A/N: Quick note because I know a number of you were confused. Around three weeks passed last chapter, which would put Bella around 23-24 weeks pregnant. In that time period, she had a sonogram. No, you didn't miss it. I didn't show it. Edward was there and supportive, but this was during the time he was trying to process and let go of his grief. There wasn't anything you would have wanted to hear during that scene, trust, so I didn't write it.

Very few methods of announcing something were more effective than hanging an unobtrusive image in his office at work.

Bella had given him one of the sonogram images weeks before. He'd kept it in a drawer at his office. When he got to work that Monday morning, he propped the thing up just below his monitor. All of twenty minutes later his assistant noticed, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head. Within an hour, people were making excuses to visit his office.

When, Edward wondered, had he turned himself into such a freak show? He understood why it was such a novelty. Sullen Cullen. They all knew his story. When he'd started at the company he'd been a fresh-faced newlywed, a novice with pictures of his beautiful wife and adoring family all over his tiny cubicle. There were people at the company who'd clapped him on the back when they found out his wife was expecting and who'd stopped and listened good naturedly to his endless fascination with fatherhood after his baby was born.

Of course, they were the same people who welcomed him back with sincere condolences when he returned from his leave of absence after his son died. They were the people who had watched him throw himself into his work. He had a huge office now, but it was barren. Newer employees eventually asked why he never smiled, and they were told the whole sordid tale-whatever warped version of it had been passed on by that point anyway. Edward had heard several variations as the story was retold.

So he supposed he understood their curiosity at this newest addition to the otherwise blank canvas of his wallspace. He wondered who would be brave enough to attempt the awkward conversation first.

In the end, it was his boss. Alistair Masters strode into his office a little before noon and sat down. He was a quiet man but very direct. He leaned forward in his seat and reached out for the sonogram. "May I?" he asked.

A nervous energy twisted in the pit of Edward's stomach. He nodded. Alistair picked up the sonogram. It was a double picture-one of a side view of the baby, the typical blurry baby shape, and the other a picture with the pertinent bits circled in red.

"It's a girl," Alistair said.

Edward nodded.

"Yours?"

Edward nodded again.

Alistair studied him a moment before he smiled. "Congratulations."

Edward felt his lips tug up at the corner. Before he knew it, he was grinning broadly. It took him a few confused seconds to identify the rush that went through him as excitement. With Alistair's simple acknowledgment, he remembered why babies were supposed to be a good thing.

"Thank you," he said

~0~

What a strange thing love was.

When Edward was in his twenties, love made sense. Kate was gorgeous-electric. She was smart, and they were well-matched. They had a beautiful life together, but love wasn't strong enough to save their marriage. It wasn't enough to help them ease the pain of their grief together.

Now love made no sense at all. Oh, Bella was beautiful. She was smart and strong. She was also twenty years old and barely figuring herself out. And he was in love with her. A head over heels, intense love he hadn't experienced before.

More than that, he was well aware he hadn't begun to let himself heal for his daughter's sake. No. It was his love for Bella that had touched him in that hollow pit that used to hold his warm, beating heart. It seemed wrong he couldn't get better for his wife and yet for this girl…

A few weeks ago, when his mother had first told him she thought Bella was bringing him back to life, she'd said, "If life was fair and everything happened as we intended, you and Bella would never have met. It's because the world isn't fair that you make sense. You still deserve to be happy, Edward, and someone should teach that poor girl she deserves to be cherished."

Now, Edward leaned against the wall, watching Bella as she made dinner. She wasn't aware he'd come home, and she hummed to herself, shimmying a bit. It was a nice thing to come home to.

She was supposed to move back into the dorms in a few days.

Edward pushed off the wall and went to her. She gasped but quickly relaxed as he wrapped his arms around her. He splayed his hands over her belly and smiled against her hair. "How's my baby today?"

The words still sounded awkward in his mouth, but the pain that twisted in his gut was bearable. Bella turned her head, obviously still a touch surprised by this change in him. She studied him, and smiled, pressing up on her tiptoes to kiss him. "She's fine."

"And you?"

"Fine." She put her hand to his cheek. "How was work?"

His lips twitched. "Interesting." He took her hand from his cheek and kissed her knuckles before he dropped it to the side. "Come talk with me."

"But dinner…"

She looked sheepish, and he chuckled. "You're right," he said. "I know better than to stand between a pregnant woman and dinner."

Her cheeks flushed, and she elbowed him playfully. He let her go. "Can I help?" Edward asked.

"I have it under control." She stepped back to the stove. "Can you talk while I cook?"

Edward pulled a chair out from the kitchen table, spun it around, and sat. "I think I can handle that." He rested his chin on the back of the chair, watching her again. "Bella, how do you really feel about going back to the dorms? Is that what you want?"

She faltered a moment in what she was doing but recovered. "The dorms were never my favorite place," she said, her tone quiet as she stared into the pot she was stirring. "The hallways are crowded, and people have personal space issues." She looked over her shoulder, giving him a smile that was weak at best. "It's just a place to live, you know?"

Edward remembered Jasper telling him how quiet Bella was around the other students. She tried so hard not to let the aftereffects of what Mike had done control her. "Bella, I'd really like it if you'd consider staying here with me instead of in the dorms. At least, I think it'd be better to be some place less hectic."

"You worried I'm going to take the baby to a kegger?" she asked, though her voice was too shaky to convey the proper humor.

"You'll be twenty-one in a few more weeks, after all," he said, teasing to lighten the heavy mood that had come over them.

For a few long seconds, she kept her eyes studiously on the pot, as though stirring it took all her concentration. She cleared her throat. "I think I've crowded you for long enough."

"You're not crowding me." Edward tapped his foot in a restless, nervous tempo. There was a lot he wanted to say, but he opted for the rational first. "I know we haven't talked about the future, and that's my fault. I've been dealing with all of this one day at a time. That wasn't fair to you, and you've been patient with me long enough."

At that she finally glanced at him, meeting his eyes. "It's been a one day at a time thing for me, too."

"But that kind of planning isn't going to cut it for very much longer."

She pushed the pot off the burner and leaned against the counter. She looked at him again, uncertainty in her eyes. "What do you really want?"

That was a loaded question, and the answer was difficult to articulate. There was still that part of him that resisted. It was a small part, getting smaller every day, but it resented Bella and her place in his life vehemently. He was well aware the way he'd lived his life the last ten years was anything but healthy. To this point, he simply hadn't cared. Why should he move on? Why should he start to heal and let his precious memories get fuzzy around the edges?

Bella was the answer to that question. Bella and the hope of all the life he had left to live.

Edward stood and went to stand beside her, his hand to the small of her back. "I want you to stay. Not only because I'd worry about you, but because I love you. I'm in love with you. It's been so long since I've even thought about wanting anything, but I want you. I want to be with you."

He swallowed hard, and pressed his tongue to the roof of his mouth to stop his babbling. Once upon a time he'd been a cocky, college kid sure of his own charms. Now he had no idea what he was doing, and Bella was still staring straight ahead.

"Please say something," he said when he couldn't take it anymore. He drew his hand up her back and squeezed her arm.

To his surprise and horror, she recoiled away from him. She stumbled a few steps, wrapping her arms around herself and staring at him with fear in her eyes. "Bella," he began, but when he took a step forward, she jerked back again.

She bent at the waist and closed her eyes. "Fuck. I, I, I, I'm sorry. This isn't... I don't..." She shuddered. "It's just really loud in my head right now."

"Okay." Edward's voice was rough around the painful lump in his throat. "Are you scared of me?"

"No. No." She blew out a sharp breath. "At least, I don't want to be."

"But?"

She bit her lip, and when she opened her eyes, he could see the tears there. "I've been sleeping in your bed. I've slept with you. I touch you and kiss you." She gulped. "I know what that means, what it says." She looked away from him, her lips pressed together.

It took Edward a few tense seconds to read between the lines of what she was saying. He had to remember the only thing she knew about relationships. They'd only had sex three times. Twice she'd initiated it. The third it was her gift when he needed to feel alive again, when he needed something as consuming as the pain he was in. She'd always been in control.

"Bella, do you mean you feel if we were together, I'd take sex whenever I wanted it?"

She flinched and shuddered, but she didn't deny it.

"You don't owe me anything, not for any reason," Edward said, wishing more than anything he could go to her. "I'd never take anything from you that you didn't want to give."

She exhaled in a long gust and closed her eyes again. "Fuck. I'm sorry."

"You don't-"

"No, I do. I'm a fucking basket case." She huffed, shaking her head, not looking at him. "On the one hand, there's a beautiful boy, and I'm in love with him. He's amazing, and we're going to have a baby. I have daydreams that we'll be a happy a family, and I want that more than I've wanted anything."

She sniffed and chafed her arms. "But I don't know how to believe I can have that. I'm so messed up, Edward. I don't know how to trust what I feel. When I left Forks, I promised myself I wouldn't even think about dating and relationships until I'd figured myself out. I don't want to define myself as part of a unit before I know who I am on my own.

"I want both. I want you so much it scares me. I also wish all of this, if it had to happen, had happened maybe a few years down the line, after I had a life of my own and I was sure I'd never let what that asshole did to me happen ever again."

Edward took a tentative step toward her, not wanting to make her uncomfortable. When she didn't move away he took another step. He put a hand to her waist, and she turned into his embrace. She laid her head on his chest and looped her arms around him.

He swayed them for a minute, rubbing his hands up and down her back. "There's no rush. There's a lot I have to figure out before I could fully commit to anyone." He shifted and cupped his hand under her chin, tilting her head up. "I can give you all the space you need." He brushed her hair back. "I love you. That's just fact. Love doesn't ask permission before it fucks with your head, but that doesn't mean we're a forgone conclusion.

"If you don't want to stay with me, I understand. I still don't think you should go back to the dorms, though. I meant what I said a long time ago. I will support you so you can go to school. There's no reason to put that off until after the baby is born. We could look for a nice apartment. Two bedrooms, so that way we can get ready for the baby. Or..."

"Or?" Her hands were warm on his back.

Edward smiled at her, a gentle smile. "A compromise. I told you earlier this summer you could have the spare room. You still can, and then I'd be here to help you when you get so big it's hard to reach things. I want to make things as easy as possible for you. And we could get ready for the baby together."

She looked up at him, and the tense set of her body relaxed. "I think I'd like that." Uncertainty flitted across her features, and she ducked her head, playing with one of the buttons on his shirt. "I'm sorry for being so crazy when we've basically been living like that for months."

"Please don't apologize for what you need. I'm a mess. I'm no prize, and you've been more understanding than I deserve. You've been through so much that never should have happened. There are going to be repercussions to that." He ducked his head to look in her eyes. "Your fears aren't who you are."

He kissed her forehead and stepped away, taking her hand to lead her back to the table. "How about we start with dinner? Sit down. I'll serve."

~0~

Bella was quiet that evening, and Edward did his best to give her room to think. They watched TV together, though he suspected she wasn't really listening. She sat alone in the recliner, her legs drawn up and her expression far off.

Then, apropos of nothing, she got up. She took the remote from his hands, turned the TV off and climbed into his lap. Edward wrapped his arms around her automatically and twirled a lock of her hair around his finger.

"I think I need to tell you something, because I know how I acted tonight isn't how you're supposed to act when someone tells you they want to be your boyfriend." She looked at him. "That was what you were asking, wasn't it?"

A small smile tugged at his lips. "More or less, but Bella, you don't—"

She put her hands over his mouth. "I really need to tell you."

Dropping her hands to her lap, she took a deep breath. "It's just that… with Mike… I don't know. I don't want to say I was confused into a relationship, but maybe that's the best way to explain it. I wasn't sure I wanted his attention but part of me liked it. Then, I wasn't sure I wanted him to kiss me, but part of me liked it. It was what any girl should have wanted, wasn't it? For someone to tell them they were pretty and to be touched. To be wanted."

She trembled. Her skin had broken out in gooseflesh. Edward reached behind them, pulling a blanket that rested on the back of the couch to drape it over her shoulders as she spoke. She had to swallow several times before she could speak again. "It wasn't always bad, you know? He was sweet a lot of the time, and I liked a lot of what we did." The color had drained from her face, and her voice was a thin, wavering thing. "He started to push me, and he made it make sense. Why was I kissing him if I didn't want more? That was how people showed they loved each other, and didn't he say over and over again that he loved me?

"So one night, we were texting, and I told him point blank I didn't want to. Not yet, I said."

She shook. Hard. Edward's heart began to pound, because he was sure he wasn't going to like what happened next. He closed his eyes and held her closer, tighter to him.

"He just…appeared in my house. In my room. I couldn't even speak, I was so surprised. And scared. But it was confusing, because I was a little excited, too.

"He said I was being ridiculous, and everyone had sex. Sex was good, and it's not like other people disagree. Sometimes, I felt like the only girl in my school who hadn't had sex. And there was a part of me who believed him when he said he was the only one who could see how special I was. It wasn't like boys were falling all over themselves to have sex with me, and he was older. He wasn't going to be clumsy or bad, and he didn't mind if I was."

"What a prince," Edward said through gritted teeth.

"Yeah." She rested her head on his shoulder, still trembling. "So, he was there in my room, and I was tongue-tied. And then he was all over me. He kissed me. He said, 'I love you, baby. I want to make love to you.' I tried to relax. I kissed him back, but then I got scared again. And I tried to get away, but he caught me when I tried to move around him. He pushed me down on the bed. His words were sweet, but he wouldn't let me get up. He said he'd show me. All I said the whole time was no. Just once."

"He never should have pressured you at all, let alone gone as far as he did." It was nothing she didn't know, but Edward couldn't help saying it. If he ever met the bastard...

Bella was quiet for a minute. "A lot of people don't have good first times. I knew that. And that's what I told myself. He was an older guy. It was what he'd expect. And I wanted to be grown up for him.

"Anyway. That was...After that, we were just together. Like I was claimed. Like I was his." She shuddered. "I just… I had these fantasies about what it would be like to get into a relationship with someone who wasn't like Mike. I wanted it to be special." She sighed. "And then I was the one to fuck it up."

Edward hugged her to him and kissed the top of her head. "There's time, Bella. Neither one of us is going to be perfect, but we're going to have some beautiful moments." He let his hand drift to cup her belly. "And no matter what happens with us, we're always going to have this beautiful baby."

"Yeah," she said, putting her hand over his. She raised her head. "I do love you, you know."

He smiled and answered by kissing her gently.

A/N: Many thanks to my lovely ladies who are oh so patient with me.

Quick personal note. In case you missed it, I released my third novel, Finding Purgatory, yesterday. :) It's available on Amazon. To celebrate, Duplicity and One To Tell The Grandkids are both free until Friday. Links are in my profile.

Thank you all so much for your support.