A/N: Please note that this will probably be the first and only of Abby's midwife appointments that will be seen in this story. I'll still include lots of pregnancy moment with her and Tim, but I hate writing about something I know nothing about and my research really didn't turn up enough for me to be comfortable writing more of these appointments. Thanks for reading!

"Abby!" Matt called Wednesday morning, trying to be heard over the music. "Good grief, what is that noise? I think the CD must be scratched or something."

She turned off the stereo just in time to hear his comment. Abby crossed her arms and glared at him darkly. "That happens to be my favourite band."

Matt stopped. "Oh." He couldn't think of anything brilliant to say and couldn't in good conscience take back the words because he wouldn't mean it. "Well, Gibbs sent me - "

Abby frowned. "Where's my Caf-Pow?"

His eyebrows rose. "I...uh, forgot?"

Tami watched from the door of Abby's office as her boss's white complexion slowly flushed and she clenched her fists. "Get. Out."

Matt looked at her in confusion. "But Gibbs-"

"No," she said firmly. "I don't care. Send Gibbs or Tony but you are hereby banned from my lab. Leave!" Wrapping her arms around Bert, Abby squeezed him for comfort and his signature sound had Matt turning around in shocked surprise.

"Was that the-"

"Agent Collins you have two seconds to remove yourself from my space before-" Abby didn't even get to finish her threat before Matt was out the door and into the stairwell.

Tami glanced from Abby to the open lab door and decided she'd better go try to straighten things out before the rumours started flying. Still steaming, the forensic scientist didn't even notice that her assistant had gone AWOL. Tami hurried out and threw open the stairwell door.

"Agent Collins!" she called, hearing slow footsteps rounding the corner. The steps stopped and she jogged up the stairs to join him. He eyed her warily when she held out her hand. "Hi, I'm Tami. We haven't met but I'm Abby's new assistant."

Matt was slow in shaking her hand, sure he'd heard somewhere that the forensic scientist didn't allow assistants. "Hi. Did Abby send you after me with the rest of that threat?"

Tami bit her lip. "Um, no. I just wanted to..." She made a face. "You do know that couldn't have gone much worse, right? I mean, I've only known Abby since yesterday and I already know you insulted pretty much everything she holds sacred except Gibbs and Agent McGee. How long have you been on the team?"

Matt sighed and rubbed his face. "A few months. But my introduction to Abby was brief and I haven't often been sent to the lab. At first it was Ziva, now Tony and Gibbs always go instead, or McGee if there's something involving computers." He shook his head. "I guess with her taste in clothes I should've guessed at the death metal, but a farting hippo, really?"

Tami shrugged. "I don't get it either, but I don't have to. The lab rules are simple: Don't lie to Abby, respect the music, Bert is sacred, and never come without a Caf-Pow. You broke three of them."

He echoed Ziva's first question about the rules. "I don't suppose those are written down somewhere?"

"No," Tami agreed, "but you might want to memorize them. And I'd bring a peace offering as soon as possible." She turned to go back downstairs and then looked over her shoulder. "The blue cup Agent Collins, Abby's pregnant and can't have regular Caf-Pow anymore."

While he hadn't been told directly, adding to his feeling of being an outsider in the close knit group, Matt had found out that Agent McGee and his wife were expecting a child. Truth be told, because she didn't look it he'd forgotten he was dealing with a pregnant woman whose moods could be unpredictable. He'd never been quite so scared of women as when his sister was pregnant and flipping out over the dumbest things. But there had been no reasoning with her either. "Tami," he called, waiting for her to look at him again, "my name is Matt, Agent Collins is a little too formal." Matt took a breath. "Look, would you maybe like to get a coffee sometime? Y'know, us newbies should stick together."

She seemed nervous all of a sudden and he wondered if she was in a relationship, which would make things awkward. But after staring at him just long enough for it to be uncomfortable, Tami nodded. "Yeah, maybe, sometime." She started down the stairs. "Peace offering, don't forget."

Trying to decide which was more important - sending someone else down to the lab on Agent Gibbs' errand or soothing the ruffled feathers of the intriguing but probably deadly forensic scientist, Matt headed towards the Caf-Pow machines first. Explaining the situation to Gibbs was definitely the less scary option at this point. He'd heard that Abby could remove a person from existence without leaving any forensic evidence and Matt wasn't particularly interested in being the one to test that theory.

NCIS

"Did you hear him?" Abby fumed the minute Tami returned. "Insulting my music, not bringing any Caf-Pow and was he really asking if that was Bert or me?" Her ire was only fueled by remembering her brief encounter with the temporary team member. "What kind of person doesn't like Plastic Death?"

Tami moved closer and put her hand on Abby's arm. "I don't think he meant it the way it sounded. You know how guys tend to dig deeper holes when they're nervous."

Having experienced that with Tim many times, Abby calmed down a notch. "Fine. But he started it and if he thinks he's coming back into my lab any time soon, he's very mistaken."

"I bet he comes armed with Caf-Pow and doesn't say a word about your music," Tami predicted, opting not to share yet that the new guy had, in a way, asked her out.

Abby crossed her arms and kissed her hippo's nose. "He should apologize to Bert too."

The assistant could have mentioned that it was unlikely, but refrained. Sometimes, and she'd picked up on a lot of things awfully fast since yesterday afternoon with the many chances she'd had to observe Abby with her team, it was better just to let the woman vent without trying to correct her.

"So we're still waiting for the analysis on that blood you got last night, right?" she asked, going for distraction over resolution.

Abby glanced back at her mass spectrometer. "Yeah. And I want to take another look at the tox screen. Something seemed hinky."

"Can I help?" Tami offered, hoping to make up for Matt's unintentional error.

"Fingerprints," Abby said, pointing towards the table. "We need to look for a match."

NCIS

By the time Matt had finally finished telling the story, McGee looked like he was debating whether even he wanted to face Abby right now, while Tony was laughing so hard he could barely breathe, not even trying to disguise his utter amusement at their assistant probie's grievious error in judgement.

Gibbs glared at the newest agent. "Fix this."

Matt sighed. "Yes sir, I'm trying, but she won't let me back in the lab."

The team leader did not care. "Get creative."

In desperation Matt looked to McGee but he was not getting in the middle. Tony shook his head slowly. "Poor assistant probie. Well, at least you survived to learn the lesson." He leaned over his desk. "I'd suggest copious amounts of Caf-Pow, concert tickets and maybe a new dog collar for Bert." Tony put his hands on his hips. "And then never, ever, ever get on her bad side again."

Rolling his eyes, Matt made his way to his cubicle desk and Tony pulled out his phone to text Ziva. He tried to word it to be amusing, although telling her the full story later in person would be so much better. AP put his foot in it with Abby. He now owes her Caf-Pow for life.

Then Tony checked to see that Gibbs was gone and Matt was too busy thinking to listen in, and walked over to his co-worker's desk. "Hey McGoogle, I need a favour."

McGee eyed his friend skeptically, still thinking about his wife. "What kind of favour?" Friends they might be and it was long overdue, but Tim wouldn't put it past Tony to make things difficult somehow.

Tony leaned casually against the filing cabinet. "Need you to find the best CDs for learning a different language."

Sensing a seriousness in the request, Tim leaned back. "Hebrew?"

"Bingo," Tony grinned. "You'd be good at Twenty Questions, didn't even need three guesses." He ran his fingers through his hair. "That's a part of her I can't even get close to and I need to try. I think she's trying to teach me a little bit here and there, but I really want to know more and I need to learn it fast."

Tony didn't mention that he'd never been able to forget the words Ziva had whispered one night when he held her after a nightmare. It had sounded important, like she was pleading with him for something, but she hadn't spoken in English and he needed to find out what the phrase meant.

McGee nodded in understanding. "Give me some time, I'll see what I can find."

Tony clapped him on the shoulder. "'ppreciate that Tim, thanks."

"You can return it some day Tony," Tim called after him and Tony winked.

"Will do." Whatever it took to get further into Ziva's world, Tony was all over it.

NCIS

Abby and McGee walked into the midwife clinic shortly after five pm. They sat down but didn't have to wait long before Abby's name was called by a smiling woman with long brown hair. She held out her hand. "Hi, I'm Cassie. I'm kind of in charge of our group."

Tim shook her hand, then raised an eyebrow. "Group?"

"Yes," Cassie explained. "Midwives work in groups of three or four and we'll take turns overseeing your appointments." She led them back to a comfortable, well lit room where three other ladies sat with welcoming expressions on their faces.

"Abby and Tim," Cassie said, "this is Brittney, Kylie and Delaney, your other midwives."

Brittney, who looked college aged with dark rimmed glasses and hair back in a clip, grinned. "We're the i's and the y's." She chuckled and Cassie rolled her eyes.

"Britt is our student midwife. She's been with us about three months and is doing well. If you're comfortable, she'll join us in providing your care."

Abby shrugged. "Umm, sure, I guess."

Cassie regarded the black-haired girl seriously. "There's no pressure. We want this to be a good experience for both of you."

"No, it's okay," Abby decided, "she can stay."

Delaney, whose long blonde hair was pulled back in a french braid, shook hands with them next. Kylie, who looked to be about Abby's age, had auburn hair cut very short. She reminded Abby of a pixie and she liked the woman immediately.

"Okay," Cassie declared, "now that we're all introduced, let's get started. First, the boring stuff. I'm going to need medical history from both you and your husband."

That part actually didn't take very long. Aside from Abby's parents being deaf and her aunt's memory problems, there wasn't much to say. Her grandparents on her mom's side were healthy and active up until their deaths. Her dad's parents had been quiet and gentle people, dying of old age within weeks of each other. Tim's family was also clear. Nothing notable on his mom's side. and he assumed his paternal grandmother would be the opinionated spitfire she was until death dragged her away kicking and complaining.

Cassie looked over her shoulder when they finished. "Britt, first test question - can you explain to Abby and Tim the difference between midwives and OBs?"

With three months of practical application to back up her schooling, Britt had no trouble answering the question and then Delaney stepped forward wearing gloves and holding a needle and a handful of vials. "Time to take some blood I'm afraid."

Abby held out her arm without hesitation, though McGee turned a little green. "I've had lots of tattoos, so needles don't bother me," she explained, patting her husband's leg. "Timmy, on the other hand, is a little squeamish." He shifted uncomfortably and didn't really make eye contact with any of them.

Drawing blood didn't take long and Tim relaxed visibly once the needle was disposed of and the blood out of sight. Crime scene blood was one thing. Blood belonging to his wife was something different entirely. Cassie ticked off another item on her list and pointed at Kylie.

"Can you do her vitals Ky?"

The pixie-ish woman quickly and efficiently checked Abby's blood pressure, heartrate, thyroid and lungs while Cassie jotted down the numbers. Then she grinned at Abby and McGee. "Okay, now the fun part. Since you're here kind of late for your first appointment - most are before ten weeks - we're going to do to do a dating ultrasound to make sure your guess is right. And then," her eyes sparkled, "you get to hear the baby's heartbeat."

Abby grinned real big and hugged Tim. "Our first look at our baby," she whispered and he just squeezed her hand, the whole experience leaving him at a loss for words.

The woman had Abby lie down on the exam table with her shirt rolled up to her ribs and her pants pulled down just below her hips. Cassie rolled the tube of gel between her hands for a minute to warm it and then squeezed some on Abby's stomach, sliding the transducer over it. The machine in the corner came to life and a fuzzy picture filled the screen. McGee stared in awe as Cassie pointed out body parts and facial features and turned up the volume so they could hear the baby's heart.

Abby's eyes widened. "Wow, it's so fast."

"Fast is good and it's a nice strong heartbeat," Cassie reassured her, doing measurement and checking for the routine things. "Congratulations guys, you have a healthy baby here."

Tim's fingers curled around Abby's and he kissed her cheek. This was definitely one of those moment when he felt like a dad already. Getting to see their baby on screen, alive and moving, just made it so much more real.

After a couple minutes Cassie printed them a picture, shut the machine down and wiped the gel off with a cloth. Then she felt Abby's abdomen to check the size of her uterus. Finally she sat down and made some notes while Abby fixed her clothes and McGee stared at the first picture of their baby. His baby. Geez, he'd never imagined using those words.

"Okay," Cassie said at last, "everything looks good. Now Abby, I know you mentioned that your cycle is quite irregular, which is why it took so long to discover your pregnancy. So the due date I give you will be tentative, but I'll be able to confirm or change it as you get further along. From the baby's size, I think your guess is spot on at fifteen weeks. That puts your estimated delivery date at September fourteenth."

Abby slid her arm through Tim's and wiggled in her chair. "September? Gosh, that feels so far away."

"Twenty-five weeks," Brittney confirmed. "But it'll go so fast you won't even notice until the end."

"I'll take your word for it." Abby made a face. "Uh, can I use your bathroom?" Her trips there were becoming more frequent, but weren't excessive yet.

"Good timing," Delaney commented, handing her a sample cup. "We need to do a urine test."

Abby rolled her eyes. "Oh the joys and glamour of being pregnant."

The women chuckled and Tim took advantage of his wife's absence to ask a few questions about her care and how often appointments would be, among other things. It didn't take long for Abby to return and then Cassie announced that they'd end with checking Abby's height and weight and would he please step out into the hall for that?

Knowing women's sensitivity about their weight, Tim agreed and left. He wasn't sure what they talked about while he waited, but when he returned, McGee could see by the tightness around her mouth and the hard set of her eyes that she was less than impressed. All told, the appointment lasted an hour and then they said goodbye and walked out. Once they were back in the sunshine, Tim pulled Abby to a stop and faced her.

"What happened Abbs?" She avoided his eyes but he wouldn't let up and grasped her shoulders lightly.

Abby crossed her arms. "I know they're just doing their jobs, but even after seeing us together Cassie still had the nerve to ask about our relationship. Is it healthy? Is it safe? Does he abuse you? What's your living situation like? Does his job make him violent? Does he ever react in a way that makes you afraid? Did he want this baby?" She growled the words out and stamped her foot. "I think they're great and all but I really don't like them right now."

The questions shook Tim to the core and he wasn't sure how to feel. Had he given any indication that he didn't love Abby and wasn't excited about their baby? Did they see something in him that questioned his treatment of her? Abby read each insecurity in his eyes and threw her arms around him.

"They have to ask," she whispered, "it's just routine. But I told them that you're the best husband anyone could ask for and no one's ever loved me like you do and told them to please mind their own business."

Tim held her tightly, smiling a little when he imagined the scene because it was unlikely she'd been that polite about it. He sighed into her hair. "I wonder if they saw something in me-" but Abby put her finger over his lips.

"No Timmy, don't. I know you. You're not like that."

He framed her face with his hands. "I would never hurt you Abby, I need you to know that I couldn't. But if something happened and I did-"

She snorted. "You're right, it wouldn't happen. But if you did somehow go all Jekyll and Hyde on me, I'd drop kick your butt and leave you for Gibbs." He swallowed and she leaned in to kiss him. "I know you wouldn't Tim, you don't have it in your to hurt people."

He hugged her hard, beyond grateful for the way she believed in him and always saw the best, and they continued to their car. Tim opened the door for his wife and walked slowly around to his side. Of everything he'd seen and heard at the appointment, it was the memory of hearing his baby's heartbeat and the picture in his pocket that would stick the longest.

NCIS

"Alright," Tony declared after supper, dropping onto the couch beside Ziva and waving a notebook. He scrawled something across the top of the first page, underlined it with a flourish and presented it, grinning, for her inspection. "The Official DiNozzo-David Wedding To-Do List!"

Ziva raised one eyebrow lazily. "Why does your name get to be first?"

"Uh..." Tony stalled because even with the teasing glint in her eyes, he knew she'd probably hurt him if his answer was, 'I'm the guy.' "Because my name has two capital letters," he said slowly, not sure if it was supposed to be a question or a statement.

She stared at him long enough to make him want to squirm, before settling back into the couch and nodding. "Okay."

Tony sighed in relief. That had been a close call. "So," he held the pen between his fingers, ready to take notes, "what's first?"

"Let us write down everything and then cross off what is already done." Tony nodded in agreement, so she started. "Location."

"Wedding party," he put in, "photographer."

Ziva pursed her lips, thinking. "Music, dress, flowers."

"Pack so we can move you again," Tony added, sure that wasn't her favourite thing that needed to be done. "Ooh, and food! I wonder if we can get someone to cater?"

Ziva frowned. "We have not even picked a time!"

He laughed and put that next on the growing list. "Yeah, I guess that would help." Tony thought about it. "Probably need to find volunteers to help with set up and take down. I don't think there will be a lot, but it would be good to have that covered anyways."

Ziva touched her ring. "And we have to find someone to perform the ceremony."

Tony's eyes widened like a light had gone on. "Right. Wow, I can't believe I didn't think about that before." He eyed his fiancee carefully. "Are you okay with just a Justice of the Peace? They're best for short notice."

She let herself briefly imagine what a Jewish wedding would have looked like, with all the traditions and customs that made it beautiful and meaningful. But just as quickly she shook the thought away, not looking at him when she answered quietly. "Yes, that will be fine."

Tony caught her expression, which was pretty much the opposite of fine, but filed it away and chose not to comment about it now. "Anything else?"

Ziva shrugged. "I cannot think of any more things to add right now."

"Okay, well let's cross off what we've already done then and see what's left." He added a note by 'photographer' and drew a line through it. "Someone to take pictures - check."

"Location," Ziva pointed, scooting closer to read the list. Tony put 'Mallard Manor' in brackets, then stroked that item off. "Wedding party, since you already sorted it out." Another line and notation. "Dress." Tony nodded and Ziva paused, waiting for the news to sink in.

He drew a line through the word and then looked at it again before turning to stare at her. "Wait, you found a dress already? When?"

She couldn't help but smile. "Yesterday."

Tony looked dumbfounded for a moment, then grinned. "That's awesome." He frowned. "When were you going to tell me?"

"I just did," Ziva said matter-of-factly.

"Fine, keep your secrets," he grouched good-naturedly. "But I'd tell you if it was something exciting like that."

Ziva bit her lip to keep from laughing. "I am not sure how I would react if you told me you had found the perfect dress Tony."

He rolled his eyes. "That is not what I meant." Then his eyes lit up. "Do I get a sneak peek of this perfect dress?"

"Not unless the rules have changed since the last time you asked," she said seriously.

Tony shrugged. "It was worth a try." He glanced at their list. "So, flowers. Any ideas?"

A smile spread slowly across Ziva's mouth as a picture popped into her head. "Yes. I think I will carry three dark pink, long stemmed tulips."

Tony's eyebrows jumped up. "I didn't think pink was a ninja colour."

"I want them to match my ring," she explained. "One for me, one for you and one for the baby. Abby can have white rose buds." It was her concession to not actually wearing white. At least it would still be included in the wedding.

He winced. "As long as I don't have to wear pink, we're good. It's not exactly a guy colour Zi." He tapped his pen on the page, keeping their conversation focused. "Music?"

"What would you like to hear Tony?" Ziva asked. "It is your wedding too."

He grinned. "I'm thinking Sinatra, a little Elvis maybe, a few of the classics. What are your favourites?"

"There are some beautiful Hebrew hymns I would enjoy playing during the ceremony, but it is not really important."

Tony tipped her chin up. "Your wants are very important to me Ziva."

She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you." She couldn't remember another time in her life when someone had valued her opinions and thought what she wanted actually mattered.

He turned to kiss her forehead and saw her fighting to keep blinking normally. "Getting tired sweetheart?"

"I think I like that name," Ziva murmured, not really answering him.

"Do you want to keep going?" Tony secretly hoped that she'd be too tired to drive home. Even having her in the same house would be better than nothing, at this point he'd take what he could get.

Ziva yawned. "What do we have left?"

He checked. "Just choosing a time, for now. We can worry about packing up your apartment later."

Ziva's hand found his, a pattern he was used to but hadn't figured out yet traced on the back over and over. "An afternoon wedding would be nice. Then there is no rushing to get ready."

"I like the sound of that," Tony decided immediately. "How's two o'clock?"

"What? Oh, fine," she responded sleepily.

Tony set his notebook on the coffeetable and his priorities quickly rearranged themselves. "Okay Sleeping Beauty, time for bed." She opened her mouth to protest but he set his finger on her lips. "No Zi, no arguing. You're exhausted and you shouldn't be driving right now."

She glared at him through half-closed eyes, which kind of minimized the effect. "You are taking advantage of my condition."

He laughed. "I'll take the couch Zi. I just want you here and safe."

Ziva touched her belly lightly as they moved slowly up the stairs. "He is being smug," she told the baby, everything combining at the moment to make her a little grouchy.

"Uh huh, I love you too," Tony said with a smile, ignoring the look he got in return.

Once in his room he handed her the clothes of his that she used as pyjamas. The shirt was snug over her bump but still fit and the pants, if tied under her growing abdomen, worked well enough. He tucked her in, kissed her forehead and turned around at the door, knowing she'd already be asleep. Tony smiled as he leaned against the frame to watch her. Ziva sleeping in his bed? Yeah, that was a sight he could get used to.

NCIS

"Five months," Tim whispered against Abby's sweat slicked skin that night, still breathing hard from their recent activities.

Abby laughed and kissed his chest, tasting salt on her lips. "Yeah, and I'm four months pregnant. Ironic, isn't it?"

His hand fell to below her navel, where the beginning of a bump was just starting to be noticeable. He pressed his lips to her hair. "Wouldn't change a thing." McGee thought about it for a moment and chuckled. "So what, maybe six weeks after our wedding? I wonder if you ever know the moment it happens."

Abby's eyes lit with a teasing glow and she wound her arms around his neck. "Well, we didn't miss a whole lot of days in the beginning."

He snorted. "Not like we miss many now either." But Tim's body warmed just from the way she was looking at him and he knew what she meant. After two months of sleeping side by side and only sleeping, they'd been more than happy to indulge in the pleasure of each other whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Abby pulled back suddenly. "Do you remember what you promised me when you proposed?" The look of panic that leapt into his face told her he didn't. She kissed her husband slowly. "You promised me that once everyone knew, we'd take the honeymoon we never got."

Recognition replaced worry and Tim slid his arms around her back. "Right, I remember now. What are you thinking?"

"Second week of April," Abby replied immediately. "For one week. It's before Tony and Ziva's wedding, before their baby is due and before I get too big."

"Okay." McGee liked that she already knew the details. "Where are we going?"

"Well..."she hedged, "I haven't figured that part out yet. Dollywood just doesn't seem romantic enough for a honeymoon." Abby shrugged. "But we have to decide asap so we can book it."

"Sounds good to me," Tim agreed, dragging her back into his body to cuddle. "Time for bed now?"

Abby leaned up to cover his mouth with hers. "Soon," she whispered, her kisses, touches and caresses working them back into a frenzy.

McGee complied with no complaints, quickly getting lost in his wife again. If he'd thought sex with Abby before was great, now it was even better thanks to the pregnancy hormones. Nope, he definitely wouldn't change a thing.