"I didn't know you sing." I looked up from the hammock that I was rocking Lily to sleep in and up to the doorway of my quarters where Darren was leaning. I smiled weakly. "I usually don't." I murmured. I stood up slowly to make sure I wouldn't awaken Lily and walked over to Darren. He stared at me and frowned. "How long has it been since you've fed?" he asked me. I sighed and rubbed my temples, looking at Lily.
"Not since we left the Cirque. No one would be able to watch her while I went to feed." I sighed. He frowned. "Oh…well, I, um…" he blushed lightly and scratched the back of his head. "I don't know, want to go get a drink?" he asked. I smiled and nodded. "Yeah, that'd be nice. I haven't talked to you in a long time." I said. He grinned and led me to the hall where the food was kept and served.
Darren told me to get take a seat as he went to get us mugs of blood and bowls of bat broth. I smiled as he placed the warm food in front of me. "Thank you." I smiled. He waved it away with his hand. "So…how have you been?" He asked me. I smiled. "Pretty good, I guess." I said before taking a sip of blood. Darren leaned over the table so that he was closer to me.
"Vanessa, it's me. You don't have to put up any walls around me and pretend everything's okay." He said quietly. I bit my lip and looked down at my broth, my fists clenching and unclenching on the table. I watched rippled form in the broth as my eyes released tears that rolled down and fell from my cheeks.
"I couldn't save them, Darren. I couldn't save them and Brandon…he's…" I shook my head and covered my face with my hands. "Vanessa…there was nothing you could do. How were you supposed to know that Gannen would be laying in wait for you? Hey, look at me." He said quietly, taking my hands. I looked up at him, sniffling. "You did what you could and you saved Lily." He said. I nodded.
"I just wish I could have saved them all…" I whispered hoarsely. "I couldn't save any of them." I said, squeezing my eyes shut. "Vanessa, you cannot save everyone, and it is okay. No one expects you too." A soft voice from behind me said. My eyes snapped open. "I couldn't even save my own flesh and blood." I said, turning to look Mr. Crepsley in the eyes. I could see the hurt flash in his eyes. I bit my lip. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean…" I trailed off. He shook his head. "It is okay, I know how upset you are." He said.
I nodded. "Is Seba still around?" I asked, changing the subject. Mr. Crepsley nodded. "Yes, you can go to him later on. Now, you must finish your food and drink then rest." He said. I frowned. "I can't, what if they make a decision on Lily and I'm not awake and they take her away from me?" I asked, my voice raising an octave.
"I'll go with you and watch her while you sleep, I'll wake you once they make a decision." Darren said. I smiled at him and nodded. "Okay." I said quietly. He smiled. "Cool, now drink that." He said, pointing at my mug. I rolled my eyes and did as instructed. Mr. Crepsley raised a brow at us. "Did something happen between you two?" he asked. I laughed softly. "Oh, not at all, Larten." I said with a smile. He smiled back.
I stayed for a long while, talking to my mentor about what had been going on while I was gone, and what had happened to me and what had happened with Darren. "Oh, you met Vancha?" I asked him. He nodded. "He really does have a striking resemblance to Gannen." He said. I nodded. "That he does." I yawned. Mr. Crepsley chuckled. "Vanessa, you need to get some sleep. You have not slept in days, go rest." He said before standing up. Darren and I stood as well and the three of us walked to the doorway together. Larten hesitated and then pulled me into a tight hug. I hugged him back, enjoying the embrace. He kissed the top of my head and whispered in my ear. "Goodnight, my dear." He then gave me one last squeeze and walked in the opposite direction, off to Seba's quarters no doubt. The walk back to my room was a long one, long enough for Darren and me to carry out a decent conversation.
"So…my dear?" Darren asked, raising a brow at me. I rolled my eyes. "Yes, that's what he always called me until you came along." I yawned. He frowned. "Oh." He said. I looked at him. "What?" I asked. He frowned. "Did I ruin something? Were you two…?" he trailed off. My eyes widened. "Oh dear god, no. Darren, Steve was my first everything." I said. he didn't seem to happy about that comment either. "I'm sorry…. I keep messing everything up." I muttered as we came to the doorway of my room. He shook his head. "It's fine, it's in the past and what has happened, happened." He said. I nodded and looked into the room, watching Lily's deep breathing as she lay asleep in my hammock.
"This must have been what my mother felt like when I was first discovered." I muttered. Darren looked at me. "Discovered you?" he repeated. I nodded. "Yeah, I had been living here in Vampire Mountain for five years secretly until I was discovered." I said. "What happened then?" He asked me. I sighed. "I was almost executed." I said quietly. I saw Darren stiffen. "What?" Why would they do that?" he gasped. I shrugged. "I'm unnatural; they didn't know what to do with me. I'm a morphling, a bender, and a full blooded vampire. I could bring destruction down on the clan with a snap of my fingers." I said quietly.
"Don't say that." Darren said. I looked into his eyes. "It's true. But, luckily, Larten came for me." I said, smiling to myself. "I remember the first few months. God, I don't know how he put up with me." I chuckled. Darren smiled. "You grow on people." He said. I rolled my eyes and yawned again. "I'm sorry, I'm keeping you up." He said gently. I shook my head. "It's fine. I think I'll go to sleep now though." I muttered. He nodded. I hesitated and bit my lip.
"I…um…you can come join me if you'd like." I said, blushing. Darren's face heated up as he nodded and followed me into my room. I pulled off my cut offs and looked up at Darren. "Does this bother you?" I asked. He stared and shook his head. "No, it doesn't." he said quietly. I nodded and turned to open my coffin as Darren took off his shirt. He climbed in before me and pulled me in, holding me close.
"Wow." I whispered. "Hm?" he asked and he rubbed my shoulder with his thumb in a circular motion. "This is what I've been missing out on all these years." I said. He laughed softly. "Better late than never." He said. I nodded and yawned. "Goodnight, Darren." I whispered. "Goodnight, love." He replied. I smiled and I knew then that that was how I would awake; smiling and in the arms of the one I love.