Guess who's back?

Yes friends, I have returned with a new laptop and a determination to write! (at least hopefully I do)

So I'm biting the bullet and writing this chapter, which I've had planned out for a while, so hopefully it'll come easy to me.

As always, don't forget to review! Hearing feedback on what you think of the story honestly makes my day, I love to know how my story is effecting my readers, so please let me know!

Oh and PS

Grab the tissues for this chapter...just saying

Chapter Thirty-three: Innocence lost.

"Ryder, can you hear me?" Lisa asks desperately, small hands working to wipe the sweat off his face as she kneels beside him.

He'd been gaining consciousness off and on, but hadn't woken up in the past three hours. His shaking had gotten worse, and Lisa was helpless to stop it, she could only sit with him and watch him grow paler and weaker.

"Ryder!" She sobs desperately, shaking him slightly as he still fails to wake up. "Open your eyes! Talk to me!"

He remains motionless, his breathing shallow and labored.

Lisa bursts into tears and collapses onto his chest, tiny fingers gripping the front of his shirt as she buries her face against his chest and sobs.

"Please...please don't die…" Her frail shoulders shake as the sobs wracked her small body. "Please...just don't die...I can't...I don't want you to die."

"I'm not...going anywhere."

She shoots up, hands still gripping his shirt. Her face lights up when she sees his eyes are open. "Ryder! You're awake!" Impulsively, she kisses his cheek, overcome with joy.

He smiles and chuckles lightly as she looks embarrassed and blushes. "Hey, if I'd known how worried you were, I wouldn't have taken that little nap."

She sobs in relief and wipes the tears from her cheeks as more threaten to flood her eyes. "I-I didn't kn-know what to d-do, I was s-so scared."

He shakily lifts his hand and places it over one of hers, completely enveloping her small hand with his. Curling his fingers around her hand, he smiles at her weakly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you."

She shook her head. "No, it's not your fault. Just get better, okay?"

He nods. "Yes ma'am."

I'm relieved to see that he's awake, although his condition doesn't seem to be improving, it's also doesn't appear to be growing any worse.

I glance at the clock and calculate how much time has passed, roughly thirteen hours, Dash would be back with the money for the medicine in around eleven hours.

Turning back to the screen, I clench my fists and mutter. "Just hold on a little longer, Ryder, help is coming."

Lisa helps Ryder sit up and lean against a tree, then convinces him to eat and drink something, he does with no complaint, and after eating some food and sipping some water, he begins to look a little stronger.

"How much food do we have left?" He asks.

Lisa shrugs. "Enough to last us a little while."

He turns his head slightly and glances at the river. "Wonder if those carnivorous fish taste any good, we could catch some."

Lisa wrinkles her nose in disgust. "I don't think we should try and eat them, besides, there are plenty of other things we can eat."

Ryder rests his head back against the tree trunk and raises his eyebrows. "Oh? Like what?"

She shrugs. "Fruit and nuts, and probably some small mammals we can trap."

Ryder glances toward the thick of the jungle as a loud cry pierces the air, followed by several more in reply. "I wonder if monkeys taste any good."

Lisa shivers. "Monkeys freak me out, I saw one while we were in the capitol, this lady had it as a pet. It scared me half to death, why anyone would keep one as a pet is beyond me."

Ryder starts to laugh, holding a hand across his stomach as he trails off into coughing.

Lisa frowns. "What are you laughing at?"

He shakes his head slightly, still grinning. "Of all the things in the world to be scared of, you're afraid of monkeys. You realize there are probably like, tigers and stuff in here, right?" He begins to laugh again. "And you're worried about the monkeys!"

Lisa crosses her arms and pouts. "I don't see what's so funny about that, monkeys are freaky!"

Ryder takes a deep breath and then shifts slightly against the tree trunk. "Man, I can't remember the last time I laughed...thanks."

She huffed. "Glad I amuse you so."

He nudged her leg with the toe of his boot. "Hey, come on, I'm sorry for laughing at you."

She stays pouty for a few more moments, then smiles. "It's okay, I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before...it was nice to hear something like that in here."

His cheeks tinge pink, and he glances away from her.

"Looks like someone's got a crush!"

I jump in surprise as Eliza plops down into the chair beside me, I hadn't even heard her come into the room.

"Eliza...what are you-" And then I remember Dash said he'd ask the other mentors who'd lost their tributes to come check in on me. "Dash."

"Bingo." She says, punching something into the food service touch screen before turning back to me. "How you holding up?"

I shrug. "Better now that Ryder's awake."

She nodded. "Good to see the kid looking better, you think he'll recover from the fever on his own?"

I shake my head. "I don't know, but probably not, at least not fully."

Eliza crosses her arms and leans back in her chair, eyes scanning the wall of screens. "He's a tough kid, he'll pull through this."

I sigh and nod. "I know…" Then, to change the subject I ask. "What was that you said about someone having a crush?"

Eliza grinned. "Can't you tell? I mean, they are your tributes after all, you didn't pick up on the signs during training and everything?"

I frown, thinking back. "I don't know...who has a crush on who?"

She winked. "Ah, that is the question, isn't it? I'd put my money on Lisa crushing on Ryder, I mean who wouldn't! That teen is cute, and sweet and strong, just imagine what a hunk he'll be when he's older."

I glance back at the screen portraying my tributes. Now that I think about it, maybe Lisa does like Ryder, it would make sense.

"Hmm...maybe you're right."

She laughs. "That's not even the best part! I think he's beginning to like her too. He might be suppressing his feelings though because she seems so much younger, even though it's only a four year age gap between them."

I smile slightly as I watch them laugh and talk with each other, remembering when I first realized I'd liked Felix. Then the gut wrenching pain is there, and I force myself not to think about it anymore. Only one of them can make it out...only one.

Eliza seems to realize what I'm thinking, and she reaches over and grabs my hand, not saying anything, not needing to, she just sits there and grips my hand tightly in hers, offering me her silent support.

A few minutes later and the food she orders arrives, snack food and coffee. She motions to the tray and raises her eyebrows at me. "Go on and eat, you need to keep up your strength."

I nibble on a pastry as I glance at the clock. "It's getting late, you should go get some sleep."

She glances at the clock while pouring us both cups of coffee. "Look at that, almost ten already. I'll be fine, slept most of today anyway."

We sip our coffee in silence and watch the screens. Lisa and Ryder talk some more, eat and drink some, and then relax as dark sets in completely.

"Is it nice?"

I glance over at her, but her face is directed toward the screens. "Is what nice?"

"Having Felix."

The question catches me off guard, and for a moment I don't answer. Then I say quietly. "Yeah...it is."

She stays silent for a few moments. "I don't think I've ever really been in love before. Before my games...well there wasn't really any time for boys, I was too busy trying to survive. Then afterwards…" She shrugged. "What with the capitol calling me into their bedrooms every chance they got, and having to relive the games every year...it seemed kind of pointless." She sighed. "But then I hear you talk about Felix, I see the way Heather and Leo look at each other, and I think...maybe it is all worth it. Then I remember what I've been through, and what I will have to continue going through for the rest of my life, and I know I'm too weak to love anyone. I wouldn't be able to handle it."

"Dash told me...about…" I trail off, not sure of how to say it.

She glances over and gives me a sad smile before looking down at her wrists. "They took the scars away...the capitolites calling for me didn't want to see me marked."

I pull my sleeves up and turn my wrists up. "I told them to leave mine, I need the reminder."

Eliza looks at my marked skin in surprise. "I...I didn't know."

I shrug and pull my sleeves back down. "Apparently so don't a lot of people."

She sighs and rubs her forehead. "We are one messed up bunch, aren't we?"

I nod. "Yeah."

She stays with me for around another hour, we chat about random things and eat more food and drink coffee. I finally convince her to go get some rest, and she promises to send someone else to come spend time with me soon.

As the door closes behind her, I turn my full attention back on my tributes. They've both fallen asleep now, Lisa curled up beside Ryder to help ward off the chill night air. He has an arm wrapped around her small shoulders, and his head rests against hers.

I smile slightly at the sight, then my blood turns to ice as the hazard alarm starts blaring.

I frantically scan the other screens to try and see what's causing the alarm, what is putting my tributes in danger?

"No...no, no, no, no!" I scream, my eyes glued to the glint of metal among a pile of bushes. "Ryder! Lisa! Wake up! WAKE UP!"

But of course, they can't hear me, blissfully unaware of the danger they're in, peacefully sleeping beside each other.

I sob hopelessly, my brain working on overdrive in an attempt to figure this out.

Suddenly Lisa sits bolt upright, her head turning this way and that. Did she hear something?

She shakes Ryder, whispering urgently. "Ryder! Wake up, I think someo-" She trails off, her eyes widening in terror as a head of short fiery red hair emerges from the underbrush.

"Well, well, well, look at that? Looks like we caught a couple of fishes." Trina says, her rough voice breaking the previous silence in the clearing.

Queen appears beside her, icy eyes staring down at Ryder and Lisa.

Jasper suddenly appears, completing the career pack. His brow is lined slightly, whether from anger or worry I can't tell. His head is bandaged from when Ryder knocked him out at the start of the games.

He could very easily be holding a massive grudge against Ryder for that, Ryder betrayed his trust and made him seem weak to the other careers.

Lisa's gripping Ryder's shirt tightly with one hand, and a long dagger with the other.

Trina seems amused by this, and she smiles cruelly. "Aw, how cute, this minnow thinks she can face sharks."

Queen's eyes flicker to Ryder. "What's wrong with your district partner?" Her voice is low and cold, like a winter breeze.

Jasper peers at Ryder for a moment. "Looks like he's sick or something."

Trina laughs. "Well I guess that just makes our job that much easier. I'll admit I was a little worried about facing him, but now he's just a pitiful, helpless worm like all the rest of you."

Lisa's grip tightens on the dagger, and she stands up slowly, her small figure rigid and ready. "Not all of us are helpless."

Trina laughs again, holding a hand to her stomach as she does.

Queen stays silent, eyeing Lisa warily.

I can see Lisa's mind working for a strategy, trying to find a way out.

Ryder suddenly stirs, and opens his eyes. He looks paler than he has been, and much weaker than he was earlier. "L-Lisa?" His voice is frail, the fever has drained him completely.

"Ryder, the careers are here."

His eyes widen and he tries to force himself up, but only manages to get into a sitting position before his strength leaves him. "Lisa, run!" He says urgently.

"I'm not leaving you behind."

Trina's laughter is a cruel ambiance as Ryder cries out in frustration. "Stop being stupid! Run! I'm not going to last much longer anyway, only one makes it out, right? Well it's gotta be you, go!"

Lisa's eyes fill with tears, and she grips the dagger with both hands. "I won't leave you!"

"So sweet of you, but you'd better listen to him, I'm not all that concerned about fighting you, it'd be simpler to just kill you now, but it might be fun to watch you suffer a little first. If you run now we promise not to chase you for at least a day, we've got to finish him off anyway."

Lisa shook her head. "No, I'm not running away."

Jasper's eyes are flickering from Lisa and Ryder to Trina and Queen, the latter of which seems rather bored with the exchange.

"Lisa!" Ryder shouts, managing to pull himself up on his knees by supporting himself against the tree trunk. "Give me my sword and then run!"

Lisa kicks his sword back to him, never taking her eyes off the careers. "I'm not running!"

Ryder barely manages to pick up his sword, then with some reserve of strength, he manages to stand and take a step forward. "Lisa...go, please."

She has tears running down her cheeks now. "I-I can't leave you."

He puts his hand on her shoulder, eyes set grimly on the careers. "I don't know how much longer I can stand, the fever is going to kill me soon anyway, you can survive this."

She shakes her head. "I don't...I don't want to! I don't want you to die!"

He smiles slightly and grips her shoulder. "I know...I'm sorry."

She sobs and steps toward the careers. "Just leave us alone! What's the point of all this?"

Trina lifts her weapon, which I first thought was a spear, but now that I can see if fully, I realize it's a long scythe, both edges razor sharp and glinting in the moonlight.

She smiles wickedly. "Because it's fun."

She lashes out at Lisa, who jumps back and manages to deflect the blow with her dagger.

But Trina was just toying with her, and I can tell by the easy way she wields the scythe, that she knows how to use it. "I'm going to enjoy cutting you up little princess." She hisses, the light in her eyes sending shivers down my spine.

Ryder pushes Lisa behind him, and lifts his sword, eyes dark and dangerous as he faces Trina. "You touch her and I'll make you scream for death."

Queen and Jasper look taken aback by this sudden cold savagery from him, but Trina's eyes merely light up further.

Before she has time to attack, Ryder launches himself at her, knowing that if he can get close enough, her scythe will be useless.

Trina's taken off guard, not expecting someone so sick to be able to move so fast. She swings but he ducks the blade and knocks the shaft away as he draws closer to her.

She jumps back to avoid his sword blade, her cheekbone begins to bleed from a small nick showing that she wasn't quite fast enough.

Before either of them can make another move, Lisa's scream halts them both. "Ryder!"

He dodges out of range of Trina's scythe before turning toward Lisa.

Queen has a handful of her hair, and a knife to her throat, she looks slightly pissed off and is bleeding from several cuts on her arms, apparently Lisa got a few hits in.

Ryder freezes, then snarls at Queen. "Let her go!"

Queen narrows her cold eyes. "I don't think so, why don't you drop your sword and then we'll talk?"

Ryder hesitates.

"Ryder, no!" Lisa shouts. "Run!"

He smiles slightly. "You wouldn't run, so I'm not going to either."

Tears stream down her cheeks as she holds Queen's arm, trying to relieve some of the pressure of the blade at her throat.

Trina chuckles. "You can't hold out much longer, Four, give up now and we'll still let your little pet go."

"Ryder, don't." Lisa starts, then hisses as the blade is pressed further against her throat, barely breaking the surface of the skin.

Ryder sighs, and drops his sword, kicking it away from him in defeat.

Lisa sobs, Trina smiles in victory and motions with her blade for Jasper to pick up Ryder's sword.

He does, then pulls back out of the way.

Ryder begins to shake, then falls to his knees, strength completely spent. "Let...let her go." He says weakly.

Trina smirks, then turns to Queen. "Finish her."

Ryder's scream is echoed by mine as Queen jerks her arm back, drawing a line of blood across Lisa's neck, she releases her hair and steps back.

Ryder lunges for her, but collapses a few feet away, too weak to move any closer.

Lisa's eyes are full of tears, and blood pools in her mouth before sliding out from between her pale lips. She coughs, then falls to the ground, crimson life pooling out beneath her.

Ryder is screaming, his voice agonized and desperate.

Queen flicks the blood off her knife, then casually walks back over to Trina. "Want me to finish him off?"

Trina is watching with evil interest. "No, it'll be much more fun to watch him suffer. The fever will finish him off for us, might as well let him die knowing he was too weak to save her."

Suddenly Jasper roars and lunges for Trina. "You sadistic, bitch!"

She gasps in shock, and turns to face him just as Ryder's sword passes through her. She shrieks in pain, the sword still sticking out of her shoulder as she lunges for Jasper.

He dodges back, getting cut across his chest from her scythe before blocking it with his own sword.

"Traitor!" Trina shrieks.

Jasper glances at Ryder and Lisa. "I'm sorry." He gasps, before turning and bolting into the underbrush.

Trina continues to shriek and starts to go after him.

Queen stops her. "What about them?"

Trina glances back. "Forget them! They're both dead, I want to slice up that little bastard!"

Queen grabs Ryder and Lisa's packs off the ground before nodding. "Fine, we'll track Jasper down, but first we should retreat back to camp and fix up our wounds, I need to remove that sword before you bleed to death.

Trina hisses in frustration, but nods in agreement. "Let's go."

They leave, and the clearing falls silent again except for the sound of Ryder's sobs.

He's managed to crawl all the way over to Lisa, and is now holding her hand tightly as the last of her life leaves her. "I...I-I'm sorry." He sobs, tears streaming down his cheeks.

Lisa squeezes his hand, as if to say "it's okay" and then her body goes limp, and the cannon sounds.

I didn't even realize I'd been screaming, but now the sound registers in my ears, and I find myself feeling like I'm about to explode.

"She's dead...she's dead...she's dead…" I'm repeating to myself over and over, my body still trying to process what just happened. I feel hands on my arms, but I pull away from them. "She's dead...she's dead…"

The hands are there again, this time much stronger. "SHE'S DEAD!" I scream, my voice echoing through the room, I sob hysterically and cling to the arms holding me. "She's dead!" I wail, blinded by the tears flooding my eyes. "NO!"

I struggle to get closer to the screens, to find some way to help her, to make it better. "NO! I Have to save her!"

"Mags! It's too late!" The deep voice is close to my ear, and the owner registers in my brain. Kaden.

"Please no!"

He holds me tightly. "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry."

"I...I...I couldn't s-save her…"

"It's not your fault, Mags, it's not your fault."

I scream again and completely break down in his arms, my chest aching painfully at how violent my sobs are.

Later I would learn that Ryder was in much the same position I was, clinging to Lisa's body as he sobbed and apologized over and over to her.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Lisa...Lisa open your eyes, please...I'm sorry...I couldn't...I couldn't save you...Lisa…" He lets out a cry, his voice agonized and broken.

He stayed with her body until the hovercraft came, staring numbly at the spot where her blood stained the ground as she was lifted up into the sky, like an angel ascending into heaven.

He winced and swayed, his face deathly white. The fever had taken its hold, and he was dying. Fine he thought let me go to her.

Just before he passed out, he heard a rustling in the bushes, and saw a dark figure stand over him as the darkness claimed him.