I know I'm getting views so I would really like feed back. Especially if I ask a question cause it makes writing the next chapter irritating if I don't know what readers want. Example I didn't know if i should write Jace's or Clary's PoV first. Or if I'm developing it to fast or even if the story makes a lick of since. So! Please Review and Follow! (And thank you for the 4 reviewers already. It says 7 but IWriteNaked reviewed all of the first 3 chapters so Thank You!)
Oh and I don't have a scheduled writing time and I've been out of school for 6 days cause I was deathly (well it felt like it but not really) sick and an extended weekend for Labor Day so I wrote a lot which means I updated 4 times. So if I don't update for another week. It's cause I have homework, marching band practice and a football game, and a life. So no hard feelings!
Oh and has anyone noticed that I knock the characters out at the end of my chapters cause every time I start a chapter it is along the lines of: When I wake up... Haha what does that say about my personality?
Oh and Jonathan's Out Of Characters (is that what people of the fanfiction world call it) well duh he's not evil in this fanfiction (or is he?) Kidding! he's not. Anyway he gets emotional and big brotherly and he probably will stay that way and I'm writing him how I've always wanted an older brother so he's staying.
Clary
I open my eyes to the surroundings of a hospital room. I look around and theres a window and its night outside. Weird it was morning when i was... Wait what happened? I think back and don't remember anything past joking with Jonathan this morning and then I come upon a block in my memory.
A beeping is starting to annoy me so i look and there's a heart monitor to my left that it attached to my index finger. The room is void of anyone but myself at the moment and I decide to forget that my mind is empty and take the time to search myself for injuries.
I feel weight on my head and I bring my restricted arm to my head and feel a bandage there. I mentally inspect my body and my ribs are numb and there's a brace on my right thigh but I must have some pain medicine in me because I can't feel them hurt.
I close my eyes and lay my head back and rest till someone comes in here. Some time passes and the door opens and footsteps walk across the room. Someone sighs and sits down in the chair by the bed and takes my unmonitored hand. They squeeze really hard and lay their head on my arm.
I'm surprised to feel liquid stream down my arm. The person is silently crying for me. I take a deep breath and I smell cologne and I know it's Jonathan. I open my eyes to check and his white blond hair is all I see.
I am causing him pain right now. He's crying because of me. I close my eyes and decide to leave it alone since he needs me and I want to comfort him.
He shoots up when I squeeze his hand. "Clary?" He rasps. He grabs my shoulder lightly and shakes me and jolts my slightly sore ribs since the medicine is wearing off. "Clary. Clary! Are you awake?" I groan. And open my eyes. His face is streaked with a mix of dried and wet tears. His hair is disarrayed and it looks like he hasn't slept since the night before whatever I did to get in here. Which is however long.
I smile slightly and punch him lightly on the arm. "Hey I'm okay Jon. What's the long face?" He looks shocked and doesn't look like he comprehends and then he smiles blindly and moves so fast I can hardly see him and crushes me into a hug. Ow. I ignore it and hug him tightly to me till it gets to be to much. "Hey Jon? Oww." He whips away from me as fast as he came and he wipes his eyes. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you! I mean... Look at you, you look awful and you're hurting and it's my fault and I'm so sorry Clare!" He puts his head in his hands. Ohh he blames himself for what happened. Whatever that was.
"Jonathan Fairchild. Look up at me right now." He hears my tone and hesitantly looks up but he doesn't meet my eyes. I grab his chin and force him to look at me.
"Jonathan I don't remember what happened but I really don't think it's your fault whatever happened. Okay?" He looks at me and sighs.
"See you don't remember, you don't know. You were in a car wreck 2 week ago and the doctors put you in a medical coma but wouldn't tell me or anyone what for. They just said they weren't allowed to without the patients consent. I mean, What the hell does that even mean?! Your consent! They put you in a fucking coma how are we supposed to ask you if...? What? I don't even know! They wouldn't tell me anything! And I thought I had killed my little sister_" he can't continue cause he's shaking so hard.
"Jon. Jon. Jonathan!" I say each word in rhythm with my hits on him. "I'm obviously fine whatever it is. I'm better now and they took me out of it. I'm okay. Now please tell me how I got here in the first place."
He doesn't right away. He has to calm down first. When he does he tells me how me and him were joking around that morning a week ago and how I had gone in my bedroom and came back out closed off and mad and I walked out the door like that. He says how he saw me and tried to stop me but I didn't hear him cause I was already gone and how he wasn't mad about me playing with him and that he planned on asking me after school about what had me worried. He says that I never showed up at school and when I hadn't shown up at home by 6 pm. He called around and was told there was a car wreck on the main road connecting our house and the school with a car that looked like mine.
He drove straight to the hospital and called Mom and Luke and when they got there I was already in surgery to set my leg bone and then I was put into a medical coma. (I think that's what it's called. It's where the doctors keep the person unconscious if being awake would injure them or their state of mind.)
"See Jon. Not your fault I'm fine. Now hand me my phone." I don't recall be upset just goofing off with him and nothing else. He has no reason to be upset.
My book bag and purse were saved from the wreck and put in the corner of m room. He rummages around till he pulls out a plastic tube. A Tampon. Lovely. "Jon! Just get me my phone!" He laughs and I know his teasing is just a way to ease his conscience so I'm fine with it. He hands it to me and I press the button and the screen lights up. My main screen is full of notifications but what surprises me is the messages. 25 new messages. I click on it and the screen has a Blue dot by Jon's contact that must be when he was trying to find me. But what surprises me is the top contact which also has a blue dot signifying new unread messages. Jace. The name tugs at my mind and I click on the messages.
Hey
Hey
Pigeon
Pidge?
Clary
Clary?
Clary!
R U ok?
Are you mad at me?
Why aren't you or your brother at school?
Clarissa Adele Fairchild (yes I figured out your middle name) if you don't answer me
I'm calling the police.
Ohmygod Clary! Answer the phone! The police said you were in a car wreck!
Im going to the hospital.
There were more from him in between his panicking and him figuring out where I was. But who was he? I don't recall having a friend names Jace. And I think I would according to his contact photo. With his dark blond, almost gold, hair and actual gold eyes smiling into the camera. He was definitely no eyesore. I couldn't forget that face.
I turn the phone around and show it to Jonathan. "Who is this?" I ask. He looks at me with a surprise and anger on his face and in his voice when he answers.
"Um.... According to you, he's your best friend. You know skipping and picking flowers and all that. I only saw you hanging out with him the day before the car wreck. The day after that he was absent. Which raised enough eyebrows where Mum won't let him come and see you. He begged and raised enough fuss the Security had to carry him out. At least they tried to but one came up behind him and grabbed his shoulder and you should have seen him drop. It was kind of nice to see really. He fought and it looked like they were hurting him and he only stopped cause one almost knocked him unconscious which made the doctors admit him. They brought him to a room and they found wounds up and down his back. When he woke up the doctors asked him what happened he said he got into a really bad fight but the doctor didn't believe him. But they couldn't prove him wrong. They explained that was why he was out of school and Mom believed it. But I don't. That boy is weird Clary. I don't want you seeing him anymore."
Jace. His name is Jace. I work the name in my mind for a second and a memory comes to me. Its because of something Jon said. It's of me asking Jace where his scars came from and he told me he got into a gang fight or something. Memories flood back in. And I want to slap myself for forgetting Jace. I gasp. Jace was trying to see me. And they wouldn't let him.
"Jonathan." That's all I say and he can tell I'm pissed. He opens his mouth probably to defend himself. "Why didn't you defend him? Do you realize what you could have done! If the situation was reversed I would be miserable. Being in that much pain from 'severe back wounds' and then knowing my best friend was in a coma. And being a suspect of putting her there! Did you not realize he wanted to see me to ease his mind. And now where is he? If he is sitting in a hospital room right now waiting to be released without seeing me Jonathan I won't talk to you for a month! I am screaming by the end and I know doctors will come. But I don't care. I look at Jonathan's face and I see the answer there.
Ah, hell no. I Struggle to sit up with my leg in its brace and my ribs pounding from breathing hard from screaming. I rip the heart monitor off and the band wrapped around my stomach and swing my left leg of the bed while I pick my right one up and ease my way up into a standing position.
By now the doctors are storming down the hall. I know cause I can hear them. Because my heart monitor is beeping and saying I'm dead and it sent a message to the nurse station. I take a step and I see a wheel chair sitting down in the corner. I stumble to it and sit down as the door bursts open. In comes a nurse screaming orders with a doctor behind her. They stop when they see me sitting there with Jonathan looking pale beside the bed.
He didn't try to fight me. He knew I wouldn't have listened. The doctor looks at me and says "Miss now I know it's a surprise to wake up in an unfamiliar place but I need you to calm down and let us help you back in bed."
"I am not getting in that bed until that nurse there wheels me to see Jace."
He looks confused. And he splutters when he answers "j-j-Jace? You mean Jonathan? The boy who was in the fight and caused a scene trying to see that young la-. Oh that was you." The nurse and doctor share a look of understanding that doesn't fit the context of the situation.
The nurse grabs Jonathan arm and pulls him out of the room. She comes back and shuts the door. As she turns to me she says " Now we will see to it that you see your boyfriend but we need you to get back in bed and relax." Boyfriend? Not quite lady. But I don't correct her. It's not the time.
"No I'm not going anywhere till I see him. He's waited long enough." To further my statement I cross my arms across my chest. I would have planted my feet on the ground but since I can't bend my right knee and it's placed in a wheelchair leg rest and it is raised in the air so I settle with just my arms.
She looks at me and sighs. As she walks towards me a wave of nausea runs through me and I can't even react before vomit covers my bare legs and hospital gown. Oh great. I can't go and see Jace in vomit attire. The nurse, and i look at her ID badge and her name is Trisha, makes a sound of surprise and rushes to my side and pulls my hair behind me. She wheels me into the bathroom and she turns and I hear a murmured conversation and she tells the doctor she'll take care of it and that he can come back later.
She peels the gown off me and throws it in the garbage dispenser. She grabs a plastic bag from the cabinet on the wall by the string that you pull if you have problems and need to call the nurse in here. She raps it all around my leg to cover the brace and normally I'd be embarrassed to be naked in front of a stranger but pssh she's a stranger and I don't care. And I feel gross.
She wheels me into the shower and helps me onto the chair in the shower. She scrubs it off me and turns the shower off. She wraps a towel around me and goes and gets a new gown for me.
I get dressed and she forces me into the bed when I try and fight it. She says to my confusion "Now young lady. You stop fighting me your boyfriend is fine, you are fine, and your baby will be fine if you stay in that bed."
I let that sink in. What! huh?
"Baby... Baby?... Baby! WHAT? No. I'm not pregnant. That's not right! I'm a virgin! Miss there's a mistake!"
Hahahahahaha Surprise! Nah not really. I hinted at it a lot. And practically said it in the summary with Clary.
Are you coming to these conclusions before I acknowledge them? Is this story moving to fast should I have moved slower? Does it suck?
Answer these questions! I need to know! Criticize it. do what ever. I want some type of feedback.
School starts back so don't expect the treat of an update everyday being normal.
Recommendation:
*drumroll*
Hush Hush saga! Becca Fitzpatrick
(It also has a type of Nephilim in it and fallen angels. Sigh. I love those types of books! And Patch is one gorgeous chunk of man (did you see what I did there (cause I did)))
Yes I realize I just put parentheses in parentheses in parentheses. Hence the ending.
Fly on,
Tessaherondale87