Ahhh, it's great to be back... now its time to kill myself again. I can't believe this time last year I was stressing over one main exam and now I have five -six since I have to do two exams for Maths FUDGEYOUMATHEMATICS- to freak out about in exactly a month. And how have I made my time productive? By doing absolutely nothing. KILL ME NOW!

Anyhoos before I kill myself over an overdose of icecream, here is the more-than-one-year-and-a-few-days long awaited chappie. Now let's *laughs* dance *'Blow' plays in the background*

Disclaimer: Like I could own this series when I literally have forty cents in my jeans pocket, so see previous chappies.

Why are you reading this pointless crap for? READ NOW NOW NOW NOW! P.S. - long chappie once again... couldn't resist :P NOW READ READ READ READ

"Ah, so her highness of hotness admits that I, the Puckmeister has a toned muscly bod?"

"I swear to God, when we get out of this room, you better run fast, because I will literally castrate you to death."

"Well you better catch me fast, because other ladies wanna get a piece of this badboy… unless you are jealous, is that why you want me to run from you, so you could have me to yourself? You should've just asked, I would have agreed to it."

"They can have you for all I care, you simpleton, idiot, jackass, nitwit, dumbass, motherfucking oaf, jerk, punce-"

"Don't hide your true emotions for me babe, you are either blushing, or are green with envy."

Rachel groaned and began slamming her forehead on the table. She would rather do this for the rest of her life then endure everything that was going on around her. She hated Noah Puckerman, she hated not getting her way, she hated Noah Puckerman, she hated any other slushie flavour that wasn't grape, she extremely hated Noah Puckerman to the brink… did she mention how much she hated the boy with the mowed-lawn mohawk?

Puck, however, had a completely different view on the matter. He liked his encounters with the diva. Well obviously, he was pretty much the one who would always get her riled up and an argument between them would occur. He liked to torture her through their bickers, it was pretty much the only thing they had in common, the only way that he could get close to her, to talk to her. The more vocab she used towards him that he didn't understand made him want to argue with her more, mainly as she was one of the few girls to have a decent conversation with.

Even if it meant trading flirty phrases to her, and in return getting large words he didn't understand –sometimes profanity– from her. The cycle of life, and he liked it.

"Nawww sweetheart, don't you worry your pretty little head. Just keep thinking about the hot answers you fill out on the sheet," Puck stated, smirk present. Oh how Rachel wanted to shoot a missile on his face if it was the only way to get that damn smirk to be gone for one second.

"Please, please, please jump off a cliff and die," she mumbled.

"Can't do that babe, you would miss me," Puck retorted, eyeing the petite brunette for her comeback.

She stopped banging her head on the table to glare at him with her doe-eyed orbs of vision. "The only thing I would miss if you did jump is nothing."

"Oh come on, no you wouldn't. Wouldn't you have some sort of feeling inside of you to jump off the cliff to be with me?"

"No, not really."

"What if it was that vampire douchebag?"

"What does the Twilight series have anything to do with this?"

"It has everything to do with it Berry."

"We weren't even talking about it in the first place!"

"What if it was that werewolf freak?"

"You mean Jacob Black? I'll admit he has a very fit physique, and is quite charming in a mysterious way."

"Excuse me? My real, pure guns can beat his blown-up bags any day. And I have some quality badass shit that can take down his… whatever it is he has."

"Do you care about anything that doesn't revolve around you?"

"Of course I do! I care about people… that will get smashed if they don't get out of my way."

While the duo shouted retorts at the other for the umpteenth time, at the teacher's desk Sue was at her wits trying to solve a crossword puzzle in her magazine. How the hell was she supposed to know the answer to this? What was she, a teacher?

Clearly she was, but… shut up. Moving on.

"What's a twelve-lettered word for 'a hideous and atrocious attraction'?" She thought about this for a while, processing words that could fit the phrase's description. A tiny smile formed on her phizog, writing down the letters that seemed to match the clue given.

"William's hair."

"Oh my holy water."

"Unbelievable."

"Did she just insult my hair?"

"Will!"

"What? She has got to find a hobby that doesn't have anything to do with insulting my hair!"

"She already has a hobby… destroying the Glee club."

"…Good point."

"Sorry to interrupt your love-fest, but I'm sort of interested in watching a different kind of love-fest that is taking place in the room next door."

Will and Emma turned their heads to the Latina cheerleader, oblivious to their stares while filing her nails. After getting a feeling that someone was staring at her, she glanced up and saw their expressions. "No offence," she blandly added.

Before the duo could speak, they got interrupted once again. "None taken," Kurt spoke for the both of them. "Now please shove loves, we're missing the show."

"Hold on guys," Will began to say, blocking their view on purpose. "Are you guys saying that me and Miss. Pillsbury have some sort of a romantic relationship?"

"Not this again," Mercedes groaned.

"Mr. Schue, if I may to cut this short," Quinn piped out next to Finn. "The whole school gave you two a name – Wemma. And just like Puck and Man-hands inside, it's not that hard to see something going on between the two of you."

"Great speech from preggers, now lets get on with the show," Santana quickly applauded, before making her way to the window at the door to watch their desired audience.

"Wait," Emma stepped next to Will, blocking the rest of the Glee club's view once again. "How long has this been going on for?"

Groan.

Santana was annoyed with her teacher's questions up to the point where she mentally declared that the first thing she saw she would throw – which happened to be Kurt's beloved hat. She rolled her eyes at his antics as he tried to fix the bowler into place, glaring at her in the process. "Did you drink testosterone by accident Santana? Katy could've got injured from your throw."

"For the last time Kurt, it's just a damn hat," Mercedes bellowed at her friend.

Kurt shook his head; Mercedes clearly had no idea what kind of crap she had just said. "It's not just a hat 'Cedes. You don't understand the kind of emotional connection I have with her."

"Speaking of emotional connection, can we please get back to Puck and Rachel?" Artie questioned, sitting patiently in his wheelchair although his expression in his faced showed how frustrated he was with the change of focus.

"A-a-ar-tie's rig-ght," Tina stuttered from behind. "We ca-ame out o-o-of class j-ju-ust f-fo-or thi-is, so le-let's ju-ju-jus-ust shu-shu-ut up!"

Mike eyed Tina confused. "I thought you only stuttered in public… you know, when you're not with the Glee club."

Tina's orbs widened. "Whoops, you're right. I'm used to stuttering in front of everyone."

Mike smiled at Tina, who in turn blushed, which everyone had noted.

However, the moment had to be ruined.

Santana began clapping, very pissed off. "Okay congrats female Asian, you've stopped stuttering. It's a miracle, hip hip hurray." She turned to Kurt, who was still shooting daggers at her for tossing his precious Katy. "Fashionista, I could give you a million and five reason why you shouldn't wear that hat, but I have a serious case of CBF so I won't even bother, and Wemma," she directed her attention towards the two adults. "I don't want to show my inner bitchy Latina side but please shove your butts out of my goddamn way!"

Normally, Will would've told her off for cursing, but he got used to the Latina's fiery side. She was just like Puck, except female, which frightened him in a way. One Puck was enough as it was but two… and a girl that acted like him no less, was just horrible to think… and it might just work. "Fine," Will proclaimed, motioning for his students to see the door. With smiles on their faces, they all rushed to get first dibs to observe the action they came to see to begin with until they were interrupted by their teacher and the student councilor.

Again.

"Until you tell Miss. Pillsbury and myself when this Wemma phenomenon began."

Cue another groan.

"How are my hands my best assets?"

"Hey! No peeking!"

"Just answer my question!"

"First I wrote everything which you got pissed at, then I changed it to your ass which you got pissed at, and then I change it again to boobs which you got pissed at again, and before it was changed to legs, and now you are pissed at my answer for this? There is just no way of pleasing your tight ass."

"Are you trying to imply that I have a pole up my bottom?"

"Well, since you're the one who said it in the first place…"

"Troglodyte."

"Speaka da English!"

"That was in English!"

"And so is voulez-vous coucher avec moi se soir."

Rachel felt her skull was close to breaking for her to grab her brain and destroy that to pieces, which was how much Puck affected her. A major part of her believed he had an impact on her in a negative way, but a teensy weensy piccoleeny part considered his impact on her was a good thing. But there was no way in the name of Barbra Streisand's name would she admit that out loud, more or less to the said twat next to her. "You do know that highly inappropriate phrase translated is do you want to sleep with me tonight?"

After seeing a cheeky grin growing on his face, she knew she couldn't take back her words. "I didn't know you thought that way you cheeky minx, but since you asked me… I'm all game."

Goddammit, she mused a frustrated thought. "Will you just shut your trap for one minute?"

"Only if your luscious plump lips are pressed to mine babe," he replied back, his hazel eyes somehow focused on her lips. This didn't go unnoticed by Rachel, who felt her cheeks begin to redden.

To avoid showing him he was succeeding in this battle, she turned away from him, trying to focus her attention on the dating questionnaire sheet, but failing miserably. "You never give up with your conquests do you?"

"You say it like I'm something you want but cannot have," she heard him mumble.

She turned around, surprised at his words. "I thought that was why you kept on pursuing me."

"Your one hot, sexy chick. Who wouldn't want to do you five times over on top of a piano?"

Everything goes downhill once his ego down there takes over. "You perverted pig. Now shut the hell up and don't talk to me."

"But-"

"No."

Surprisingly, Puck obliged to Miss. Berry's orders. Say that she got him whipped to his face, find a mirror quickly while running for your life because that would be the last time you would ever see your face structured that way.

Despite the fact she was the one that wanted silence to begin with, she had to open her mouth. Rachel Berry does not do silence, even if her only companion –apart from the cheerleading coach at the teacher's desk– was an idiot with a hideous haircut. "You never answered my question," she whispered. It made her wonder if he even heard that.

"The one about you being uptight for having a pole wedged between your ass?" Puck asked innocently, although Rachel knew that he knew which question she was referring to.

"Not that question, but I would like to say I am not uptight."

"Whatever floats your boat."

"As I was saying," Rachel raised her voice slightly, just for him to shut up, and for the attention to be on her this time. "You never answered my question."

"I don't want to answer it," she heard him murmur, noting how his perception was at anything but her. Well this was bloody amazing news… was he blushing?

A smirk began to grace her features. "Is Noah Puckerman nervous?"

A scoff escaped his mouth. "Puckermans don't do nervous babe," he assured her while facing her again, crossing his arms across his chest to prove his point by showing his bulky arms and giving out a scowl.

"Then why won't you answer my question?"

"Why do you ask so many questions?"

"Puck…"

"No way would the way you said my name like that would convince me to tell you why, although you should say my name like that everytime I-"

"Puck, please don't ruin a good moment. Please tell me why."

Rachel heard him sigh, thinking he was stubborn like her and not give a response, until she heard him utter, "Soft hands."

"I'm sorry?" She heard him crystal clear, but needed more clarification.

"Soft hands, you have soft hands," he repeated. Seeing her chocolate eyes twinkle, he continued. "From what I've heard from Finnessa, he kept on saying something about how soft your hands were, even when they are cold. But for all I know he could have been bullshitting with me, or making some lameass shit up. You know how dumbo he is."

Although the ending was ruined especially with Puck's cussing, Rachel was touched. Finn said that about her? Not that she cared, she was annoyed. She had this uber massive crush on him probably ever since Desperate Housewives had first started airing, and that was the only thing he would talk about in reference to her? She was very glad that she realized she had been chasing after the wrong guy when her perfect guy was next to her.

Wait, what?

"Wait, what?" she repeated, not believing what her inner monologue was trying to convince to her.

"I know you're still hung up on Finn and all, but how can you not see what a dumbass he is! Just last week he texted me if I knew what my number was… my number! He texted me for my number! Sometimes I just want to kill him; I'm doing everyone a favour by destroying his existence!" By now, Puck was drawing a stick figure of Finn on his questionnaire sheet and stabbing his pen all over the drawing. Poor drawing.

"Stop hurting the illustration," Rachel said, rolling her eyes at his behaviour as he stabbed the pen multiple times through stick figure Finn's chest and the pen went through the paper.

"Never! I'm making it feel my pain, my pain!" Puck was now full of rage, pretty much decided to rip the whole questionnaire sheet altogether.

Rachel had seen Puck go apeshit crazy one too many times. She felt bad about the time when she saw Puck throw his lunchbox at Mike because he wouldn't trade lunches with him and didn't intervene. But yet again, they were freaking eight years old, so that didn't count.

"Puck stop!" Rachel roared, throwing the pen grasped firmly in his hand and placing her hands on top of his in an attempt to calm him down. "Just calm down. Breathe in, breathe out; breathe in, breathe out."

"I'm not gonna do that therapy shit-"

"Just do it!"

One again, Puck followed her orders, inhaling and exhaling while waiting for her to continue speaking. "I don't like Finn anymore. Well I like him as a friend, but not in the same way as I used to. You should learn to control your anger problems; you have hurt many people both physically and emotionally as a result of your actions."

"Like who?" he smirked, waiting for a list to come out of her skirt pocket with everyone's name written down.

"Me," she mouthed, glancing down at her lap, but Puck saw her lips move.

His smirk died down to a grim line. It pained him to know he did all those terrible things to her, and yet he was making her life even more of a living hell by flirting with her. If he could change back time and undo all those times he threw slushies at her, and hit the old him in the ball sack, he would. He took his hands out of her grasp and took hers in his instead. "I really am sorry for that. I'm not sorry for slushing those other losers, but I'm sorry I did that to you. I don't know why I did it, but I really am sorry. I don't think I can ever express how sorry I am."

"You know that I can forgive but I will never forget," Rachel stated sadly.

"I know I know I know, but," Puck's orbs gazed into her mocha eyes, boring his apologies through his eyes. If he couldn't say it in words, maybe he could express it through his orbs of vision. He never considered it, but Rachel's eyes were a lovely shade of brown. Always full of life, admiration, twinkling, and looking into them made you feel the happiest you had ever been, like now for him.

For Rachel, she felt something just by looking into his eyes. She assumed it was lust, but closer inspection made her realize there was no trace of that evident in those hazel eyes. It wasn't love, as harsh as it might be to say out loud, she believed that term wasn't featured in Puck's dictionary. But there was something there, a mixture of other emotions she had never seen present on the young man in front of her, and she wanted to break down the walls he had built to hide from, just to find them and release them. Rachel already knew she was losing her mind, but she could've sworn she heard someone shout, "Just fuck each other already!"

Having the decency to actually find out who cursed those horrible words, she tried to move out of her seat, only to find out she was tugged forward by Puck still holding her small hands in his large ones. When she twirled around in her seat, she was closer to him than before, and she wanted to move more closely towards him. But at the same time, she didn't want to break eye contact with the mohawked teen; his eyes were just intoxicating and hypnotizing to not turn away from.

As usual, those rare moments never last long.

"Yo, Joey and Pacey," they heard Sue shout in their direction.

Puck banged his fist on the table, breaking eye contact with Rachel to shoot daggers at the cheerleading coach. If looks could kill, he would've blown Sue up seventeen and a half times already. Rachel had to grab his hand again to calm him down, and so he wouldn't get up and strange Sue.

"What?" Puck groaned, not wanting to hear from Sue how he should get a room with the wannabe diva. He would love to; heck they were in a room right now if only the damn teacher would leave and not lock the door this time.

"What's that film called with Alicia Silverstone where she plays some rich kid help this loser chick be popular and try to hook her up with some guy, who is oblivious to her so-called 'step brother' having a thing for her?" Sue enquired, ignoring the tone of his voice and watching both of the teens intently, hoping they weren't dumb but at the same time not figure out her true intentions.

"Clueless," they both responded at the same time, coincidentally gazing –according to Sue– into the other's eyes as they gave their answer, unknown to the fact that they were still holding hands.

Sue smirked at the two, going back to her magazine as a cover up to hide the fact she was taking a picture on her phone. "And that's what the two of you are, you crazy Jews."

"Just fuck each other already!"

Seven seconds and a wrestle in the mud later… "Ewww! I cannot believe you sucked my finger Santana!"

"Oh please Matt, get over it. Why are you whining, it's not the first time I've sucked something from your body."

Nine pairs of eyes stared at the Latina, seven of them disgusted, one of them embarrassed, and the other smiling like a goof ball. "Did she suck cream from your boobies as well?" Brittany asked Matt.

Not wanting to answer that ridiculous question, Matt distanced himself from the blonde.

"Did you have to shout that out loud?" Tina questioned. "Mr. Schue and Miss. Pillsbury are still looking for us, and they could've heard that and found us easily."

Long story short, when Mr. Schue had asked his students when the relationship of Wemma had began, they did the one thing that has proven effective in many situations – they ran. Except for Artie and Tina, who waited for the two adults to chase the rest of the clan before scooting off themselves. Eventually the students all found each other, and were now watching Puck and Rachel outside the science lab… that was until Santana was frustrated that PuckleBerry had sexual chemistry and weren't taking any action whatsoever and began to cuss.

"In my defence, they are two horny teens that know they want each other but are not doing anything about it. I'm merely giving them the push they need to pounce," Santana clarified, satisfied with her answer.

"Guys shush, Ms. Sylvester just asked them something," Mercedes hissed, using her hands as binoculars to hopely get a better view.

Everyone else –except Artie and Kurt, Artie was wheelchaired, and Kurt was sitting on Artie's lap to not step on the mud and ruin his new Alexander McQueen boots– scooted towards the window, either watching or listening to the scene unfolding before them.

"Seriously Ms. Sylvester? Even I knew the answer to that, and it's not because I'm Asian."

Nine pairs of eyes stare back at Mike, not even bothering to comment.

"You've watched Clueless?" Quinn asked, trying to hide a laugh.

Mike was struggling for a reason why. "Uh…um… well… I bet he has!" he bellowed, pointing an accusing finger at Kurt, still sitting on Artie's lap.

"Duh, I'm gay," Kurt responded simply, twirling Katy around his finger.

"BURN!" Santana howled, slapping Mike's arm.

Next thing to happen, Mike was dripping wet from head to toe. He turned to Brittany, annoyed and confused. "Why did you just pour water all over me?"

Brittany still smiled her goofy smile. "Santana said burn, and I don't want you to be on fire so I poured water from my bottle on you to kill the fire, and it worked."

Just like Matt did moments before, Mike also distanced himself from the blonde.

Everyone returned their gaze to the window and it was a comfortable silence for a while, until Tina commented, "If Puck was Asian, he would look like Taeyang, and he is pretty good looking. Except I prefer Onew, I love fried chicken."

Nine pairs of eyes glanced in Tina's direction, one filled with joy and delight while the other eight gave her the same blank expression with a clear message – what the fuck are you on about?

Seeing the eight faces of blankness, she rolled her eyes. "It's an Asian thing," she articulated, dismissing the matter.

"Always running to a different subject, aren't you Lucy Liu?" Santana huffed.

"Speaking of running," Finn piped out, pointing to something in the distance. The members of New Directions –except the two inside– all gasped when they saw the figures of Will and Emma running after them.

"RUN!" they all shouted, except for Artie and Kurt, who shouted to Tina, "PUSH!"

"To the ham and cheese of my ham and cheese sandwich," Sue declared, rising from her chair, obviously referring to the two –she assumed horny though she knew the boy was more– teens fighting over the dating sheet. Since Puck ripped his to shreds, he decided to read Rachel's answers since he believed it was fair he read out one of his answers. Rachel, clearly, didn't think that was the case, so now they were both fighting over possession of the questionnaire sheet. To think they wanted nothing to do with it a moment ago, and to think they were holding hands like long lost lovers reunited just before. But as the saying goes – all good things must come to an end.

"I'm gonna go get me some refills because my awesome body is craving some fruit salad, and I blame the two of you. Damn you and your names. DAMN YOU!" Sue howled, heading towards the entrance and opening the door. "I better not expect this door to be opened when I come back, I know where you two people go to school," and with that, she left, locking the door behind her.

Four and three quarters of a second later… "She's gone," Puck cheerfully sang, turning his full attention to the brunette.

"No Puck, we are not going to make out," Rachel assured him, pulling for her questionnaire sheet from his grasp.

"As much as I know you don't mean that and I wouldn't mind some of that right now, I was actually referring to something else," he pointed out, getting up of his seat and heading towards the window.

Curiosity got the better of Rachel to enquire, "What are you doing?"

It wasn't until she saw him pick up two Bunsen Burners that she realized what he was doing. "Puck, I will not have you blow up the Science laboratory!"

"Relax Princess; I'm not trying to do that. Although that is a sweet idea, I shall use that another time, so thanks babe," he thanked her, winking in the process.

"Then what are you trying to do, get yourself killed?"

"You would cry for me if that was the case, but I'm doing this instead." And with that, he threw the two Bunsen burners at the window, hoping the impact would break the glass. Instead, they bounced off the window, only leaving a few marks.

"Fuckity fuck fuck," Puck cursed, kicking one of the Bunsen burners and breaking off the metal piece that changed the colour of the flame.

This got Rachel irritated. She stalked towards him, tapping her foot impatiently. "You neanderthal! Don't break school property!"

"Honey, school is a prison and we are the prisoners. Think of it as us trying to escape to reach freedom."

"So in other words, the prisoners are breaking out of prison."

"Yeah, that too."

"Like Bunsen burners would actually help?"

"I had to try something. You heard her lock the door, I'd break the door but I've broken so many doors. Windows however, that I've never done. And besides, you only live once. Live life to the fullest, because the next minute, you could be wounded by a mortar shell while eating some cheese and drinking wine."

Rachel smiled at his last comment. For some odd reason, Puck had for once completed his English homework, and was now reciting how the war was random in A Farewell to Arms. Just because he actually finished homework for once did not mean he could sweet talk her into joining him in escaping the laboratory, even if she didn't want to stay here any longer. "I'm still not joining you."

Puck glanced at her with a glint in his orbs. "I never said you had to, but I would appreciate the company, and we could get back to you wanting to make out with me," he smirked.

"Which is a reason to stay here," Rachel affirmed, pulling a seat at one of the tables at the front of the class.

"Your loss babe," he assured her, resuming to find anything to throw at the window.

Rachel eyed the chemistry laboratory closely. It was a long time since she sat at the front of this class, ever since the punce in front of her kept distracting her from her learning. She cocked her head to the side and when she noticed fire extinguishers lined up next to each other near the entrance. "So the school cannot afford to send twelve students to a singing competition, but they can afford seven fire extinguishers for a classroom alone? I'm going to tell my daddy to file a lawsuit about this."

"What are you on about?" Puck questioned, looking at what the diva was referring to. After seeing what she was blabbering about, a grin that would rival the Cheshire cat's smile was plastered on his visage. "You are a genius Berry."

"What are you on ab-" Next thing she knew, she was shouting profanities at the badboy for using one of the extinguishers to break the window.

"Are you done with your yapping?" Puck wondered, peeking at an imaginary watch on his arm.

"I'm not yapping, and no I'm not finished. I'm still not going with you," she huffed.

"Actually, I think you should come with me," he informed her.

She eyed him warily. "And why is that?"

"Because when that crazy ass teacher comes back and sees the window broken, my sexy form gone and you here, she'll blame you for the window."

"She would not! I think out of the two of us, she would defiantly know it was you who broke the window."

"It could've been you trying to frame an innocent handsome man, and then what's your alibi?"

Damn, he had her there. But she was sick of his presence. Going with him would mean she would break some rules, be a rebel herself. But she did not want to be blamed for something she did not commit. Why was he so damn hot?

"Fine, I'll join you. But on one condition."

"And what's that honeybunch?"

"Make that two conditions – one, no funny business, and two, stop calling me those words you believe are endearments."

"Can't promise baby."

What had she gotten herself into?

"Ladies first."

"Oh no. You're just either going to cope a feel like last time or try to peek up my skirt like last time. No, you go first."

"You worry too much, but fine I'll go first."

She was not worried for him when he decided to jump out the window as if he was swimming the freestroke. She heard some sort of splash, and a part of her was thrilled she did not volunteer to go first. But now she had second thoughts if this was the best way to leave the classroom.

"Hurry up damsel in distress, your Prince Charming has to take a piss."

That didn't help her decision making.

"Shush you criminal. Are you sure this is safe?"

She saw him roll his eyes. "Babe, my arms are open for you so I can catch you when you fall. And this is probably the most action I'll have with a girl in a month."

Too much information to know. Wait, a month? Was he becoming celibate?

"If you drop me or I become injured because you fail at catching, expect a lawsuit in your direction," she threatened, bracing herself for her doom.

"Just jump you baby!"

So jump she did. Except when Puck caught her, he thought it would be funny the moment she was in his arms, he would drop her. Fine, he did it to piss her off and get her all riled up and also to get her dirty. If his phone hadn't died the previous night, he would have taken a pic of her right then and set it as his wallpaper. But witnessing her like this was a start.

Even though it was mud all over her, she was still damn sexy. Especially when she was angry. At him. "You jerkface idiot!"

"What did I do?" he asked innocently.

"You know what you did; you dropped me on purpose for your own amusement. You're going to pay for this you troll!"

"Does payment involve making out?"

"Expect to die Noah Puckerman, expect your fucking ass to die!"

And the chase between Rachel Berry and Noah Puckerman began across the football field.

"Come back here Puckerman!"

"I'd like to survive before my kid is born thank you very much."

"I'll tell the child you conceived with Quinn and everyone else the story about how you were killed, and it will go along the lines of me murdering your sorry ass!"

"Instead why don't you tell everyone else the story about how you murdered my cock repeatedly that one time when it was a hot summer night, and you used your amazing tongue to-"

"That will never ever happen you disgusting pervert!"

And the two began to wrestle in the mud.

"If you wanted to be on top, you should've just asked babe."

"How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me those names?"

"Well you're making it hard for me to not say how hot and sexy you are, even when you're covered in mud."

"And since you're covered in mud, eat mud pig!"

"…Did you just throw mud at my face? You're going down baby!"

"Catch me if you can!"

"I plan to do more than that after when I do!"

"Have we gotten away from them?" Mercedes glanced around, hoping to not see a tuft of curly hair or ginger hair in her peripheral vision.

"Yep. Thank the fucking lord," Santana muttered, filing her nails.

"Although I have to wonder why the hell we are hiding under the bleachers," the other diva of the club wondered out loud.

"Trust me, we're safe. Once, Brittany and I couldn't be bothered going to cheer practice so we hid under here when Sylvester was hunting us down. And since we had nothing else to do, we made out under the bleachers."

Mercedes wanted to vomit. "Too much information."

Before Santana could respond, the two heard some loud bickering from the football field and both peered from where they were under the bleachers to see who they were. When the girls heard shouting from a girl and taunting from a guy, they both had their suspicions to which those two could be. And their suspicions were both confirmed when they saw a girl with a short skirt with mud all over herself and a guy with a mohawk being wrestled in the mud by said girl.

Santana chuckled, very happy. "Hah. So that extra push worked after all."

Mercedes glanced to the Latina, confused. "What are you on about Santana?"

Santana rolled her eyes, but gave her companion next to her a response. "What I mean Beyoncé is that I'd like to think today is the day they both got their jiggy on."

*Sigh* GO GEELONG FOR DEFEATING COLLINGWOOD! And before I forget, this is an early bday prezzie for my pals Monique and Chloe, so for the aforementioned girls GO AND... SLEEP.

I need a hug, so while I pester my dad for a hug at 1AM, why don't you lil' young'uns go and SING A SONG AT THE TOP YOUR LUNGS.

SMIGGLE!
R&R!