Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or anything to do with it, however the OC's are all my own. The concept of Jasper being the 'God of War' is something that I've read in a few fics, but I don't know where it originates, so I'm sorry for not giving credit where credit's due! Plus, I have no idea what Louisiana, or Wisconsin are like - I'm from England, so please, forgive any mistakes. Have a great day, and I love you guys!
Jasper POV
November 2020
Madison, Wisconsin
It took me a couple of hours before I was calm enough to return from Houston, arriving back at the Cullen house at three minutes past six in the evening, and once I stepped over the threshold, I knew all Hell was about to break loose.
Cam had been here. Her scent was still potent in the air; the poignant smell of leather and sex had had my groin tightening, and I had to relieve some of the pressure that built up in my jeans by adjusting the crotch area. She wasn't now, she hadn't been for a few hours, maybe two or three by the intensity of her residual scent in the air, otherwise I would have had her in my arms already, pressin' feverish kisses to her temple, her lips, her chest, her breasts.. Alright, let's jus' stop right there. It would do no good if I pitched a tent. I didn't need any more awkwardness - there was already enough to choke me.
But something had happened here. I could smell it in the air. Ali was pissed, and that little pint-sized pixie never lost her cool. Her anger was pulsating from her bedroom, the sound of foreign, loud, angry music pounding from her room. Honestly, Ali didn't even listen to music, and when she did, she would never have chosen to listen to the angry rap music that was pounding from her bedroom. I could hear her throwing something; a ball, possibly,
If that didn't raise eyebrows, then Rose surely did.
Rose was almost constantly irritated, that was common knowledge, but it was non-threatening, like mild annoyance. She was just upset about somethin' or other, but this was different. It was almost like she wanted to kill somethin'.. Or someone, I guess, an' that worried me to no end. Rose was the calm one in the family - she didn't like gettin' her hands dirty. She very nearly always had Emmett do it for her - he was glad to, of course, but still, it was kind of magical, the amount of control that she wielded over him.
"Where's the fire, sugar?," I asked, as soon as I walked into the conservatory, where Rose was silently stewing, her hands clenched tightly together and a frown marring her features. I wondered if her and Em were going through some problems, like they had when Bella first came 'round, but.. No, she was still just as in love wit' that big lug as she always was. My ability told me that already; she was feeling ample amounts of anger, hated, quiet aggression, but still love.
"Your... friend," she spat, angrily, her eyes flashing up towards my own, the cleft between her brows deepening as she took me in, "She's overstepping her boundaries."
My brows furrowed in confusion, and I felt a sliver of panic settle in my chest. Was she talking about Camilla? I thought they were friends.. What changed? I pursed my lips, silently, and asked, sitting down beside her, as close as I could without actually touching her, "What do you mean, sugar?"
She growled, lightly, as if she were annoyed that it was taking me so long to connect the dots, and flipped her hair over her shoulder
She threw her dainty hands up in the air, and she huffed, clearly annoyed. She pouted, and crossed her arms over her chest, minutely. "I'm talking about Irina, Jazz. She's being so fucking stupid! We told you that she's bad news! We told you this wasn't going to end well, but do you listen to us? No!"
"What happened while I was gone, Rosie?," I asked, wit' a worried expression painting itself onto my face.
Her lips thinned, and she glared at the space in front of her. Her lips parted, as though she were trying to find the easiest way to tell me, and then settled on just throwing it out there. She said, her eyes settling on my still form, bluntly, "She tried to attack Camilla!"
That was it.
My entire body clenched, and I had to force myself to stay rooted on the spot. I bit out, angrily, "Explain."
There was no blood in the air, so Cam hadn't been hurt, but the thought of her here, frightened, in the eyes of a hurt, jealous, spurned lover had me feeling mighty angry, but more than anything, I was worried. Rose froze, fractionally, her eyes wide with fear, however I brushed it off. My fingers twitched at my side, and she glanced down, catching the movement. I was sure she thought I was going to hit her - God, the thought never crossed my mind, I would never, could never hurt Rose, not like that - and I placed a hand on her knee, and pleased, softly, "Tell me, Rosie."
I hoped that Rose knew that I wouldn't ever lay a hand on her, but she still had enough fear of me, or the other parts of me, and what they could do, to respect my wishes, and follow my orders. No matter how much she may trust me, I made her feel nervous. Rightfully so, honestly.
Rose squared her shoulders, but she wasn't quite as confident in herself as I was used to, and she said, softly, "S-She.. Well, Cam came over earlier - Ali wanted to spend some girl time together or some shit, and we did. It was fun, the guys were out back, playing in the snow, we were upstairs, gossiping, and.. Then she came in. It got awkward, obviously, but Irina just wouldn't quit with the low-blows. Little comments that I could see were driving Cammy nuts - and then.. I don't know what happened, but one minute everyone is sitting down, the next Irina and Cam are toe-to-toe, slinging insults back-and-forth."
She breathed out a quiet smile, and continued, "It didn't get so far that Irina actually hurt Cam.. Jesus, we wouldn't have let her. But, you've got to know," her voice lowered to a gentle, dangerous whisper, as if she were telling her most prized secret, "If she got the chance she would have. Jazz.. You've fucked her up.. You've got to see that, right? You, better than the rest of us, know how she's feeling, all of the time, and you still went there with her."
During her verbal asswhooping, I blanched, feeling the guilt that always swarmed me whenever I thought about Irina and her feelings for me swelled in my gut, an' I couldn't look at her in her molten topaz eyes. I sighed, my hands running through my hair, and said, tentatively, "I ain't mean to hurt her - I didn't, I swear. I.. Bein' around all you guys, every day, all the love in the air, an' it gets to me. Try being a single vampire, wit' no rules, and nobody for you to come home to, and we'll see if you don't.. you know.. Fuck around."
She scoffed, and I jumped to defend myself and my actions, quickly, "I know I'm shitty. Hell, I'm the one dealing wit' it, but.. I'm serious about this girl. Camilla.. She's.. I don't know, there's just something about her, I guess."
Rose chuckled, an' reached over, to pinch my cheeks, in that condescending way only older sisters were allowed to - even though I was both physically and literally nearly twice her age. She cooed, ignoring my shudder at the sensation of unfamiliar hands touching my skin, "Who are you, and what have you done with my little brother?"
"Listen, you wench," I joked, grabbing her hands in my own, our familiar vampiric chill being shared, and I stared at her, seriously, "I wont do any harm to that girl. I know.. You're a little protective of her, ain't you, sugar?"
She shrugged and glanced away but I could see that she was smiling a little to herself. She replied, earnestly, "It doesn't matter if we like her, Jazz.. You need to be prepared to tell her about you.. All of you. Us, included. So be sure about her, that you can trust her to be there, before you throw us all in at the deep end."
The thought of sharing any part of my blood-soaked, sullied, dirty life wit' such a pure, beautiful, innocent being made my stomach churn in revulsion. No, I couldn't tell her. I wanted her to be proud of me, not be frightened. Because, let's be honest, who would stick around after that? She would run for the nearest stack of hills as soon as I told her about my past, and that thought made me feel as though I had nothing to live for.
I placed my hands, firmly, on my knees, and assured, "Rose, I'm gonna go talk to Irina.. I need to sort this out."
She gave me a proud smile, and pointed upwards, before stating, sardonically, "Good luck, brother."
Shit.
-0-
Of course she was sitting in the middle of my bed. This just got a whole Hell of a lot more awkward.
"Hey," she grinned, lovingly, "How have you been?"
I cringed at the.. Compassion, the attraction, the obsession that pulsated from her being, and I felt my frown deepen in response. I shuffled closer to her, edging around my own bed, and ended up settling in the chair tucked under my desk, and stated, "Irina.. We need to talk."
She smiled, wider now, and shuffled up the bed, settling on the pillows, her hair tousled, her attire - one of my dress shirts, unbuttoned and baring everything to me and the rest of the world. Her legs were just as long as they usually were, but I didn't feel the urge to touch her smooth skin as I would usually. Her face, just as beautiful, but.. I just didn't care. It didn't do anything for me anymore. My heart belonged to a pretty little human, and it was pathetic. Idly, I wondered what the Jasper of the early 1900s would say, looking at me now.
"That Jasper would tell you that you're a giant pansy and probably kick you in the nuts," the voice in the back of my head drawled.
"What do you want to talk about, Cowboy?," she drawled, in what I suppose would have been a sensual intonation, had I not wished for a lighter, daintier voice to speak to me in such a way.
"I think.." I started, clasping my hands together, a little uncomfortable for some reason, before continuing on," I think we should talk about us, Irina."
"Oh, I'm so glad you're finally thinking about it, Jazz," she crooned, "I thought I was coming off a little too strong, but.." she crawled forwards, her eyes glassy wit' some emotion that I couldn't understand, "I'm glad that you've gotten over your human fetish."
Shooting up, angrily, I growled, "It is not a fetish, Irina, an' I do not appreciate it bein' labelled as such. She is.. She's my mate. As much as it may pain you to realise it, I will not now, nor will I ever be wit' you in such a way. I jus'.. I cant do it anymore."
Her eyes, throughout my statement, widened, an' even became a little teary at some points, and I felt as though I were the world's biggest asshole, but it was a necessary hurt. I needed to get this out - she needed to hear this.
She was grasping at straws now, and faltered, miserably, "But.. W-Why?"
I sighed, deeply, and replied, "Irina.. It's nothin' to do wit' you, it's not 'cause of anythin' you did, sugar. You're jus' not.. What I need."
It wasn't a 'want' anymore. It was a necessarily for me to have her, and I didn't know how I was going to survive without her.
"I-I.. What did I do wrong?," she stammered, her lower lip trembling with anxiety and distress. I sighed, deeper this time, drawing my hands through my hair for the hundredth time, and stated, "Nothin', sugar. I'm jus' not good for you."
"You're perfect for me, Jazz," she appeared in front of me, her hands holding my own, and I winced, however, out of respect for her, I didn't recoil in disgust.
"C'mon, Jasper," she sighed, hopeful, still, "Don't give up on us."
Glancing away from her, I removed my hands from hers, then stood, and pushed her away, lightly, drawing my shirt to cover her up, at least a little, and stated, "Irina. We're over. Done. Completely. Please.. If you wanna stay here, that's fine, but its not for me. I wont seek you out again.. It's not fair of me to do that to you," I kissed her hairline, softly, pushing ample amounts of self-worth and confidence onto her, and finished, quietly, "I'm sorry."
It took her all of 0.6 seconds to collapse in on herself, and start dry-sobbing to all Hell. That wasn't my problem - I was already nearly out of the house, passing a smug-looking Rose, who simply flicked the channels on the flat screen TV over with a self-satisfied grin on her face. She was vindictive when she wanted to be, an' I usually loved it. Right now, though, I knew where I needed to go. I needed to see her, an' make sure she was okay. I wanted to see her beautiful face, and kiss her pretty pink lips, an' hold her tight to my body an' promise to never let her go. It was nearly 8 in the evening, an' humans never usually slept so early - especially teenage girls, they were all about the instant messaging and the gossip, so she should really be awake right now, however I couldn't put it past her to surprise me and be snoozing the hours away.
Just the thought of her bright grey eyes, shining up at me, wit' nothing but happiness, her warm hands clenching my shirt so tightly, her expression so focused an' adorable, it almost made my head hurt. She shocked me, daily, wit' her sudden mood swings, an' the way she saw the world, in such an intelligent, forthcoming yet level-headed, loving way made me hopeful that there is a possibility that we could actually make it. The thought of her coming to harm - especially at my hand, or the hands of someone of my kind - made me feel a flash of violence and malevolent wrath rush through my being, an' the sound of her steady heartbeat being the only thing to quell my anxiousness.
Just as I was ready to break down, I burst through the brush surrounding the back of her house, and I found myself slowly walking through her garden, at a snail's pace, glancing' up at her window, with a wondering, warm smile on my face.
"J..Jasper.."
And she was dreaming of me?
Surely this beautiful creature was trying to kill me, as in that moment, the sound of my name, in that tone, falling from her petal-soft, luscious lips, made all of the proverbial blood rush from the abject parts of my body, all the way to my cock, filling it, an' set an aching in my body, an' I craned my neck backwards, releasing' a deep sigh that vibrated from a deep sector of my chest.
"I need you.. So badly," I groaned into the quiet of the garden, hoping that she may hear me. The only response I received was a twitching of my cock, and a rustling of the surrounding trees.
I needed to see her face - maybe then I'd be able to relax a little.
-o-o-
Read, review and I hope you enjoyed it! Thank you, and I'm sorry for being such a butthole with the uploading. Tsh, anyway. Have a great day!