Author's Note: Another chapter for my dear readers in less than 24 hours. Let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers or any such Marvel characters; it makes me sad on a daily basis.
It happened more normally this time. Clint wasn't away on a mission, and Rogers didn't frantically scream while simultaneously running in circles. Her contractions started to hit in the middle of dinner one night almost a month after Philip's third birthday. The conversation at the table was fairly normal, par for the course, with Rogers blushing about something or other and Banner and Stark bickering over who got to blow what up next. Pepper tried to corral the two science men with reminders of the city's limit on explosions in Avengers Tower. Philip talked animatedly to Thor about a field trip taken by his day care, and Clint flipped his attention between his son's story, the scientists' argument, and the captain's embarrassment.
"I'm tired of seeing your package every time you un-Hulk," Stark shouted. "Personally, my boat floats in the other ocean. We need to make you pants that stretch accordingly!"
"How does Hulk needing pants correspond to you blowing me up," Banner asked agitatedly. "You just want to play with your new toys and see how quickly the Other Guy can take over and smash you to bits."
"I don't want to be smashed to bits," Stark replied. "It's for your own well-being. We need to make sure the pants don't have any adverse reactions to common field situations."
"Adverse reactions? Stark, they're pants not flammable chemicals! People have been successfully making and wearing pants for centuries without spontaneously combusting! You're not blowing me up, goddamnit."
"Boys," Pepper chided. "Inside voices."
"My teacher says that to me a lot," Philip interjected. "A lot."
"That's because you've learned to speak at a certain volume so your egotistical uncles can hear you over the sounds of their own voices," Pepper informed him. Philip shrugged and went back to explaining how he made bubbles in Central Park with his friends on their field trip.
"So one creates bubbles with a soapy substance," Thor boomed. "Does one use a wand or a weapon to summon the bubbles?"
"You don't summon bubbles," Clint explained. "You blow them."
"Is this like what Tony was referring to the other day? When one performs the act of blowing on a male's pe..." Thor was interrupted when all the adults glared at him as Pepper practically screeched a silencing command. "Is that not an appropriate comment for young Philip to hear? On Asgard, our young are privy to all conversations whether it be in reference to battle or romantic union."
"I hate to interrupt this lesson on countering cultures, but I think I may need to make my way to a hospital," Natasha disrupted. Clint was by her side in three and a half seconds flat, taking her hand and easing her out of the chair.
"Hawkling Number Two is on the way," Stark gleefully shouted. With that the growing brood of superheroes made their way out of Avengers Tower.
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The hospital seemed to know of Natasha's arrival. Most of the young nurses scattered, leaving the halls oddly empty.
"This is what happens when you terrorize hospitals while pregnant," Banner pointed out with a smirk. "See that? See how no one wants to help the crazy pregnant assassin?"
"Don't think I'm too pregnant to maim you," Natasha countered. "I may not be able to see my thighs from up here, but I know they're still there and I know they're still deadly."
"Right this way, ma'am." A male nurse appeared with a wheelchair, which despite her pregnancy Natasha still eyed wearily. The man seemed to be trembling ever so slightly; it looked like he drew the short straw.
"Tasha, get in the wheelchair," Clint commanded gently. "In," he repeated pushing down on her shoulder lightly in a way that would have gotten anyone else severely injured.
"How old are you," Stark interrogated the nurse as they rolled through the hallways. "Where did you get your degree? How long have you been a nurse? Do you have a criminal record? What is your social security number? What day were you born?"
"Tony," Pepper attempted valiantly to keep him from harassing the nurse.
"He won't stop until he has certified background checks on everyone within a three mile radius," Banner interjected. "Last time, he may have caused more emotional trauma than Natasha."
"I resent that," Stark scoffed. "There's no way I can do more damage than her. She's terrifying on a normal day. Pregnant… the woman is like Satan's mistress."
"Mommy, what's a Satan's mistress?" Philip piped up from his spot in Roger's arms.
"Ignore everything Uncle Tony says," Rogers answered, ignoring the young boy's question.
"Again, I resent that," Stark feigned hurt. "No, this cannot be their room. We need a room with a window. Yes, looking at me like I'm crazy isn't going to help. We're still going to need a room with a window. Go find your little computer and relocate us."
"Please," Pepper added for her boyfriend, giving the nurse an apologetic smile.
"Like I said, Stark is responsible for more emotional trauma than Natasha. Check mate. You lose," Banner smirked mockingly.
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Everyone was in the waiting room sans Natasha and Clint, who were finally settled in a room with a window. Tony watched the interaction between his nephew and his girlfriend, and he couldn't help but smile.
"Can you find Waldo, sweetie," Pepper asked Philip, who rested comfortably in her lap with the book across his knees.
"I found the girl that looks like Waldo. See," he pointed out the girl behind the water tower.
"You're right! I didn't see that one. What else do you see?" She ran her fingers through his shaggy hair, resting her chin on his small shoulder.
"There's an elephant. Those don't belong in pools," he laughed as he pointed to the large animal in the drawing. "Unless you're at the circus," Philip amended. "Daddy was in a circus. He said they had a seal too. It clapped and played with a ball. I think a seal would be cool. We should get a pet for the tower."
"I think that's a great idea. What other animals would make good pets? I think we should get a dinosaur."
"We can't get a dinosaur, Auntie Pepper. They're all dead."
"You're too smart for me, kiddo." She tickled him. He laughed and laughed, squirming in her lap. The book dropped to the floor.
"Auntie Pepper. Auntie Pepper," he squealed. "Stoooop," he heaved through his giggles. "It tickles!"
"That's the point, silly goose." Finally, she slowed her actions and the young boy fell against her chest, breathing heavily.
"That was funny. Can we read a story?" When Pepper nodded, he jumped out of her lap to find his backpack. "Oh! I got a ring pop from my teacher. Can I have?" The woman glanced down at her watch, seeing it was well past his bedtime, but she shrugged and nodded. He came bounding back with his book of fairy tales and his ring pop before snuggling into her lap. "I like this one," he declared after flipping through pages of colorful illustrations. "It has a dragon."
"This one it is then," Pepper declared. She opened the package and slipped the lollipop ring on his finger before starting the story. She read in voices fitting to the characters, grumbling when a goblin spoke or pitching her voice high when it was the princess. Philip was hooked, his fingers brushing over the illustrations as she read.
"Marry me."
Pepper almost didn't hear it. Banner, Thor, and Rogers looked at Stark wide-eyed.
"What?"
"Marry me, Pepper. I don't have a ring. I don't really have a plan for this," the billionaire started rambling through words. "But I want this with you. Whatever this is, however it turns out to be, I want it with you. I want all of it with you."
"I have a ring," Philip announced, offering his uncle his Ring Pop. "Here," the little boy announced. He slid off Pepper's lap and handed the lollipop to Tony. "You can have my ring."
Stark grinned widely at his nephew. "Thanks, kid." He ruffled the shaggy sandy blonde hair as he rose from his seat and moved over to Pepper. Kneeling on the speckled linoleum floor of the waiting room, he took her hand. "Pepper Potts, will you marry me?" He presented the Ring Pop sincerely. He looked up at her anxiously. The three other men looked at her too, all smiling happily. Philip was clapping as Banner pulled the young boy into his lap.
"Yes, yes of course," she answered, capturing Tony's face in her hands and kissing him deeply. He slid the slightly sticky Ring Pop onto her finger.
"It's just like in my story, Uncle Bruce! And they live happily ever after," he repeated.
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"We need a name, Clint. We can't call her Baby Girl Barton for the rest of her life," Natasha declared as she cradled the small child in her arms.
"We need a name before Stark comes in here and starts calling her Antonia."
"That name has been on the veto list from Day One."
"Our veto list is crazy long, Tasha." He paused for a second. "What about Barkley?"
"We're naming a child not a dog, Clint. Also, Barkley Barton, really?"
"Yeah," he grimaced. "Yeah, that wouldn't work out too well. Rebecca?"
"Becky Barton."
"Fuck," he grumbled. "Why do I keep doing that? I must have a secret obsession with alliterations."
"Ella or Ellie?"
"Olivia?"
"Ava?"
"Grace?"
"Harper?"
"Talia?"
"As in Natalia? Next," Natasha vetoed.
"Persimmon?"
"Are you on drugs? These are children, Philip and Persimmon Barton. Clint, seriously?"
"The fruit tastes really good," Clint defended.
"What name do you like," Natasha asked the little girl in her arms somewhat desperately.
"What about Amelia Jane?"
"I like it. What do you think, love? Do you like it? Is Amelia Jane your new name?" The baby fixed her eyes on Natasha's and licked her lips.
"Looks like it is Amelia Jane Barton, missy. We have a name," Clint whooped happily. "She's beautiful, Tasha. Miss Amelia, you are absolutely perfect," he cooed as he leaned onto the hospital bed to look at the baby in his wife's arms. "You ready to see the family?"
"Philip first, then the rest of the crazy brood," Natasha agreed. "You ready to meet your big brother?" She paused for a second, looking up at Clint with a wide smile.
"What is it, Tash?"
"I never thought in my life I would say those words. Wow," she murmured completely in awe of how everything turned out.
"But you're happy, right?"
"Yeah, I am. I love you, you know?" He nodded and smiled sincerely at her comment before nearly skipping down the corridor to find the three year old.
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"How is she?" Pepper asked excitedly, the Ring Pop still on her finger.
"She's good. They're both good. Why are you wearing a lollipop?"
"I'm engaged."
"The billionaire asked you to marry him with a piece of candy," he asked, completely baffled. "Seriously?"
"Technically it wasn't even his candy. It was Philip's," Pepper responded with a laugh.
"I am sitting right here," Stark groaned.
"My son shares candy," Clint questioned disbelieving with a laugh. "I can't get him to share his macaroni and cheese, but Stark can get him to share candy. Unbelievable."
"Do we get to meet the baby soon," Rogers asked quietly.
"Yeah, I was going to take Philip in to meet her first, and then you are welcome to pile in." The archer went over and crouched down next to the chairs that were shoved together to create a makeshift bed for the small child. "Hey buddy," he spoke softly, ruffling his son's hair.
"Daddy," Philip mumbled, burying his face in his blanket.
"You want to go see Mommy and meet your baby sister?"
"Sleep," he muttered.
"Definitely Romanov's kid with that one," Stark laughed.
"Come on, kiddo," Clint encouraged. "I know Mommy really wants to see you."
"Mommy."
"Yeah, Mommy," he confirmed. "Come on." He scooped Philip into his arms and walked back towards the hospital room. "We're going to go meet your baby sister."
"And see Mommy." Philip emphasized what he thought was the most important factor to being woken up so early in the morning. When they walked through the door, Clint placed the young boy on the edge of the hospital bed. "Mommy," he greeted sleepily.
"Hey, love. Come here. I want you to meet someone." She ushered him over with her free hand. He crawled carefully over the bed and snuggled into her side, opposite the bundle of blankets. She tilted Amelia towards Philip, so the little boy could see the baby's face. "This is your baby sister, Philip. Her name is Amelia Jane. Can you say hi?"
"Hi, baby. That's Mommy and that's Daddy. They're mine, but I guess I can share. Mommy, I shared my ring with Uncle Tony and he gave it to Auntie Pepper," he told her excitedly. She smiled fondly at him, kissing his forehead, before shooting a questioning look at Clint.
"Engaged," he responded with a smirk. "With our son's Ring Pop." Natasha laughed happily. "Smile," Clint requested as he took a picture with his phone. "I'll go get the rest of the crazy crew."
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Amelia was a year old when Pepper and Tony finally got married. The ceremony was on the white sand beach of an island Natasha didn't even think was on a map. Philip walked the rings down the aisle in a black suit, bowtie, and converses. It was a quiet- no ringing phone about Stark Industry, no Doom-bots, no explosions, and especially no Fury. It was perfect.
Stark donned his Iron Man suit and swirled Pepper into the air over the ocean as their first dance before darting off to another unknown island for their honeymoon.
Philip and Clint, both still in their suits, kicked off their shoes and ran into the waves. Natasha lounged on the ground, Amelia within arms reach playing in the sand. Thor stripped to his boxers and waded into the water as well. Banner and Rogers ran back to their rooms to get swim trunks.
"Throw me, Daddy!" Philip squealed as he tried to avoid one of the waves. Clint launched his son off his shoulders over and over again.
"Alright, I need a breather, kiddo. Ask Uncle Steve or Thor to throw you if you still want to do that. I'm going to go collapse on the sand," Clint shuffled through the waves back to Natasha, where he promptly fell to the ground. Amelia crawled her way over to him and squished his face in her small hands. "Hey sweetie. Are you having fun?" He paused to look up at her. She took a fistful of sand and put it on his forehead. "Yes, thank you. I love the sand."
"I hear it's a good exfoliating element," Natasha laughed.
"Great, our one year old is already beauty product conscious."
"If you insist on playing catch with my son," Natasha bellowed. "You had better be damn sure he doesn't fall." Clint propped himself up to see Philip flailing happily in the air between Rogers and Thor. "I really will maim you."
"Natasha, I think the whole world knows that you have no fear in injuring the person that dares touch either of your children," Banner teased as he flopped in the sand.
"It doesn't hurt to remind them," she countered with a smirk. "Hey there, little one," Natasha greeted as Amelia crawled over to her. She lifted her daughter in the air above her head, tossing her carefully and smiling as the baby giggled. Amelia tucked her head into Natasha's chest and curled into her mother. "I think it's getting close to your bedtime," she whispered to the young child.
"I'll take her," Clint offered. As he stood, his water-logged suit dripped onto the sand around him. "Come on, sweetie. Let's go night-night. Night, Bruce. See you in the room, Tash."
Around them the sun was setting, casting a pinkish tint over the horizon. Philip clung tightly to Roger's neck as they played a seemingly endless game of tag with Thor, who occasionally kicked water back at them as they ran along the shore.
When the last slivers of the sun were nearly hidden by the blanketing darkness of night, the three guys stumbled back to the sand tiredly. "You wore me out, son," Captain declared as he carefully lowered the boy to the sand. Philip promptly fell onto Natasha, his small body covering her with his head resting on her shoulder.
"I'm tired, Mommy."
"I bet, bud." She ignored the water from his clothing that seeped through her own dress. She placed a soothing hand on his back, drawing her hand in wide circles as she had done to lull him to sleep since he was a baby. "Did you have fun playing in the water?" He rubbed one of his eyes with the back of his palm as he nodded. "You ready to go back to the room?" He nodded again. "What do you say to your uncles?"
"Вы для играть с мной."
"In English, мой сынок?" Natasha prompted, whispering into his ear.
"Thank you for playing with me," he translated his previous statement.
The three men left on the beach wished the mother and son sweet dreams as Natasha pulled herself off the ground, holding Philip against her chest. His arms looped around her neck instinctively as he rested his head at the juncture of her neck and shoulder.
"Мама может мы прочитала рассказ?" Philip mumbled into her neck.
"Yes, love, we can read a story." She kissed his forehead. She laughed quietly, betting anything that the little boy would be dead asleep by the time they got back to the room. "Я тебя люблю." Natasha told Philip she loved him as she rocked him gently.
When she got the door to the room open, she smiled at the sight of Clint fast asleep on the couch with Amelia resting in the crook of his arm. Natasha quietly and efficiently undressed Philip, throwing his wet suit into the bathroom behind her. She dried him off gently before putting him in his pajamas. She tucked him in to the rollaway bed in the corner. Pulling the blankets up around his little boy, she kissed his forehead, whispering again how much she loved him.
Then she untangled Amelia from Clint's arms, cradling her as she walked over to the crib. Natasha kissed her daughter on the cheek, sang a soft Russian lullaby out of habit, and again whispered her love to the small child before laying Amelia in the crib. Padding softly into the bedroom, she changed out of her damp, sandy dress and into pajamas before going over to Clint's prone body.
"Hey, Clint," she spoke softly, caressing his face and feeling the slight stubble rough against her palm. "Let's go to bed."
"Tasha," he mumbled sleepily.
"They say Philip gets his inability to wake up from me, but little did they know he's all you."
"Not true," he countered, his eyes still closed. "He smirks just like you. He makes all your same facial expressions, especially the look he gives me when he thinks I'm being an idiot. He's got a lot of you. He just has my boyish charm and good looks."
"We're not talking about your charm and looks again," Natasha laughed. "Come on, carnie. Bed." She tugged his arm, pulling him into a seated position.
"I was so comfy," he complained as he shuffled behind her.
"We're not going to teach our children that it's normal to sleep on couches. They've got enough crazy to counteract. We're going to make the little things as normal as possible, which means you, sir, are going to sleep in a bed. Philip already calls our bed a nest. He's convinced your perches are actually nests. He asked me the other day, if you sit with a bunch of sticks in trees like the birds in the park."
"Smart kid. Night, Tasha. Love you," he mumbled into the pillow as he fell haphazardly on the bed. She shook her head humorously, before sliding under the covers.
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Like Natasha, Philip moved through the tower almost silently. His footsteps didn't seem to make a sound unless he wanted them to. Even when he ran through the halls, which was frequently, his feet seemed to hit the ground noiselessly. That was how he ended up in Tony's lab. The AI was focused on the calculations for the experiment Stark and Banner were performing.
The two were designing a more efficient system for some of Iron Man's one-time usage clip-on attachments. Lasers and flammable objects scattered through the lab. Stark shot different versions of projectiles at a target painted on the far wall.
They were entirely focused on the experiments at hand, completely ignorant to anything besides the effect of each projectile against the target including the four year old watching quietly from just inside the door way.
"Whatcha doin'?" His little voice startled the two men, Banner jumped as Tony fumbled with his remote.
"Fuck! Get down," Stark shouted as he realized what button he depressed when he manhandled the remote.
The force of the explosion shook the tower. Tony ended up on the opposite side of the lab, his head knocked painfully against one of the cabinets containing a retired Iron Man suit. Dazed, he rubbed the back of his head and took in the clouds of dust and dry wall filling the lab.
"Tony!" Pepper's voice could be heard chastising him through the PA system. "We just fixed the lab from the last combustion!"
"Hi Hulk," Philip waved happily as the large green beast unwrapped himself from the young boy.
"You Hulk-ed out in my lab," Tony shrieked. Hulk growled.
"Was that Philip's voice," Pepper screeched. "You blew up the lab with your nephew in it. Are you out of your mind, Anthony Stark?"
Within moments, Natasha and Pepper were standing in the midst of the wreckage. Hulk shuffled through the debris and offered his open palms to the assassin. Philip sat happily, completely unharmed, in the giant's hands.
"Hi Mommy." He reached out his arms, and she pulled him onto her hip.
"What do you say to Hulk?"
"Thank you for not letting me explode."
"Did you sneak up on the boys while they were in the lab," she asked. He nodded guiltily. "What have we said about that?"
"That I'm not supposed to do it because people get jumpy and bad things happen," Philip sighed. "I just wanted to say hi, Mommy."
"I know, love, but you've got to be careful, okay? Can you apologize to Uncle Tony and Uncle Bruce?" Natasha put him on the ground and turned him to face the scientists, one still rubbing his head and the other having changed back to human form.
"I'm sorry I broke your lab." He offered each of his uncles a hug before returning solemnly to Natasha's side.
"It's okay, little man. I would have blown it up eventually on my own," Stark comforted.
"Isn't that the truth," Pepper grumbled. "I'll call the clean-up crew and the construction company."
"Come on, love. Let's get out of the way, so they can work on fixing the lab." Natasha hefted him onto her hip again, offered an apologetic smile, before returning to their suite where Amelia was still napping away.