It was the morning of the presentation for Roch-BEC and Rachel's blood pressure was through the roof as she walked into school. "Morning," said Eddie, his voice still rough with sleep.
"Don't tell me you've forgotten!" she asked, noticing that he wasn't exactly dressed for the occasion.
"Uh, no. We're pitching Rochdale Business and Enterprise Centre ("Roch-BEC") to the DFES, which is why I'm out of my bed an hour earlier than usual." Rachel tried not to grin at the throatiness of his tone.
"You could've put on a tie or something," she teased, walking ahead of him into her office.
"Well, if that's what's gonna swing it, maybe it wasn't such a good idea after all!" he joked, following her through the door and grinning, "Hi Bridget."
She kept walking at a pace into her little room, stress evident in her body language. "Hey look, shall we have a go at this presentation? Wait, where's your stuff?"
"I know what I'm going to say, I just want it to come out naturally," he told her, trying to calm her down by placing his hand on her shoulder as she looked at him uncertainly.
"Well, I've added a bit to my section," she replied briskly, pulling away as she sat down to open her laptop. "Vocational Learning Entitlement for all pupils. Um, I take it you haven't spoken to your ex-wife yet?" he sighed, his easy smile of seconds earlier contorting into a slight frown. "Shouldn't you?"
He scoffed, "Haven't I said enough about that? Are you worried about this presentation or not?" he questioned, walking over to stand behind her, leaning on the back of her chair. She smiled up at him, her face suddenly relaxed, before leaning back and muttering something about getting on with the bloody thing. He smirked and let go of the chair, hands "accidentally" brushing her hair as he pulled them away. She stood up as he moved back, the chair banging into him as she did so.
"Right, come on we really ought to have a run-through," she told him reluctantly as she clicked onto the first slide.
A couple of slides in, he was already arguing with her. "You don't know how much this will mean to the children of this school, so we're begging you to consider-"
"Hang on a minute! Begging? Are you trying to make us look like a couple of pillocks?"
"Nothing wrong with a bit of sucking up if it works," she argued. Eddie frowned. He didn't like the idea of her begging anyone for anything, never mind a group of lecherous governors.
"There is such a thing as trying too hard," he responded. "Begging…" he rolled his eyes as he left.
Rachel sat back down and began to scrutinise herself with a mirror. Minutes later, she looked up to see Eddie returning in a tie, no less. She beamed when she saw him, his face unamused. "Sorry, had to nip out for something." He saw her smile and gave in. "Aw, it's a one-off okay?"
"And I appreciate it," she told him, "Come here." She stepped forward to adjust his tie and he felt his stomach do a flip. For god's sake, he thought, I'm behaving like one of the bloody kids!
"Rachel, your guests are here," Bridget told her and he watched the mist of worry descend upon her features once more.
"Thank you Bridget," she murmured.
"It'll be fine," Eddie reassured her, pulling her in for a squeeze of reassurance.
"Thank you Eddie," she whispered into his chest, pulling away reluctantly to go and meet the DFES.
She was a good actress, he gave her that. She never let on that she was in the slightest bit nervous or worried as she greeted the committee. Eddie pulled Nigel off to the side, "I think you'll be impressed Nigel, she's a cracking headteacher." The best part was, he meant it. Rachel was incredible.
Rachel's part of the presentation went incredibly well and Eddie was certain they'd get the status Rachel so wanted. He'd just begun his own part of the presentation when Bridget came to the door. "Mr Lawson, there's someone here to see you."
"Bridget, I thought I said absolutely no interruptions!" Rachel said furiously.
"Only, it's your wife." Eddie's heart sunk as he turned to look at Rachel.
"Excuse me," he said, walking out and leaving her to pick up the pieces. He knew Rachel had something to do with this and frankly, he was fuming.
He found Alison just down the corridor and his heart soared when he saw Michael in her arms. "Say hello to your dad," Alison commanded the little boy angrily, shoving him into Eddie's arms.
"Hiya mate," Eddie grinned.
"I've had enough Eddie," said Alison, her arms folded, "he's your problem now." And with that, she went stomping off down the stairs.
"This is stupid! I'm at work, you can't leave him here!" Eddie shouted back furiously.
"No Eddie! I'm done."
"Alison! For fuck's sake, you're being ridiculous! Come back!" He got no reply. "Why are you doing this now?" Suddenly he saw Rachel walking towards him. "She's left him with me!" he told her, disbelievingly.
"Listen, we've got to get on with the presentation," she reminded him, looking close to tears. "I'll get Jasmine to look after him."
"I'm not having another stranger upset him even more!"
"Eddie, did you hear me? We have got to-"
"Rachel, did you hear me?! You have got to present on your own! And if you want someone to blame, blame yourself!"
"I don't know your presentation!" she shouted after him, trying not to cry as Eddie turned and walked away, Michael in his arms.
Back in his office, he looked down at his son in wonder. Maybe this wasn't ideal, but he was thrilled to see his boy. Michael beamed up at him, his head surrounded by a halo of golden curls, his blue eyes wide with confusion. "Do you know who I am, Michael?" he asked, terrified his son wouldn't even recognise him.
"Daddy." Michael replied.
"That's right, I am your daddy and I've missed you. I've missed you so much," he whispered, pulling him tight to his chest, cradling him to his body.
The two of them spent the following hour talking and Eddie discovered that Michael's favourite colour was blue, he liked Thomas the Tank Engine and climbing trees. He pulled out some old photos to show him and pointed, "see, that's you." The little boy nodded shyly. "You didn't know you had a daddy either did you?" he asked.
"No, didn't know." Michael muttered, beaming angelically.
"I'll tell you something, I'm never going to let you out of my sight, ever again, okay?" Michael nodded. "Do you like cars? I've got a 4x4. It's like a big tractor. D'you want to see it?" he asked him.
"Yes please daddy," Michael answered, grabbing Eddie's hand as they stood up to go for a ride. Eddie smiled, elated to have his son back. He meant what he said, he couldn't let himself lose Michael again.
Meanwhile, Rachel was meeting Alison in a café. "Okay," she told the blonde across the table as their coffee arrived, "I've got about five minutes."
"Look, if you're here to plead Eddie's case then-"
"I'm not interested in being a marriage counsellor," Rachel cut in, "but from where I'm standing it looks like you're using your little boy to get back at Eddie."
"What gives you the right to an opinion? You have no idea what I've been through!"
"Well, I've got an inkling because Eddie told me," Rachel told her.
"Oh yeah, I can just imagine his version of events," Alison sneered.
"What I don't think you know is the hell he's been through too," Rachel tried to explain.
"Yeah, must've been really tough," Alison said, her voice laced with sarcasm. "When the only thing you've got to worry about is when the next live football match is on."
"Eddie told me that you had a boyfriend?"
"No, a few months of a screaming baby test the most solid relationships. No, I was the one left with the nappies while Eddie had his freedom." She looked Rachel up and down. "He went out to play the field."
Rachel was amused that Alison would see her as competition, but she carried on. Look, I just think that you two really need to sort this mess out. I really need a deputy I can rely on. So please?"
"Fine, I'll talk to Eddie, but I'm doing this for Michael, not for you and especially not for Eddie." Alison told her, standing up to leave.
"Can I give you a lift to the school?" asked Rachel.
"If you don't mind," said Alison.
"Not at all."
"So what's going on with you and Eddie?" Alison asked Rachel.
"What do you mean?" Rachel asked.
"Are you just dating or is it more serious?"
"Oh no, Eddie and I are just colleagues and… well, friends, I suppose."
"Hmm," said Alison suspiciously, "well if you say so. For what it's worth, I think you're a good match for him."
Rachel laughed at her. "When did you last see Eddie, anyway?"
"I think it was just over a year ago," Alison admitted.
When they pulled up beside Eddie's 4x4 in the carpark, he was in there with Michael, who was pretending to drive it. "I've just got to nip out for a second," Eddie told his son when he caught sight of Alison exiting Rachel's silver Mercedes.
"So what's this all about Alison?" he asked her expectantly.
"Let's talk Eddie," she said.
"Show starts in ten minutes Eddie," Rachel informed him. Then she added quietly, "I really ned you there."
"She's some woman," Alison grinned as both of their gazes followed Rachel walking away.
"Yeah…" Eddie smiled. "Second scariest woman in the world."
Alison giggled, then her face was suddenly serious again. "None of this should've happened. I want to explain why, only it might take a lot longer than ten minutes."
"Come on then. We'll talk later, for now why don't we take Michael to see the show?" he asked.
"Okay, but we do need to discuss this. Rachel was right."
"She generally is," Eddie agreed.
"So what's the deal with you and Rachel then?" Alison asked him mockingly.
"We're just good friends," Eddie assured her.
"Well I'm glad you two have your cover story straight with each other in any case," Alison smirked, scooping Michael up as they set off into school.
Rachel saw Eddie entering the theatre with Alison and Michael, sitting them a few rows back before coming to sit beside her. He grinned at her, raising an eyebrow and she smiled back as he turned to mouth something at Tom before turning to the stage as the show began.
"What was Matt worrying about?" Rachel murmured in his ear.
"I have no idea," he whispered back, finding himself inches from her face. She looked into his eyes as he pulled a strand of hair back from her face before his hand found its place on her shoulder. Rachel couldn't help but to relax into him, ignoring her worries about unprofessionalism as Matt and Steph appeared. She caught his eye when Steph began to act and both had to look away for fear of laughing. Then the doorbell mooed, and both clapped hands over their mouths in an attempt to stifle the uncontrollable laughter bubbling its way out of each of them.
"Ding dong!" said Karla, which just made things worse. Rachel's stomach ached and he could feel her physically shaking with hilarity as the sound effects continued to go wrong and Steph's dreadful acting got worse. Eddie shook his head at her as she was bent double, unable to stop herself, but the sight of the headmistress so hysterical was too much for him to take and he too found himself chuckling uncontrollably as the action on stage stopped. Rachel turned to beam at him but found her eyes stopping on a woman's face. It couldn't be, could it? No, she thought, Tess was long gone. Sean had taken her down with him and Rachel was so sure she'd never see her again. It couldn't be. She was being paranoid. That part of her life was over, encapsulated with Amanda and everything else that had gone with it in a corner of her mind she rarely unlocked while conscious. Tess Doyle couldn't be here, couldn't recognise her. She wasn't Amanda Fenshaw, she was Rachel Mason.
She tried to focus on the rest of the show, laughing at Tom's improvised jokes halfheartedly, but she couldn't get the woman off her mind. It may have been years but she couldn't really shake Amanda from her life. By the interval she had managed to work herself up into a panic and she found herself beckoning Eddie into the room of governors. She felt sick. Even as she spoke to the governors calmly and sipped at her coffee like Rachel Mason, the sophisticated adult, she could feel her stomach churning. And then she heard a familiar voice. "Congratulations everyone, the kids did you really proud."
It was Tess. It was definitely Tess. The nausea overcame her and she murmured "Excuse me." Before rushing out into the staff toilets where she promptly vomited, purging her stomach of everything she'd eaten, tears streaming down her face as she continued to retch. She couldn't breathe, she felt her head spinning, but she knew she had to get back. Flushing the toilet and splashing her face with water, she washed her mouth out and checked her reflection. She looked fine. She was used to acting like there was nothing wrong.
She took her place next to Eddie just as the show began. "You alright Rach?" he asked, his features concerned.
"Yeah, I'm fine Eddie, I realised I hadn't sent this email to a parent and I just knew I'd forget again if I didn't do it that very second," she lied convincingly, before dropping her voice to a whisper. "Sorry I left you alone with that lot," she murmured into his ear.
Once Eddie was distracted, she leaned forward to search for Tess. She was finally gone. "You alright?" she suddenly heard Eddie asking.
"Yeah, just…nervous."
"Rachel, I'll never be able to repay you for what you've done." He told her, "It isn't just seeing Michael again, I think me and Alison are really talking too."
"I'm glad," Rachel smiled as he put an arm around her again, making her feel calm.
By the time the show was over, she just wanted to get home and, after the good news about Roch-BEC and a quick chat with Eddie, she headed off.
Back at home, alone in the house built for a family where she lived all by herself, she crumbled. She slumped onto the floor and began to sob, he body shaking, her vision blurred by tears. Thinking back to Amanda she found herself repulsed again and ran to the toilet where she threw up yet again, her makeup smudged and her hair a tangled mess. She poured herself a glass of wine, then another, and another, until a whole bottle was gone. She drank until she couldn't feel a thing then she felt dizzy. She returned to the bathroom floor, for fear of vomiting, but she wasn't sick. She passed out, still crying although she couldn't feel the tears anymore, the pain was too much yet she was numb now. What a great start to her Christmas holiday.
A/N: Please review and let me know what you're thinking so I know whether to carry this on or leave it as there isn't much interest. Thanks for reading this far!