Chapter 9: Yesterday

When Morgan opened his door and saw Reid, he was taken aback. There Reid stood, looking a bit nervous with his tousled hair and his lips tucked into his mouth. Morgan quickly put up his guard, holding his yogurt cup in his steady hand as he gripped the top of the door with the other. He wondered what the kid had to say for himself.

Reid tried to look Morgan in the eye, but damn it… it was so difficult. Not only did he look annoyed, but he was only wearing gray sweatpants and it was obvious that he wasn't wearing underwear. And then he had to go and stretch his hard body when he reached for the top of the door. Reid took a moment to close his eyes and swallow before he took a deep breath. "You matter to me," he told Morgan, finally able to meet his firm stare.

Morgan eyed Reid with a raised brow. He remained standing in his doorway and watched Reid while Reid patiently waited for some kind of reply. "That's not good enough."

Well, that wasn't a favorable reply, Reid thought, as he lowered his head. Discouraged, he gave up for about two seconds, but then he took another deep breath. He couldn't let this fall apart so completely. He needed to stand his ground and make it clear to Morgan that he still very much wanted a relationship with him. "I said I'm not walking away. In fact, I'm here at your doorstep because I miss you."

Morgan sighed. "You're getting warmer."

Reid let a smile slip out. "Can we get some coffee or something?"

Clooney ambled to the doorway, stood beside Morgan, sniffed the air in Reid's direction and let out a sudden bark. "Git 'em, boy!" Morgan teased once he'd noticed Reid had flinched, but Clooney stayed next to his master. "Cynophobia, right? Isn't that what they call it?"

Reid smirked knowing that Morgan was teasing him. The dog barked again and Morgan leaned down and patted him on his head. "Good boy. Go on, now," Morgan told him, pointing back into the house. Clooney let out a soft whine and headed back to where he came from.

"Let me get dressed. Come on in and have a seat."

Reid shook his head. "I'll wait out here."

"Chicken shit," Morgan kidded just before he closed the door leaving Reid outside.

They were quiet as Morgan drove them to a local cafe. Once inside and seatedReid just asked for coffee while Morgan ordered a full meal along with his coffee.

"Maya made breakfast for me this morning," Reid began to explain, but once he saw the look on Morgan's face, he felt like the biggest asshole. "Uhh… I, uhh…" he stumbled, "Oh, man," he mumbled as he wiped his face with his hand. He pulled his collar away from his neck. "Anyway… so, I'm sorry about that phone call earlier. I couldn't sleep and—"

"You were at Michael's when you called me?" Morgan knew the answer, but he wanted Reid to face it.

Reid's eyes shifted side to side while he looked at the tabletop, "Yeah…"

"Was he sleeping next to you when you called me?"

After a few slightly challenging seconds, Reid glanced at Morgan and saw that, 'I'm teaching you something about yourself' expression on Morgan's face and it ticked him off a little bit.

Morgan leaned back into the booth and waited to make eye contact. "You got some nerve, you know that?"

"I'm not discussing Michael with you."

"You had the audacity to fuck him and then turn right around and call me because you missed me."

Reid glanced around the cafe before he spoke, making certain no one could hear their conversation, "Think what you will, but I'm not discussing Michael with you," Reid iterated.

"It was that good, huh?" Morgan mumbled as the server set his turkey sandwich down in front of him.

Reid smiled politely as she set down his coffee cup and filled it. She filled Morgan's cup next. "Sorry for the delay on the coffee. I had to wait for the pot to finish."

"Quite alright," Morgan flashed an intoxicating grin her way. "Can I get some water too, please?"

"Anything for you, handsome," she blushed. "Are you sure you don't want anything?" she double- checked with Reid.

Reid looked directly across the table at his lover. "No thank you, I just ate."

"Alrighty," she smiled and walked away.

Morgan chuckled as he chewed on his first bite. "You're a real piece of work."

"Likewise," Reid stated not looking up, as he fixed up his coffee.

"Tell me about Maya, then."

"She's a very smart and beautiful woman," Reid said flatly.

"…And?"

"And nothing, Morgan. Drop it," Reid ordered. He leaned over the tabletop slightly and spoke quietly, but deliberately. "I didn't come over so we could talk about who I'm having sex with or who my new friends are or so you can psycho-analyze my every step."

Morgan didn't say another word. He just took a drink of his coffee and another bite of his sandwich.

"If you don't understand that then… then we are done."

Morgan nearly choked on the lump of bread and meat he was about to swallow. He coughed and grabbed his water and took a couple drinks. He cleared his throat and took another drink.

Reid just glared at him. After finally looking away, he let out a quick sigh, "Why can't we just have a conversation? Why do you have to pick a fight at every single turn?"

Morgan pursed his lips and sighed through his nose. His fingertips held onto the glass of water as he tipped it onto its edge. "Maybe cuz I'm tired of going around in circles," he told Reid and then cleared his throat again while he watched Reid fidget.

Touché. Reid felt that jab and it made his stomach flip. He heard how tired Morgan was in his voice. Not the physical type of tired. It was the emotionally drained type of tired and it scared Reid. He scratched at his nose and then fingered his hair behind his ear with his right hand. "Let's…" his voice cracked and he stopped speaking, afraid of sounding like he was upset. He cleared his throat quietly and tried again, "Let's not say anything more to each other for a few minutes."

Why? Morgan didn't understand why Reid was putting himself through this. He really felt like every single ball was in Reid's court, so he wanted to respect his request and not argue, but something dawned on him and he felt it needed to be said. He reached his hand across the table and opened it. Reid stared at it and then timidly rested his hand inside of Morgan's. "As cheesy as this sounds… I think we fight because we have something worth fighting for."

Reid agreed with him and it made his heart swell. "I know I'm making this extraordinarily difficult, Morgan," Reid whispered as he leaned forward closing his eyes and bringing Morgan's hand to his mouth and kissing it.

Suddenly self-conscious of their actions Morgan glanced around and began getting out of the booth. "I gotta hit the head. I'll be right back."

Reid didn't take Morgan's quick departure personally. Instead, he used the alone time to collect himself. Kissing Morgan's hand like he did was a moment weakness - an uncontrolled reaction to Morgan's affection. He wasn't upset with himself over it, but his heart felt like it was beating fast enough to take flight. It was such a scary and exhilarating feeling. He wanted to calm down… he needed to.

As he sat and waited, he unintentionally thought about his night planned with Michael and Maya, which only made him feel embarrassed again over losing his erection. He wondered if Michael was right about why and that only made him wonder if Morgan was right about everything else. He felt sweat on his forehead at the same moment he noticed how rapidly he was bouncing his leg up and down. He jumped a little when Morgan grabbed his arm and said his name.

"What?"

"Follow me…"

Reid stood up and got out his wallet to lay a twenty down on the table. Then he hurried to follow Morgan into a hallway where the bathrooms were. But then Morgan pulled Reid into a utility closet and finally through an exit door that led outside into an alley behind the cafe.

Reid had heard this song before. He let Morgan push him against the brick wall and he grabbed Morgan's face as the two shared an intense and sloppy kiss…

But then Morgan unexpectedly pulled back.

"What?" Reid asked as his chest heaved up and down. "What is it?"

"You smell different." His expression was a mixture of disappointment and disgust.

Reid looked at Morgan with guilty eyes. His mouth had been on another man. He'd slept in another man's bed. He hadn't brushed his teeth or showered… He couldn't say anything in defense or protest. Not one single, damn thing. To top it all off, he then remembered Michael's dried ejaculate had landed somewhere in his hair. He felt dirty. "Punish me."

Morgan stared hard and so intently at Reid that he didn't even flinch when the thunder boomed in the skies above them. But then he suddenly smiled, "You're kidding me, right?" Then his smile flat lined and he nearly glared at Reid.

Reid's eyes squinted and he cocked his head slightly, wondering why not. Morgan always seemed playful and Reid really thought Morgan would take advantage of this moment. Reid wanted him to, but it didn't look like it was in the cards. And it was because of Michael.

Morgan sighed and looked up at the darkening skies. "Let's go."

Morgan's wipers were on full speed as the SUV got pelted with water falling from the sky. Reid ducked to look out the windshield at the storm above them right as lightning flashed in the clouds off in the distance. "Wow…" he breathed.

Soon they reached Morgan's home. When he parked, neither of them tried to get out of the vehicle. "This is insane." Morgan glanced Reid's direction and then tried to look out the windshield. "You remember the last time we got caught up in a storm like this?"

"Like it was yesterday," Reid smiled.

Morgan could feel it. That day was coming back to him. He blinked slowly, letting his eyes close to help him deal with the tingling he felt in his groin. It never ceased to amaze him. Reid's look, his scent, and the sounds he made when he… Morgan pushed down on his crotch. Everything about the man sitting next to him in that vehicle made him squirm. "Yeah, same here."

Reid's eyes cut toward Morgan several times, not really sure what to do next; he seemed content and Reid didn't want to interrupt that. "I better go…"

"What? Why?" Morgan's hand had quickly grabbed Reid's.

That was unexpected. Reid looked at their hands as they each squeezed their grip just a bit tighter. "I don't know. I don't want to make things worse."

Morgan chuckled. "We're in love and you're insisting on a relationship with someone else… I'm not sure how things could get any worse."

Reid's lips twitched and he pulled his hand away from Morgan's. "Like I said."

"You gonna go back there tonight?"

Reid swallowed and stared at the stereo as he answered. "Yes."

"God, damn it," Morgan hissed as he shook his head. He suddenly opened his door and stepped out into the rain without any hesitation.

"Shit," Reid cursed, knowing this tiny moment was too good to be true. He followed suit, opening his door and immediately stepping out into the heavy rain. He slammed the door shut and moved around the front of the vehicle as quickly as he could. "Morgan!" he called.

Morgan stopped and turned around, walking right back toward Reid to confront him. "We're done here, Reid! Go home and get ready for your date."

Reid just stood there, getting soaked as he watched Morgan turn his back and walk to the front door of his home, disappearing behind it. After that, he just couldn't get himself to move. He remained standing in place for two full minutes going over and over in his mind the events of their relationship. He tried to pin point the exact moment that everything began to go wrong and before he could finish his thoughts, he found himself walking to Morgan's doorstep. He knocked once and got no answer. He knocked again.

Morgan finally came to the door. "Reid… Christ, what are you doing?" His eyes looked Reid up and down, watching as the water dripped from his hair, his jaw line, his hands…

Reid noted Morgan's quick change back into his sweat pants and he looked away for a second. "Are we okay?" he asked as he met Morgan's eyes.

Morgan leaned on the edge of the doorway and raked his thumbnail over his brow. He shook his head, frustrated with Reid. "Why?"

"Well," Reid tucked his lips into his mouth as Morgan interrupted him.

"No matter what I do or say, you're gonna do whatever the hell you want."

"Because you said you'll put up with me until the end of your days," he quoted back to Morgan. "At the very least, I assumed you meant while I'm figuring this out."

Morgan almost grinned and not because he was happy; he was mad as hell. "Within reason, Reid. It wasn't an invitation for you to walk all over me."

Reid's Adam's apple dropped deeply down the front of his neck. He hated to upset Morgan. "It… I'm not committed to either one of you. I'm single. I can do what I want, when I want and with whom I want. I thought you understood that. This isn't easy for me or fun-"

Morgan almost laughed in response. He really had nothing more to say to Reid. "Chop, chop!" he clapped his hands. "Time's a-wastin'!"

Reid watched him carefully, able to tell that Morgan was possibly moments away from letting himself get angry enough to not to mask it with his sarcasm.

"Just say what you want to say, Morgan." Behind him, the rain had suddenly stopped and the sun burst through the clouds above the neighborhood. It created a beautiful glow inside of Morgan's angry eyes.

Morgan smirked and shook his head again. "Trust me kid, you don't want that right now." And with that he closed the door on Reid.

I know I've taken forever to post and I'm so sorry! Good news is I have the next 2 and ½ chapters nearly ready for a final edit! Hang in there! This is about to get good! :D