A/N: I really hope you like this. It was my favourite chapter by far…

IMPORTANT NOTE: Now it really kills me to do this, but i sort of have to, I am going to wait for at least one or two more reviews other than Tori, and Miss P, before i upload or write the next one. I normally hate it when people do this, but i've been surviving on 1-2 reviews per chap is i'm lucky and i'm starting to feel like I'm putting a lot of my time in to do this, but not getting much out of it. Seriously all you silent readers out there, just one comment, with something about what's going on and if you like or not something, please!

Chapter 32- time to make things right.

Even though many people would probably say otherwise, I'm not an idiot. I knew Romeo didn't love me. And I knew the last few weeks had just been meaningless sex to him. I wasn't deluded enough to think he had suddenly realised the error of his ways and fallen in love with me. I also wasn't stupid enough to think the timing was a coincidence when Romeo changed his mind and I had ruined things between him and Juliet, so I knew he probably wished it was her who he spent his nights with, not me.

It just wasn't meant to be this way. Romeo was supposed to come back to Verone, and be my boyfriend and then I would really have everything, the looks, the money, head cheerleader (which inevitably came with the popularity). And the groups Alpha male should be with the Alpha Female right?. The idea had been suck in my mind so long, and I had been fighting for it all to work out, that somewhere along the line I had convinced myself that it was what I wanted.

The moment Romeo had rejected me in his kitchen, it had knocked me because being rejected wasn't something I was used to, and I had been mad knowing that of all people it was Juliet Capulet who had one over on me. He wasn't supposed to actually fall in love with her, it was all meant to be a plan. At the time I was mad that she had what I was convinced should have been mine. So I went back to my safety net, the one guy who always made me feel special and when he had rejected me too, two rejections in one day, combined with the excessive amount of alcohol in my system had caused me to ruin things for everyone else, namely Juliet and Romeo. If I couldn't be happy, why should they? ….Right?

The night before the joint after party at the basketball game, the conversation that I had overheard during half time in the hallway after coming out of the bathroom became handy. Overhearing Juliet and Romeo's conversation about their plans for that night gave me the knowledge I needed to really push Juliet over the edge and really make her believe Romeo wasn't into her from the start. And from her reaction when I mentioned about her being a virgin, I knew it had worked. But seeing the process of her breakdown right in front of me didn't feel as good as I imagined it would, and saying it didn't bring Romeo back to me either.

I wasn't totally deluded. I knew what I had done was wrong which I could see from the hurt coming from her, and the look on everybody else's face. So there I was hiding away from the rest of the group in embarrassment staying within the confines of my house for a few days, knowing I had royally messed up, when the last person I had expected to turn up on my doorstep did. At the time, the only feeling running through my body was ecstasy as I believed everything had worked itself out.

If I look back now, I could be honest and pin point the exact moment when I realised something was off. The second he put his lips onto mine in the doorway of my house. But I had pushed any doubt to the back of my mind, convinced that this was what I wanted, and it had been a while since I had been with Romeo and any uncertainty I was feeling would disappear when we got back into the swing of things. By the second day, in fact by the first night, I knew it wasn't a case of getting used to things, and by then I just hoped Romeo would realise I was what he wanted. Back then I thought he would have to get his feelings in check because it takes two to tango, but what I didn't realise was neither of us were doing the dance.

When I did realise that maybe it was me that didn't have any real romantic feelings for Romeo, I tried to ignore the nagging voice in my mind, trying to overwrite it with my constant reassurance that this is what I wanted.

When Ben walked into the room, I instantly felt bad, as if I should be feeling guilty for something. We weren't an item, so really I should have no reason to be ashamed to be caught by Ben, dressed in a sheet, not leaving to the imagination what activity me and Romeo had been taking part in.

If you told me a few months ago that I would be saying this now, I would probably have had you committed to the nearest hospital, but here I am saying 'sleeping with Romeo was starting to feel like a chore', so it wasn't like I was enjoying it while I tried to think about my feelings.

I had just gotten home from leaving Romeo's after Ben had arrived, and was trying to find a good enough excuse to get out of meeting up with Romeo tonight when the doorbell rang, and for the second time in the last couple of weeks, I was surprised to see Romeo there.

He looked visibly better than I had seen him in the last couple of weeks. It looked like he had taken a shower and cut his hair since I had left his house about an hour ago. I immediately felt a pang of regret of not making sure he was ok earlier. It was clear something was bothering him while he was with me, but I had chosen to ignore it. Romeo was my friend and I should have put that before anything else. Ben had obviously done the right thing and said something to him whilst he was over that made him feel better. Ben was always there for everyone. He made out he didn't care about other people, but he was always there for all his friends whenever they needed him, like the time he stayed up with me all night to help me study for my calculus final even though he had a basketball game the next morning, and the time he stayed with me just because I didn't want to be alone when my parents were going through their divorce.

"Hey," I said, not knowing what else to say. He was standing by the front shifting his weight from either foot. He looked nervous.

He said hello back and I led him out to the deck. We both sat in silence. He was playing with the clasp on his watch and I was pushing down my cuticles. We were behaving like strangers; you never would have guessed we were the same two people who were engaging in very friendly activities just a few hours ago.

"So—" I started at the same he said , "Rose—"

We both stopped at hearing the other start talking.

"You go first," he said.

I didn't know where to start but I knew I had to go through with this. This is the last thing I ever thought I would be doing.

"Romeo. I care about you a lot—" I began.

"Rose—"he said stopping me and sitting up.

I put my hand up to gesture for him to stop and let me speak. I knew if I stopped now there was a big chance I would finish. He nodded and meekly sat back in his chair.

"Like I was saying, I care about you a lot. We've been friends since we were toddlers," I said smiling, "and we're great together, we make a pair of friends, but I don't think we're doing the right thing by being together as a couple," I said then held my breath.

"You don't?" he said with a shocked look on his face.

"I thought this was what I wanted, hell I've wanted it for so long, and when you came back I didn't give myself a minute to think about if it was still what I wanted. And I know it's not what you want." I said looking down. I knew I wasn't who he wanted, and I knew he was using me to get over something, or someone namely Juliet , I was guessing, but I couldn't do this anymore, I would only be hurting myself in the end.

Romeo sat forward again and took one of my hands.

"I'm so sorry," he said.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, I'm a big girl, you didn't force me to be with you. And let's face it, you probably wouldn't have been in this mess if I hadn't spilled the beans," I said feeling bad.

"Well if you didn't say something, she would have still found out somehow and it wasn't your fault I got into this plan with the boys in the first place," he said

I nodded and smiled.

"Well if it's any consolation, I think she really likes you," I said.

"If I haven't screwed it up already," he said.

"Just talk to her."

"Thanks Rose," he said. "You're a good friend."

I smiled softly.

"You'll find the guy you're meant to be with," he said and I could tell he really meant it.

We both stood up and he walked to the other side of the table and he gave me a hug.

"He might be closer than you think," he said and kissed the top of my head before he left.

X x x x x

Ben POV

I walked up to the front door balancing the box of decorations my Mom had given me to drop off to Mrs Mitchinson. My Mom was planning a surprise birthday party for my Dad and Mrs Mitchinson agreed to keep all the supplies for the party at her house so the surprised wasn't ruined if my Dad stumbled across anything.

I couldn't reach the doorbell with the big box in my hands and was about to set it down when I noticed the side gate open, and walked over to it letting myself in. I had practically spent half my childhood at the house since I was young, so I knew it wasn't a problem.

"Hello?" I called walking through the gate into the garden. I was hoping that only Mrs Mitchinson would be home and I wouldn't have to encounter Rose. It was terrible seeing her this morning at Romeo's but seeing her in her own house was worse in a way. We had spent countless hours together in her house, but now I just felt a different vibe radiating the walls. Also before at Romeo's my attention had been on him, but I would have no choice but to talk to her in her own house especially if she was the only one home.

As soon as I got home and mentioned to my Mom that I no longer had to go and pick up Izzie, she had sent me over here, and I couldn't very well tell her why I didn't want to go. So my aim was to get in, drop the box and get out.

I was about to head over to the back door when I noticed Rose sitting on the huge stone bolder at the end of the garden. Me and Rose had always loved the huge rock and had been fascinated with it since we had been young. We used to have picnic's on it, and study on it , and on more than one occasion just lay out on it, watching the night whilst talking. We had had every meaningful conversation we had ever had on that rock. I had never seen her crying on it though, and as much as my head told me to ignore her and go into the house in search of her mother, I couldn't help but go over.

My shadow cast over her and she stopped crying and she quickly dried her tears before turning around to see who was there.

She visibly relaxed seeing it was only me, then as though she remembered what had gone on between us recently, her face changed to confusion and another emotion I couldn't read.

"Are you ok?" I said unable to stop myself. Even though she had stopped shedding tears her eyes were still glassy and were reflecting the moon light. Her hair was in a mess and she wasn't wearing any makeup, a rare occurrence. Her innocence shone out and she looked younger than she normally did, showing her vulnerability. The only other time I had ever seen her like this was when he parents split up. I repeatedly told myself I didn't care, but I couldn't very well just leave her outside by herself when something was obviously wrong with her. I would ask to be polite then excuse myself and leave, I tried telling myself again.

"I'm fine, Romeo and me just broke up," she said, then added as an afterthought, "Although I don't think we had anything to break up."

Oh, so that was what she was upset about. Romeo had come over already and told her he wasn't interested. Well obviously she would be upset considering all she ever wanted was to be Romeo's girlfriend , if you could even call what she was that, and now it was over. I just didn't think it would affect this badly.

"Oh, Romeo told you he was bored of sleeping with you?" I said meanly, unable to stop myself. No matter how much I though she deserved, after seeing the shattered look on her face I regretted saying it.

"No, actually I broke up with him," she said shrugging.

"You did?" I said shocked. That's the last thing I ever thought would happen.

She nodded, her eyes stuck on the rock she was sitting on. I set down the box on the floor and sat down next to her, not quite touching. So much for going in, dropping the box and getting out. The small space between us felt like we were sitting a mile apart.

"Why would you do that?" I asked. This is what she had wanted all along, and the whole reason that 'we' wouldn't work. I had to know the reason good enough that made me give it all up.

X x x x x

Rose POV

I didn't have the energy to make something up, and I was sure I had exceeded my limit of feeding Ben crap lately.

"It just wasn't right," I said shrugging. "I thought it was what I wanted but none of it felt right. Me and Ro are better off as friends."

"Maybe it is what you want, maybe you just think it feels wrong because Romeo wasn't into it," he said.

I immediately shook my head. "No, it wasn't that. It was definitely me. I think I liked the idea of me and Romeo more than I liked me and Romeo actually together."

"Well if the ball was in your court, why are you so upset?" he said, and I internally rolled my eyes at the basketball analogy, any chance those boys get.

"I don't know. I'm not upset that I'm not with Romeo, I'm just upset about where I am right now," I said, trying to make my feelings into words.

"You're not making sense," he said confused.

"I'm just mad that I've wasted some much time hell bent on getting together with Romeo. And now that it's all over, I don't know where I stand. For so long everything has revolved around my 'big plan' for myself," I said. After Romeo had gone, I felt relieved but lost within myself. I was also mad at myself for ignoring what was right under my nose the whole time. I would be lying if I said I had never felt anything for Ben all these years, but I know now that I had been repressing anything I did feel and now it was all coming back and the intensity of my feelings really hit me.

"I'm sure you'll be fine," he said in a humouring tone, and I could tell he thought I was the poor little popular girl who was now seeing outside her little bubble. In a way yes that was true, but it was more than that.

"Anyway I have to go," he said jumping off the bolder and picking up the box he came in with.

"Your Mom..?" he said nodding to the box.

I vaguely recalled my Mom telling me about Mrs Callaway coming to drop over some things for her husband's birthday party.

"Oh right. She's out with my sister, you can just leave it here, I'll take it in."

He placed it on the floor, and then didn't quite know what to do with himself.

"So I guess I should…." He said tilting his head toward the gate. He didn't wait for me to say anything but began to leave.

"Benjy!" I called after him. I was still feeling daring like earlier and knew it was now or never.

I saw him tense at the use of his nickname, before he turned around.

Now that I could see him straight on, I didn't know how I could even begin what I wanted to say.

It turns out I didn't have to elaborate because he took one look at my pleading face and knew something along the lines of what I wanted to say. I saw the recognition pass on his face before his expression changed to annoyance.

"Oh for god's sake Rose! You have to be kidding me!" he yelled.

"Ben." I said trying to console him.

"You don't even know what else to say do you? I can't believe you even have the nerve to try it on!" he said, not lowering his voice at all.

"Try what on? And have the nerve to say what? That I have feelings for you? And I think I love you?" I said, confused at the way he was acting.

"You don't love me Rose!" he threw his hands in the air and began pacing.

"Yes I do!" I said, my tone matching his, trying to convince him of it. This was the last way I expected him to act. I knew I didn't deserve for expect him to be ecstatic that I finally returned his feelings and then fall into my arms but I didn't expect him to get angry with me.

"No you don't! You're just being typical Rose! You're doing what you did when Romeo left all those years ago and what you did after he rejected you after you took your fucking clothes off for him in his kitchen all over again! You only think you love me because you don't have Romeo anymore! Well I'm sick and tired of being your consolation prize!"

"It's not like that! I do love you! I just didn't realise it until I …..lost you." I said, my voice returning back to its normal tone, when I said the last two words, realising them myself then and there.

I had been feeling lost ever since I had had the argument with Ben back at the party. Normally I would spend a lot of free time I had with Ben just hanging out but since we had our falling out I felt like something had been missing.

"Well your timing is pretty damn convenient isn't it? Just when you're all alone! God Rose, you need to grow up!" For the last sentence he readopted his normal voice, and looked at me sympathetically and I felt my insides break.

Why couldn't I get my shit together at the right time! Now I had royally messed everything up and Ben had made it obvious there was no way he could just forget everything.

Now that I look back, Ben was the obvious choice. He was always there for me when I needed him, and he treated me like gold. Ben was always the one person who knew the real me and was able to look past the image I had built for myself. Why did I always ruin everything that mattered!

I couldn't help but restart my flow of tears. I covered my face with my hands in embarrassment. I heard Ben sigh then come and sit beside me.

"Rosie…" he started but trailed off not quite knowing what to say.

I moved my hands and looked up at him. "I really screwed up didn't I?"

"I hate to say it but yeah you did," he said. He moved his hand toward my own, but then moved it away as if he changed his mind. I ignored his move and took his own hand in my own, and I took it as a good sign he didn't remove it. This was the most physical contact we had had for weeks.

"I just don't know what to do anymore. I know you don't believe me but I really love you Ben. I'm so sorry I didn't realise it sooner."

"I think you just need to spend some time of your own to realise what you really want," he said with a sigh, and I could tell he still believed I only wanted him because I didn't have Romeo.

"I know who I want," I said forcefully. "I want you."

"Yeah, I want you too Rose but sometimes that's not enough."

I sharply looked up to him, hearing his words.

Almost in reply to my unasked question he said, "Look Rose, I love you, I have since forever but I can't just forget everything that's happened. You may think you want me now but I don't ever want to feel like your second choice ever again."

I tensed up with frustration. I know I fully deserved what he was saying but hearing it voiced stung.

"You aren't my second choice and you never will be ever," I tried again, this time in a whisper.

"Right now Rose, I'm not ready to take that chance," he said letting go of my hand, and my heart broke. This was it, it was all over. I had truly lost my best friend. I couldn't believe he actually admitted he didn't want to bet on me right now.

"So what, that's it? We both love each other but we aren't going to be together? That doesn't make any sense," I cried.

"I don't know what to tell you Rose," he said shaking his head and it was then I realised how much I must have hurt him for him to put this wall up between us. He didn't deserve it, and I realised how selfish I had been. If I thought I was hurting it was nothing compared to him. I never wanted to be the cause of his pain again.

"So this is really it huh?"

"I don't know about the future, but for now I can't be in a relationship with you."

I stared ahead of my, unable to meet his eyes. What he said sounded like his final words and I knew he would get up and leave any second now. I few seconds later when I didn't hear any signs of him leaving I turned around and saw him lying backwards on the rock staring up at the sky.

"You're not leaving?" I asked.

"As much as I want to, you were always my friend first Rosie and I'm not going to leave you here all alone," he said still looking upwards at the sky.

I fully understood his reasons for not wanting to be with me but I would never forgive myself if I didn't try one last time. I slowly moved toward him, making it obvious what I was about to do, and giving him plenty of time of move out of the way if he wanted to, but he didn't which I took as a good sign.

I moved my face closer to his and his eyes stayed open until the last possible second. I pressed my lips gently onto his and I felt the electricity fizzle through us. We had kissed many times before but this time it was different. It was gentle and innocent but it contained more feelings on both of our parts that ever before.

When I pulled away, he reached for my hand and took hold of it and through its squeeze I knew the kiss had meant a lot to both of us but it had changed nothing.

He gently tugged on my hand and I lay down beside him with my head on his chest, joining him in gazing at an unknown star.

I knew Ben would always be in my life, I didn't doubt that. We both meant too much to each other for that to happen. I knew it would take a lot more for us to be more than friends, but I could only hope. But for now I closed my eyes and savoured the moment, pretending that our conversation had gone down differently and we were together and we were happy, and everything would be ok.

X x x x

I think I'm officially in love with Rose/Ben …it broke my heart a little to write this. I was reading it back when I finished and actually couldn't but go 'ahhhh…' out loud… Do you like them?

I didn't think I would but I loved writing Rose's story and from her POV! I've been avoiding it until now but I couldn't get enough! My aim was for you guys to think she was a bitch and want her to die, then read a chap from her POV and like her….did it work?

Also if you could go onto my profile, and have a look at the timmy links. I have two potential Timmy's and I need help deciding which picture is better, so take a look. (yes I'm having second thoughts from what I previously decided!)