He truly despised his reaction to watching Thor and Jane holding hands. He sat in front of his window, attempting to answer some emails, but really thinking about how he could curb the violence of his response. He would need to get used to it, at any rate.

Loki thought about how, a few years ago, he would have simply won Jane over. He wouldn't have given it any thought whatsoever. He desired her, he would have her. Old Loki would not have been bothered by such a trifle as "his brother's fiancee."

Trifle, indeed.

But now, now he cared…and he hated that he did.

But he also believed that Jane wouldn't have given one whit for him if he didn't care. Perhaps he wouldn't be attracted to her, either.

No…there was no doubt that Loki had changed. He changed so much that he hardly could claim to be the same person he was a few years ago. He changed so much that he honestly wanted the best for Jane Foster, even if the best for her wasn't the best for him.

Love. Humph.

He finished his email and thought that he should, in fact, go see his brother. It wouldn't do to hang about idly, waiting for Frigga to text him. He didn't have the patience for her texts, anyway.

It was late…he had spent a good deal of time that afternoon on work; work, which he would be returning to in a week's time. Well, physically, anyway. Part of him was always working. The other part was spent these days masturbating to the vision of Jane Foster…her sweet voice and laugh…her smile…

God, he was beginning to annoy himself. And right on cue, his erection made an appearance.

No matter, he would ignore that along with everything else he was currently ignoring. If he wasn't careful, he might end up in real trouble…like, getting angry at traffic lights or something and choosing to ignore them. Wretched things.

He laughed at his silliness and put his coat on. He would go and see his brother, and congratulate him on his impending nuptials.

Then he'd likely go and vomit again.

No. No he wouldn't. He would contain himself…he had been ill probably from the adrenaline following the argument with Odin, the shock at Thor's defense of him. The fact that he had shown affection to Jane was merely the straw that broke the camel's back, as it were.

…and the image swam in front of his mind's eye…Jane looking at Thor lovingly, Thor squeezing her hand…and he felt ill once more.

Blast this love business! He was walking down the street, scowling. Damn it all, anyway! Did everyone experience such violent reactions this way?

He thought that if he should ask Frigga or Thor, they would tell him that he was merely passionate, and that he shouldn't be too concerned.

But he wouldn't be telling Frigga or Thor. He would be keeping this to himself.

Well, save Heimdall…that insolent cur. Clearly he was making a move on Jane…making a move, when he knew how he felt! Who invites him everywhere, anyway? Why is he always hanging about?

He walked into the elevator.

Pressed "3", and thought about how earlier in the day, he had been there with Jane…

The lights dimmed in the elevator. And quite suddenly, Jane Foster was there with him. She was wearing all red, red lipstick…she looked much like she had on Christmas, when he nearly kissed her under the mistletoe…

"Loki," she cooed.

"Jane…" he swallowed.

She slunk to the numbers and hit the red "emergency" button.

"But…they'll come…" he protested. But Jane was in front of him, her hands on his chest, unbuttoning his overcoat, his shirt…

"Not before you do, Loki…" and she kissed him, hard.

Over and over the kiss lazed on…

"Sir?"

"Hmm?" Loki snapped out of his reverie.

"Are you getting out?" the orderly was outside of the elevator, watching Loki inside, appearing lost or confused…maybe he wasn't getting out. "Um…mental health is on floor six, sir."

"I'm not crazy, thank you," and he left the elevator, adjusting his pants to disguise his erection once more. He felt like he was going through a second puberty.

Maybe that was something he should look into…maybe a second puberty was a thing…

Great. He was using her idiotic terminology in his mind.

He walked over to 307 to find Thor sitting up, playing with his food dish. It looked horrifying.

"What is that grey matter?" Loki asked, walking over to Thor's sick bed.

"Don't even suggest that it's some poor animal's brain."

"No. Nothing alive could have produced that," and Loki sat.

Thor smiled and sat back. "Well, Loki. What brings you by?"

"You owe me fifty dollars."

"I do?" he appeared to be confused. "I don't recall ever asking you for money…you wouldn't have given me anyway…Odin, on the other hand…"

"Stop, Thor," he laughed. "Just checking your amnesia."

"Oh. Well. It appears I only have forgotten Jane," he sighed. "Leave it to me to forget my fucking fiancee."

Loki smirked at that, and he dropped his gaze.

"How well do you know her?" Thor asked, his voice slicing the silence.

"I…" he cleared his throat. Quite well, but not so well as I should like to. "I know her well enough."

"Did you meet her before the accident?"

"No."

"So your knowledge came after you knew we were engaged?"

"That's right," he looked at Thor quizzically. "To what do these questions tend?"

"I…" he cleared his throat. "I don't know her at all, Loki…I want to know her."

Jesus. Loki wanted to run out of the room right then and there. He fiddled with the buttons on his coat. He took it off and finally looked at his brother. "What do you wish to know?"

Thor sat back and looked at the ceiling…"I want to know her favorite film. Her favorite season…what she looks like when no one is watching her…I want to know if she likes spaghetti…what are her fears?"

"She prefers Kotex over other brands of tampons."

"Excuse me?"

Loki laughed. "Nothing…these are rather ridiculous and overly romantic questions for her brother in law, wouldn't you say?" Though he did know that Jane used Kotex. He saw one in her bag at dinner.

Thor laughed now. "Alright. Why don't you just tell me what you know about her."

Loki sighed. This was awkward. "Jane is…" he paused. "She is…" he swallowed. "Well. I know her to be thoughtful and aware. She is extremely bright and intuitive. She takes her work seriously, but knows how to have fun. She is a bit sarcastic. She loves pasta. She loves red wine. She likes herself in the color red, sometimes black, but never lighter than pale blue. She is eloquent in her speech, but still uses common idioms. She is passionate…she is a warm presence in everything she touches…"

Fuck. That might have been too much.

He looked at Thor. "Thor?"

"Loki!"

He jumped. "What is it?"

"That was beautiful!"

Loki smiled. "Well…"

"No! It was. She is a gem, then?"

He looked away, out the window. "That she is."

If Loki had been facing his brother, he would have seen a confused look grace his countenance. "I suppose, yet again, I didn't appreciate what I had. I need to see to that, Loki."

"I have had the good fortune of seeing to that downfall, Thor," and he crossed his legs, looking at him once more. "It makes for a miserable existence, to always desire more…to always lament what one doesn't have," he cleared his throat. But he did…he did lament what he didn't have. "It would do you some good to begin to appreciate that which you do," he paused. "Thor, thank you, for earlier. For saying those things to Odin."

He smiled. "Well, it was no trouble on my part."

"No. But it meant a great deal to me. I always thought that you didn't care about how I felt. But I might have…" he paused, and looking down, continued. "Been mistaken."

"No. You weren't," he laughed. "I thought you very selfish and angry, Loki. Angry for no good reason other than the fact that you weren't me."

Loki started at this, but Thor continued, undaunted. "Let me finish. I was selfish. I reveled in Odin's attention. And I laughed at you. But that was very wrong, Loki. Very, very wrong. You are my brother, and I love you."

He smiled. "It is painfully clear to me now just how hard you hit that head of yours."

Thor responded with a smile. "So…what have you been up to?"

"The usual."

"No…no I don't think so. Something has happened to you, Loki."

"I don't know what you mean…" he swallowed.

Thor's face betrayed a smirk. "Any ladies you've been hanging around catch your eye? You are rather discriminating…"

His stomach fell. His eyes grew wide. His heart sped up at the insinuation he heard in his brother's voice. "I mean…that is…"

"Hey Thor, Loki…"

And Loki stood so fast that he felt light headed and immediately sat down again. Jane Foster ran to his side. His mouth was dry. He was dizzy.

"Are you alright?" Jane was holding his shoulder, looking intently at him.

His hand was at his face. "Fine," he managed. Was that his voice which cracked so wretchedly? "Stood up too quickly."

"Have you eaten anything since lunch?" Jane pulled a chair over to him and sat.

He looked at her. My god, she is beautiful. And the way in which she looks at me…it's almost as if she really does care…he swallowed. Of course she cares. It's who she is, and we are friends. "I haven't."

"Well, we should get something into you, then…" she smiled.

I could get something into you… And he both smiled at his private innuendo and chastised himself for it. "I'm fine, Jane," he looked at her hand, still on his arm. She must have kept it there, returned it to his arm even after she sat down.

"No you aren't," Jane stood, taking Loki with her. "Come on. I'll go with you."

"Jane?" Thor's voice interrupted them.

She looked at Thor.

"I'd…I was wondering if I could have a word…"

"Oh," dammit Jane, that wasn't a suitable response for your fake fiancee. "Um…yeah. Of course…" she turned to Loki. "Do you mind?"

Yes. "No. Not at all," and he left.

"So," she clapped her hands and sat down. "What's up?"

"Jane…you know that I don't recall anything about you."

"Yeah…"

"Yes. But I would like to see to that."

Shit. "Ok?"

"So…perhaps we can begin now."

"I…"

"You hesitate. What are your concerns?"

Jane fumbled with her jacket, and took it off. "Well, I mean…nothing really." Only that we aren't engaged. "But, you know Thor…" she sighed heavily. "Our relationship wasn't exactly what I think people think it was."

"No?"

"No. And I mean…I liked you and all…but we weren't that close. Not really."

Thor's turn to sigh.

"So…maybe. Maybe we can just…"

"Jane Foster."

"Yeah?"

He swung his legs over the bed and stood up.

"Oh my God, Thor! Be careful!" she ran to his side, his hospital gown precariously open in the back, revealing his naked backside. Jane was trying desperately not to look.

"Jane," and he fell to one knee.

And her mouth fell open.

He took her hand. "My entire family loves you. You have changed everything! I might as well love you too. Will you marry me?"

…and then all went black…

"Jane!"

"Jane…?"

"She's dead."

"She isn't dead, mother. She fainted."

"Jane Foster! Wake up!"

"Open your eyes, Jane," and with those words, uttered by that voice, she did.

All around her were Odinson's. They were all looking down on her, faces full of concern. "Oh my god," she began, sitting up and holding her head. "Oh my god…"

"Are you alright, dear?" and Frigga took her hand to help her up.

"I'm fine."

"What happened?" asked Heimdall.

"She took one look at Thor's bare ass and decided to put their engagement under review," said Loki.

"Not funny, brother," came Thor's voice from the bed.

They all stood back to give her room. Jane swayed a bit, then sat in a chair. "I'm sorry…I've never fainted before."

"Well, if one decides to go for a trial run on first-time fainting, a hospital is truly the best venue for such an experiment. Well done, Jane," and he handed her a glass of water.

"Thanks," she replied, taking the glass.

"What did you do to her, Thor?" Odin was looking on, a bit of a scowl on his face.

"Nothing! I proposed!" Thor was put out.

"Brother, if your second proposal sets your fiancee into a faint, what do you suppose the marriage bed will do?" and Loki winked at Thor. There. Making light. No one will suspect a thing.

Thor clapped his hands and laughed a booming laugh.

"Loki! Will you please!"

"Oh, calm yourself, mother," he paused. "Can I get you a cab, Jane?"

"That'd be great, thanks," she smiled meekly.

Loki nodded, rose, and taking out his phone, went to the window to call the cab.

Jane was mortified. How could she faint? "I'm so…so sorry…"

"It must have been my romantic proposal, Jane," but he was smiling.

And she blushed and hung her head once more. "I guess so. But then again, I haven't eaten either."

"Cab is outside, Jane. Can I walk you?" Loki was approaching her.

"Yes," she whispered. "I'll see you all later," she smiled around.

The pair went to the elevator without speaking.

And descended without a word.

Out into the chill of late December air they went…"Thanks, Loki."

He nodded, and went to leave, but was suddenly prevented. He looked at Jane, who was staring at him intently, fingers wrapped around his coat sleeve. "Would you mind…could you see me home? I'm sorry. I'm not usually like this…"

He swallowed, then nodded. "Of course."

They clambered into the cab. Night was falling, and the chill had rose. Jane looked out of the window and sighed. "I feel like such an idiot."

"Why?"

"Because I fainted." And for many, many other things…none of which I can really get into without making you hate me forever.

"But if you hadn't, how could I have helped you obtain a cab, or see you home?"

Jane looked at him, and he was smiling sweetly.

"We have many years to look forward to, Jane. It will be wonderful for you to be part of the family," he paused. "In an official capacity."

Jane nodded. They were outside of her apartment. "Thank you so much, Loki…" and she leaned over to him…

He almost turned his head to claim her mouth, but allowed her chaste peck on the cheek instead, and felt his heart swell…wait. Was that his heart swelling…? Blast! "Goodnight, Jane."

She nodded, then a look ran across her face.

"What is it?" Loki asked.

"Well…I only just realized. I didn't tell him yes," and she got out of the cab.

Loki sat there a moment, watching her walk to her building…and he gave the driver his home address.