A/N: To my Tomorrow Is Another Day reader - I'm working on the update. I just needed a Monday morning pick me up and you all make me very, very happy with your reaction to this story.

Welcome new readers! Many thanks to Bookishqua for the rec.

For the first time in Edward's life, his mother was waiting when he got home. Actually, she happened to be at her car when he pulled up.

"Ah, Edward," she greeted him, hugging him. She stepped back then, crossing her arms. "I'm glad I caught you before you got in the door."

Edward tilted his head, looking at his mother carefully. "Am I in trouble?" he asked, reading the expression on her face with perplexed amusement. It was, for them, a novel situation.

Her answering smile was somewhat sardonic. "I know it's not my place to meddle," she began.

"But?"

She sighed. "I suppose I'm just wondering why you weren't there today," she said gently.

"Well, I..." Edward started, thrown by the question. "I... I guess, I didn't think about it." He rubbed the back of his neck self-consciously.

Esme pursed her lips, taking a moment before she spoke. "Pregnancy is an extremely trying, emotional time for any woman, but Bella is so young. She seems very frightened. She doesn't seem at all happy about being pregnant."

Edward looked down, feeling instantly ashamed. "This wasn't planned. I just thought she might be uncomfortable having me there."

"You're her husband. We heard the baby's heartbeat today, got his first picture. Any pregnant woman would want to share that moment but not with her mother-in-law."

"I'm sorry," Edward said, ducking his head.

She patted his arm. "I didn't bring it up to chastise you, sweetheart. I know you're just as new to this as she is." When she saw the look on his face, she frowned. "Really, I wasn't trying to make you feel guilty. Your relationship is relatively new, and marriage isn't easy. You'll get better at communicating but only if you work at it."

"You're right," he answered lightly. "I didn't mean to be so inattentive. I know she's scared. I should have thought to go with her." He grimaced. "A good husband, a good father would have known that."

"Oh, sweetheart," his mother sighed. "Don't do that to yourself."

Quickly, Edward shook his head, putting on a smile for his mother. "I was thinking out loud, that's all. Will you stay? We can go out for dinner - the three of us. Or we can pick up Dad, too."

Esme's cheek twitched, and she smiled. "Bella already invited me for dinner, except we're not going out."

"Oh, no?"

They'd gotten to his door at that point, and as he opened it, he stumbled backward, overwhelmed.

His mother laughed lightly at him. "I need to track back to my car. I was out here for a reason, after all. I'll meet you inside in a few minutes."

Edward nodded absently, more consumed with the odor that permeated the air.

It was something of a novelty to walk in the door of his home and have the aroma of dinner cooking hit him like a brick wall.

A mouthwatering, delicious brick wall.

Following his nose, he had to pause outside the kitchen, wiping his hand across his mouth to ensure he wasn't drooling.

Edward peered around the corner, resting his head against the wall, content to watch unobserved for a moment.

It wasn't that he was trying to be creepy; he'd just never really had the chance to see Bella this … natural. She always carried herself with her shoulders slightly hunched, her eyes looking warily out from under long eyelashes as if she expected to be scolded. Given the circumstances, Edward understood that she had every reason to be paranoid, awaiting rebuff. He'd wondered, though, what she was like when she was at ease.

There was a serene sort of smile on her face as she moved about the kitchen, chopping this and stirring that. It made him happy. Despite her desire to pay him back in whatever way possible, he'd wondered if she resented being asked to cook. Just because she could, didn't mean she'd want to.

She was very pretty. It wasn't that he hadn't noticed before; there'd just been other, more important things to think about. It felt wrong to look at her the way a man might look at a woman, taking in all her features. Just because he was helping her didn't give him the right to ogle. In fact, it was the very last thing she needed: another man looking at her like that.

But he couldn't help that his eyes were open. He couldn't help but admire the quiet beauty of her face: her flawless skin, full lips, and dark eyes full of secret thoughts. She'd piled her hair on her head, exposing a neck that cried to be kissed and Edward had the oddest sensation - a craving to splay his hand over the expanse of skin where her back disappeared into the tank top shirt she wore.

Again, Edward felt a pang, a simple twist of his heart.

It wasn't such a bad fantasy, imagining this was really his. He wasn't so old-fashioned that all he desired in a wife was a clean house and a meal on the table, but it was nice to come home to someone. Not just anyone, but this woman - this kind, courageous, intriguing woman. There was still so much she held trapped inside of her, so many puzzles, and he wanted the time to unwind them all.

The front door opening again reminded Edward he was being rude - staring as he was. He cleared his throat, smiling gently as Bella turned. She looked a little shocked, but her answering smile seemed genuine, if a bit shy, when she greeted him.

"Bella... what is that smell?"

She seemed a little uneasy, glancing up at him with uncertainty. "Um. It's nothing special. It's just chicken enchiladas and Mexican rice. Is that okay?" She grimaced. "It was probably a bad idea to make it without asking you first."

"No, it really does smell delicious," he hurried to assure her. "And it's fine. I'm not picky."

At that, she actually snorted, though she quickly covered her mouth, looking at him apologetically. Behind him, Esme was also chuckling.

"What?" he asked, raising an amused eyebrow as he looked between his mother and his wife. "I'm not."

Esme full on started chortling.

Her lips quirking upward, Bella's expression was lighter than he could ever recall seeing. "Yes you are. You're finicky."

She was teasing him, but she wasn't.

"Who told you I was finicky? Mom? Are you spreading nasty rumors?"

"Don't look at me," Esme said merrily, holding her hands up.

"No one had to tell me. I have eyes and ears," Bella replied, feigning indignation. "Come on, Edward. Have you heard yourself order food? You ask about every little detail and change things around."

"Maybe I'm a little particular about how I want my food prepared..."

"Yes. That is the definition of the word finicky," she concluded, stabbing a fork in the air in his direction for additional emphasis.

He chuckled. "I suppose you're right. But, that being said, your dinner smells delicious. I'm enjoying just the smell, so I imagine the taste will be just as good if not better. "

She looked down, but he was glad to find she looked pleased at his compliment.

"Bella?" Esme began as they sat down a few minutes later. "Did you show Edward the ultrasound?"

"Oh, no," Bella answered, ducking her head. Her eyes flitted up to his, and Edward gave her a small smile of encouragement.

Dutifully, she stood and retrieved her bag. Instantly, Edward could see what his mother was talking about. There was something distinctly pained about her expression - as if she was waiting for his lip to curl in disgust or something to that effect. None of the happiness that usually pervaded the air when there was talk of babies and pregnancy was present, nor was Bella glowing with joy the way people spoke about.

But there was, he thought, the slightest bit of hope in the way she placed the image in his outstretched hand, biting her lip as she did. It reminded him of a child presenting her parent with a random treasure she'd found, unsure if she would be met with approval.

Carefully, keeping his eyes on hers so she wouldn't be startled by his movement, he wrapped an arm loosely around her waist, tugging her gently to his side. He glanced at the image and then up at her with a lopsided grin. "Looks like you get bad reception in your uterus."

She smirked, her hand setting on the back of his neck almost naturally. Edward was briefly distracted by the thrill that ran down his spine at her soft touch.

"This is the baby, right here," Bella said quietly, brushing her finger against the vague shape.

"Are you sure you're not having a baby kidney bean?" he teased, his eyes locked now on the blurry image. He supposed, if one had a good imagination, it was vaguely human shaped.

"That's what I said," she replied, laughing. "It's more the size of an olive, though."

He splayed his hand over the small of her back, rubbing lightly. "What else?" he prompted gently.

Bella blinked, as if she wasn't quite sure what he was asking. He saw when she got it though, and her free hand tentatively moved up to rest on her belly. "Its boy parts or girl parts are forming. And it weighs about as much as a penny." She scrunched up her nose. "And it looks like it's from Mars."

Edward felt his smile broaden, and he instinctually raised his free hand to rest lightly over hers. The joy he felt then was real, and for just a moment, when their eyes met, he didn't have to pretend this was exactly what he wanted.

His mother's chuckle startled both of them, and they looked over at her. Suddenly aware of his surroundings, Edward let Bella go, and she stepped away, sliding back into the seat next to him.

As they resumed eating their meal - which was indeed just as delicious as the smell promised - Edward wondered if he was the only one who noticed the way the atmosphere around them seemed to grow heavy - almost dizzying. It wasn't unpleasant, but it made his brain just a tick or two slower than normal.

He'd just about managed to convince himself he was crazy when Bella looked up at the same time he did. Their eyes met. They were a mirror of what he felt, and his lips tugged up of their own volition just as she smiled shyly, if a little uncertainly, back at him.

Edward was suddenly certain that he wasn't the only one who felt the change in the air.

~0~

After Esme had left, there was an awkward moment of silence where both Edward and Bella lingered in the doorway. Bella couldn't speak for him, but she hadn't been ready to retreat, as they had since they'd gotten home from Las Vegas, to two separate rooms.

So when he'd asked her if she wanted to watch a movie, she'd readily agreed.

What they were watching, Bella couldn't have said. She'd been perched on the couch, her legs drawn up close to her chest, almost since Edward had started the movie - a video on demand rental.

Since then, she'd been thinking about everything and nothing. Which was to say, every time she started to think about anything, her thoughts would melt away, typically wandering back to how it felt earlier at the dinner table when he'd wrapped his arm around her waist.

When he looked into her eyes, his expression gentle and his teasing intimate, she'd felt for the space of a single breath that all was right in the world. She'd felt the way every pregnant woman ought to feel: cherished and safe.

For a couple of heartbeats she let herself believe the lie, and a huge burden had lifted from her shoulders, allowing her to breathe for the first time in over a week.

So though there was so much else to think about, her life and her baby's life being one gigantic question mark, when Bella could focus her thoughts on actual words, she kept fixating on what Esme had said when they were hugging goodbye.

They'd been alone in the foyer for a minute as Edward had run upstairs to get a book he'd promised to lend his father. Esme had hugged Bella tightly and said, "Usually, leaving him here alone almost feels like abandoning him all over again. I'm so happy he has you now."

Being alone in the house, save for the housekeeper whom she had avoided, Bella knew how lonely the large space could get. It had only been one day she'd spent here alone, and even that was tempered by Esme's visit. Edward had been alone here for years.

The more she thought about it, the more she just didn't understand. How could a man like Edward have made it to his thirties without finding someone?

Once curiosity struck her, it was hard to shake. Bella tried to resist, not wanting to seem rude or nosy, but the answer to one question plagued her even more than usual.

"Edward?" she finally asked, breaking the silence.

His answering, "Hmm?" was distracted, and when she glanced over, she saw he was staring sightlessly, as if he too were deep in thought rather than engrossed in the movie.

She bit her lip, again thinking that this was probably rude to ask. That didn't stop her, though. "You've really never had a girlfriend?"

The question definitely caught him off guard as he sucked in a breath, turning to look at her with a startled expression. He tilted his head, one side of his mouth quirking upward, but he didn't answer right away. Instead, he concentrated on locating the remote control, switching the TV off.

Though he seemed calm, there was something definitively anxious in his eyes. Bella almost told him to forget it, wanting to apologize for asking such an intrusive question, but he answered before she could speak.

"Well, there was one girl," he began reluctantly.

Bella rested her head on her knees, turning her attention toward him.

"You must understand, college was a very... humbling experience for me," he said, as if he felt the need to qualify his story. "I'd been raised believing I was a king, or at least that I was as good as one, but at Cornell, I discovered I was … well, not much. People say going away to college is as much a time of self discovery as of higher education, and they'd be right. What no one tells you is that it's a very confusing time."

His expression was wistful, an old fondness in his eyes. "That was when I met Angela Weber. She and I were very alike in many ways, though I will tell you she is unquestionably sweeter than me."

"I doubt that," Bella muttered and ducked her head when she realized she'd spoken out loud.

Edward smiled. "Well, the thing we had most in common is that we were raised by ministers, and neither of us was uh... at all experienced to that point."

He shrugged, looking slightly uncomfortable and sheepish, as if he had reason to be ashamed. "The long and short of it was... it was college. There was a lot of, er, sex being had, and we both felt... inadequate, perhaps is a good word for it. I suppose we felt somewhat unnatural."

"So you turned to each other," she surmised, filling in the blanks.

Edward nodded slowly. "Exactly. We were never really attracted to each other as more than just friends, but because of the way we were both raised, we thought we had to make a go of it."

Bella thought about the implication behind his words. "You mean you tried to have a relationship because you'd had sex?"

"I know it's not a modern notion," he said quietly. "It's just the way we were brought up. We were both feeling somewhat guilty that we didn't save ourselves for marriage."

For a moment, Bella was silent. His words struck her like a sickening blow right at her gut. Before, she'd gotten glimpses of his worldview, but it was beginning to hit her just how much he'd sacrificed on a personal level to marry her.

One thing she suddenly realized was that marriage was important to Edward, sacred. And regardless of how he might brush it off with logic, Bella was acutely aware how much it would hurt Edward to have a divorce under his belt.

Biting down hard on her lip, Bella forced herself back to the present. Edward was watching her, concern knitting his brows together.

She could wish all she wanted for things to be different - that she hadn't been so selfish that night in Vegas or, even better, that she'd been wise enough to tell the asshole who'd chased her away from her home to go to hell before any of this ever happened - but it wouldn't help her deal with reality.

"So, you tried," she prompted, reminding him of the conversation before he could turn his attention to her.

Edward nodded. "We did, but," he chuckled nervously. "We were just ridiculously bad together. We had nothing to talk about besides how much we were coming to resent our father figures - which, you know, is just an inevitable part of being away from home for the first time," he excused quickly.

Bella chuffed. "From what I heard, I think your resentment is perfectly valid, college or not."

"In any event. We tried, but we made each other miserable. We conceded that there were worse sins in the world than having lost our virginity to a friend and left it at that," he finished succinctly. "Since then, there have been... Well, we all have our moments of weakness."

She wanted to ask but felt like she'd been rude enough for the time being. From what she knew of Edward, these weak moments he was referring to were probably just instances where he succumbed to his loneliness, giving in to the comfort of another person's body, their skin against his.

Bella could understand that, and he probably hadn't been nearly as idiotic as she had.

"So, what about you?" She raised her head to find he was looking at her, his eyes wandering her face and body in a way that made her feel like smiling. "I bet you had plenty of boyfriends."

She ran her hands through her hair, bashful, but her lips lifted at the corners. "Not really. Just the one." She unwound herself, letting her bare feet touch the carpet, stretching in her seat. "It's completely cliché, actually. He asked me out, we dated, we kissed, and we held hands in the hallways at school." Her eyes darted to his, her cheeks tinting. "We even had the uh... obligatory prom night."

All things considered, though that night hadn't been spectacular, Bella was somewhat glad that the baby's crazy father hadn't been her first. Mike was not special, but he'd been sweet. When she remembered his clumsy touch on her body, she didn't feel sickened the way she did when she remembered the one night she spent with... him.

Bella shrugged, sitting up a little straighter on the couch. "It was a nice but shallow relationship. I got to the point where I realized, I was just staying because it was something to do." She looked up at him with a small smile. "I didn't really know what I wanted in a relationship - I still don't know, really. It just..."

"You wanted more than that?" Edward inserted.

"I did," she agreed. With a sigh, she felt her smile falter, the darker thoughts that had been briefly chased away by the new warmth in the air between them returning with a vengeance. It struck her that she wasn't going to ever get to think about things like that - her relationships - in terms of only what she wanted. Her life wasn't her own anymore.

"Mike went back to California, where his mother lives, for school," she said, speaking out loud more to fill the silence than anything. She didn't want to get overwhelmed by her quickly meandering thoughts. "His dad owns the store I work... worked at."

The way Edward looked at her, Bella was almost certain he was going to press her about what was bothering her. She knew her anxiety had to be written on her face, and he was annoyingly observant.

"What kind of store did you work at?" he asked instead.

"Newton's Outfitters is an outdoor recreation supply store. It's the biggest store in Forks," she explained. "I started to work there part-time in high school and continued on while I went to the local community college until..." Her smile faltered, and she looked down at her hands. "I was supposed to go on to a University, after I finished my AA, but things didn't work that way."

"How did they work?" he prompted quietly.

"What little money was saved had to be used to cover Dad's funeral cost," she said in a shaky voice. "I started to go back to the community college this last semester, but I was working full time at the store by then, so I could only take a few classes."

"What were you planning on majoring in?"

She looked a little sheepish. "Really, I hadn't decided. I've had a pipe dream since I was little," she hedged. "I wasn't really going to do it, but I thought about being an interior designer."

"I'm not sure I understand why that's a pipe dream," Edward said, sounding genuinely perplexed.

"I don't know. It seems a little," she paused a moment, thinking, "fanciful, I guess?" She blew out a slow breath. "Like maybe I should be thinking about something a little more tangible - business or something like that."

"Interior design is as valid a career choice as any and not as abstract as say, being an artist or something to that effect," he pointed out. "It's a good field that will allow you a creative outlet."

She thought about that, wanting to refute it automatically but finding no grounds. "I guess you're right. It's a little easier to consider it in a bigger city. In Forks it wouldn't have been an option, unless I didn't want to make a living."

"It's funny," he said slowly after a moment. "I had the impression you didn't want to stay in Forks."

"Oh, I didn't," she said, startled at the conclusion he'd arrived at. Running her hands through her hair, she gave a short, humorless laugh. "It's been a really long time since I've thought about things like this, about any kind of future," she admitted quietly. "Really, I think I've been living one day to the next, just keeping my head above water since my dad died. All of those plans... they seem like they belong to a girl that doesn't exist anymore."

A/N: Thanks to barburella, jfka06, and GinnyW. Speaking of GinnyW - she's reposting Coming to Terms over on her profile. If you haven't read it, now's the time! It's my favorite fandom preggo story.