Chapter 5: the truth
After reading the last letter that Mallory had wrote to him, Badger had decided that maybe it was best that she had moved on from him even if it was with Jake. Which made him drew up the conclusion that he was going to back off and not pursue anything more than a friendship with her, it was the lest he could do after everything he done to her. He now understand why she was doing what she was doing plus her reaction to hiM coming back.
For the next couple of weeks, Badger had kept his distance from Mallory by finishing all of his work and chores early so that by the she came to hers they wouldn't clash. He also eat his dinner while having very little conversation with her and when Jake was over, Badger would stay as far as he could from them. He knew that she wouldn't understand why he was doing this but it was the only way he could think of that would hurt the less. Despite everything that Ty was telling him about this idea of his
" I'm just saying that how do you know that this is what she wanted? I mean when she finds out, she will go crazy at you man" Ty said as he was driving them to Heartland coming from a farm that he had been on with Scott, Badger had went to see if he needed help or otherwise known as hiding
" you didn't read those letters, and add that with her behaviour when I first came back it equals that I became friends with her it would cause a lot of trouble. I don't want trouble, you should know that" he said as he looked out of the window, not wanting to look at Ty
" maybe not, but you don't know that unless you tell the truth about what happened and why you decided to cut her off completely twice" he said as he slowed his truck while he gathered the post from the letter box at the Heartland gate
" I can't tell her the truth, are you crazy? She'll think I'm some no good hoodlum, she'll be disappointed in me. Plus how am I meant to tell her, she's not you" he sad as he turned to face him as he looked for some magical fix this, even though he knew if he told it would get messy
" meaning I've similar mistakes and get it? Yeah but Mallory knows you and your background so this shouldn't be that bad, plus your forgetting one major issue, Jake" he said as he stop the trunk a second time as they came to the drive way in front of the house where Mallory and Jake were sitting cuddling and kissing
" anyways it's not only who she'll be mad at, theres me plus she'll tell Amy and we'll be in trouble more so if we delay t anymore" he said as he though about how trouble it would cause
" how would Amy be mad I mean she already know? I know I need to but maybe I can write a letter to her" he said hopefully but knew it had to be done face to face
" she does but if Mallory is hurt, she'll blame you then me from keeping it from her. And we both how easy it is not to read a letter" he said as he pointed out their previous mistakes to Badger
" yeah I know, it's not like I can ask her to choose me and break up with him even if I tell her the truth and she's fine with it. So there's no point, unless you're about suggest that I do something to show my love for her" he said slightly humorous as he kept his eyes on them while they were blissfully unaware that they were being watched
" well now that you mention it, there is I know for fact that Mallory and Jake are going to the barn dance. Why don't you go and oh I don't know make her jealous or something, you could even have fun" he said as he smiled at the thought of the city kid enjoying a barn dance
" sure I'll think about it! But for now I'll just keep up with my own plan, see you at dinner" he said as he got out of the truck and after a quick glance at Mallory he went to his loft
Mallory had began to notice that Badger has been avoiding her and just he had glance at her but hurried away to hide in his loft. She didn't understand why he was behaving this way towards, for her nothing had changed except that she was now with Jake but Badger knew about that. She couldn't bear with the idea that she had something to hurt and she didn't know what. She then decided that if he was still acting weird she would ask him but she knew she was afraid of the answer or the fix
At dinner neither one of them spoke to the anyone at the dinner table, although everyone could sense that something was wrong between them but they all kept up polite conversation till dinner was over. When both Mallory and Badger went to their rooms to have some alone time while thinking about the other, Mallory felt guilty about thinking about other guy when she was with Jake so she decided to text him
( hey what are our plans for tomorrow? I mean I think I have to go dress shopping with A,y but I could meet up with you after xoxox M)
( I actually plans, I mean I have roping practice then i sign up for this rodeo I want to compete in xoxox J)
( oh ok, wait what rodeo? Wait you're not thinking about doing roping and whatever Caleb has been teaching you, I've seen him after a rodeo he is always messed up xoxox M) Mallory began to panic slightly
( well yeah but I'll be carefully don't worry! xoxox J)
She threw her on the bed, not wanting to talk to him, deciding to go to bed early tonight as she went to her drawers and get her pyjamas out. Once she was changed, she crawled into bed confused as ever as she thought how much easier it would be she could either forget about Badger or cleanly break up with Jake so she wouldn't need to see him get hurt by either her or the rodeo. Soon she drifted onto a slow and slightly peacefully sleep
Later that night, Badger decided that Mallory should know the truth while everyone else was in bed and he figured that he would have to tell her tonight before he lost his nerve to tell her. He went to the trunk that sat at the bottom of his bed and got a flashlight as he opened the loft door and began flashing the light into her window. He saw her slowly come to the window as he gestured her to up to his loft
" what?" she said as she came up the final stair while drawing out her words due how tired she was. He noticed that she must have just got up, judging by her appearance
" I need to tell you something and you have let me finish, the reason I never answer your letters or text or call you back was because I didn't want to disappoint you by telling the truth ... Which is that I fell back into my old ways and got into some trouble, I didn't go to art school I was too scared and by the time I was ready it was too late, I missed too much... Long story short that's why I'm here" he said as he continued to look his feet and at the floor, refusing to look at her and see the disappointment in her eyes
" wait what kinda of trouble did you get into? Oh my god!, is that why you kept calling Ty and not me?" she said as she walked towards his bed to sit as head began to spin with a million questions
" me and some old friends of mine tried to break into this place where this guy had gotten one of them into big trouble so we decided to go in and just mess the place up but he was waiting for us and the police... Anyways I got off lightly" he said as he joined her on the bed as she shifted slightly
" you got put on probation which is why you're here, where do Ty fit into all of this?" she said as her voice grew slightly harder as she became less like the bubbly girl everyone knew her as
" before they decided where they were going to place me for my probation, I called Ty for some advice because I knew I screwed up and I knew he wouldn't or more couldn't judge and he came up to see me a couple of times and spoke on my behalf which is why I was placed here so he could look after me and become my mentor" he said as he turn to face her as she became more and more hurt by his words
" you think I would judge you? I can't believe you guys! What about art school?" she said as she moved away from him slightly at the thought that he didn't trust her
" no of course I just didn't want you to think badly of me or for you to look at me any other way than what I was used to. For art school, I couldn't go to classes because I wasn't allowed to go out of my group home" he said as he reached for her hand, she knew that she had to say something but didn't know what
" but I'm trying so hard to change, I mean I've been worked so hard here and even been learning how to ride a horse plus I'm going to Calgary university with Ty when school start to do a art program. I don't want to be that person anymore" he said after a while when she didn't respond
" I get that and I know that you are I mean Jack has only nice things to say about you but I still don't get why you couldn't just call me and tell me! Why now?" she said as she began to cry and slight yell as she got up from the bed
"I read your letters a couple of weeks ago and i realised that when I though I was protecting you I was hurt you more, plus I realised something else ... That I ..." he said as he gently took her hands while her big brown eyes continued to fill up with tears and hurt
" what, you what?" she said almost whispering as she look up at him as she searched his eyes for the answer
" I've fallen in love with you" he said as one of his hands began to stroke her face gently, as she heard his words she blinked as all of her tears came at once as her world began to fall apart
Mallory couldn't take anymore of this, she felt as if someone had crushed her heart into a million pieces. She began to run out of the loft as she heard Badger shout her name while he ran after her but stopped once he got to the barn as she was closer to the house. Once she was in the house, she ran to her room and slightly slamming the door where she began to slowly slide down towards the floor. She began to sob gently as her whole body began to shake as her tears began to fall faster while her heart began to quietly break.
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