It was, many agreed, the Party of the Century, topping the one that had followed Konoha's founding by several orders of magnitude. Considering the fact that shinobi tended to get a bit wild when they were letting off steam, and the fact that Konoha's unofficial motto was "Go big, or go home", Konoha was lucky to still be standing when the sun rose.

Namikaze Minato groaned as he awoke, rapidly closing his eyes as the morning sun attempted to stab into his brain via his eyeballs. Deciding that he was up for a little bit of morning playtime even despite the hangover, he rolled over, wrapped an arm around his wife and got the shock of his life. The long hair that he could feel tickling his chest and a few other places was there, but there was a decided lack of breast beneath his hand. Opening his eyes despite the fact that daylight would most assuredly sear them, he found himself looking at a head of long and silky BLACK hair.

"Move that hand any lower Minato-kun, and I will use it in an experiment." his sensei's apparently hung over and fortunately very dressed teammate said in a tone of voice that made his blood run cold.

Across Town:

Kakashi blinked when he awoke, and then blinked again. The scenery didn't change. He was apparently in a kennel, and from the warmth and the bellows-like breathing at his back, he wasn't alone. Turning over since the sun wasn't doing his eye any favors, he found himself staring down the muzzle of an Inuzuka nin-dog. As he furiously tried to figure out how and why he was where he was, one of the dog's eyes cracked open, and then the dog reached forward and licked him in what looked like it was supposed to be a seductive manner.

Deciding that he didn't want to know and he never wanted to know, he flew out of the kennel as if the hounds of Hades were on his ass and blew down the street, not giving any of the Genin who were out picking up passed-out shinobi a backward glance.

Elsewhere In Konoha:

When Uchiha Fugaku's stomach tried to escape via his mouth, he simply leaned over and vomited. Sure, Mikoto would probably kill him for vomiting over the edge of the bed and then bring him back in order to clean it up and then kill him again, but if he acted sick enough and maybe coughed a bit, his wife might clean it up and then fuss over him for the rest of the day and bring him his meals in bed instead. It was as he was in the middle of emptying the contents of his rebellious stomach that he began to notice that his bed was unusually hard and scratchy today, and that his puke was taking an unusually long amount of time to hit the floor. A scream of fury caused his eyes to shoot open, whereupon he rapidly absorbed two facts: A. Rather than being in his bedroom, he was leaning over the edge of a roof. and B. A vomit covered Utatane Koharu was standing directly beneath him.

Not good.

In An Undisclosed Location In Konoha:

Danzo frowned. The last thing he'd remembered had been putting an appearance in at that party since, considering who all had been attending, it would've been seen as suspicious if he'd not been there. If only because he should've been there to pause and comment on Hiruzen's drinking habits and those of his students who were somewhere between borderline and full-blown alcoholics and receive a comment from Hiruzen and the little white-haired, loud-mouthed puff-ball who'd grown up to be a giant about how he should get laid in return. Several hours were missing from his memory. Several hours during which he had somehow ended up in bed with Inuzuka Tsume.

As he attempted to extricate himself from the Inuzuka woman's grip, he hissed in pain as several newly acquired wounds on his back decided to make their presence known.

He thought it was supposed to be cats that had claws.

In a Residence That Would Soon Not Be Nearly So Peaceful and Quiet as It Was Very Soon:

Nara Shikaku smirked over at Inoichi who smirked back at him. From what he could see, the arrangements were girl, girl, guy, girl, girl, guy, they'd taken a Hyuuga apiece, and Yoshino didn't have a leg to stand on since she was over on Inoichi's far side. The fact that Inoichi's wife couldn't be found in the immediate vicinity was somewhat worrisome however.

Speak of the devil...

"Good morning dear! Would you like eggs with your breakfast?" Inoichi's wife loudly called from the doorway in a sweet voice with an edge of poison underneath which sent Shikaku into a heart-stopping panic as the women on the bed - one of whom was Uchiha Mikoto - began to wake up.

In the Clan Head's Bedroom in the Hyuuga Compound:

Hyuuga Hiashi blinked when he awoke to find his mirror-image looking back at him. The fact that his brother was in his bed was far less worrisome than the fact that they both were naked. He and his brother had shared a room right up until they had gotten married, and had crawled into each-other's beds often enough that there had been rumors. One didn't share exceedingly cramped quarters for nine months without becoming exceedingly close however. Barring an experiment they both swore to never speak of again, they weren't that close however, and the last time they'd slept together naked had been when they'd taken a nap after stripping down and going for a swim in the koi pond when they were three.

A groan from behind him indicated that his wife was waking up and would soon be asking why Hizashi was in their bed. As his wife shifted behind him and wrapped an arm around his midsection, Hizashi's expression turned from the mild bewilderment that he was sure was a mirror of his own to one of absolute horror. Turning to see what had so frightened his brother, he found himself looking not at his wife who should've been in bed with him, but at the girl who had nearly ripped out his liver for having had the temerity to call her "Tomato" to her face back when they were in the Academy.

"Our wives are going to kill us!" Hizashi said, voicing that sinking feeling that had been coursing through him the moment he'd realized that not only was Uzumaki Kushina in his bed, she was also decidedly lacking in the clothing department.

Five Years Later:

As Hiashi was walking down the street, leading the small timid creature that he kept having to remind himself was his daughter, not "the reason Hizashi died" to a restaurant, something small barreled into him. If it weren't for the fact that it had steel-grey eyes, whisker marks on its cheeks, and was a good bit smaller, he would've had a hard time telling it apart from Neji.

There was a nervous and uncertain look on the face of the guard that had accompanied him that day as the small creature which was dressed in what were obviously hand-me-downs and filthy ones at that fell backwards and landed on its rump. Further investigation had revealed that his and Hinata's guards had usually managed to clear the boy from the area before the two of them arrived. Since the genes for the Byakugan were carried on the X Chromosome - hence why Hinata had been taken - the Uzumaki boy could never be a true Hyuuga, and the clan had hoped to keep him and his immediate family from being reminded of his and Hizashi's "unfortunate mistake".

Seven Years After That:

Neji didn't and probably would never know if the Uzumaki boy was his brother or his cousin, but as far as he was concerned, it didn't matter. Despite the fact that the clan had thrown him aside like garbage as they had done his own father, Naruto - seriously, who names their kid after a ramen topping? - had sided with Hinata. Looking down at the brat who could've passed for a Hyuuga if it weren't for those freakish eyes of his, he prepared to prove to the boy that when one was a loser, they would always be a loser...

Four Years After That:

"Hinata-sama!" Naruto screamed, feeling the Kyuubi's power and wrath rise up from the seal.

Two tails, four, six, eight, far more than his mind could handle and he found himself before the seal holding the flimsy paper that held the doors to the Kyuubi's cage closed. As he began to pull the seal from the bars, a hand moved to stop him. Turning to see who it was, he found himself looking up at the Yondaime Hokage.

He wasn't in the mood to listen to anything the blond had to say however. Hinata-sama had...Hinata-sama was...Because of him, because she had thought of him as family, Hinata-sama had died.

The seal paper made no noise as it slid free of the bars of the Kyuubi's cage.