Chapter Two
They say be true, don't stain your bed
A bundle of white roses and an open bottle of red wine dangled from slender fingers as a dark woman stumbled through the ominous cemetery. Pausing for a moment, the woman lifted the bottle to her lips and let the warm liquor pour down her throat. It burned its way down to her stomach and she rolled her eyes in satisfaction as she felt the delicious sensation of heat coursing through her veins. The alcohol seemed to numb the inexplicable pain she was feeling, but it could not erase the thoughts that were pressing against her mind constantly. Pulling the bottle away from her reddened mouth in frustration she wiped the tart moisture from her lips with the sleeve of her coat and looked up at the stars.
Tilting her head upward was a bad idea as her lithe frame began to sway from the spinning that coursed behind her eyes. Blinking several times, she felt far more balanced, and continued looking up into the sky. Millions of tiny stars glittered against the inky black expanse as the full moon shimmered with its abundant glow. Her dark eyes grew soft as she acknowledged the simple beauty of it, and she sighed silently as she lowered her gaze and resumed walking toward her destination.
After the sheriff had left her house that evening, the brunette had felt a rush of foreign emotions clamp themselves around her. Invisible feelings squeezing her lungs until she felt as if she couldn't breathe, and when she closed her eyes it seemed like she was falling into a dark abyss of nothingness. No matter what she did nothing was able to aide her affliction, until she downed a tumbler filled with whiskey. It was at that moment that her mind began to quiet and her body slowly fell into a numbing state of relaxation. Grasping onto her newly found realization, the mayor quickly found the number of a babysitter and promptly called the young woman. Although she wasn't familiar with the girl, neither in Storybrooke nor in Fairytale Land, she obviously was not thinking clearly and eagerly left the woman to care for her son while she attended to her conflicted affairs.
Ever since the blonde had arrived in town, Regina had found herself gradually change within her mind. She began to have thoughts that had never fazed her previously, mood swings that had never been that vicious, but most of all feelings that the brunette had thought became dormant decades ago. But once the beautiful stranger had crashed into her quaint, little town everything inside of the mayor's mind seemed to morph and she didn't enjoy the feeling of it one bit. These trivial things that were awakening inside of her would only cause great pain and even greater weakness, and Regina knew that both of those elements could inevitably ruin everything for her. So, she simply drank and drank, and then drank some more until she felt her desires falter and flitter away as her inebriation settled in.
Growling under her breath the brunette became aware of the notion that no matter how intoxicated she was the thoughts of Emma would never leave her mind. She was a force to be reckoned with, an incredibly strong woman, and yet for the past couple of weeks nothing she did would stop the feelings that welled up inside of her whenever the sheriff was around. It sickened her. But, ultimately, there was absolutely no action she could take that would drive her internal thoughts away; nothing she could do that would stop her heart from hammering and fluttering when the blonde was near.
Shaking away her jumbled thoughts, Regina let her eyes focus back to the present and she realized that she had finally reached her father's crypt. Taking another large gulp of the wine, the brunette stumbled up the few steps and pressed the door open, nearly falling inside when it fell away from the casing. Catching herself haphazardly, the mayor walked inside and placed the flowers gently atop the cool surface of the coffin alongside the nearly empty bottle. As she brushed her fingers over her father's name she let a sob rip from her lungs while burning tears ran down her cheeks.
"Daddy," she whimpered, letting her eyes fill with fresh tears, "I don't know what to do—I wish you were here…I wish you could tell me what I should do…"
Her chest heaved as her heart pounded loudly within her ears; her lungs seeming to catch on fire from the burning breaths that shuddered from her lips. Although the brunette carried a great wealth of pain within her tainted heart, the greatest pain of all was the loss of her father; that she had ripped the beating heart from his chest just so that she could be happy. And yet, even after destroying the only thing she truly loved happiness had yet to encompass her in its warm grasp. Oh, how she wished she could turn back time before she had enacted the curse, before she had murdered her own flesh and blood. But while these thoughts buzzed throughout her mind, she heard that dark, threatening voice speak up, berating her for her weakness and loss of resolve. Although the voice was her's she knew deep down that they were not her words and that over time she had grown into a person that she hated. Of course, she was the Evil Queen, the woman that could make anyone quiver in fear at the sight of her. But right now, and in her heart for always, she wasn't evil, she was Regina; a woman scorned who let hatred and pain overtake her in a cloak of darkness and she was now paying the torturous, eternal price for it.
"I'm sorry…about everything—all of it." The brunette couldn't stop crying, and she bleakly wiped at her cheeks as they were once again covered with her sorrow. "You have no idea how much I…how much I hate myself for what I've done. All I want is—"
The noise of a branch breaking in the distance stopped her from speaking as she covered her mouth, a scared gasp escaping between her fingers. What if someone was out there, what if they saw her like this? The thoughts spun a web of hesitation within her liquor addled mind, and her nails dug into the cold stone of the wall as she tried to hide herself in the darkness. After several moments of silence, Regina heard nothing more from her spot inside the crypt and she let her hand fall away, taking in deep, hitched breaths as she let her eyes flutter closed in relief.
"Emma Swan—the new sheriff…" the brunette began in a whisper, her words falling from her mouth in a jagged, frightened tone, "…she's going to destroy me. She…she makes me feel things that I—" Taking a deep shaking breath, Regina let a few silent tears escape her eyes as she delves deeply into her heart to reveal her most intimate thoughts to her beloved father. "—that I don't—that I can't feel. I just can't, daddy, and it's eating me alive."
The quiet whispers had quickly escalated to louder, tortured sobs as she felt her heart being pried open at her confession. The very prospect of having her words littered into the world made the last morsel of her strength crumble, and she collapsed against the coffin and wept. Dark eyes burned as hot liquid seeped from them incessantly, and her body shuddered harshly from the anguish that exploded inside of her. Throughout the duration of the evening she had slowly become undone, until she felt every inkling of pain she had ever felt burst from her as she spoke privately to her father. Every bad memory, every traumatic event fell from her eyes in the form of tears until she felt so empty that she continued to cry because she felt so disgustingly weak.
"Who's there?"
Regina's head snapped up as she heard the familiar voice calling from outside of the stone crypt. The brunette's body was frozen in fear as her eyes burned from the luminous glow of a flashlight that seeped in from the small crack of the open door. She remained quiet, the blonde woman had already seen a sliver of her weakness earlier that evening, and the mayor did not want her to ever see that side of her again. No matter what she did she would not be able to muster the composure that was acceptable for other's to see; she was too far gone.
"When someone asks you a question you—"
The sheriff pushed the door open forcefully as she spoke, but was quickly rendered silent as she saw the 'intruder' before her. The mayor's torso was sprawled across the stone coffin, her slight weight crushing a dozen white flowers beneath her. Dark hair was disheveled and fell over red, glossy eyes and glistening cheeks. Her red lips were parted as shuddering breaths rose from her throat in startled gasps. Emma lowered her flashlight quickly as she slowly emerged deeper into the crypt, standing closer to the fallen woman.
"Madame Mayor," she whispered dumbstruck, placing a gentle hand on the crying woman's shoulder, "are you alright?"
"This is none of your concern!" The brunette seethed venomously as she recklessly pulled away from the blonde's touch, "you have no right to be here!"
Reaching out towards Regina quickly, Emma grasped onto a slender arm and dragged her back onto her feet before she fell backwards. Black eyes glared at her in pure, fiery anger and the blonde mentally flinched as the older woman pushed her roughly. Forcing herself not to stumble, she grabbed onto the cold cover of the coffin and for the first time acknowledged the half-empty bottle of wine. Narrowing her eyes she traced her long fingers over it delicately, and then shifted her gaze to the rattled woman who was visibly shaking with rage. Stepping closer, the sheriff could smell the liquor on Regina's breath, and she cursed at herself for not noticing it earlier.
"You're drunk," the blonde said matter-of-factly as she placed her hands on her hips involuntarily, "and you're acting crazy—wait…what about, Henry?"
"I have it taken care of, dear," the mayor snipped as she predatorily entered Emma's personal space, "I am his mother after all."
"This is nuts, I'm taking you home."
"You have no right! This is my town, and this is my father's crypt. Just because you're the sheriff now, Ms. Swan does not mean you can overtake my authority."
Pale and dark eyes challenged each other silently, as the two women stared at each other in an attempt to get the other to follow their will. But, both being stubborn neither woman budged on their respective notions. Sighing softy, Emma lowered her gaze to the floor; she wanted so badly to be angry with the mayor, to have the strength to arrest her for unconcealed alcohol in community lots, or disruptive behavior, anything. And yet, the only feeling or thoughts that the blonde could muster about the woman in front of her was pity and worry. She was terribly frightened for her and she had an inexplicable urge to wrap the broken woman in her arms and tell her that everything would be okay; that she was safe with her.
"But this is my job…" the sheriff sighed in exasperation as she flicked her gaze back up towards the brunette, "I can't just leave you here."
"Yes you can, dear," the mayor retorted, the icy tone having left her voice, "and you will."
"Look, Madame Mayor, either you come with me willingly and I take you home," Emma began, as she crossed her arms over her chest, "or you fight me and I take you into custody. Your move."
"You've got to be kidding me…" Regina fumed, her eyes narrowing as she took in the blonde shaking her head; her hands quickly balled into tight fists, "under what grounds?"
"Consuming alcohol on public property, disruptive behavior, insubordination…do I need to continue?"
The brunette shook her head in disgust as she turned away from the sheriff and scrubbed her hands over her face roughly. Although she had made it through her debate with the younger woman mostly unscathed she was still severely intoxicated, and she felt her brain swim inside her skull wearily. Perhaps this wasn't such a bad thing; after all she was excruciatingly tired and had been dreading the walk home. But, simultaneously she wished that she wouldn't have given up her resolve so quickly, she had much more fight left within her, and yet she couldn't seem to muster the passionate anger she once could when pitted against the immovable blonde. It was those sickening feelings that were holding her back; Regina's mind whispered that she would sooner cut out her very own heart than to let her feeble emotions dictate her, and yet she knew that the thought was a lie.
Turning around quickly, the mayor shuffled around Emma and over towards the foot of the coffin. Pressing her fingers against the cool stone again, she let her eyes close as she tried to get a grasp on herself; tried to reign in the torrid storm of emotions that spun out of control behind her eyes. She felt like screaming and crying, but instead she merely reached a hand towards the bottle of wine that remained atop of the casket and lifted it to her lips. But before she could take a much needed gulp of the bitter liquid she felt a warm, gentle hand cover her own and pry the bottle away slowly. Shooting daggers with her black eyes, Regina lunged after the bottle but was halted by a firm grip on her shoulders. The blonde had set the bottle behind her and was now holding the mayor's shoulders with both hands, staring directly into her eyes.
"Regina, look at yourself!" Emma commanded, shaking the woman slightly as she felt the older woman fight against her hold. "You can barely walk straight, and you smell like a brothel. This isn't you!"
"This," the brunette shouted, motioning to herself as she finally pulled away from the sheriff's grasp on her, "is your fault!"
"How in the hell—"
"Don't be stupid, Ms. Swan, you know exactly what I'm talking about!" the brunette felt her mind begin to settle as she yelled at the other woman; it felt good to finally be able to be successfully angry with her. "Henry. All he wants is you— I raised him! I am his mother...and he hates me—he hates me…"
"Regina…"
"No!" the mayor continued, unaware that tears were tumbling down her cheeks as she spoke, "you don't get to speak. You lost that privilege when you decided to make my life a living hell—when you made me feel…"
Her words were lost upon her as ragged whimpers reverberated throughout the small, stone crypt. Regina let herself cry; her hand covering her mouth as her body wracked violently with shuddering sobs. Without thinking Emma closed the space between them and wrapped her long arms tightly around the shaking woman. The brunette tried to fight her way out of the warm embrace, but eventually she gave up and fell into it completely; her thin arms looping around the younger woman's waist as her face pressed against a long neck. Regina's fingers dug deeply into the thick leather jacket that Emma was wearing as she held onto her desperately. Slowly, she began to calm down as she listened to the steady pulse of the blonde, and the reassuring whispered litanies of 'I'm sorry'.
Emma's heart had shattered as she listened to the tear-filled confession of the mayor; all she wanted was to be happy and no matter what she did it always seemed as though someone got in the way of that. This time, it was her and the blonde felt terrible. When she had gathered the courage and finally embraced the nearly hysterical woman she wasn't prepared for the hurricane of sensations that flooded through her veins and directly into her heart. As the delicious feelings washed over her she felt the lithe frame against her pull away gently and she lifted her head, gazing into glassy black eyes. For a moment Emma couldn't read the emotions that fluttered behind Regina's eyes, but once she could she had to choke back a sob of her own as she witnessed the well of pain that waded within the dark depths. Cautiously, she lifted a hand and brushed away the tears from a perfectly sculpted cheek; eventually, the sheriff simply let her fingers caress the smooth, moist skin in hopes that it would soothe the aching woman.
As she felt gentle fingers brush against her cheeks, Regina looked into soft green eyes and the compassion that radiated from them made her heart flutter rapidly in her chest. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol, or her fatigue but something inside of her mind silenced and let her fall deeper and deeper into the swelling waves of emotion. Before she realized what she was doing, the brunette felt her body press up tightly against the hard body of the sheriff's as their lips crashed together. Emma's eyes fluttered shut as she felt herself pushed backwards until she banged into a cold, stone wall roughly, but ignored it as she let her mouth open and coaxed Regina's tongue inside. The kiss was full of hunger and confliction; teeth nipping roughly at full lips, tongues twirling wildly as nails dug violently into flesh. It was delicious and forbidden, and neither woman could contain their desire for one another as touches became bolder and moans grew louder.
"Regina…" the sheriff groaned, as the older woman's lips dropped to her throat, licking up the sensitive column. Green eyes slid open, and after they refocused Emma realized where they were, and why they were there and her body stiffened. "Regina—Regina, stop…"
Everything was lost upon the brunette as she feasted on the younger woman's tender flesh, sucking and biting as she felt her body alight with a raging fire. In the back of her mind she could hear it hissing at her to stop, that if she were to venture further into her sexual endeavors it would bring about her demise. But she couldn't stop herself, the lust that coursed through her veins combined with the alcohol induced a rather animalistic, carnal hunger to churn inside her loins and she was beginning to lose herself in the haze of it all. Though, as she felt the body beneath her become rigid, and the voice from above tell her to stop, she looked up, her eyes flashing dangerously at Emma.
"Not here…not like this…" the sheriff breathed, trying to gingerly pull the woman away from her.
"But, I want you…" Regina hissed against the blonde's ear, feeling a shiver run through the muscular frame, and she smirked knowingly, "…and I know you want me, too."
"I said no…" said Emma with more force, as she grabbed the mayor by the wrists and pushed her away, but maintained her hold on the woman, "you're drunk—you don't know what you're doing…I won't be your mistake."
Dark eyes glared at the sheriff in heated anger, and the brunette's mouth contorted into a tight snarl as her fingernails bit deeply into the flesh of her palms. The blonde watched as the disgust washed over the beautiful woman's face, but she knew that she was doing the right thing and stood by her decision. No matter how badly she missed the way the older woman felt pressed against her she would not abuse her clear headed state by taking advantage of the drunken woman. But, Regina didn't see it that way; she merely saw it as someone who was playing with her emotions; the emotions that she had bottled up so well until the blonde had come in and pushed every single one of the mayor's buttons. She had coaxed the feelings directly from her heart and then rejected the dark woman, and the brunette would not accept that type of treatment, not after all she had been through. So, in a blind, unknowing rage, Regina pulled her arms away from the sheriff's grasp, pulled back and resoundingly slapped the unsuspecting woman violently across the face.
"Jesus Christ!" Emma hissed as the pain in her cheek pounded against her head, and she brushed her fingertips over the reddening skin.
"Take me home, Ms. Swan…" the brunette said strictly; although all of the anger had evaporated from her body she was still clearly annoyed, and the sting that tingled through her fingers didn't seem to help. "I want to go home…now."
Gapping wordlessly, the sheriff shook her head, still shocked, and merely nodded her head towards the door as she walked away from the mayor. Nothing about this evening was normal; it was as if some higher power were playing with her life in the form of a game. First, she had witnessed Regina crying in the backyard while she was spending time with Henry, and comforted her accordingly. Then, she was promptly kicked out of the woman's house, only to find her in an even worse state hours later after being called to investigate strange on goings. Finally, the woman had kissed her, and then quickly slapped her across the face. All in one night she wanted to scream, cry, shout and laugh, which wasn't anything at all like Emma, and she hated feeling that way. But as she slumped her shoulders and walked out into the cool night air, she knew that all of her emotional wirings went haywire whenever Regina was around and she simply wished that it would stop as these feelings she was beginning to have for this insufferable woman was bound to cause her great pain.
With both women lost in their own thoughts, they walked in silence to the cruiser; neither even bothering to acknowledge the other's presence as it seemed to cause too much confusion and a wide spectrum of combating emotions. After a few moments of distracted walking they reached the car, and Emma pulled open the passenger side door and quickly rounded the car as the brunette slipped inside. An awkward silence filtered within the vehicle as the two women fumbled with their seatbelts, and as they turned to snap them in place their eyes met. Green staring into black and vice versa; they remained holding each other's gaze for a few fleeting seconds when Regina clicked her's in place and shifted her body so that she was looking out the window. The blonde looked after her as a frown pulled at her lips, and she slowly let her gaze redirect to the road as she turned on the ignition.
Regina watched absently as trees and houses flittered by her window, but she was too far gone into the realm of her thoughts to notice. Although she could still feel the burn of the wine in her stomach, she could also feel her head slowly begin to clear which wasn't necessarily a good thing. She began to curse herself violently for letting her emotions and desires get the better of her; not only did she declare all of the hurtful imaginings about her son, she had fallen into temptation and had kissed the woman. She shook her head gently in distain, how had she let herself lose so much self-control? It had been one jarring evening that could have been easily cured by a good night's rest. And yet, as she closed her eyes and remembered the feeling of Emma's lips against her's, the brunette wasn't sure if she would have traded her mistakes and fumbles for a clean slate.
Smiling softly, she let the tips of her fingers brush against her lips; but quickly pulled them away as she felt the cruiser come to a steady halt. Opening her eyes quickly, Regina saw that they were parked outside of her house, and she breathed deeply, both in relief and disappointment. Turning toward Emma she opened her mouth to say something, but decided against it; no, her heart was weak and she had ignored it for years she could easily continue to do so. Closing her mouth, she knew that, at least for tonight, she would not let herself be tempted by frivolous emotions. It was a stupid game that only the weak played and if she were going to find her happiness she could not be bolstered by a fluttering heart, or soft lips. She needed a sharp, forceful mind; love, infatuation, or even a meager crush was out of the question. And as she felt her strength build up at the very thought, the brunette opened the door in an attempt to get as far away from this night as possible when a gentle hand stopped her. Leaning back into the car she looked into pale, tired eyes and lifted a dark brow in question.
"Regina—I—" the blonde stumbled over her words, as she looked up meekly at the older woman, "I just…"
"Goodnight, Ms. Swan." The mayor interrupted, snatching her arm away from the tender hand as she slammed the car door in the process.
Watching as the woman stormed away Emma slowly let her hand drift back to the steering wheel which she gripped with anguish. She had tried her hardest to reach out to Regina; had tried her very best to smooth things over from where they had left off in the cemetery. But her words were not given the ability to be voiced and the blonde felt as though the woman had ripped the very heart from chest; everything had become numb. Perhaps it wasn't worth the heartache; after all, if you sleep with the enemy all you'll end up with are stained sheets. And even as the thoughts ring true in Emma's head she can't push the thought of wanting to be there for the brunette; wanting to be with her. Shaking her head, she shifted the car into gear and took off; there was nothing she could do, the mayor just did not have the same set of feelings that she did.
But, as Emma raced down the street towards the Sheriff's Department, Regina banged her head against the door as she slumped against it. Her heart sobbing in her chest as her lungs burned, and she slowly released a breath that she hadn't known she was holding. The brunette's body was still tingling from the gentle touch, and her resolve of being strong was easily crumbling beneath her. Perhaps driving delicate emotions away wasn't as easy as developing jagged ones; and as she took in a second, deep, gulping breath she knew that the only way that she could maintain any modicum of strength was if she were to stay away from a certain Emma Swan.
A/N: Alright, so I didn't have anytime to proof-read this so I'm sure it's terrible, but bear with me; I got a random burst of inspiration through the middle of the night and pounded this out as quickly as I could. Regardless of my opinions, if you enjoyed it please, please review so that I may be overwhelmed enough to complete a few new chapters through the duration of the weekend. All of the people who have reviewed so far are lovely, and I adore each and everyone of you. Like I said, this chapter is NOT great, but I hope you like it despite that, and that you continue reading. But, as always, review if you'd like!