Chapter 12 – It Gets Real

"NO." Camille and James were staring at a smug Kendall, the mischievous glint in his eyes all too familiar. Camille had put Henry to bed early, both of them tired from a long day of job hunting. Kendall had sat the two of them down after dinner and come up with, in his mind, very civil "living agreements" for all of them.

"Hear me out, here. The three of us have to figure out how to live together and the longer we put this off, the worse it's going to get. So are we ready to mediate?"

James sloughed back into his seat. "Let's get this over with."

"What did you have in mind, Kendall?" Camille had her game face on.

"Well, first off, I think we should get the Henry boundaries covered. Now, I know for now you're having him refer to us as uncles, which I find super cute, by the way—"

"Pandering's not a good color on you, buddy." James rolled his eyes.

"BUT," the mediator continued, "being that James is Henry's dad, he should be able to interact with him on a more personal level. Now, it's up to you two how you figure all that out, but I think we can all agree that since James is going to be in Henry's life, and vice versa, they have the right to get to know each other."

"James, what do you think?" Camille looked across the table in earnest. She still hadn't quite gotten used to the idea of Henry and James being together, but under the circumstances, she wasn't in a position to argue.

"I would love to get to know Henry. Now, Cam—"

"Uh-uh," Kendall interjected. "You and Camille need to sit down and figure this out together, without me. You're the parents and I'm not running interference on that. Deal?"

"Deal," the parents reluctantly agreed.

"Good. Speaking of you two, I highly recommend you guys get your relationship settled as well. I don't really care how that happens as long as you don't kill each other, but for my sanity and your own, please sort it out." Suddenly, Kendall popped out of his chair and turned towards the staircase. "Have fun with that!" he called out as he ran upstairs.

"What about you?" James yelled."

A cheery voice came from the shadows, "I don't need to mediate! I'm awesome!" His smirk could be heard all the way downstairs.

Then the silence started. It was a dense silence, filled with four years of unspoken words and suppressed feelings. It was the kind of silence that made you want to scream for noise's sake. Unfortunately, James and Camille had grown quite comfortable with that kind of silence, which made the next few moments that much more unbearable.

"Well, we haven't really talked since…" James started nervously.

"No, that's true. Not really."

"So…what have you been up to?"

"Other than birthing and raising our child, you mean?"

"I figured that part was obvious. I mean…well, what happened? How did you end up here?" James leaned in, intently listening.

"After you guys left, I worked for as long as I could until I started showing. My dad and I moved out of the Palm Woods, but he made it very clear that I couldn't count on him forever. For about a year, we made it work, both of us taking odd jobs while the other watched Henry until one day I came home and found my dad's bags waiting by the door. He told me that it was time for me to 'work it out on my own,' meaning he either couldn't or wouldn't support me anymore. I never found out which. Luckily, that was around the time I booked that play Kendall saw me in and that gave me enough to support myself. Lucy was still around then and she kind of became my live-in babysitter. After a few months, though, I was back to working odd jobs here and there. I got a pretty steady job at a diner for a while, but once Lucy's band got signed to a major label and took off on tour, I had to stop so I could take care of Henry full time. We signed up for welfare and food stamps, and that worked up until about a year ago. That's when we moved into a homeless shelter. We could have stayed there, honestly, but Henry's going to start school soon and I just don't want him to have to go through life thinking that he is less than anyone else for where he lives or that his mom can't work. I've been looking for a job, any job, since we moved into the shelter and I'm just not getting anything, especially in this economy. All my auditions have been swift rejections and I'm not qualified to do much else. I have a GED, but that will only get me so far. Right now I'm between waitressing or becoming a cleaning lady somewhere. So much for the home of the future famous."

James had tears in his eyes. "Camille. I'm so sorry."

"James, don't. It's not all your fault. I could have avoided all this and I didn't."

"You tried, Cam. You thought you were doing the right thing for the two of you." James grimaced. He knew it wasn't so simple. "No one could have predicted that it would end up like this."

"Do you think it really would have been better if we'd actually gone through with it, James?"

"I can't say. I really can't. But do you think it would have been worse?"

Camille buried her head in her hands, thinking back to that day. James' red puffy eyes were still seared in her mind. She'd never seen his hair so lifeless, his soul so obviously shattered. The fact that it was her fault that he felt that way made it even worse. Her accusations were unfair and she never forgave herself for it. James was prepared to walk away from everything for her, and she threw it in his face. Every day she thought about what it might have been like if only she had said "yes." They could have made it work. Camille knew, however, that if she hadn't said all those things she said that day, it would have stayed in her heart and on her mind. It would have come out eventually and who knows how it would manifest itself after years of suppression. The thought alone was enough to frighten her.

"Hey, are you okay?" James reached for her now trembling hands.

Swiftly and silently, Camille pulled away from the table. Their eyes met, hers cold as steel.

"It could have been so much worse, James."