CHAPTER 6 / Lust

February 12th, 2010

Dear Yukari,

I knew that I should have never stayed quiet with my thoughts about Ikutsuki. I'm sure you would have heard me out, even if you wouldn't have believed me at first. Everything he did seem to be exaggerated, as if he had been acting the whole time. His information always came when it was convenient. In the end it was actually easy for him to deceive all of us. I mean, who would actually want the Fall to happen?

The Fall was being called by unconscious thought, and that isn't something you can really fight. But to actively seek it in some sort of belief that it would lead to salvation? What would have happened then? There was nothing to be gained by letting it happen. All of us…no, all of humanity would have become just like the victims of Apathy Syndrome. Eventually we all would have died, but it would have been a slow and painful death. Then there would be Aigis…she would have been left all alone for eternity. And that thought horrified me.

Still there is a question as to how Mitsuru's Grandfather even learned about the Fall in the first place. It wasn't like Shadows and Personae were written about in some history book. So how could they have possibly figured out that Shadows could bring forth the Fall? Still in the end of it all they had succeeded. Even if it had taken them a decade for it to finally come to pass, and yet they had all died as a result.

I'm sure there are other secrets just as dark lying in the past of the Kirijo Group and I don't think Mitsuru knows about most of it. While this fight may be resolved, I'm sure there are many fights that will happen and continue to happen against the Shadows. More Persona users will be brought in to the fight…and maybe some of you will never stop fighting that battle. And I feel that Mitsuru will lead that charge, especially as she learns more about the Kirijo Group's dark past.

I wonder what your decision would be. I'm not sure if you would take up that kind of fight. Still I think maybe you would, after all it is because of Shadows that you lost your Father. And now you're going to lose me too. I wish there was something that I could leave behind…a way for you to move on with your life and maybe never have to summon your persona again. But that is just me wanting you to stay safe. The truth is I know that even if you decide to fight, you'd be just fine because I know how strong you really are. And I don't think there is any fight that you couldn't win for the right reasons.

Just remember whatever happens, I will always love you. And as long as I am able to as the Seal…I will always watch over you.

Love Always,

Arisato Minato

July 7th, 2009 / Dark Hour

He felt a hand dragging him along; somehow Minato was managing to walk without stumbling even though he felt so groggy. It was like being drugged, although he couldn't say he knew what that feeling was like. It was like when he had awoken to his persona…actually he took that back, this was nothing like it. He suddenly became more aware of the warmth in his hand. He hadn't really held anyone's hand before but this hand definitely belonged to a girl. It was smaller than his but was definitely more forceful than he thought it would be.

Minato felt a change in the air and the audible click of a door closing and locking. He still couldn't focus his eyes, and he didn't feel like he was in any danger. Still something felt off…no…something felt wrong about this situation. He was dragged further and then spun around. Suddenly caught off guard he was pushed down. He was momentarily dazed thinking he would hit the ground but found himself landing on a soft bed. Then he felt the other person straddle his lap and then bent down. Minato felt the warmth from her body slowly engulfing him as he attempted to force his eyes open. His eyes refused to open at that moment, as if something was keeping them shut.

His thoughts were unfocused; he tried to push whoever this was off of him. But hands gripped his wrist and pinned him to the bed. The other person finally spoke.

"I won't let you get away," the person said.

Minato couldn't tell who it was. It was like his ears weren't functioning properly. Why was he even here? He needed to stop this, he needed room to think.

All thoughts stopped when another pair of lips crashed against his. He fought it, trying to turn away from it but Minato couldn't fight it quite enough. Her lips were forceful, eager and yet soft, caring and overall turned him on in a way he had no way of fighting. Much to his partners delight she delved further into the kiss and soon it was like a door had been opened. Minato's defenses melted away under this attack and gave in fully to this kiss, and he eagerly kissed her back.

She let go of his wrist and directed his hands to her body, welcoming him to touch her. Even going as to direct his hands under her shirt so that he was touching her skin. Her light moan pushed him further. He was losing his thoughts with each passing moment. Nothing seemed to matter…only this. Only her.

Suddenly she stopped, "I want this to be perfect. Will you wait for me?" She asked coyly. Minato felt his vision slowly coming back.

"As long as you need me too," he found himself saying. Minato felt himself smile, but he was sure he hadn't actually wanted to do so…right? He didn't even know who he was with.

"Good," She bent down and kissed his neck right below his ear and then whispered. "Be right back, Mi-na-to." She emphasized each syllable in his name and then quickly disappeared, leaving him alone.

Minato felt pain in his head and slowly sat up on the side of the bed. His vision was starting to come back. Then he heard the sound of the shower turning on. That sound was what was making him more aware of his situation. But how the hell did he even get here? This was a hotel right? He had a reason for being here…didn't he?

Another sharp pain came to him and he quickly grabbed his head. Embrace your desire…

His desire? That was a complicated question, he wasn't sure if there was anything he truly desired. His life had often showed him that desire for anything was just a route to being let down. Yet ultimately you couldn't help but wish for something. Right now he had a goal…a…wait did he? Was there something that he wanted?

His head was racked with pain once more and he used both his hands to grab his head. I am the voice of your inner self. Enjoy the moment. That which cannot be felt is merely a dream. The present is all we have. That didn't seem right. While it may be true that enjoying the moment can have its virtue it should never be at the expense of the future or the way you feel. That was what he had always believed.

Once more his head was hit with pain. The future is but a fantasy, memory a fabrication. Let your desire free you from your shackles…such is my wish. My wish? No, that isn't what I wanted. I have things that I want to do and see, and blindly following my desires is not the way I can achieve them.

More pain hit him again. Minato knew he was being manipulated now. Something was interfering with his thoughts. Pleasure is what you truly want. You stand before the doorway to bliss. You cannot deny your instincts. Embrace your desire. Minato felt a compulsion to get to his feet. However he fought it and instead fell onto the bed as an overwhelming pain came to him. He screamed as the pain seemed to delve deeper into his very brain. Why do you resist? Don't avert your eyes from the truth… The voice brought more pain to him and he let out another agonizing scream.

His senses shut down as his mind was fraught with overwhelming pain. Something was in his head, crawling around trying to get him to do something that wasn't him. He thrashed around on the bed until something physically stopped him. Someone jumped on top of him and brought his head to their chest.

"Minato! It's okay! Everything is okay," a soothing voice told him.

The pain eased and then after a moment it completely disappeared. His whole body eases and his breath eased and he took in a few deep breaths but he kept his eyes clothes. She was warm…and incredibly wet. She must have rushed straight out of the shower so Minato decided he would keep his eyes closed. He said nothing and instead tried to refocus his thoughts. Now he could remember everything. They had defeated Hierophant and had been trapped in that room. Then that was when they had noticed the large mirror seemed out of place. When he touched the mirror a blinding light had come out. It had caused a more basic desire to surface. Or maybe it was a magnification of pent up sexual tension? Either way, lust had been what affected all of them. Amplified by the Shadow that had made the trap.

He had switched his persona to Narcissus as a knee jerk reaction and maybe that was why he had been affected differently. His resistance had caused him physical pain. But he hadn't been able to fully resist it.

That scent, he knew it instinctively. It was Yukari. So she had been the one that had dragged him to this room. Had pushed him on to the bed and then they…had kissed. Not just any simple kiss, but one with passion, desire and a hunger. Minato was angry beyond what he could express. It had been his first kiss, and it had been because of the manipulation by a Shadow. Yukari had also been a victim.

"I'm okay now," he finally said. "Please go take care of yourself now."

"Right," She quickly let go and he felt as she got up and moved. "Did you see anything?"

"No, nothing at all," He said trying to ease her. He wasn't sure what the state of her undress was but based on what he had felt, she at the very least had a towel on.

The door to the bathroom closed and he fell back onto the bed. While the pain was gone he felt sluggish and drained on many levels. Still his anger was staying close to the surface. He had been manipulated…as was Yukari. He could care less what happened to him. He could deal with that, but to bring in someone else like Yukari and create a situation like this…

A moment later the door from the bathroom opened. Minato just stared up at the ceiling trying to calm his nerves. The next moment a familiar voice came to him.

"I can finally reach you! Can you two hear me?" Fuuka's telepathic voice was somewhat of a comfort to hear.

"We hear you," Yukari answered as she sat on the bed next to him.

"I'm sorry I couldn't contact you sooner. The Shadow was interfering with your thoughts. And you all got separated. The enemy is still in the same room as before. Please regroup and hurry there. Did you hear that Minato?" Fuuka asked prompting for me to reply this time.

"Uh…sorry. Yeah I hear you," Minato groaned, finding it harder to talk than he thought it would. Despite the pain being gone it had definitely given him some side effects.

"Um…did something happen?" Fuuka asked. A legitimate question considering how he had answered.

"No…Nothing happened," Minato tried his best to sound more believable. Fuuka said nothing else and Minato found himself staring at the ceiling once more.

"You say that but can you sit up?" Yukari asked from next to him quieter than she had been before.

He closed his eyes and sat up, managing to only let out a small grunt as he did so. He used his hands to steady himself and slowly opened his eyes. His vision cleared up quicker than before and looked over to Yukari who had gotten dressed again and dried her hair. It would be hard to hide that it had been washed. "My head is still a mess." He admitted.

"Arisato your shirt is um…" she said blushing a bit and looking away. He looked down and noticed that his shirt was unbuttoned and pulled out. He'd been like this the whole time?

His memory was hazy…did Yukari do this while they had been kissing? Under the influence of the Shadow…of course it had happened. Yukari had even gone into the shower to prepare herself. What if he hadn't fought? If he gave in to it…they would be doing something that he would no doubt regret. He shakily got to his feet and buttoned up his shirt. He tucked it back in not really minding that Yukari was there with him. They had already been forced into a situation against their wills. "Sorry Takeba. For what happened."

"Neither one of us was at fault," she said softly. Minato noticed as she brought her right hand up to her lips. "But we…"

"Yeah," Minato breathed. It was definitely awkward. Actually if he had to guess they were both incredibly aware of the other at this point in time.

"Forget about that, are you okay?" Yukari asked.

"I think so. The more I fought it the harder it tried to make me give in. Some voice kept trying to get me to give in and…I could never do that," he shook his head and let out a long sigh. "I'm glad you were able to break from its influence."

She said nothing to that and put a hand up to his head. "Well, you feel alright. Are you going to be okay to fight?"

"I can deal with it," He said. Minato took a few steps to the door and noticed their weapons next to the door. He grabbed them and turned back to hand Yukari her bow and arrows. Minato put his sheath back onto his belt. He heard the noise of an evoker and he saw Yukari's persona appear and felt a gentle warmth come over him.

"Just making sure," Yukari said stepping forward and putting her evoker in its holster. "We should probably hurry up and find the others."

"Yamagishi doesn't seem like she was aware of what happened to any of us…so let's just keep it to ourselves. No one needs to know," Minato spoke softly. "And I want you to know that I would never…"

"Minato-kun, shut up," Yukari interrupted him; she was blushing at just the thought of what had happened. Clearly she just wanted to forget about it. "I know that already."

"Then let's go teach this Shadow that it messed with the wrong people," Minato said as he opened the door and the two of them stepped out. The room emptied out in front of the stairs. He was confused for a moment; he had no memory of actually going down the stairs. The capabilities of manipulation from this shadow were absolutely frightening to think about.

"I'm sorry," Fuuka's voice said. Her telepathy was still hard to get used to even after all the times she had been with them to Tartarus. "I never expected there would be another shadow. Its power is blanketing the whole building. I'm pretty sure it's in the room where you fought the other one. But it somehow sealed the door. I'll try to find a way to break the seal. In the meantime you should regroup with the others. They are up on the next floor."

"Alright, thanks Yamagishi," Minato said and moved to the stairs. He felt a lot better the more he moved around. Heading up the stairs it didn't take long to actually meet up with Akihiko and Mitsuru. More than likely the two of them would have had a similar experience to them, so he needed to avoid making it any more awkward than it might get. "You alright, senpai?"

"W-we're fine. Nothing happened," Mitsuru quickly said. Obviously something had but being that defensive so quickly was a little much.

"Didn't think there would be two shadows. Anyway, you guys okay?" Akihiko seemed to be able to act more natural than Mitsuru at least.

"Yeah, we're fine," Minato brushed it off. Before Yukari felt the need to elaborate he brought the focus back to business. "Yamagishi, any luck on figuring out that seal?"

"It's the mirrors! They're giving off the same energy as the Shadow. Maybe the seal will vanish if you break them," Fuuka informed the group.

"Alright so we just need to break some mirrors until the seal breaks right?" Akihiko grinned.

"I don't think blindly smashing mirrors is the right approach. After all the damage will reflect in the real world," Mitsuru's composure was back in place and back to business. Minato was glad it hadn't taken much for that to happen. "What do you think, Arisato?"

"Well, I seriously doubt that every mirror is in connection to the seal, so we need to find the ones that do something different. Let's search the rooms on this floor and then meet back here. Takeba and I will start with these rooms over here." Minato pointed behind them along the left side of the hall.

"Good idea lets inspect the mirrors and see if we find anything out of place. Let's hurry, Akihiko," Mitsuru quickly moved off into the first room.

Minato turned and entered the first door. Yukari staying close to him. Soon they were searching room after room looking for differences in the mirrors. So far there hadn't been much luck. Until they reached the last one in the hall. Approaching the mirror it was incredibly obvious that something was missing. There was no reflection of them. It just showed the room, but not them.

"This is definitely it. I get an odd feeling from it, just like that one we saw up on the third floor," Yukari confirmed his suspicion. Pulling out his sword and unsheathing it he spun and stabbed the mirror and causing it to shatter.

"That was it! The seal has gotten weaker. There is probably a couple more to find," Fuuka said.

"Let our senpai know to look for mirrors that don't cast a reflection and to take those ones out," Minato said and Fuuka gave and okay. He sighed, "Okay let's head up and search the other rooms on the third floor then."

"You look so tired," Yukari commented.

"It just means I'll sleep really well tonight," Minato faked a smile before turning and heading out the door and towards the stairs to head to the top floor. At this point he just wanted the night to be over. Too much had happened. He was physically and emotionally drained. He hadn't expected to be mentally attacked like that. None of them had. It was amazing that nothing worse had happened. Something that could not be taken back. And the mere thought that he could have been responsible for something like that infuriated him.

A few rooms in and they had found another of the mirrors. This time Yukari took the honors and smashed the mirror with an arrow. After a moment more Fuuka's voice was heard.

"The seal is broken! Everyone please regroup on the third floor," Fuuka spoke to everyone at once.

Minato and Yukari were there first, but only a minute passed before Akihiko and Mitsuru appeared as well. "Is everyone ready?"

"Tch, he's not gonna know what hit him," Akihiko said a little too eagerly.

"Be careful, this shadow is responsible for the mind manipulation. No doubt he'll use some sort of underhand tactic on us during the fight," Minato said reaching out to the door and then quickly entered the room with the others behind him.

It was obvious this Shadow was that of the Lovers arcana. A large heart floated in the air with strange looking wings. How it kept it in the air was anyone's guess. The heart itself was see through and was rimmed with gold decorating and something that resembled a crown on the top of it. The shadows mask seemed to glare at them, clearly disappointed that all of them had broken free from its illusions.

"Because of you…I had to come to this disgusting place. Now you're going to pay!" Yukari yelled pulling out her evoker and fired off her wind spell causing the shadow to rear back. But clearly it had not put much of a dent in it. Minato rushed forward along with Akihiko. The Shadow twisted around swiping at them with one of the wings. Minato went into a slide but Akihiko jumped. Slamming his fist hard into the Shadow, Akihiko couldn't help but have a grin on his face. Meanwhile Minato slid under the shadow and turned just as the Shadow was being forced down. He switched his sword to his off hand as he pulled out his evoker. His persona switched to Hua Po, "Agilao!" He shouted as the fire caused the Shadow to writhe in pain.

It recovered quickly, knocking Akihiko back, but it left Minato trapped as it quickly turned and something he wasn't expecting happened. An arrow shot from it and pierced Minato right in the chest. He had no time what so ever to react or dodge. He felt it again…an overwhelming pain entered his head. His body was moving on its own. The Shadow turned back to the others as Minato helplessly moved in front of the Shadow facing the others.

His evoker went back to his head.

"Watch out! Minato is being manipulated by the enemy!" Fuuka let out an alarm to the others.

"Agilao…" Minato heard his own voice, but it was flat…lifeless. Hua Po appeared and launched the fire spell directly at Mitsuru. She hadn't been ready for it and it knocked her down to the ground. She was in pain. He felt a pain in his head again. He had to fight this. He needed to break free. But the grip on him was strong as if some invisible string directly attached him to the Shadow. His persona changed against his will. It was going to target Akihiko next who was quickly rushing to Mitsuru's side. "Fortuna. Bufu." His lifeless voice spoke once more and the spell aimed and hit Akihiko completely off guard. It sent him spiraling to the ground next to Mitsuru.

The Shadow was turning Minato to his next target. Yukari. He felt another immense pain as he fought with everything he had. He screamed out once more. Pain, agony and a desire to break free reverberated in his voice as his screams filled the room as the more he did the more pain was exerted into his mind. His persona was changed again. It was Taka-minakata, it would hit Yukari with a zio skill…zionga. He had to stop it. His voice screamed out again as he fought as hard as he could to keep the evoker away from his head.

Suddenly he was knocked to the ground. It was Akihiko, he managed to recover quickly and heal Mitsuru. Luckily Minato didn't have a persona with an upgraded version of bufu or else he might have taken longer. Still Minato fought to get control of himself. "Takeba, take care of Arisato," Mitsuru quickly ordered. "Make sure to watch out for his arrows, that is what took control of Arisato."

Yukari scrambled over to Minato and pinned his arms down and found herself straddled over him as Akihiko moved to join the fight once more. He screamed again as more pain came over him. Yukari looked conflicted about what she should do with Minato in so much pain. He was fighting it. And the Shadow wasn't happy about it. As Mitsuru and Akihiko continued to fight the Shadow, Minato had hoped it would loosen its control. However another sharp pain went through him and he released another peircing scream of pain.

"I have you, Minato-kun," Yukari suddenly said softly. "I know you can fight this."

Something happened. Suddenly there was a disconnect and then a quick stabbing pain in Minato's head. Regaining control he looked over to the Shadow and both Akihiko and Mitsuru had managed to knock it down but they were hurting. He looked back to Yukari, "Its control is gone. Hurry Takeba, we have to help."

She quickly got to her feet and helped Minato up. She brought up her evoker as Minato charged back into the fight. "Garu!" Yukari yelled from behind him. It sent the Shadow reeling back again stopping its attempt to get back up. Akihiko turned and saw Minato charging in. He grinned and brought his own evoker up to his head.

Turning back to the enemy, Akihiko fired his evoker, "Rakunda!" Something wrapped around the shadow. Mitsuru quickly followed it up as the Shadow once more was trying to recover. Her evoker fired, "Bufu!" The ice cause the Shadow to fall back again.

Minato jumped up into the air towards the specific place he wanted to strike. The Shadow desperately fired another arrow but with no time to aim or adjust itself from its position it harmlessly struck against the ceiling, missing Minato by a long shot. His persona switched to Ares. His fury all came into this one crippling blow backed by the strength of his persona. His sword pierced straight into the mask and the shadow screamed is indecipherable scream. He put his evoker to his head. "Getsu-ei!" Ares appeared and struck down onto Minato's sword driving it completely the rest of the way through the Shadow. The Shadow stopped struggling and then suddenly disappeared.

He fell backwards only to be caught by Akihiko and Mitsuru. "You alright, Arisato?"

He merely nodded his head and took a few steps away from his senpai. "Thanks."

"Let's get out of here," Akihiko finally said.

Yukari moved up to Minato and the two of them quietly walked out some distance behind their two senpai. The night had been long and it was finally over. He usually didn't come out of the full moon battle without some sort of damage, and physically he was mostly unharmed. But mentally…he had been wracked with more pain than he had ever felt before, and it wasn't something he was going to forget any time soon. How much had he screamed in there? And the look on Yukari's face told him that she was worried about him.

The problem was he had no idea what he should say to her, so instead he opted to put his earphones in, even though they didn't work in the dark hour. It still was a little bit comforting. Yukari seemed to smile a bit at this and relax.

It wasn't long until they were standing outside of the hotel where Fuuka and Junpei we're waiting.

"I'm glad you're all safe," Fuuka welcomed them with a smile.

"Thanks for your help. The enemy was sly, but you did well," Mitsuru gave a smile of her own.

"I did what I could," Fuuka said.

Mitsuru turned around back to Minato, "And you too, for withstanding the enemy's mental assault."

Minato simply nodded, not caring to comment on how much damage that mental assault had done to him. And how it could have been a lot worse. This whole night could have been his last one. It almost had been.

"Alright, let's call it a night," Akihiko interrupted. He walked off with Mitsuru not far behind. Minato thanked Akihiko silently for finally making the night officially over.

"Oh, Yukari. About that thing you mentioned the other day…" Fuuka said suddenly. Minato knew better than to pry so he started to walk off as well. He didn't hear the exchange until Junpei was suddenly speaking and apparently at Minato.

"So, you're the hero again, huh?" Junpei's tone made his feelings obvious. Minato could care less about what Junpei thought in that regard. If he could hand off his power to someone else then he would do it in a heartbeat.

"I just did what I could. It doesn't matter," Minato muttered, his voice not even that loud considering how drained he was.

"Yeah, whatever. Who cares anyway?" Junpei irritated took a few steps.

"Hey, why do you have to be like that? Don't tell me you're jealous…" Yukari was obviously trying to quickly defuse the situation.

"Shut up," Junpei said quickly and then walked off.

"What's up his butt?" Yukari wasn't happy with his attitude.

"Forget about it," Minato held his head for a moment feeling a dizzy spell.

"You okay?" Fuuka asked.

"No, I don't think so," Minato said as he started to walk. "The faster we get back to the dorm, the better."

Even though he didn't see it, he was sure that Yukari kept her eyes on him the entire way back to the dorm. Making sure that he didn't fall or show any signs of pain. Minato did his best to appear just fine all the way back to the dorm. Once they arrived back at the dorm and the Dark Hour had finally ended he turned on his mp3 player and lost himself in his music. Despite his earlier statement he was sure that sleep would not come easy for him. Not with the thought of what he had almost done.

Forced to turn on his friends…and it could have gone worse…he could have killed them. The thought stayed in his mind…and would for many nights to come.

March 9th, 2011 / Early Morning

How could she ever have forgotten that night? Minato had been angry at first…but then the mental assault by the shadow had affected him in a more direct way than anyone else. Her anger had been pretty high at that time. After all being manipulated she had shared her first kiss with Minato. But to find out it had been his first kiss as well…somehow it made her happy. Even though it had been under the most horrible of circumstances. The compulsion had been so strong at that time.

She remembered the feeling, grabbing Minato's hand and having an intense lust and desire come over her. She needed to have him, desired to have all of him. Willing to give every single part of her to him. She pulled him down the stairs and to that hotel room. She dumped their weapons on the ground and locked the door. Yukari turned back to him and could remember fumbling with his shirt as she pushed him back to the bed and down onto it. She straddled him and then that was when she bent down and kissed him. That contact had sent shivers through her body and her desire for him had intensified. She had lost herself in the feeling and ecstasy of his lips on hers.

Hungering for more she moved her hands to his shirt and began to unbutton it from top to bottom. Pulling it open she had ran her hands over his bare chest and felt absolutely amazing. Then she had made the decision in her mind. There in that hotel room she would become one with Minato. Then her voice said some words…and she couldn't remember them until she had read the journal. It was the first of two times she would speak his first name without honorifics that night. As if she had claimed him for herself already. But that hadn't been her, not completely. It would have been a lie to say that she hadn't been attracted to him before then, but she had been nowhere near close to ever doing something like that. Not at that point in time.

What happened next scared her. She had been in the shower, readying herself to have sex. And it was while she was in there that she had come to her senses. Not because of some internal fight or something like that. No, but because of the horrifying scream that Minato had let loose. She was still haunted by that scream sometimes. The pain he had felt had to be on a different level entirely.

Quickly she had grabbed a towel and wrapped herself. Not giving a second thought to decency or anything else. She rushed out of that room and called his name once again. Yukari scrambled to him and did the only thing she could think to do. She held him. She held him tightly like if she didn't he would somehow slip through her grasp. She whispered comforting words and repeated them over and over. Yukari knew she had, and at the same time wondering if the Shadow was killing him. What if it had been able to destroy his mind in some way? That had been the thoughts running through her head.

She wasn't sure how long it had taken for Minato to finally regain himself and calm down, but she didn't want to release him. Thankfully he had been okay after all. Sure she was embarrassed by her state of undress and the events that had transpired but she had never been angry at Minato. Clearly he had been fighting it the whole time.

Her real regret was that she had not been in control of her body for her first kiss. But she did not regret it being with Minato.

A knock came on her door. Yukari crossed her room and open the door. Mitsuru was standing there. "Oh come on in," Yukari said and motioned her in.

"Thank you," Mitsuru said as she entered and crossed to the chair that led to the small balcony of her room. "I realized you probably wouldn't read what had happened for the rest of that night. After all only the ones who went in knew exactly what the shadows mental assault had entailed. It even went as far as to block out Yamagishi. But if you want to talk to someone about what happened…well I can listen."

Yukari closed her eyes and hugged the journal to her chest. "That fight scared me. You remember the way he screamed in the last fight?"

"Yes, when it had been controlling him. He fought its control to the point of causing pain to himself," Mitsuru said talking softly.

"Well when I was alone with him…when he was starting to gain control, he had been screaming then too. And actually that was what had brought me to my senses. I…" Yukari felt herself shake a bit. "I had given in to it. I was so far deep into its control, but his screams…" She shook her head as she could hear that very thing in her head as the memory was still fresh in her mind. "It terrified me. I thought he was dying. He was dying in front of me and I didn't know what to do."

"Why was his experience so different than ours?" Mitsuru asked softly to no one.

"I think because it was targeting him. All of the Shadows were," Yukari was confident that she was right. "At the end of every fight against those twelve…he always got the worst of it, one way or another."

"You're right," Mitsuru nodded. "It makes sense in hindsight of course."

"None of us knew what he was going through. Not really anyway," Yukari sighed. "The more I read, the more I realize how much I didn't know."

"He held so much back from all of us, but he wasn't accustomed to trusting anyone. I think he did what he thought was best based on what he knew." Mitsuru said.

"I know. But even after he and I started dating, I had hoped he would open up to me more. Yet I know he kept it all in. I was too busy with my own issues. He helped me patch things up with my Mom. I never thought that would happen but he was there for me and encouraged me all the way. And I know it's because it was important to him. He wanted me to realize that I wasn't the only one that suffered when my Dad died and that my Mother dealt with it in her own way. But it hadn't been the best way. Mom broke down and begged for me to see her. She realized what she had done…so Minato pushed me to go with it and do my best to fix the relationship." Yukari sat down on her bed. "I brought him with me when I met with her. He was so charming. Mom told me I had a much better eye in men then she had. It had been…a lot of fun to be able to talk with my Mom like that. Just like that Minato had been welcomed into my life and I had made my decision then."

Yukari could not help the tears that formed. "I knew I loved him. I loved him so much. He cared so much for me, but never once did he ask anything from me. But here I had started to depend on him so much. I even started to get jealous whenever he was hanging out with anyone else. It didn't even matter who it was. I just wanted to hog him all to myself. I mean how selfish is that? I was a horrible girlfriend. I never helped him…I never…"

"You're wrong, Yukari." Mitsuru said suddenly. "You were always there for him when he needed support, even before the two of you started dating. I don't think you give yourself enough credit. I'm sure Arisato thinks the same."

Yukari nodded. Mitsuru was probably right. After all he had loved her, and had spent many occasions to go out of his way just to tell her that fact. Still, the real thing she meant was that she felt she didn't do enough for her significant other. Like she had always taken but never given anything back. This journal brought a magnifying glass to a time that she was still somewhat foggy about. As she read the memories were reforming and solidifying in her mind. Eventually when she finished she would remember it all…maybe then the guilt she felt would lessen. But the pain would probably become even worse the further she approached the end of the journal.

She found herself sighing once again. "You know on the night of the full moon, I had given in so far that I would have given Minato all of me before the two of us had even known each other. I would have hated if that had happened, not because of being with Minato but because I had no control over my own body. Regardless we shared our first kiss in that hotel during the dark hour. Yet I doubt anyone could say their first kiss had been so…intense."

"The way that Shadow manipulated our lust I have to wonder about how it was able to do so…" Mitsuru commented.

"I do to. I mean, maybe there had to be a desire for it to begin with. Which I would have never admitted then that I had been somewhat attracted to him. I'm pretty sure I made it up to him later though," Yukari smiled. "I thought for sure that the Shadow had made me do something I would have never done myself, but it wasn't true at all. I realized that not too much later."

"You're started to get to the harder parts of his journal now," Mitsuru commented as she got to her feet. "I realize there is only three more days on this trip, but I'll be in town for some time if you need someone to talk to."

"Thank you Mitsuru. We should head down for breakfast," Yukari said getting up to her feet. "After breakfast I think I'll read some more for everyone. I think everyone should know what was going on through his mind when Ikutsuki was around."

"Yes, it seems his intuition about that man had been sharper than the rest of us. Yet he doubted himself because he felt he was the only one that saw it," Mitsuru shook her head. "There is so much I regret not being able to do for him. Especially as his senpai."

"I don't think that is why he wrote this, Mitsuru. In the end I think he wanted us to know just how much he cared and loved all of us," Yukari smiled but it quickly faded. "But I know how you feel."

"I think you understand it more than I ever could, Yukari."

July 11th, 2009 / Evening

Mitsuru was busy giving the chairman a full debriefing about how the full moon had gone. Meanwhile Minato was leaning against the computer looking at the group. He was standing behind Yukari, and he had noticed that she had come in to this meeting with one of determination. Minato was unsure on what exactly was going to happen, but he wasn't happy about it either. Yukari had been way too secretive lately, but then again he didn't have a right to ask about it.

It felt like the more he was involved with this group the further he drifted away from them. Then again he was sure if it hadn't been for Persona's and the Dark Hour he would have never known any of them. Except maybe Junpei as he had greeted him before he had even become involved in SEES. Yukari probably would have only talked to him when required by the class or whatever.

He turned on his mp3 player but it was at a comfortable volume so that he could hear all of them.

"I see. They're getting tougher. But it's not all bad news. I called today's meeting because…" Ikutsuki started but Yukari was quick to cut him off.

"I'm sorry. Before we go on, I'd like to ask Mitsuru-senpai something." Yukari didn't waste words.

Mitsuru looked completely perplexed on what this could be about. Minato was curious as well; especially over something that Yukari obviously felt she had to keep to herself until now.

"Since I joined, so many things have happened. I went along with it without really understanding what was going on. But now, I need to know. I'm going to ask straight out. You've been hiding something from us, haven't you, senpai? You act like you don't know anything about the Dark Hour and Tartarus. But they're related to that accident ten years ago, aren't they?"

Minato pulled the earphones from his ears. Ten years ago? That was when my parents…

"What accident?" Junpei asked.

"There was an explosion near our school, and a lot of people died. It must have been big news back then. You know about it, don't you?" Yukari had moved into a full accusation. Minato did not like where this was going but he had no right to interfere.

As much as Minato did not want to think about things that had happened ten years ago, this was obviously knowledge he didn't have. And he would be an idiot not to learn all he could despite his desire to jump in and stop it.

Mitsuru gave a soft reply affirming what Yukari had said. Clearly Mitsuru was not comfortable with the mention of those events as well. But Yukari was not going to be stopped.

"Luckily, no students were injured. But around the same time, a large number of students were recorded as absent. Seems like more than just coincidence," Yukari was angry. Minato could understand being angry about being left in the dark.

"What do you mean?" Mitsuru asked, clearly not her usual confident self.

"I dug up some old school records, and found something interesting. The students who were absent…They all collapsed suddenly, and had to be hospitalized. Sound familiar? You know, like the girls who bullied Fuuka," Yukari paused but when Mitsuru said nothing she pressed forward. "There has to be an explanation. What really happened on the day of that accident? The Kirijo group built our school, so you must know something. Tell me the truth!"

Minato imagined that Yukari was shooting Mitsuru the most intense stare she could. Mitsuru finally did speak after a moment, "I wasn't trying to hide anything from you. It just never seemed relevant. But…"

"It's okay. It's not your fault," Ikutsuki said and somehow eased Mitsuru a bit. Minato didn't like that. Clearly Mitsuru trusted the chairman.

"Alright. I'll tell you the whole story. The shadows have many mysterious abilities. Some research indicates that they can affect time and space. We think of them as our enemies, but what if we could somehow use them to our advantage? They would be a source of unimaginable power, wouldn't they?" Everyone seemed shocked by that statement. Mitsuru continued, "Fourteen years ago, one man pursued this line of thinking. He was the former leader of the Kirijo Group, Kouetsu Kirijo…My grandfather."

Mitsuru closed her eyes for a moment before she continued, "My grandfather became obsessed with Shadows. He wanted to harness their power, and create something extraordinary."

"Harness their power?" Fuuka repeated. All of this was probably hard to swallow for them. Minato walked over to the window and looked outside. While night was settling in, the city was lit up, easy to see the tall buildings on the island they went to each day for school.

"He assembled a team of scientist, and over several years collected a significant amount of Shadows," Mitsuru must have looked over to Minato because it felt like her eyes had moved to him for a moment.

"He what? Damn, that's freaking crazy," Junpei probably had more choice words to say but had toned it down.

"However, ten years ago, during the final stages of the experiment, they lost control of the Shadows' power. Consequently, the nature of the world was altered," Mitsuru spoke concisely.

"You mean…" Fuuka was quickly cut off by Mitsuru.

"Yes. Tartarus and the dark hour," Mitsuru paused for a moment before resuming. "By their account, the mass of Shadows they collected split into several larger ones that then dispersed. These are the Shadows we've been encountering on nights of the full moon."

"Is that why they appear in different places?" Fuuka asked. Minato highly doubted that. More than likely the Shadows were actually nowhere near each other. It was just that something was drawing them back, one by one. Whatever force was that was drawing them back…that was the thing they needed to be worried about. Probably more so than these other large shadows.

"Wait a minute, if what you said is true, then why did our school turn into Tartarus?" Yukari suddenly gasped as a realization hit her. "Don't tell me…that's where they conducted the experiment?"

"Yes," Mitsuru gave a slow nod. "I'm afraid it's just as you're thinking. Port Island must have been an ideal location for them. It was a highly-populated area, and the Kirijo Group had influence there. They could do as they pleased…As you guessed; the experiment ten years ago was conducted at Gekkoukan High School."

"Does that mean…all we've been doing is cleaning up their mess? You lied to us?" Yukari was angry and maybe she was right to be. But why was she so personally invested in something that happened ten years ago? Regardless of the circumstances they couldn't just ignore the Shadows. Still I wonder if they had lost control or not…perhaps this had been the desired outcome and they just hadn't anticipated the explosion that occurred. Either way, it was a mistake to gather so many Shadows together.

Meanwhile Yukari had shifted her attack to Akihiko as well. "You knew too, didn't you senpai? They've been using us! Or, do you not care as long as you get to fight?"

"That's not true, I have my reasons," Akihiko said looking away.

"Think what you like. It was my decision not to share that information. I'm sorry. I never intended to deceive you. Convincing you to join SEES was my highest priority. As absurd as it may seem, only we…with our Personas…can fight the Shadows." Mitsuru stated the simple truth. And Minato knew it. Still Yukari was angry.

"How could you?" Yukari's voice full of venom and spite.

"Besides…some of us were never given a choice," Mitsuru added.

"Mitsuru…don't." Akihiko said pleadingly from next to her.

"Enough of this," Minato finally said strolling over to the group. "Bitch about it all you want but none of this changes a damn thing! Pointing fingers is useless. All we can do is deal with what we can. Kirijo-san was just a kid then. So were the rest of us! None of us on SEES are to blame for what happened or the birth of the Dark Hour."

"Arisato…" Mitsuru seemed surprise, probably about Minato swearing but basically how he was trying to defuse the situation.

"He's right. Yukari…It's those in the past that are to blame. And they lost their lives as a result of what they did. We're all in the same boat here. None of us deserve the burden that has been thrust upon us," Ikutsuki finally joined the conversation, and Minato wasn't sure how he felt being backed up by him.

"But…" Yukari didn't want to leave it as it was. Minato understood that, but all this was…was an issue of trust. There was a divide getting bigger all the time on the SEES team.

"It's been ten years since the incident…No one knows why the Shadows suddenly returned. But, since their active, at least we can find and destroy them. Do you realize what this means?" Ikutsuki smiled big as he looked at the members of SEES. "What if I told you that those twelve shadows were the cause of everything?"

Alarms went off in Minato's head as soon as those words came from Ikutsuki's said it. It was a thought the most of the SEES team had already been entertaining ever since he had pointed out that there was only eight left…well six now. How could he possibly know that?

"Then, if we defeat them all, Tartarus and the Dark Hour will disappear?" Akihiko spoke first.

"Exactly! That's what I was going to tell you earlier. See, its good news, isn't it?" Ikutsuki had certainly grabbed all of their attention and defused the situation.

"Is that true?" Fuuka questioned it.

The chairman nodded, "There's evidence to support it. Now, our true battle begins."

Everyone was quiet, and Minato had moved back over to the window at this point. He had no intention in hearing the rest of his dribble. What evidence? Minato severely doubted he would ever procure that under the guise that it was top secret stuff within the Kirijo Group or something along those lines. Minato had severe doubts about all this. Just like he had thought of before…nothing was that simple. But he had no reasoning behind his doubts. No way of disproving anything. Not that Ikutsuki was presenting them with any evidence as to why he believed he was right. Still if he could just gather some evidence or something to disprove it…that would be the wisest course of action.

Without regard to the rest of the group he turned and headed out the door of the conference room. He knew that neither Mitsuru or Akihiko felt like they could give any orders after what had been revealed tonight. He moved down the stairs going further down until reaching the ground floor and down to the lobby.

"Wait!" said a familiar voice. It was Yukari. "Where are you going?"

"Out," Minato said simply as he turned to the front door and opened it. He was welcomed by the cool outdoor air. And he started walking down the street. Noticing a moment later that Yukari was walking next to him. "Why are you here?"

"Why are you so pissed?" Yukari asked point blank. "Is it because I confronted Mitsuru-senpai?"

"Maybe, I don't know. Did you ever consider what maybe Kirijo-san had to go through? Yes, I agree that her not sharing that information was a mistake on her part, but more than likely it's because it's something she doesn't like to remember. My guess is her awakening to her persona was not a happy one, especially for her Father." Minato sighed. He calmed his nerves down a bit.

"I don't think I was wrong with what I did," Yukari defended herself.

"No, but I think you approached it wrong. There was no reason for you to turn it into a personal attack against her. You should know that none of us are here because we want to be," Minato took a few steps.

"Why are you defending her? They are using us as their personal cleanup crew," Yukari said angrily.

Minato didn't look back, "Do you know when my parents died?"

"What?" Yukari was suddenly taken aback by this question. "Wasn't it…"

"That's right ten years ago," Minato turned around. "Guess where exactly they died. Go ahead guess!"

The anger from him had Yukari shrink back. "I don't know."

"On the moonlight bridge, the very same day as the explosion that happened. Now tell me, does that make me involved in this to?" Minato growled wanting to vent out his frustration. "My parents could have been a part of this whole thing. Or maybe they were killed by the Shadows that were released that night. I have no idea. And I never will."

"Minato-kun, I'm…"

"Don't say you're sorry. But shouldn't you think about this all more carefully? You know what; forget all the shit I just said. I'm not in any state to be giving out advice or lectures. I'm…" he let out a long sigh this time which eased a bit of his tension. "I'm just worried about everyone."

"Even after everything we learned tonight?" Yukari asked, but her voice much softer than it had been before.

"We learned that Kirijo-san has to pay for her Grandfathers foolish mistakes, and so she is in a difficult position. And Sanada-san probably has his own painful memories that he is holding back too. Just like you do, and me. Yukari-san, we all have our reasons, all I'm asking is that you remember that. All of us are the only allies we have in the fight against the Shadows. And regardless, the fact that we are the only ones able to fight them is something we can't ignore, no matter who is ultimately at fault," Minato turned to Yukari and stopped walking. "I understand why you want to know the truth. I do too. Just remember one thing."

"What's that, Minato-kun?" she asked, the fire from her earlier persistence was gone. Instead it was replaced with a look of introspection.

"That often the truth is not what we want. And we are far from learning the whole truth. There is still too much we don't know. But if this is the path you are set on. It will be long, it will be painful and it sure as shit, won't be easy." Minato said as he turned and started walking again.

Yukari walked beside him as he headed off to the Iwatodai station. Since he was out he might as well head to the mall and waste some excess energy there. Though it might feel a little odd to have Yukari with him, he wasn't about to turn her away. She needed the night air as much as he did. Both of them were angry for different reasons. Yukari had found out some important information. He only wishes it had gone better and not seemed like an attack on Mitsuru. But Minato couldn't settle the unease he had, and he sure the source of it was Ikutsuki.

"You know Minato-kun. I didn't know you swore," Yukari teased. Obviously she was trying to lighten the mood and Minato was glad to take it.

"Do you like it?" He raised an eyebrow at her.

"Not really," she smiled.

"Then I'll do my best to limit my swearing to when I'm really pissed."

March 9th, 2011 / Morning

"For some reason I always thought that Minato was a guy that was never fazed by anything. But it's like I've forgotten all the things that happened," Junpei shook his head. "Boy was I wrong."

"I think it's because all of us have only remembered the overall of what had happened, but not in the specifics of how we got there. I remember that Yukari confronted us about the past, and what had been discussed, but I had completely forgotten about Minato suddenly storming out or that Yukari had gone out after him," Mitsuru said solemnly.

"Maybe it was because of the time we spent in the Abyss of Time. We may have learned what happened to Minato but, it might have skewed our memories of the past, like it was all just glossed over," Akihiko suggested.

"Perhaps it was our united wish to move forward that created it? If we didn't remember all the pain he went through then it would be easier for us to move forward," Aigis added looking down to the ground as she said it.

"The Abyss of Time…it was a place created by our unwillingness to accept what had happened to him. Our thoughts even created a shade of him that we eventually had to fight. And probably the hardest fight we ever had," Yukari let out a long sigh. "I remember Minato saying once that emotions are a big importance when it comes to our Personas. I think it's possible that we all just wanted to remember the good times we had with him. Then maybe it would make us feel better about him being trapped in that seal. So we wouldn't have to wonder about how lonely he is there. How lonely those last moments he had really were."

"He alone shouldered the responsibility of protecting the world from destruction. I think he understood what all of it could mean. But as such I think it is our responsibility to know about the life of…the one who gave everything to us," Mitsuru spoke what all of them had been thinking.

"He was forced into this position from the beginning. His parents died as a result of that awful experiment. And then I did the unimaginable and sealed death inside of him. It was my only option, and back then I had no idea about what I had condemned this child to be a part of. It was my last desperate act to stop Death," Aigis kept her eyes away from the others. "I did this…"

"Aigis, you know better than anyone that he never blamed you," Yukari was on her feet. "He never blamed anyone or even himself. We owe it to ourselves to learn all we can about him. About how someone who had such horrible things happen to him would go into such a decision with so few regrets."

"So maybe we should talk about what we did know about him," Ken suggested.

"We knew that his parents had died on moonlight bridge as a result of the battle with Death and Aigis. What we don't know is why his parents were on Port Island to begin with," Mitsuru looked at the others. "Do you think it is possible that his parents were involved as well?"

Everyone seemed uncomfortable with that thought. As far as they knew only Yukari's Father had been the one to go against the Kirijo Group and did what he thought was necessary. But in reality could a lone scientist have succeeded in doing so?

"Now that I think about it, we only have a vague idea of what really happened ten years ago," Junpei looked thoughtful. "Maybe Yuki-tan's Father had warned some people on what he would do."

"My Father? But if that's true…" Yukari felt her knees go weak by the mere thought of the possibility.

"Yes, if that is true then it could very well be possible that your Father knew Arisato's parents. Possibly you did to. But considering you would have been six at the time…" Mitsuru said.

"That would be why I wouldn't remember," Yukari breathed. "Is there a possibility we can find out who was staffed by the Kirijo Group at that time?"

"I believe so. Yamagishi, can I ask for your help?" Mitsuru turned her gaze to one who had been relatively quiet durring this discussion.

"Of course. I'll do whatever I can to help," Fuuka got to her feet.

"Alright then, Yamagishi and I will find out what we can. Hopefully we'll have something to report by lunch time," Mitsuru and Fuuka then walked off.

"Sounds like we might have come across a major mystery," Akihiko seemed amused. "I wonder if we can find out how he did in his kendo clubs before he came to Gekkoukan."

"Did you see some of his matches before, senpai? I never went to go see him," Junpei asked.

"He was our team's ace. There was only one person he couldn't beat, but it had been a tough fight. And honestly if he hadn't been dealing with Shadows and everything else I'm sure he would have been good enough to beat him. He made mistakes only because he was so used to fighting Shadows. Real fights are a lot different than a kendo match. However, his form was perfect, and defense top notch," Akihiko smiled looking back at his memories. "More time and training would have gotten him into college on a scholarship easily. As I recall there were several college kendo teams scoping out the hopefuls."

"I know that Kaz took it really hard when he heard about Minato," Junpei said.

"There was a lot of people that was torn up over his death," Yukari looked out towards the patio that led out towards the beach. "He touched so many lives in his time in Port Island."

"Hopefully we can find something out. I want to know more about senpai. About the life he lived, what he had to go through in order to become the person he was." Ken spoke up.

"Let me keep reading while we wait. Maybe we can learn something more about him," Yukari settled back in to her seat as the others all agreed that it was the best they could do until Fuuka and Mitsuru came back. She opened the journal back up and began to read once more.

Author's Note:

Things are about to pick up in the plot next chapter. I admit that the beginning of this story does start out slow but the pace is very much intentional. Although I recognize the fact that it has the potential to turn people away from it, its set up that way simply because it is what makes sense for the story. This is a story that happens between the end of Persona 3 The Answer and a month before the beginning of Persona 4. It's a transition period for a lot of them. Even though we are only focused on a few characters, a lot of them are deciding their futures here.

Some spoilers ahead...just me rambling about Minato and Yukari's relationship.

In my mind there are two distinct moments where the relationship between Minato and Yukari change in the game. Although my fan fiction has several smaller moments...there are two events that are intricately woven into the main plot of the original game even if you never pursue her social link. The first being the Hierophant and Lovers Full Moon and the other being the events at Yakushima. Obviously in the actual game the events of the hotel room are not anywhere like what happens in this fan fiction...however Minato does see something that under normal circumstances he never would have. Naturally I'm talking about Yukari in a towel but that doesn't really mean there is any development in their relationship...no its the fact that up to this point Minato has saved her life a few times (probably more than that if you count the actual battles you go through in the game. No doubt when playing through you had to save Yukari a few times) and just the intense feelings of that moment. I mean we only get a sense of it...but how bad had it been for them? And what had really woke Yukari up from her senses? A lot of that original scene in the game made me feel like there was a lot that was being left out. So here, I try to wrap it all up to the plot. Also some minor switching of dialogue. Those with a keen eye would have noticed that Minato actually says Yukari's original lines because in the way I changed the scene it no longer made much sense for Yukari to say it...but made all the sense for Minato. Anyway lets move on to Yukari.

Two things happen for Yukari because of the events of this Full Moon. She realizes what kind of power that the Shadows actually are capable, it is both eye opening and scary. Up to this point all the battles had been straight forward with no real trick to them other than the difference in weaknesses and the trap that was set by the previous Full Moon boss. And at this point she also realizes that she can't continue to hide her own feelings not just from others but herself. And this was also the first time she was forced to consider her feelings towards Minato. Or at the very least became incredibly aware of him more than she had been before. How could anyone not? Lust is not something that can just go away. Typically once you are attracted to someone and cross a line, it is nearly impossible to go back. Ask anyone who has been in a relationship. When you kiss someone it only gets easier to do it again for both parties involved, especially if it was a particularly good kiss. It sure as hell isn't going to leave your thoughts any time soon.

I can only imagine the kind of thoughts that had been constantly running through Yukari's head. Her father had died working under the employ of the Kirijo Group...and she knew that what was described as the incident was a fabrication because she knew her father better than that. Even if it might be a blind devotion because of the love of her father. She wanted to find out the truth, no matter what. Which is why she had acted the way she did most of the time.

However that determination to find the truth occasionally was akin to a steam roller. Everyone was an enemy to Yukari who hid the truth from her. The only one that ever seemed to step in front of her...was Minato so he would either slow her down or get steam rolled himself. In the game the only person that ever seemed to make her see reason was Minato in a roundabout way. The events of Yakushima are definitely big indicator of that. So the events of this full moon, and Yakushima are the huge turning points in their relationship. Even the game supports it as her Social Link is only available after the event at Yakushima. Granted their relationship is going to go a lot different in this story. And it happened much more organically in my opinion.

I wanted to wrap their relationship closer to the main plot. So expect social link interactions to go differently than you remembered. Still a few chapters away from that.

I love this chapter but...I should mention that the next chapter will have significant reveals and hopefully some big surprises. Hope you look forward to it. You know the drill here, read, review and see you tomorrow with Chapter 7.