A/N: Okay guys, here we are, the last chapter before my break. I'm officially "off duty" until April 16. Hopefully by then I'll have enough chapters stored up to keep us going for awhile. Thanks so much for the great responses to the last couple chapters, even though the website was being difficult. I appreciate your thoughts, comments and support so much! Enjoy :)
On the way back to the hospital two ideas caught Tony simultaneously and he made a couple quick turns to take him back downtown. His first stop was at Just Blossoms where a lovely young woman named Melissa that he used to flirt with helped him choose a very nice bouquet for his wife.
Next Tony went to the jewellery store where he'd gotten Ziva's ring. Walking inside, he spied the man who helped him last time and waited rather impatiently for him to finish with the lady at the counter. Once she was satisfied, the clerk scanned the store and his eyes settled on Tony.
Stepping forward, Tony held out his hand. "John, right?"
John looked surprised. "I'm sorry, I can't place you."
Tony smiled. "You helped me find an engagement ring for my wife a few months ago."
A light went on in John's eyes. "The pink diamond, heart shaped, I remember now." He glanced at Tony's left hand. "So, you're married now? That was fast."
"You have no idea," Tony chuckled.
"What can I do for you today ...?"
"Tony," he supplied. "I need a new mom present and I was hoping you guys do custom designs."
Leading the way to the counter, John pulled out a blank notebook and pencil. "What did you have in mind?"
"A bracelet," Tony said decisively. "I want the band to be leather and three links across the top in white gold. One stone in each link - yellow topaz, diamond and sapphire - with sturdy settings so she can wear it to work. We have a demanding job," he explained.
John sketched while Tony talked and after a few simple changes, the picture he'd seen in his head began to take shape. Finally he nodded. "That's perfect. And can you burn her name in Hebrew characters with the words 'ILY Forever' on the inside of the band?" He spelled Ziva's name and waited hopefully.
Considering the request, John agreed. "We'll figure it out." He made some notations about size and other details on the paper and looked at Tony. "I think two weeks at the earliest. You can pay for it on pick up, how's that?"
Tony shook his hand again. "Fantastic, thanks man."
John smiled. "Anytime." Observing Tony's anxiety, he gestured towards the door. "Got to get back to the hospital?" Tony's eyebrows rose and the other man chuckled. "I've got three kids, I never liked leaving my wife alone either."
Glad someone understood, Tony grinned and started to go. "I'll be back."
"We'll call," John promised as the younger man left in a hurry.
It was shortly before six pm when Tony returned to Ziva's room after he'd acquired a vase from the nurses' station. Noting that his wife was asleep, he filled the vase with water and positioned the flowers so she'd see them when she opened her eyes.
When Tony checked on Chaya, he found her awake and calmly looking at what she could see of the world from her curled up position inside the bin. He noticed the blanket tucked around her waist but left loose at the bottom so she could kick. She was wearing one of the outfits Ziva had packed, white with purple cuffs and a butterfly pattern. The small purple cap covered her curls and she looked far too cute not to be held.
At just over five pounds, Chaya felt so light, so fragile in his arms and he settled her on his lap, where she fit with room to spare. "I guess I missed a few things while I was gone, didn't I princess?" He stroked her arm gently as she stared at him. "An outfit change, so I'm guessing your last feeding didn't agree or Grampa Gibbs was a little too enthusiastic about burping you."
The image of Gibbs wearing baby spit-up made him chuckle. He lifted the baby close to his face and breathed her in. "I think Mommy smells good, especially her hair, but this newborn perfume beats even that." Tony laid her on his chest and her little head nestled into his neck.
He enjoyed the cuddle until it became clear that she was rooting for something. Shifting her a little, he shook his head. "Sorry baby girl, you're not going to find what you're looking for on me." Ziva stirred and he smiled. "But it looks like Mommy's on top of things."
Ziva's eyes fluttered and she smiled at the picture. "Tony," she murmured, then saw the baby's head moving and sat up, holding out her arms. "My turn."
Tony transferred Chaya carefully to Ziva and watched as she adjusted her shirt to reveal her breast and helped her daughter latch on properly. A lactation consultant had been by after Gibbs left and before Chaya's last feeding and she felt better equipped now. She winced at the discomfort but her expression relaxed as it eased. He felt a little jealous that only Ziva could have that connection with Chaya and leaned forward.
She looked up and smiled at him. Tony cleared his throat. "Does it make you uncomfortable when I watch Zi?"
A frown creased her forehead as she thought about it, then shook her head slowly. "No." She seemed surprised by the answer and tried to explain it for both of them. She shrugged. "This is natural, this is how it is supposed to be. Feeding my child is what my breasts were intended for." She caressed Chaya's cheek, watching to make sure she was sucking and swallowing. "I am proud to be able to take care of her this way."
Tony bit his tongue, stifling things that didn't need to be said yet and gave her a half-grin. "I can honestly say I never thought of that use for them until the first time you fed her."
Ziva met his eyes and tried not to blush, but her smile was a little shy. "This is what they are for now." She hesitated but pressed on. "Perhaps one day they will have another purpose." Hope filled him that she could even think that way and he rubbed his thumb over her knee under the blanket. She glanced away to escape the intensity of his gaze and gasped at the huge bouquet of deep red roses.
"Oh Tony," she breathed, reaching out to gently finger the petals, "they are lovely. Thank you."
He kissed her hand. "You had to go through labour, flowers were the least I could do." He made a face. "How sore are you? Does it hurt a lot?" Without getting specific, she knew what he meant.
"Only when I move or stand or sit or walk." She shrugged one shoulder and kissed the baby's head. "She is worth it. I would go through that again just to have her here." The thought made her cringe but it was the truth.
"Brave words for less than twenty-four hours later," Tony commented, leaning back. "Gosh, has it not even been a day yet? It feels so much longer."
"I agree," Ziva said, letting Chaya finish and switching her to the other side. She kept the baby tucked close to her body and couldn't get over how tiny she seemed.
Tony rubbed his fingers over the receiving blanket in his lap. "How come she wasn't all bundled up when I got here?"
Ziva's eyes twinkled as she teased him. "I think you mean swaddled Tony. It is not often I get to correct you."
He leaned forward to kiss her. "Probably won't be the last time when it comes to all this baby stuff." Chaya's cap was slipping so he tugged it off and ghosted his fingers over the silky curls before looking at his wife. "So?"
Ziva rubbed the baby's back to keep her from falling asleep. "I think she was done tolerating being cooped up. When I tried to wrap her back in the blanket after Gibbs left, she started crying. I laid her down and just tucked it around her and she stopped. I think she wanted the freedom to move her arms and legs."
"Stubborn and free spirited just like your mom, huh princess? Well, I guess I can't blame you. Those last few weeks probably felt very cramped."
Chaya finally had enough to eat and pulled away. Ziva handed the baby to Tony for burping and rubbed a little expressed breast milk on her nipples as a nurse had suggested to prevent drying and cracking. Watching her seemed too intimate and Tony turned his focus completely on his daughter. Once she was put back together, Ziva took in her husband and baby with a smile.
"Tony," she said suddenly, "put her down and take your shirt off."
His look was quizzical and he lifted an eyebrow. "Want to cuddle with me Ziva?"
"No." He looked disappointed and she rolled her eyes. "Yes. But that is not why I asked."
She didn't offer any more of an explanation and Tony didn't bother asking. "Okay," he said slowly, setting Chaya on the bed in front of Ziva as he pulled his shirt off.
Ziva started undressing Chaya, speaking softly to her in Hebrew the whole time. Tony caught words like 'beautiful', 'baby girl', 'Daddy' and 'Mommy' and a few others he couldn't pick out as she slid little arms and legs free of the clothes. She gestured for Tony to pull his chair closer and she leaned towards him, placing the almost naked infant on his bare chest. She draped a blanket over Chaya and smiled.
"Lean back Tony, just let her feel your skin and hear your heartbeat." He smiled but still seemed puzzled by what she'd done. The baby's weight was comforting and he relaxed, kissing her soft head. When he looked at Ziva again she could read the question and smiled softly.
"I know you feel left out when I am feeding her," she elaborated. "This is a way to be close to her. Babies thrive on skin-to-skin contact. It is very good especially for early ones."
"You've been doing your homework," Tony remarked, feeling the fast flutter of Chaya's heart.
"I have been reading," she told him, "but Mandy said it first." Then Ziva patted the magazine on the bedside table. "Thank you for the Hebrew one."
He grinned. "You're welcome. I didn't know if you'd have time to be bored but I know you don't like staying in bed."
Ziva rested back against the pillows. "Normally, no. But I am grateful for the extra time to rest." She closed her eyes and Tony had to ask.
"How're you feeling Ziva, really?"
She blinked slowly and smiled. He hadn't seen her smile so much in months. "I am very happy Tony. As much as I did not want her to be early, it is a relief not to be pregnant any longer. I am hoping to soon feel more like myself." Ziva read in his eyes that it was not the answer he wanted and she sighed. "I am tired, my energy is still low and I am sore, but I am okay."
Tony let out a breath and squeezed her hand. "Good enough for now."
When both mother and baby were sound asleep again, Tony wrapped Chaya up as best he could in a couple blankets and returned her to the plastic bin. She squirmed a little and yawned before settling down and Tony thought it was the cutest thing. Realizing he'd forgotten her present, he took the stuffed bunny out of its bag and propped it up in one of the bottom corners. Then he stretched out on the couch and prepared for another catnap.
NCIS
Tony didn't wake until almost nine-thirty that night, when Ziva was just finishing burping Chaya. She smiled at him and pointed to the toy. "I see you found a friend for her?"
He stretched and yawned, making his way over to his chair. "Well, it is her birthday, so she should get a present. I hear it's hard work being born."
Ziva cuddled the baby on her chest and smiled. "It can be Bunny for now," she decided. "Chaya can name it when she is older."
"Fine by me." He eyed the two of them. "I can take her if you have to go to the bathroom or anything."
Ziva sighed and lifted her eyes to his. She was a little tired of always having to let someone else hold her baby. "I have never had something that is mine before Tony, now I have a whole little person."
"We," he corrected gently, "we have our own little person."
Ziva nodded, realizing that he was taking every chance now to be with his daughter, since during the pregnancy she'd had the baby all to herself. "I will have to get better at sharing. Yes," she decided, handing the baby to him, "I will be right back."
Ziva slid out of bed slowly and moved gingerly towards the bathroom. Her muscles felt stiff and sore after being tensed so tightly during labour and the burning sensation when she used the toilet made her put it off as long as possible, even with the peri bottle the nurses had given her. Then pads and underwear had to be changed and she did feel more human after a fresh layer of deodorant and running a brush through her hair.
She returned and found Tony asleep in the chair, still holding Chaya. Her alarm was tempered by amusement and she walked over, whispering his name softly as she gathered the baby into her arms and deposited her carefully in her little bed. Tony jerked, startled out of sleep and immediately tightened his arms even though they were empty. His eyes widened and he sought the clear bin. His breathing relaxed when he saw Chaya sleeping peacefully.
"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry Zi! I don't even remember closing my eyes." Tony rubbed his face. "What if I'd dropped her?"
Ziva touched his cheek. "You would not have. Subconsciously you knew you were holding her." She kissed him. "I trust you." She got back into bed and curled up comfortably. "I love you. Go home."
He frowned. "What? No way! I'm supposed to be here for night feedings and I promised to change diapers and I just-"
"Have not slept since Sunday night," Ziva finished for him. She shook her head. "That is not good for you Tony. You need a proper night's sleep in a bed that is not interrupted every two hours by an infant wanting to be fed."
"You don't want me here?" The insecurity from him sounded like hers and Ziva held out her hand, smiling at the speed with which he grabbed it.
"Of course I want you here," she whispered. "And if these beds were not so small, I would want you laying down with me. But tomorrow everything changes when we bring her home. I need you rested."
He kissed her wrist and sighed in defeat. "Okay."
Ziva smiled. "Good. You can enjoy having the bed to yourself again."
"Not likely," he argued. "It's a whole lot nicer with you in it."
Her eyes got heavier, she couldn't fight sleep much longer. "I love you Tony."
Tony brushed his lips over her forehead and stood up. "I'll see you in the morning."
"Mmhmm," Ziva murmured, already drifting off.
Tony pressed a soft kiss to Chaya's head and slowly walked out the door with his hands in his jacket pockets. A couple nurses at the station giggled at the well recognized look of a husband kicked out for the night as he slowly made his way to the doors.
The clock read 2230 when he got home and dropped his keys in the dish. Too tired to think about food or read the note Abby left on the fridge, Tony dragged himself upstairs, undressed, and collapsed into bed. Pure exhaustion made him drop off immediately but he was awake less than an hour later, reaching for the warmth of his wife that wasn't there.
He sighed and glared at the clock, red numbers glowing innocently. It took only minutes to realize that sleep was going to be elusive now, so Tony put his clothes back on, grabbed his keys and headed for the one place that might offer relief or at least some advice he could desperately use.
NCIS
Gibbs and Celeste were in the basement sanding his boat late Thursday night. Or rather, they had been sanding his boat. But now Celeste's back was against it and Gibbs was pressed in close, savouring the pleasure of not just one kiss, but several, with the woman he was fast falling in love with all over again.
The door slammed, heavy footsteps trod the floor above their heads and Celeste pulled away just as Tony came into view on the stairs. The shocked expression on his face made it clear he'd expected to be Gibbs' only company. "Uhh..." he looked a bit like a deer in the headlights, "I interrupted something. I'm gonna go."
"No Tony," Celeste said in a soft voice, "it's alright. It's time I was getting home anyways." She kissed Gibbs' cheek. "Be nice," she whispered. "He needs a father, not a boss tonight." His glare was not reassuring and she shook her head. "We can finish this another time." The promise of kissing her again softened his features and he nodded.
Celeste slipped past the frozen in place agent and let herself out, still feeling the burn of her ex-husband's lips on hers. The interruption was probably a blessing. She wanted to do things right with Gibbs this time and they had been on their way to getting carried away.
When the front door closed, Gibbs waved at Tony. "Don't just stand there DiNozzo, get down here." Gibbs reached across his workbench for a bottle of water and tossed it at Tony. Giving the new dad bourbon was a bad idea and he needed sleep, not coffee. It would give him something to hold while he thought about talking, if nothing else.
The younger man rolled the bottle back and forth in his hands and leaned back against the solid workbench. "Ziva kicked me out," he reported finally. "Said I should enjoy having the bed to myself." Tony snorted. "She really expects me to fall asleep without her?"
Gibbs picked up one of the forgotten sanding blocks and went back to work. "You haven't been married long enough to want the bed to yourself."
He gave a soft laugh. "Yeah, uh, I don't think I'm ever going to be married long enough for that." Tony slipped one hand into his pocket and pulled out the small cap of Chaya's that he'd taken off earlier in surprise. He didn't remember keeping it. He rubbed it between his fingers, still smelling his daughter on the fabric. Tony sighed. "Is it always going to feel like I left my heart in her hands every time I'm not with her?"
Gibbs stopped what he was doing, memories returning hard and fast. "Yeah," he sighed, swallowing. "After that first time you hold your daughter, she never gives it back."
Tony raised tired eyes to look at his boss and nodded as if a great revelation had just been confirmed. Gibbs left the silence for a few minutes, then finally pointed to the stairs. "Take my room. Easier to sleep somewhere you won't expect to wake up to your wife."
The logic caused Tony to raise an eyebrow, but he decided to take Gibbs up on his offer. When he noticed the pillow and folded blanket on the couch, he realized his boss knew from experience that it was true.