Chapter Seven: Still on the Good Part
Joxnstar eventually got himself untangled from the brambles and the apprentices and he went back to the camp to tell everyone the exciting news. He wanted to create a battle patrol, but first he realized he was so incompetent that he forgot to give the apprentices mentors. Joxnstar called all of the clan to a meeting.
"Tahsisleaf, pass your abstract thinking and adaptivity towards Joepaw. Sethwhisker, pass your intuition and amazing memory to Rainpaw. Maxpad, you just suck rat genitalia so you can pass absolutely nothing to Waynepaw, but we don't have enough warriors. Hopepaw, you will be mentored by me and I will pass on my good looks and charisma." Joxnstar announced.
Rainpaw cheered, Waynepaw groaned, and Hopepaw pretended to claw her throat out. Joepaw didn't notice anything happened because he was zoning out.
"You need a well attitude to become a well warrior." Maxpad the grouchy mcgrouch-face reprimanded.
"You need a good attitude to suck my cat penis." Waynepaw responded.
"Woah, that was way out of character," Joepaw remarked.
"I have an announcement to make." announced Joxnstar. "Your first lesson with your new mentors will be in battle with RiverClan. A patrol has just informed me that RiverClan cats are gathering on our border next to the river. I want all the apprentices on the front line of battle."
"Man, I'm so excited! A real battle!" exclaimed the apprentices. Soon, the Twincestclan warriors were gathered by the river. They could see the glaring eyes and flickering tails and hear the hisses and screeches of their enemies. Tahsisleaf and the apprentices shivered in anticipation.
And suddenly, just like that, the battle began. Cats ran across the river, scratching and clawing. A RiverClan warrior pinned Joxnstar to the ground. Joxnstar tried summoning his pirate powers, but whenever he launched a jet of water at a RiverClan cat, the RiverClan cat simply swam through it. The RiverClan warrior was just about to claw out Joxnstar's throat when Tahsisleaf screeched, "Nooooo!"
Tahsisleaf flipped over onto his back and spread his hind legs apart. Suddenly, Tahsisleaf shot out a giant kitten and hit the RiverClan warrior right in the head. Tahsisleaf had a magical power too!
"Yes!" shouted Tahsisleaf. "Headshot!" The battle ensued, with cats fighting and Tahsisleaf shooting kittens at other cats. Soon, the battle was finished and Twincestclan had won. Tahsisleaf collected the three kits that survived out of all the ones he shot out and Joxnstar purred. "Our first litter, Tahsisleaf" he mewed, entwining his tail with Tahsisleaf's.
"I name them Carlokit, Erickit, and Reinerkit" Tahsisleaf mewed. "Welcome, join us" mewed the other Twincest queens in union.