Chapter 4

Months passed since the incident at the lake. Arthur and Merlin slipped back into their usual banter, arguing about each other's intelligence levels and how pathetic the other was. Arthur enjoyed it, but there was always a niggling in the back of his mind, causing him to look closer at Merlin.

There were times when Merlin would look paler than before, like something was clearly bothering him. He refused to tell Arthur what, and would often slip out with some excuse or another.

Merlin also had a habit of disappearing, and the first time it happened Arthur went down to the tavern to look for him and couldn't find him anywhere. So that was a lie—probably one Gaius came up with. That was when Arthur figured out that whatever Gaius was hiding, he was hiding it to protect Merlin. It stung that neither of them trusted Arthur, but Arthur would remember the flash of agonized fear and back away from his anger.

Arthur was relieved to note that Merlin really was a terrible liar—he was just really, really good at avoiding the topic and redirecting it to a 'safe' topic.

The knights all felt quite guilty. The first few weeks they were skittish around Merlin, confusing the dark-haired servant terribly. After Arthur told Merlin what they had done, Merlin went and spoke to all of them separately, privately. Arthur had no idea what was said, but all the knights eased back into their banter with Merlin. Arthur would sometimes catch Gwaine looking stricken when Merlin and Percival teased each other, or Leon looking shamed when Merlin stumbled into the room. Overall, however, they jumped back into their easy relationship with Merlin with fervor.

Guinevere took a bit more time. Merlin was one of her oldest friends, and she was horrified that she followed him to such a private meeting. She and Merlin would often talk, Guinevere apologizing many times. Merlin began looking bemused and would often just reassure Gwen, telling her that he had followed her often enough—when her life was in danger. Both he and Arthur realized that that did little to reassure Gwen, and Merlin dropped that tactic quickly.

And so the months turned into years, and the years flew by quickly.

Arthur was dying.

The pain in his side was telling him how painfully short his time on this earth was. He opened his eyes blearily and gazed around.

"Merlin?"

Merlin turned quickly, and Arthur realized that no one else was with them. Merlin had abandoned him, but had come back.

He felt happy.

Until the words "I am a sorcerer. I have magic." Poured from Merlin's mouth. Reassurances pour from Merlin's mouth, but Arthur was stuck on magic. Merlin had magic.

"Leave me," Arthur managed.

"Arthur—"

"No, just . . . you heard! Just . . ."

Merlin backed away, and Arthur closed his eyes, unable to look at the pain on Merlin's face.

Arthur isn't really aware of what happens over the next few days. He's aware that Gaius comes, and that he tried to convince Gaius to come with him instead of Merlin. He isn't really sure why he bothered; Merlin had never left his side before. The buffoon wouldn't start now.

And therein lay the crux of Arthur's dilemma. He kept trying to pin Merlin as an evil sorcerer. But that's not what Merlin was. Merlin was . . . Merlin.

"Merlin has been keeping secrets his whole life. It was necessary to ensure his survival. Merlin will tell you when he gains the courage and peace of mind. For now, support him in any way that you can. Merlin loves you like a brother, and one day he will tell you. Just trust in him as you have always done."

"Why did you never tell me?"

Merlin looked over at him, his eyes sad. "I wanted to, but . . ."

"What?" Arthur prompted.

"You'd have chopped my head off."

"I'm not sure what I would've done." Arthur admitted, unable to think that maybe he would have had Merlin executed. Because how . . .

"And I didn't want to put you in that position." Merlin said gently.

"That's what worried you?" Arthur asked, shocked.

Merlin looked at him straight in the eyes. "Some men are born to plow fields, some live to be great physicians, others to be great kings." He tilted his head slightly, and Arthur gazed back with rapt attention. "Me, I was born to serve you, Arthur. And I'm proud of that. And I wouldn't change a thing."

This is Merlin. Arthur thought distantly. This is who he is.

Because Merlin had always had an unwavering faith in him. Always. Merlin, the brave and loyal and wise idiot. He had never doubted Arthur.

That was who he was.

They weren't going to make it. Arthur knew that. It was a distant thought in his mind, but the pain had spread from his side to his chest.

Merlin kept trying—the bloody idiot kept trying to get him to the lake. The lake where Freya was. The lake where Arthur had only begun to understand his manservant. Now he had the finally piece—Merlin was a sorcerer, and had been all along.

And, strangely, it wasn't the magic that bothered him. He wasn't even that bothered by the lies. He understood why Merlin had kept it to himself—it's not like Arthur had really ever been open to the idea of magic. He could only hope Guinevere would legalize magic; Merlin had hidden for far too long.

No, what bothered him was, even after all this time and all these years, there was still some part of Merlin that feared Arthur. And that . . . that idea made Arthur shrink in pain.

It didn't really matter what Merlin had done for Arthur and Camelot—Arthur could guess at a lot (especially since he knew Merlin was that old man who, ultimately, did save Gwen from the pyre and tried to save his father).

What mattered, in the end, was that Merlin had stayed.

"I want to say . . . something that I've never said to you before." Arthur said. Merlin was looking down, tears clinging to his lashes. Arthur struggled to move his head to look at him, staring at Merlin without fear . . . there was nothing to fear, after all.

"Thank you," he said.

And that 'Thank you' wasn't like all the other thank yous he'd said over the years. Thank you for staying with me when he defeated that one monster. Thank you for actually doing a decent job. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for those unexpected words of wisdom.

No, this thank you . . . it wasn't a thank you for saving him and Camelot. It wasn't a thank you for staying with him even though any sane person would have left. It wasn't even a thank you for putting up with Arthur and all of his troubles.

It was a thank you for being his friend.

In the end, that was all that truly mattered to Arthur.

And all went dark.

There was a light, and Arthur blinked against it. He was struggling to move his head, to sit up. Anything. Any movement sent a jolt of vertigo down his spine.

He finally opened his eyes, and glanced around.

He was surrounded.

"You cannot do this on your own," an ancient voice spoke softly in his mind. It sounded familiar, for some reason. "Part of what makes you a great man and a great king was listening to your friends and hearing their council."

Gwen shifted next to him, her eyes still closed tight.

Gwaine moaned softly to himself about needing another drink.

Leon was digging the heels of his palms into his eyes.

Elyan was curled up tight, snoring softly.

Percival was attempting to sit up, struggling to open his eyes and look around.

Gaius was lying still, but his chest was moving up and down slightly.

They were sitting on the shores of a lake, the water lapping at their heads a few feet away. The sky was a startling blue, the sun was gentle as it beat down upon them, and in the distance Arthur could see a grey tower, rising through the mist that clung to the surface of the water.

"Arthur?" A voice asked behind him, shock laced in the tone.

Arthur turned his head and was greeted by Merlin, wearing strange clothes but with the same blue eyes and dark hair and ridiculous ears. He was gripping a satchel wearily, looking at Arthur with a kind of fear and hope.

"Merlin," Arthur said, smiling. "You're such an idiot."

And Merlin grinned brightly, hope shinning in his eyes . . . which finally looked peaceful.

A/N: And that, my dear readers, is definitely the end. I really can't write any more to this, and I don't think there will be a sequel. I haven't written it, and I won't promise it. Thank you so much to every person who reviewed, and special thanks to NightsAnger, who actually gave me motivation to spit this last chunk out. I didn't expect the feedback I got for this fic, and I appreciate everyone who took the time to favorite/follow/review. I like this last chapter, and I hope you all did, too. Thank you all once again.