Well, it's that time again~ The chapters for this are slowly dwindling down to nothing and I'm trying to finish one of the two fanfics i've started -_-

You all are going to hate me

Kismet

Chapter Forty-Seven: It's the Only Way

Luckily, a medic from the camp was able to look at Lovino's condition. He told Antonio that naga venom usually killed it's victims rather quickly, within the hour, but since Lovino was not dead yet and his condition rather stable, there was a chance Lovino's body was fighting off the venom. The medic seemed completely shocked that it was even possible, but Antonio figured it had something to do the the healing elixir Lukas had made.

The man said that until Lovino awoke, he would still need nutrients, or he would die from dehydration or starvation. A few men and women were able to watch over Lovino while Antonio busied himself with the children (since Lovino would fly off the handle if anyone but himself or Antonio cared for them) and his work.

His 'nurses' cared for him well, giving him water and what food they could, by mashing it well and heavily mixing it with some water and hoping he didn't choke on it.

Antonio watched as the days passed by and turned into weeks. Lovino remained unresponsive to anyone and some believed he wasn't going to wake at all. The younger man was slowly losing weight, as if he wasn't already too thin to begin with. Antonio could never figure out how his husband could eat like a pig all day, but never gain weight.

Two months passed too quickly and Antonio sat in a chair, holding the twins close to him. They were silently playing with some stuffed toys of theirs and every once in a while made a sigh or giggle or talked a bit.

Antonio's eyes, however, were trained on the 'nurse' come to give Lovino water. She tilted his head back and slowly poured the water down his throat, careful about not doing it all wrong. When she finished, she left.

The king had occasionally given Lovino a small dose of the healing elixir, hoping to speed up the healing process if there was one even taking place. Lovino's condition may not have worsened, but it hadn't improved in the least at all, either.

People who worked with him daily could see the intense changes in the king. He no longer smiled, except one or two for his children, he spent more than his fair share of time locked away behind the thin walls of his tent. With fall setting in quickly, the northern parts of Sverran were getting colder. People were stocking up on food and needing Antonio's guidance more than ever, something he just wasn't giving anymore.

He looked away from Lovino. Seeing Lovino lying there, like he was dead … it had killed Antonio. Even he … even he figured Lovino wouldn't be waking up. He sighed and put the twins down for a nap. He stepped out of the tent. Just because his husband was 'dead', didn't mean he wasn't king. He frowned. The people of the country and the refugees still needed him. Mourning would have to wait … he had to move on.

People seemed to cower from him, sensing his offset mood and darker demeanor. The days carried on like they used to before his love fell ill. People would be directed by his words in preparation for winter, which was right around the corner. He finished and made his way back to the tent, knowing his babies would be getting up soon for their snack.

As expected, they were awake and waiting for him to hand them some cookies. They happily munched away on the snacks and he walked passed the bed, which he hadn't slept in since that first night of Lovino's coma.

He sat down in the chair that had become his bed and his favorite spot to just think and do his work. Antonio didn't even give a glance at Lovino as he went to work on some paperwork. He said nothing when the 'nurses' came by to 'feed' Lovino and that night he fed the babies, gave them a quick bath and put them to bed before delving back into his work.

This is how the schedule became. He no longer stared for hours at his 'dead' love, but rather, he became wrapped up in his work and children. Two more months passed and Antonio looked over the letter a final time.

He couldn't help but have a small smile. Antonio hadn't heard from Gilbert since they were children.

Without warning, the door flaps to his tent were thrown open, "Hello Toni!" the silver haired man shouted. The twins both darted their attention to the albino knight and stared.

Antonio rose from his chair and enveloped Gilbert in a spine crushing hug, "It's been too long, Gil!"

They laughed together for a moment, but Gilbert stopped, "Who the fuck is that?" he pointed to the bed. Antonio hadn't so much as looked at Lovino in the passed two months and when he finally allowed himself to look the still form, his heart ached.

"Th-that's my husband …" he whispered. Gilbert raised his brow and his eyes widened, "Oh, I see. Sorry I barged in here being so loud." he laughed.

Antonio shrugged, pushing back the old feelings of longing for his love back, "He won't wake up …"

"These yours, too?" Gilbert asked, kneeling by the twins' bed. They watched him closely, "Look just like you."

The king nodded, "Yeah, they're mine. How about we go for a walk, the twins should be going down for their nap soon anyway." he rubbed their heads and left the tent with Gilbert.

The two happily talked about what the other had been up to the passed several years since they'd last seen each other.

Gilbert talked about when his father dragged him from Sverran to Illonia and he took his brother back to Gartya where he'd trained to become a knight. When he'd earned his knighthood, he and his younger brother, Ludwig, whom was also a knight, began traveling around the north, getting stronger and just helping out.

"West went south into Illonia," Gilbert explained, "heard about the naga and dragons and West wanted to help out. He said he'll be meeting here within the next few weeks."

Antonio nodded, "He'll be careful, right? Naga are horrible creatures." he said bitterly.

Gilbert nodded, "West was injured heavily in a fight against one once. He lost every memory he had from before the accident. Well … almost all of them. He still has these bizarre dreams of a little girl in Illonia … one he's betrothed to or something like that." the Gartyarren shrugged it off, "So how's Franny?"

The Sverran king laughed lightly and told Gilbert about Francis becoming king as well, losing his wife and how he'd occasionally come to visit him and the camp with his daughter.

"Awesome." Gilbert looked at Antonio, "Isn't that word amazing? Awesome. Awesome. AWE-SOME!" the man laughed over his fun little word.

Antonio made his way back to the tent to feed the babies and get back to work. Gilbert said he was staying until his brother came through. Gilbert told him, he originally was headed to the castle, but stopped in the camp when he'd picked up a rumor the king was there instead. The albino knight and his brother were looking for work that was a little more permanent, possibly as guards or soldiers for Antonio. The king told him he'd see what he could do.

Night had fallen and the twins were fast asleep, but Antonio couldn't sleep. He'd allowed himself to fall and look at his comatose husband. Those images of Lovino's thin, pale body were now haunting him. Every time he closed his eyes, he was him and guilt wracked his body and mind. Tears began to flow but he angrily brushed them away. Work first, mourn later. He moved on. He moved on! He kept chanting to himself that he'd moved on.

Gilbert came along early the next morning, "Toni!" Antonio was jolted awake and looked up at the silver haired man, whom was staring at Lovino, "Why are you guys not in the same bed? Fighting?"

Antonio sighed, "What are you doing here so early in the morning?"

The knight laughed, "Came to visit you again. Morning kids!" he smiled at the waking babies. Antonio sighed, not really in the mood for his old friend's antics. He picked up Romana, whom was the first to start crying, "Hand me that bag over there, please." Antonio muttered, sleepily.

Gilbert raised his brow and grabbed the bag, "Isn't this your wife's job?"

Antonio winced and took the bag to feed her some milk. Now he knew what people meant when they said he was sometimes inconsiderate. He didn't answer Gilbert, only fed his daughter, then son. He slipped on his shoes, not caring that he was wearing the same things from the day before and grabbed up his babies, "Let's go get breakfast." he muttered, leading Gilbert from the tent.

Over their morning meal, Antonio focused his mind on his children and Gilbert whom was going on about some fight of his. Romana grabbed a grape from Antonio's plate and stuffed it into her cheeks. Her father smiled and kissed the top of her head.

"You know, you've changed, Toni …" Gilbert remarked, sipping the wine in front of him, making a face at the taste, "When we were younger, you were hyper all the time, kind of an airhead, no offense, and full of life … what happened?"

Antonio frowned, not really offended, but he hadn't realized he'd changed that much. He handed his son a grape, which the child happily munched on.

"I haven't changed … too much …" the king muttered to himself, mostly. Gilbert snorted, "Being king change you that much?"

He shrugged, letting Gilbert believe whatever he wanted. The rest of the morning was spent in awkward silence as Antonio fed the twins off of his plate. Gilbert said nothing more, knowing when to say something to his friend and when not to.

The four made their way back to the tent, where Antonio set the children in their bed and handed them some toys to play with.

"He's the laziest man I've ever met …" Gilbert remarked, staring at Lovino.

Antonio growled, "Just leave him alone, okay?"

Gilbert frowned, but said nothing as he looked away from Lovino to the now napping children. Antonio sighed, "I'm sorry, Gil … it's just … he was poisoned by a naga and hasn't woken up in four months …"

The knight looked at Antonio apologetically, "Pretty bad creatures …" he laughed bitterly. The two made their way into the camp to find a small group that was having trouble lately.

Antonio walked up to the men and women and began working out their problems over extra blankets for the upcoming winter.

After that problem was solved, he and Gilbert made their way around the camp, checking up on things here and there, "So yeah, did I tell you why West really went to Illonia? He's going to find his fiancee. One of the few things he remembers from our stay in Illonia. Personally, I doubt he'll find her. Too many people have died out there or moved elsewhere for him to get that lucky."

Antonio nodded, "Maybe she's here already?"

Gilbert nodded at that possibility and shrugged, "I don't know what she looks like, just what West told me. Light coppery auburn hair, golden honey eyes, West is head over heels with the girl he sees in his dreams. I feel for him for falling so hard." he laughed looking at Antonio, "That won't be me. Ever. I don't trust a woman at all, not since Elizaveta."

Antonio looked at Gilbert, "Elizaveta, huh? My husband knew a woman by that name …" Gilbert chuckled, "Let's just hope it wasn't the same one, huh? The one I knew was insane."

The king stopped by a happy family to make sure they were okay and he walked on. They stopped by the food storage to grab some lunch.

"Hey, Antonio, how did you and uh … your husband … even get together? I thought you'd have had to marry some girl or whatever …" Gilbert bit into his food, "This is pretty good …"

The king smiled lightly, remembering the moment he'd met Lovino, "Actually, I found him … when I went on a little adventure. I happened to be walking passed a river and a merman came to me, telling me his sister pulled a boy from the water.

"Lovino was taken back to my castle where he began working as my personal servant. We spent so much time together … and I eventually fell in love with him. Our relationship was kept secret for the longest time, but I eventually grew tired of that whole mess and proposed to him." tears began welling up, "He's a little grumpy, mean and rude, but he's only protecting his heart. He's actually so sweet and loving and a wonderful mother to my beautiful children. Lovino would do anything for me and I would for him …"

Gilbert sipped his drink, regretting his decision to ask now that tears were running down his old friend's cheeks. Antonio quickly wiped away the tears and put on a cold face, "But he's probably not going to wake up, seeing as he's already wasting away without proper nutrients. I'm going to be heading back to the capital in the next month or so. And honestly … I'm not sure …" his voice cracked, "I'm not sure I'm going to keep him on the brink of life and death when I do leave …"

The albino knight looked up at him shocked, "What … what are you saying?"

Antonio bit his lip, "I can't let him continue suffering like that. I'm only keeping him in that state because I'm being selfish. I love him too much to lose him, but this is only prolonging his death. He's wasting away, barely getting by from day to day! I'm going to … I'm going to have to kill him so that he's not suffering any more …"

"No … Toni, there has to be another way …"

"There isn't. He isn't getting better … he's not waking up, hell he won't move the slightest bit unless one of the nurses moves him. His breathing is shallow and he's not getting food … it's either I make it fast and end the suffering or let him die slowly. I don't know … maybe he's in terrible pain and I haven't done enough to help him …" he let out a choked sob, "I haven't even looked at him in two months … not until yesterday …" Antonio rose from his seat, "I need you to take the kids from the tent. Th-there's no w-way I can let th-them see it …"

Gilbert jumped up and grabbed his friend's arm, "I can't let you do it … I've never heard of someone surviving a naga bite and here one is, still breathing. What if his body is just taking time to heal? You can't kill him!" the albino stood by a code of honor to never take an undeserving life and watching his friend walking toward a still breathing man with the intent to 'end the suffering' was against his code, especially since Lovino didn't show any signs of being in pain. His condition, from the looks and sounds of it, are completely stable, even if they aren't getting better.

"I have to …" Gilbert saw the absolutely pain behind Antonio's eyes, despite the cold face. He watched the light slowly die in his friend and he let go of his arm. The Sverran king turned away and began walking again and Gilbert sighed. There was nothing he could do to change his mind.

TBC

~Lady Pyrien