Hello there, -insert shallow apologies for not publishing in forever- Sooooo here it is!
Poland
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"Like, Lithuania, I totally gotta show you this awesome snake skin coat I got the other day."
"But, Poland I-"
"No liet!, You have to see it, it's hot pink and has black fur and zippers in all kinds of places, if it were pants I could stick my pecker out of multiple holes, isn't that like totally rad! "
"...Poland... really I-"
"And guess what, I even got you one, it's blue, like, not sky blue kinda like a blueberry blue...or maybe ocean water blue...Gawd, there are like, so many types of blues! I'll just like totally go get it and show you, it's so gnarly!"
"Poland!"
"Hold that thought Liet, I'll be right back"
So, Poland goes into the closet to retrieve the jacket he bought for his ...friend... Lithuania.
-In closet-
"Like, why doesn't the sun ever shine in here?"
-Door slams shut-
"Totally not cool, like, my manicure so does not glow in the dark, lying manicurist."
Know your stars
Know your stars
Know your stars
"My yoga instructor can do God-like things for your body, but he not like, famous or anything…not like me!...Yet."
Feliks Lukasiewicz, Made out with his pony
"Uh, like, Gag me with a spoon please, that's so grotesque, pony's my BFFL"
Feliks Lukasiewicz, your Butt Fucking friend lover?
"Like Bogus! He's my best friend for life!"
-shakes handle-
"Okay this is grody, unlock the door"
Felik Lukasiewicz, has never had a real friend
"Okay, this is so totally not funny! I have all kinds of friends!"
Feliks Lukasiewicz, has never-
-cut off by cell ring tone-
-I was like, she was all, he was all, they were like, we were like oh mi god, like, totally, we were like, I was all, they were all, he was like, she was like, oh totally, like oh my god!-
"Ello! Poland here! No, I'm not busy right now."
…well excuse me Feliks Lukasiewicz, I'm not here at all
"Like no way! Totally, like awesome, No friggin way…Okay…okay…Like dude that's so totally awesome."
Feliks Lukasiewicz, does not-
"Like, wait a sec." –cover end of cell- "Like excuse you but I'm like totally on the phone right now with my best galpal! So like, shut up and stuff please."
Feliks Lukasiewicz, Never-
"Okay I'm back…no he didn't, omg Ukraine that's so totally awesome! No way!"
Feliks Lukasiewicz, can't actually count
"Like no fricking way Urkaine! Omg Omg OMG! I like totally disagree."
Feliks Lukasiewicz, hates the color pink
"No way, no way, no way…..No waay lol, like yes eat it all!"
Felik Lukasiewicz, wears girly underwear to feel sexy
"Dude if I were you I'd totally smack that with a fish."
Felik Lukasiewicz, watches Nyan cat for hours, and enjoys it!?
"OMG! We need to go shopping! I saw this top that totally complements your frame and stuff."
Felik Lukasiewicz, has no sense of style what so ever!
"Okay Ukraine babe, I gotta go but I'll like totally call you later I swear mkay, bye girlfriend! Kisses!"
-hangs up-
"Okay listen bitch, I have more style in this one strand of hair then you'll ever have in like, your entire meaningless life. Now, open this door before I open a can of whoop- ass and go all Warsaw bitchy mode on you, then I'll bring pony in here and you so totally don't want that okay."
-Door creaks open-
"Like taking voice lessons would hurt either, you sound like pony when he takes a constipated dump, oh wait I just totally lied, you sound much worse than that."
-Poland grabs jacket and walks away-
…your last name is stupid!-
So, Poland headed back to Lithuania, ready to show him the awesome jacket he so considerately bought for him.
"Like Lithuania here is it, isn't it like so totally awesome, rad, and stylish!"
"Poland, I can't see objects when we're talking through a land-line phone…"
Poland laughed into the phone at his friend.
"Liet, you're like, soooo, silly, all you need to do is look through the little holes in the phone and you'll see the jacket, gawd Liet, you're so slow sometimes!"
Poland aimed the phone at the jacket.
"See it's totally awesome patterns and stuff, like cool right"
"…Poland I…ugh….it's a nice jacket Poland…"
"OMG, I totally knew you would like it come over and try it on!"
"What about tomorrow or something, I can't really leave righ-"
"No Liet! You like so totally have to come today! Tomorrow me and Ukraine are going on a shopping spree, and you never wanna go and I like so need someone to carry my extra bags and there was this dress that I would look so cute in I want you to see by the way I want you to get a pedicure with me again and I need-"
"Oh um I'll just come today, I'll be right over okay!"
" A new pair of, oh that's like so awesome Liet I'll be waiting, shoes and then I want to , help Ukraine find something other tha those overalls she wears …and maybe a support bra and then I think we need to get matching-"
"I ..I can't leave if you're talking on the phone." Seconds later Lithuania's landline phone when dead and he was so very happy for Poland had finally shut up and gave him a grace period of silence until he reached Poland's house. Just as Lithuania got in his car his cell rung.
"Hello, Lithuania speaking."
"Hi Liet, I had to like totally go and find my cell, anyways, I think we should get matching unicorn horns and ride on pony into the sun set or maybe king and queen outfits, but I'm the king and…. "
On the inside Lithuania broke down and cried while he got in his car and drove to Poland's house, thank god they were close neighbors but unfortunately for him Poland always randomly checked to see if he was still listening, which he was, and it was a totally awesome one-sided conversation Lithuania listened to the entire ride there.
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If you want to here Poland's ring tone, go here,
youtube.
com
watch?v=q7IHzrgc54s
although I'm sure everyone has heard that song before.
Thanks for reading!...stupid non linking