I am an Angel of the Lord. I am here to save you," Castiel said, knowing Dean would not remember him once he was out but at the moment, he needed to know. It would make saving this soul easier.

"No! There is no such thing! There is nothing but evil!" Dean shouted angrily, his soul light wavering.

Castiel gasped and spun around when he felt demons closing in. He immediately hovered over the soul protectively as he swung the sword about. The demons hissed and snarled and snapped at him.

Castiel could feel his grace wavering as one of the demons hurled Hellfire at him. His wings twitched as he smote and shoved the demons. Their eyes were glowing in arrays of blacks and reds and yellows. He fought and fought for what felt like hours. He took out dozens of demons before he could feel his entire being start to weaken. His wings ached and cried out in pain when he felt several claws dig into his feathers. That was when they gave out and he collapsed onto the soot covered ground. Fiery hot pain shot up from the ground and spikes started to jut out. He let out another yelp when he felt claws tearing his wings. He could feel the warm stickiness begin to soak him.

He closed his eyes to hide from the pain…he knew he couldn't do this…he wasn't meant to do this. He was weak…he was failing. He could feel his grace burning inside of him from the taint of demon's touch.

It felt like years passing by as he lay in a crumpled heap on the ground. He was drifting in and out of reality. He could smell the demon scum and hear the hissing of their voices around him. They were malicious and talked of the Righteous Soul… they spoke of how he they captured him…they spoke of using him to make a deal with Heaven.

They tried to get Castiel to talk…he couldn't…he wouldn't…he failed his destiny. He failed his Father and Heaven and his brothers. He failed them all…he didn't deserve anything but death.

"Hey Angel," a demon spoke. Castiel peered through heavy eyes. He was lying on a table. A demon with white eyes stood above him…the demon was strong…Castiel knew this demon was strong. He closed his eyes again and felt his battered wings being strapped down.

"You will speak!" the demon snarled angrily and Castiel yelped out in agony as a wave of Hellfire poured through him.

"Dean!" the demon shouted.

Castiel opened his eyes. Dean…the Righteous Soul…he was near. He could see the bright light…he could feel the warmth of the soul. He saw the soul step closer…it's light was dimming…Castiel knew this soul was changing. He needed to get him out. He needed to save this soul. He couldn't move…he was too weak.

"Torture this angel," the demon ordered.

Castiel turned eyes to the soul who squinted at him. He knew this soul could see him…his true form was visible to souls in Hell and Heaven. He wondered what this soul – Dean – saw…perhaps a broken angel?

Dean looked afraid as he stared at the demon "But Alastair…I cannot hurt an angel," he said, his voice shaking.

"You will do so or you will return to the rack!" the demon – Alastair – shouted. Castiel could feel the rage; it was penetrating into his being…it hurt.

Dean let out a sigh "I will not," he said "I have tortured human souls but you cannot make me do this."

Castiel felt his grace lighten…he could see why Dean was the Righteous…he was so kind and caring. He didn't deserve to be in Hell. He felt a need to move forward again.

"No!" Dean shouted and Castiel cried out in pain so loud the ground shook. He could feel claws digging into his gut…into his grace. He screamed and writhed in pain…he could see white in his vision as his grace coiled and radiated in agonizing pain. He could feel the demon tainting his grace…ruining it. Castiel cried out louder when the claws twisted his grace. He could feel more grace spilling from his eyes and mouth. He could feel his wings flailing and thrashing about, trying to free from this torture. He couldn't take it anymore…he couldn't take this.

He heard a familiar voice…a battle cry from his partner; Uriel. There was a bright light and a flap of wings belonging to a demon. Alastair was flying away; Castiel could feel the release from the claws inside of him. He was weak…his grace tried to heal but in Hell he didn't have the ability to reach Heaven.

"Castiel!" Uriel's voice shouted, shaking the ground below them.

Castiel tried to open his eyes. He could feel the warmth of grace touching his. His eyes fluttered open slightly. He could see the bright, beaming light from the other angel.

"Castiel…come on Castiel. You wake up now! You don't give up on your brothers and sisters!" Uriel was shouting.

"Uriel…I am so tired," Castiel said weakly.

"We must leave now Castiel. There are more demons coming! You must save the soul," Uriel had said in a demanding tone.

The soul...Dean Winchester…Castiel needed to pull him out. He needed to free the soul from the clutches of Hell. He winced as he sat up.

He turned to see the soul brightly beside them. It was shining like a beacon in a dark forest. Dean backed up, his eyes grazing over the two angels.

Castiel could feel more demons coming. He needed to do this now or never. He jumped up to his feet, his battered and broken wings throbbing. He had no idea how he was going to do this…grace still leaked from his gut.

"Castiel! Let's go!" Uriel shouted.

"I am going to bring you back to your brother, Dean Winchester," Castiel said staring into the lost eyes. Those eyes brightened with recognition "Sammy?" he asked.

"Yes," Castiel said warmly, letting his wings curl to comfort the soul.

"Sammy…" Dean was saying with a smile lighting those feature.

"You must let me take you," Castiel said "I will not harm you."

Dean smiled again and his soul lightened drastically at the mention of his brother. Castiel gave him a nod and suddenly dozens of demons came flying and charging towards them. Dean was backing up but Castiel closed his hand onto Dean's upper arm. He gasped when a tingling and suddenly warmth shot through his entire being. He could feel Dean gasp at the same moment as though he felt it too. Then there was a sudden, bright white light beaming in every direction. Castiel felt something inside of him he had never felt before. It was nice and made him feel an entire new wave of hope. The white light began to fade and Castiel was amazed to see the piles of demons on the ground in lifeless heaps. With that, he realized that his wings were healed and his grace was lit again. He glanced at Uriel and nodded and together, they shot up into the air.

Castiel gripped the soul tightly as they darted up at a speed that was unknown. They were getting closer…Castiel could see the beacon that led to Earth. With a deep breath, they pierced through the veil. He could feel the soul leave his grip as they entered Earth. He closed his eyes and kept going up. He stopped once he landed in the Heaven he enjoyed.

The moment he landed, he collapsed onto the grass. He was so weak…he was just too weak to move. He could hear voices and cheers around him. He didn't want to move. That trip drained him…

"Castiel! Castiel are you alright?" a familiar voice sounded.

Castiel let his eyes open and he stared into the eyes of his closest friend, Balthazar. His expression was filled with concern as he already resided in a vessel.

Castiel closed his eyes again and was thankful when he heard Balthazar tell the other angels to leave. He then felt hands close around him. He felt a breeze and felt his body being placed into what he knew was a healing room. He could already feel the warmth.

He couldn't open his eyes but he could hear the voice of Michael speaking. He seemed concerned…Castiel had always thought Michael would be happy about this day.

"I can heal him mostly but I'm afraid some of the damage to his grace will be permanent," another voice was saying.

There was a moment of silence…Castiel didn't like the idea of his grace being permanently damaged…but he could not find reason to be upset. He did it for the soul – he did it for Dean Winchester, the soul that he now felt a connection with. It was something entirely knew to him and for some reason, all he wanted to do was go and see him again. He wanted to make sure he was okay.

"Are you sure there is nothing we can do?" Michael was asking.

"I'm afraid not. He was in in the pit for two months," the other voice was saying "You know how time is in Hell…they tortured him the entire time."

There was another moment of silence and Castiel wanted to see what was happening but he couldn't find the strength to move.

"Is he in pain?" Michael was asking.

"I don't believe so…but he is very weak," the other voice said – the healer – from what Castiel assumed.

Castiel felt his grace turn inside of him when he felt a warm, powerful grace touch over him "Thank you Castiel…you did great," Michael said, sending a wave of comforting grace into Castiel. Castiel closed his eyes as a dream-like state took over.

. . .Present Time. . .

Dean was staring with his stomach turning as Castiel finished up "When I woke, that was when I tried to speak with you…and well, you know the rest from there."

Dean felt his stomach turning inside of him "Alastair tortured you?" he asked, feeling awful. Castiel would have been fine if he didn't have to dive into Hell for him.

"Dean, I told you it wasn't your fault. You were about to go back on the rack so you wouldn't have to torture me," Castiel said as he stared up into those green eyes "You have no idea what that meant to me. You were the only reason I had the willpower to go on."

There was a moment of silence where Castiel stared deeply at Dean.

"Dean you were the one who saved me from Hell," Castiel said, his eyes sincere.

Dean gulped and nodded, feeling a sting in his eyes as tears tried to fall. He blinked them away "You know I love you."

Castiel smiled "I love you too Dean," he whispered, turning onto his back so he could pull Dean into his arms. He let out a long breath and smiled "I never thought we would ever end up like this."

Dean smiled…he felt bad but deep down, he knew Castiel didn't blame him. He took a deep breath and closed his arms around his angel, breathing in that glorious scent.

Castiel smiled warmly at Dean. He gently lifted the sleeve of Dean's t-shirt to reveal the handprint he had left there. He placed his hand over it, feeling that electric tingle through his skin that always happened when he did so.

Dean shivered at the incredible feeling. He turned his eyes to stare at the inhuman blue.

"When I touched your soul…that was when we formed our bond," Castiel said softly, now letting his fingers brush over the mark "Our bond was so powerful that when it happened we killed two dozen demons."

Dean lifted his eyebrows. Castiel had mentioned that in his story but Dean didn't realize that was what it meant. He had thought the light was because of an angel and a soul. He smiled though to see the joy in his angel's eyes. He gently cupped Castiel's cheek and pulled him into a slow and passionate kiss.

Now he felt like he knew Castiel more and he felt more connected than ever before. He loved him so much and that would never change. He suddenly didn't regret a moment in Hell. If he had never gone to Hell…if Alastair had never broken him…he would never have met Castiel.

. . .

. (Meanwhile, when Castiel is alone and unconscious after saving Dean from Hell).

Gabriel took a quick glance around to be sure that nobody was in the area. The last thing he needed was to be discovered. He slowly let his wings close in as he entered the Healing Room. He gazed at the angel on the bed. He felt his grace warm inside of him and he smiled. He remembered when Castiel had just been a small and young angel, terrified about his future. Not he was a warrior. He just dove into Hell and pulled out the Righteous Soul. Gabriel couldn't be more proud of how well this angel grew.

He slowly placed a hand on the angel and frowned when he felt the damage in the grace. He felt somewhat of anger drift through him at the idea that his younger brother was permanently injured because of that human. Dean Winchester…it was his fault Castiel was hurt.

Gabriel ground his teeth, fighting the urge to find that Winchester and tear him a new one. Instead, he pushed those feelings back and spoke gently enough so that nobody in Heaven could hear him. He knew Castiel was unconscious and wouldn't hear the words but he wanted to speak them, anyways.

"I am so proud of you, Castiel," he whispered as he let a soothing hand touch over the bright form. With that, he could feel another presence…it was Michael. He knew his the other archangel could sense him but Gabriel couldn't let him be seen. He quickly left Heaven to return to Earth.

Michael walked into the room…he was so sure he sensed his long lost brother. When he opened the door, though, all he could see was Castiel in that sleep-like state. Michael sighed in disappointment and left again.

. . .

So…what did you think? I just HAD to add in that little part with Gabriel! :D And I'm sorry but I do like the idea of Michael being caring about the angel who pulled out his vessel. I don't like grumpy Michael.

Please leave reviews! Purty Plzzz? I worked hard on this chapter.