Chapter 36:
Three days later, Clarke was sitting with Lexa on the edge of the bed watching as the healer re-wrapped her leg.
"It looks a lot better." She said.
"Feels a lot better too."
"Put one time today and tomorrow." Atami attempted in the broken English she'd ben learning since relocating to the city. "Back to check after feast. Heda healed better then." She explained and held out a bottle of some medicine she'd been applying to Lexa's leg since she was bought home from the hospital. Abby had checked it out. It was basically a numbing, anti-inflammatory made from herbs gathered in the woods. Abby marveled at its ability to stave off infection and considered including it in the hospital's inventory since they were running so low on the standard medicines she was accustomed too.
"Thank you." Clarke took the bottle and the healer grabbed her bag and left the room.
"How are the plans for the feast?" Lexa asked her.
Clarke set the bottle down on the table next to the bed and more to lie beside Lexa, turning to face her.
"They're fine." She placed her hand again on Lexa's cheek and ran her fingers along her jaw. "You know, if things go how we hope they go here, you won't ever have to wear that black war paint again."
Lexa smiled.
"And you won't have to fire a gun again or add to your nightmares." Lexa reached over and pulled Clarke in closer to her. "We can make this work, Clarke."
"It's going to be hard. Not everyone will just agree. Indra's already seen some people fighting over food."
"And they were jailed because of it. We will set examples and the people will fall in line or they will be imprisoned or exiled."
"I'm worried winter will come before we can get everyone here from the capital."
"My people are used to the harsh winters, remember? They will help your people get through it, Clarke. By spring, the ground will thaw and we will grow crops and have the power up and running and have the cars and planes working again. We'll have a system in place to govern."
"That all sounds really nice." Clarke told her and placed her hand on Lexa's hip. "You've gotten optimistic. I never thought I would have said that about you."
"The thought of peace has changed my mood." Lexa replied.
"We have a meeting with the council the day after tomorrow to discuss job assignments. We may not have enough skilled people to help with the plant and the dam."
"We will worry about that then, Clarke. I want one night with you where we are not worrying about the future of-"
"Humanity?" Clarke completed. "The healer said you needed to rest."
"The night I was speaking of is tomorrow night." Lexa started. "I want to go to the celebration with you and leave all worry behind."
"That sounds nice too."
"Lincoln came to me this afternoon." Lexa explained and rolled over on her back, straightening her leg.
"How is he?" Clarke asked. She knew he was out of the hospital, but she hadn't seen him since he was unconscious.
"He has improved. He sought my permission for something and I granted it only to realize that it is no longer my decision to grant these things as you and I rule together now."
"What did he want permission for?" Clarke asked.
"He wishes to bond with Octavia."
"Oh. Wow."
"He asked to have the ceremony done at the feast tomorrow night. I'd given my permission earlier, but that was before the battle and he wants to do it sooner than he expected he would. My assumption is that his near death experience made him want to bond with Octavia as soon as possible."
"What about the rest of the tradition?" Clarke questioned.
"We can make our own traditions now. They will be new as this city is new." Lexa looked over at Clarke.
"Does Octavia know about this?" Clarke asked.
"He was on his way to her after I granted permission. I assume you do not have a problem with it. If so, I can-"
"Of course not." Clarke interjected. "If it's what they want, then I'm happy for them. I don't think anyone needs my permission to bond."
"It will add to the celebration." Lexa expressed. "I look forward to when you and I can also share in their happiness."
Clarke's eyes met Lexa's and she reached inside them with her mind to try to understand what Lexa meant by that.
"To your people, we're already bonded, Lexa."
Lexa's shy smile returned.
"They are our people now, Clarke."
"Yeah." Clarke absentmindedly agreed.
"I thought you had accepted your position as Chancellor."
"I have." Clarke sighed. "It's just still hard to wrap my head around it all. I guess I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop."
Lexa looked at her confused.
"I don't know that expression."
"It just means I haven't adjusted to the idea that there's no more war. I'm still waiting for someone to come after us… all of this."
"And they will."
"That's not comforting." Clarke squinted at her.
"If you're here for comforting, you're in the wrong place, Clarke. Someone will come after us again for what we have. It is the way of this world, but we will be prepared. We will get our army ready, we will rebuild this city and our people from Camp Jaha and the capital and other villages will eventually make their way here to make us stronger. We will have the power back on soon; we will have gasoline for the cars. We will have food and hunt what we cannot grow. We will have a life, Clarke."
Clarke thought for a moment about what Lexa was saying and how far they'd come. They first met when their people were at war. It was Lexa that demanded Finn's death and almost cost Raven hers. They'd began a shaky alliance and when the missile crushed 250 of their people, they grew closer until Lexa kissed her for the first time and confessed feelings for Clarke above all others. When the betrayal came at the mountain, Clarke was terrified she'd led her people to their deaths, but there was a moment when she wondered about her life without Lexa in it. The pang of heartache crept in and she forgot about everything else in that moment.
She never intended to see her again, but her walk led her straight to the capital where Lexa awaited her and managed to win her over again despite Clarke's initial reservations. They'd both given into their feelings and had to admit that this was how it was supposed to be. As Clarke looked at her now, she realized once again that while Abby had been concerned Lexa was changing Clarke for the worst; she was really making her stronger. They'd changed each other in that way. She no longer needed that time apart, that time to think on her own.
"When things die down again after the celebration and after Octavia and Lincoln bond… assuming she says yes…" She added with a smile. "Let's…" She paused not really knowing how to say what she was trying to say given all they'd been through together. She didn't want it to be trivial, but she already felt so connected to the girl in front of her that she almost felt a ceremony redundant. "Let's find a way to celebrate us."
"Celebrate?" Lexa smiled.
"Yes, celebrate."
"Formally? Or is that too much? You've been avoiding answering." Lexa queried.
Clarke smiled at her and grazed her cheek with her fingertips.
"Formally. Informally. Whatever we want. We'll figure it out together. It won't be forced by some worry your people won't accept me. It won't be objected to because we're too young or because it's too fast. It won't be because we've been through war together and come out the other side. It won't be because one or both of us was fleeing something we didn't want to remember. It will be because we love each other." Clarke paused to take in the glow of Lexa's bright eyes. She thought of those nights she spent on her own outside before arriving at the capital. She'd felt like running many times since the council decided to ship her to the ground. The pressure of being a leader to her people had seemed like too much time and time again. When she finally did leave, she felt she had no choice. She could not be what they needed. Yet, after this battle, she felt as if she was the only one that could do the job as long as she had Lexa by her side. "I'm not going anywhere."
"Ai nou na teik yu bants nowe." I'm never going to let you go. Lexa leaned in and kissed Clarke deeply. When she pulled back, she pressed her lips gently to Clarke's forehead. "I heard one of the Sky People say something once. I think it fits here."
"What?"
"You are stuck with me." Lexa responded.
Clarke laughed at her and pulled her in.
"There's no one I'd rather be stuck with."
Lexa winced as her leg brushed up against Clarke's; her wound not yet fully healed. Clarke pressed her hand against the spot just above the bandage and looked down at it while resting her head on her other elbow. Lexa watched as Clarke cared for her and felt the pain in her leg dissipate.
"You were right." Lexa told her. "Hodnes laik uf." Love is strength.
The End