AN - Hi, guys! Wow, it's been a while, huh? I'm really sorry about that. I've kinda let myself get really obsessed with all these other fandoms, so my PokeSpe fics have been sitting in the corner gathering dust. But I figured, for some reason, this fic is pretty popular, and I do have a fondness for it myself, so I worked hard to crank out another update for you. With college and the like, I don't know when I'll update again, but I promise I'm not abandoning this fic, okay? Keep waiting and you'll get your sexytimes yet. Heck, this chapter has a fair bit...
Oh, also, I have a question. Should I raise this to MA, as opposed to just M? I mean, I firmly believe that this is tame enough for any sixteen year old to handle (I know I read worse stuff at that age), but just judging from what the guidelines tell me it should be MA, even if I personally don't think it's that explicit.
for Having an Overactive Libido
My mind shuts down instantly. I know Silver said not to freak out and let him explain the logic behind his thinking, but… Have sex… with you?
I'm reeling in a dazed panic from his words, and am hanging by shreds of sanity, barely avoiding flying off the handle. I mean, what the hell! How in god's name is having sex going to help us?! It'll only make things worse!
My brain is working at the speed of light, rationalizing and trying its utmost to figure out how Silver managed to come to the solution he did – and it's coming up frustratingly blank.
Meanwhile, my mouth has disconnected from my frazzled head, and is rambling incessantly. "H-have… sex? Wh-what the — how will that — why would you — I don't — just, what—"
Silver stares at me with unsympathetic eyes and lets out a growl in frustration. "No, that's why I told you to listen! Just—" he stalks towards me and clamps his hands on my shoulders, and I throw them off, backing into the wall, "—just calm down, and listen to me!"
"Listen?!" I gasp, "I, I don't even — what are you thinking? Are you just insane, or—"
"No!" Silver snarls, and there's this desperation in his eyes that scares and entices me and — and I just don't understand. What is going on?! He closes the distance between us and again grabs me by the shoulders. "Just shut up for, for two seconds!" he screams, and there's something almost animalistic about it all, the hard, fierce glint in his eyes.
Like a man facing a true predator, instinct takes over and I freeze in the face of danger. With our gazes locked, it seems as if time slows down, and my internal voice finally stops; for one blissful moment, my head is clear, free from my gripping emotions and unvoiced thoughts.
Silver searches my eyes for some sign that I'm finally calm and, seemingly finding it, drops his hands from where they'd been clenched uncomfortably tight on my shoulders.
He heaves a giant sigh and mutters, "…I told you not to freak out. Just, let me explain…" He sighs again, and runs a hand through his hair.
My heartbeat finally slows down to something resembling a normal pace in my chest, and I let out the breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding. Whatever logic he's using, whatever scheme he's cooked up… I'm ready for it.
So, I open my mouth and say, "I'm listening."
Silver tells me. He spends several minutes drilling into my head that the only reason we hooked up in the first place is because we were both completely drunk off our asses — as if I didn't already know that — and then goes on to explain that we're only still plagued by desire for each other because of some horrible miscommunication between our brains and our bodies. Or something like that.
"At our deepest level, people are primal creatures; we seek contact and… sex. After all, it's how we reproduce, so it's ingrained into us. We were hammered that night, to put it lightly, and so rational thought took a backseat to lust and instinct. Because we were so inebriated, the factors that generally would've been present to make us stop — namely, rationality — weren't there. And so what was left of our thought processes, the deeper, animalistic part was in complete control. We had sex, and on a base level it was good because it's ingrained into us on the most primal level that sex is good."
I stare at him blankly as he takes a deep breath and continues, "Our minds and bodies recognize each other more on that animalistic level than on a rational one. What I'm hoping for is that if we try — key word, try — to have sex again, this time completely sober, all the outlying factors that would cause us not to want to have sex would kick in and stop us, and override our deep-seeded desire in the process. If we put ourselves in the same situation that's caused this problem in the first place and come out with a different ending, maybe our mind will start recognizing each other on a higher, less primal, level."
…What?
Silver takes in my dazed expression and slumps a little bit. "…Did you take any of that in? Understand it at all?"
I cast him a sheepish smile. "…Not really. Too wordy. You lost me somewhere around 'rational thought', blah, blah…" He glowers at me and I hurry on, "But I think I got the gist of it! Basically if we try and have sex again our not-drunk minds will rebel against it and stop making us get all hot and bothered for each other, right?"
He twitches, and says, "That's an extremely simplified way of putting it, yes."
Well, when you put it that way… Anything to get this to stop. Besides, it's not like we're actually going to go all the way, right? So… there's nothing to worry about.
I gulp down a breath and succeed magnificently in ignoring my racing heart. "Okay, then. When you say it like that, it makes perfect sense. So… yeah. I guess… let's do this thing."
I can see him hesitate for a few scant seconds. "…You're sure?"
I sigh and scratch the back of my neck nervously. "Absolutely certain? Not even close. But I'm sure enough. I'm willing to go through with this if you are."
He screws his eyes shut, and only opens them once he's come to a decision. A tough determination cuts through me like steel; his gaze is steady on my own. "Alright."
He closes the distance between us swiftly, taking the few steps to stand chest-to-chest. I can feel his breath on my face and I realize uncomfortably that I am to endure this while being shoved unceremoniously against this wall.
Silver's eyes stray between my eyes and my lips, and I can see a flicker of uncertainty. He's nervous — so am I.
Time crawls around us and I stand pinned against the wall, Silver pressed flush against me, both of us unmoving.
He swallows thickly, and I know suddenly without a doubt that he's having second thoughts. He suggested this, but he can't bring himself to go through with it. I don't blame him; it's perfectly understandable for him to be a little unsure about all of this—hell, I'm questioning it a fair bit myself.
But still. It's a little late to back out now. Might as well ride this through and see where it takes us. He can't bring himself to continue, but I can.
I thrust my face forward and seal the few inches of space left between us; my lips crush against his.
He makes a muffled sound of surprise and stiffens, unresponsive as I keep pressing forward. He finally reacts when I've gently led him all the way across the room and now have his back pressed against the opposite wall.
The response is instantaneous: He makes a noise that is a cross between a groan and a growl and presses himself even closer, pulling me in with hands on my neck and in my hair.
Well.
This is not nearly as unenjoyable as I'm pretty sure it was meant to be.
Silver takes the lead, pushing forward and starting to lead me back to where I am the one pushed up against the opposite wall, but I'm having none of that.
Both of us are pushing, leading, attempting to dominate the other, moving around the middle of the room sort of like a dance – a very close dance.
Err… except not a dance at all, because not only is that inaccurate, but it's also totally girly and why the fuck did I just say that?
In any case, I'm pretty sure not even the closest of dances involve quite as much contact as is going on here. I've got my hands locked pretty securely around Silver's waist, while his hands – his dexterous, amazing hands – are roaming freely, up my chest, scratching down my back, and basically just going anywhere they damn well please and leaving a fricking awesome sensation in their wake.
He starts leading me back again, and for a moment, so caught up in the feel of his hands on my neck, hair, waist, thigh, I let him.
I trip over a box.
I topple down like an idiot, and take Silver with me, my hands still clenching him around the middle. I land on my back, hard, and Silver lands almost as painfully on top of me. I let out a whoosh of breath, thoroughly winded.
"Oof," I articulate.
I lock gazes with the man on top of me, and in addition to the arousal in his steely eyes, I see among other things, embarrassment – most likely due to leading me right into a box – and humor at my expense, because I've come to realize he can be slightly sadistic. And masochistic.
This is the point where we're supposed to stop.
This is the point where, whilst looking into each other's eyes, we find no spark, no romance, and laugh about it. The point where he stands up and offers me a hand, and we become best friends but nothing more and life goes on.
Suffice to say, that's not what happens.
Silver does spare a chuckle about the circumstances, and I can't help but make a comment about it. "You know, if you wanted me down on the floor, all you had to do was ask," I say like the loveable asshat that I am.
He flushes red for a moment before shrugging it off as a joke, and mutters, "Shut up." Then, to make absolutely certain I won't be a smartass and say something snarky in reply, he covers my mouth with his own.
I let him have his way with me for a little while, admittedly sort of enjoying the feeling of him on top of me, before rolling him over so that I am once again on top, leading, and dominating. I lick at his lips and he opens his mouth and lets me in.
He still tastes like raspberries.
…I am enjoying this way more than I should be. I mean…
I'm not supposed to be enjoying it at all.
His tongue does battle with mine, still fighting for control even whilst he seems to accept being the one on the floor. His oh-so-perfect hands tug at the bottom of my shirt, rising up…
I separate from him for a moment, both to breathe and to make it easier for him to finish pulling my shirt off. In the meantime, my not-nearly-as-perfect hands manage to successfully unbutton his pants with relatively little fumbling.
Silver looks up at me with quite enticing bedroom eyes and inclines his head towards a closed door, surely leading to his room. Leading to his bed.
Last chance to stop.
I get up slowly, eye the door, and make the decision with a lot less consideration and contemplation than even I thought I would need. I let him lead me inside.
You Level Up! at Intimacy 5!
I stare in surprise at the – double – bed that seems much too big for such a small room and finally go to sit uncomfortably on it while Silver rifles through the top drawer in his dresser.
Finally finding what it is he was looking for, he sets the items on the nightstand – I try not to think too hard about why he would have lube in addition to condoms – and joins me on the bed.
Silver initiates a kiss, and I reciprocate without hesitation.
That's… odd. Why am I not panicking? Not hesitating, or indeed not bolting right out of there? I am completely, one hundred percent sober, am making out with a guy, and I'm okay with it.
I wonder… what does this say about me? Am I… gay? No, I have to be at least bisexual, right? I mean, Crystal—!
Oh, god. Crystal.
I can't do this!
I pull away sharply, and I almost fall unexpectedly, because gravity is working differently upon me than it was on the bed.
That would be because currently I'm standing up, pressed close to Silver, though thankfully not as close as I had been mere moments ago. I'm in the living room, with boxes all around me, including one that is sitting somewhat out in the middle of the floor and looks like it would be all too easy to trip over.
The bedroom door remains closed.
Was it… all my imagination?
I turn and look wildly at my surroundings, trying to process. But… at least some of it had to be true, right? I mean, I had him pressed up a wall, not the other way around, so at the very least we made out. As for the rest…
It was all in my head. Thank god. But still, for me to think like that while kissing Silver is… not a good sign, to say the least.
Speaking of the redhead, he chooses this moment to clear his throat uncomfortably, and ask simply, "Gold?"
I slowly and stiffly turn around, more than a little afraid he might actually attack me – whether in the normal way, or the sexual one, I wasn't sure.
But when I turned fully to meet his gaze, I was glad to see the clearest expression showing was relief at having stopped. A feeling I'm sure echoed completely in my own eyes.
He flushes slightly and looks away, murmuring, "I'm glad you stopped. I… I was getting a little carried away."
He says, "carried away." What he very clearly means is… "not sure if he would've been able to stop of his own accord."
I accept his silent admission without pressing him about his true meaning, more than a little ashamed of how "carried away" I had gotten, myself. I turn my eyes up to the ceiling and hope I don't sound too hysterical when I say, "I, uh, don't think your plan worked, buddy."
He lets out a sound that to me seems like a cross between a snort of derision and contempt and a sigh of disappointment. "Oh, really?" he mumbles softly.
I chance a glance down at him and immediately the steamiest parts of our fantasy escapade flash through my mind in quick succession – with a few moments from our actual encounter thrown in for good measure.
Great. Like I needed a sequel to the bad porno movie I already have playing through my brain.
"Nope," I say, and congratulate myself when my voice doesn't waver, "definitely not."
It's at that moment that we both hear it: the unmistakable sound of keys jangling, and then fumbling with the front door.
We jump apart as if burned – even though technically we weren't doing anything anymore. We were still pretty conspicuously close, though. More accurately, Silver freezes, remaining rooted to his side of the room, while I leap away and sprint to the opposite wall.
This is the scene Blue walks in on. She comes in humming something – I only hear a few notes, but it sounds distinctly familiar. Like a song from a show I'd heard as a child. How did it go? I wanna be… the very best… that no one ever was... – and calls out a sing-song-y, "I'm home!" before stopping in confusion upon entering the living room.
She takes in first Silver, on one end of the room, and then me, at the other end, and smiles – though something about it strikes me as devious.
"Well, hello, Gold! What a pleasant surprise! I had no idea you'd be coming by! I hope I wasn't interrupting something…"
She definitely knows something.
"Um," I mutter, "interrupting something?"
She lets out a laugh – an evil laugh. A cackle, even – and says, "Oh, you know! It seems like you boys always have something going on that I get chastised for sticking my nose in. It's understandable. Girls do the same thing, always having private talks that guys aren't allowed to take part in. I can leave if you'd like."
Why do I get the feeling she's not just talking about talking?
I give a strained smile in return and reply, "Actually, I was just about to leave."
She gives a small, disappointed frown. "Oh, I did interrupt something. Please, don't leave on my account."
"That's just bad timing on your part," I object, "I really was just about to leave before you showed up. If anything, the presence of a pretty lady like you makes me want to stay."
It's so natural to slip back into the role of an incorrigible flirt. This has nothing to do with the need to reaffirm my sexuality after that little fantasy.
Nothing at all.
Really.
Besides, there's no harm done. Unless Silver acts on that killing intent I can feel from the glare directed at me that's boring through my skull.
"Oh, stop," Blue demurs, smiling coyly. "What would Crystal do if she heard you talking like that?"
Oh, yeah.
"She'd probably scream bloody murder at me, kick me in the shins really hard, and run home in tears," I answer, maybe a little too honestly.
Make that definitely too honestly. An awkward silence ensues as Blue searches in vain for a response to that, and I take a peek over my shoulder at Silver, who is giving me a decent five on the WTF-scale.
I rescue Blue by asking, "You went to see Yellow and Crys, right? How was that?"
Her smile returns instantly. "Oh, well actually, when I got there they had already left, so I decided to go shopping!"
The redhead behind me had been quiet up until now, but at this he lets out a groan and says, "Is that where your new necklace came from?"
Her smile widens. "Yep! I saw it in this cute little knickknack store, and it only costs ten dollars, so I thought, what a steal, right?"
He gave an expression that looked almost pained and simply murmured a "Yes" in return.
I take this as my cue to get the hell out of dodge. "And on that note…"
"Leaving so soon?" the shapely brunette pouts.
"Yeah, I think so. It's been fun, but I have to go home now. I've got things to do, people to see, you know the drill." I need a long shower. And even if she doesn't know what it's for, I really owe Crys an apology for everything I've done today.
Blue sighs and relents, "Well, okay. But feel free to come back anytime! You are always welcome here!" Concern about what she knows and/or thinks stings me once again as she sends Silver an extremely obvious "conspirational" wink. He in turn just lets out a low grumble and covers his face with his hand, muttering out a simple "Bye" in my direction.
I make it to the door, but then stop, one thing still bugging me immensely. On impulse, I turn around and head for the closed bedroom door, not caring what the two people in the room think.
"Uh, Gold?" Blue starts to ask.
I simply hold up a hand to silence her and open the door wordlessly, aware but for once unbothered by Silver's eyes glaring at me.
A tiny, single bed that can hardly fit one person, let alone two, sits innocuously in the room. I let loose a sigh of relief, though some of it dissipates when I notice a dresser eerily similar to the one in my fantasy nearby.
With a huge weight off my shoulders, I turn and come face to face with a glowering redhead. And I find that I am no longer impervious to the gravity of that stare.
Relief gone. Terror imminent.
"What exactly do you think you're doing?" he seethes, venom dripping from every word.
I try to play it off with a smile and whimper out, "Nothing?"
He glare intensifies, and he crosses his arms.
Danger! A powerful Boss approaches! Will you Aggress or Abscond?
"…Like I said, thishasbeenreallyfunandall, but Igottagobye!"
You abscond the hell out of there like pro, leaving one bemused fox and one furious - or perhaps embarrassed - maybe-friend in your wake.
*Intimacy 5 - This is a reference to the trope (from TV Tropes, which is an awesome site that everyone should visit and love) Level Up at Intimacy 5, which basically means you're directly rewarded somehow for having sex. So yeah, I realize I didn't use it correctly, but I fit it in there because it sounded good and I basically just wanted to reference TV Tropes, however incorrectly.
AN- Whew! So there's another chapter finished for you, and hopefully at not such a cliffhanger-y place so you don't all die waiting for the next chapter. I tried to make this one fairly long (and fairly sexy, even if it was mostly in Gold's head; I can't have much real content between him and Silver yet. Not until I've worked their relationship up to a believable point for it, since it's not going to go as easy and ideal as in Gold's head) to compensate for the wait (still less than 4000 words, woo!). But hopefully you guys found it satisfactory. I personally don't like it up until about where they actually start getting romantic (because, as Gold said, Silver is too wordy. Not to mention Gold's horribly handled freakout at the chapter opening). But what's important is if the readers liked it, not the picky author who criticizes her work more than anyone. Speaking of that, reviews are always loved and appreciated (I'll be honest and say it was while looking at this fic's popularity I decided to sit down and right an update for all the dedicated fans), especially when they give constructive criticism! See you next time! ^_^