Chapter 4

Hotch caught up to Emily and grabbed her wrist to make her stop. She tried to pull her wrist free from his grasp but he held it firmly in his grip.

"Emily, look at me."

She couldn't bring herself to do as he asked.

"Emily, please look at me. Please."

Emily heard something in the tone of his voice that made her look up and she saw reflected in his eyes what she had heard in his voice. Pain, there was actually pain in his eyes.

"Emily we all have scars. Some have physical scars and some have emotional scars. You and I have both, but it is how we choose to come through them that is important." He said as he watched her face.

"After Foyet stabbed me you were there for me in more ways than I can ever say. Let me be here for you. Do you see these?" He said and took her hand bringing it to his chest.

"These are not what define me as a person. Your scars do not define you either if anything they show how strong, resilient and very brave you are."

"Brave? I'm not brave Aaron. I did everything I did because I was scared not brave. Scared that Doyle would hurt or kill the people I love. I was scared for the team because you all are my family and he knew that and would do anything and everything he could to get to me. I was scared for you Aaron, for you and Jack. I did what I did to protect all of you because if anything were to happen to any of you it would have killed me and Doyle knew that too. But I wasn't brave, I should have come to you and told you about my past but I was too ashamed and embarrassed at what I had to do for the damn job."

Emily looked up at him with tears rolling down her cheeks.

"I couldn't face any of you and see the disgust in your eyes. I betrayed myself and everything I ever believed in to get a damn profile for a job. I betrayed all of you by not being honest with all of you. At the time when I ran, all I could think was how could I expect any of you to trust me after that. So I ran. I could not let Doyle get to you. I had to protect the only family I have ever really known. I was being selfish not brave."

"And you don't see that as being brave Emily? You ran to take him on all by yourself with no one to turn too. That is the bravest thing I have ever seen."

Taking her face in his hands he wiped the tears away with his thumbs.

"You are the bravest person I know. You would sacrifice yourself if it would save just one person. You always think of others first. Never have I ever seen you be selfish in anything you do."

Hotch looked into her eyes still holding her face in his hands. Dropping one hand to the scar on her stomach, he ran his fingers gently over it.

"You are a beautiful woman Emily and these here do not take away from that beauty."

Emily smiled up at him. "Thank you Aaron. Thank you for no turning your back on me when I came back. Thank you for everything you have done for me since I've been back."

She looked down at the sand beneath her feet for moment before raising her head to look up at him once again. "Walk back with me? It's getting dark and I want to take a shower and relax a bit."

"Of course, I want to get cleaned up too. And Emily you don't have to thank me for anything. We help the people we care about without question." He said as they started to walk back towards the house.

Hotch took Emily's hand in his linking their fingers together and Emily laid her head over on Hotch's shoulder. They walked back without saying anything, content with the silence for now.

Everyone else had separated to their own rooms to relax for the evening. Rossi was standing out on the balcony to his room sipping on his scotch when he noticed Hotch and Emily coming back into view. Hand in hand with her head resting on his shoulder. 'Well look at that.' He thought to himself as he stepped back into the shadows so they wouldn't see him, and he watched them.

Hotch stopped them on the patio and turned to Emily, taking her face in his hands.

"Remember what I said Emily. These don't define who you are." He said as he brushed the back of his knuckles across the four leaf clover branded over her heart. "They don't make you any less beautiful. They may be a part of you now but they don't make you. What's in here is what is important." He said as he patted over her heart lightly.

"To me they show exactly how strong and brave you are. If you let this eat away at you then you let him win. Even though he's dead he till wins, don't let him win sweetie. You fought so hard to this far don't let him beat you now."

All Emily could do was stare at him, listening to what he was saying.

"You take that pain, that fire burning in you and you fight. Turn that fire into something to fight for; you're worth fighting for Emily."

Emily threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you Aaron."

"I told you Emily, we help the people we care about." He said pulling her closer still.

"Now let's get inside and get cleaned up." Saying as he turned them and walked in the house with arm draped over Emily's shoulder hugging her to him.

Dave stepped out of the shadows smiling widely turning to go back into his room thinking 'very promising indeed.'

Emily stepped out of the shower reaching for a towel realizing that the shelf was empty. She opened the bathroom door hiding behind it she peaked out.

"Hotch?"

"Yeah."

"Could you please get me a towel, there aren't any in here. I could have sworn there were some in here this afternoon."

"Yeah hang on a minute. Don't go anywhere." He smiled at her flashing those breath stopping dimples at her.

"Ok smartass, where the hell am I gonna go like this." She laughed back at him.

Hotch came back a few minutes later with a stack of towels and wash cloths.

"Em? Here you go." He said as he knocked on the door.

Emily poked her head back around the door then pulled it open hiding behind it.

"Just set them on the counter and I'll put them up."

Hotch set them down and went back to sit on the bed. He lay back resting his head on the pillow and waited for Emily to get through in the bathroom.

Emily got dressed pulling on a red lace thong, black tank top and matching sleep shorts. She brushed her hair and then brushed her teeth before leaving the bathroom.

Hotch heard the bathroom door open and lifted his head up off the pillow to see her walk out.

'God she is so beautiful.' He thought as his eyes flowed over her body, taking it in and locking it to his memory sure that it would fuel his fantasies from now on. What he wouldn't do to feel her under him as he moved in and out of her.

"It's all yours Aaron." she said.

"What?" he snapped out of his train of thought. 'Did she just tell me that that was all mine, dear god?'

As if she could read his mind she almost blurted out 'it could be' but instead she said "The bathroom, it's all yours."

"Oh, yeah right thanks" He could feel the heat rise in his face. 'Damn, does she know what I thought she was talking about?'

Hotch got up and grabbed his clothes off the foot of the bed and went into the bathroom shutting the door behind him. He leaned back against the door taking deep breaths trying to control his rapidly beating heart.

Fifteen minutes later Hotch came out of the bathroom wearing only a white t-shirt and a pair of dark blue boxers. Emily had already climbed between the sheets on her bed and she watched him walk out her breath catching in her throat at the sight of him.

Hotch glanced at the clock seeing it was already 10:50. He looked over at Emily where she lay looking at him.

"You ready to go to sleep?"

"Yeah it's been a long day and I don't know how much longer I can keep my eyes open." She replied with a yawn.

Hotch walked over and leaned down and kissed her on the forehead.

"Goodnight Em."

Goodnight Aaron."