Hey guys! :)

Firstly i would like to apologise to Nekneknek, I will to try to be extra vigilant from now on, but I can't make any promises!

Secondly I would like to say a huge thank you to everyone who has reviewed! :D you guys are awsome! :D!

Here comes the disclaimer: I am very sad to say that I do not own Victorious

I'm not sure how long I have been sitting here, but my coffee has been cold for at least ten minutes, for the first time in my life I don't want it.

Seeing them together killed me inside, I could literally feel my heart shattering. The few seconds that I witnessed felt more like years, as I watched the only two people I have ever loved together I genuinely felt sick. So I turned and I ran, I ran till my breath was ragged and my chest was heaving, I ran until my physical pain could somewhat match the level of emotional turmoil I was feeling. I never wanted to stop, I wanted to push everything as far behind me as possible, but eventually my body refused to go any further and I collapsed in a bundle under a tree. My emotional pain had won the battle and I was finally forced to give in to my needs and allow myself to cry.

I had lost all awareness of time, my emotions were finally flowing freely; all the tears which I have been suppressing for as long as I can remember heaved themselves out of my body. Together Tori Vega and Beck Oliver had finally succeeded in breaking my carefully put together emotional barrier. Eventually the darkness shielding me subsided and daybreak began. Despite my instincts to stay where I was, I also knew that I couldn't remain here in my current state. Realistically I should have headed home, it would have been the logical thing to do, but for once I didn't want to be alone.

This in itself presented an obstacle; trust has always been an issue for me and whilst I consider both Andre and Robbie to be my friends there is no way I would allow them to witness this side of me. Beck would usually have been the obvious choice, however at this moment in time he was not even an option. Tori was simultaneously the person I wanted to see the least, and the person my heart ached to see the most; but no I would not go to her. That had only left me with one option: Cat, despite her childish ways and her ditzy attitude, she honestly is one of the kindest people I know; and that is why I consider her to be my best friend.

That is how I came to be here, sitting at Cat's kitchen table staring at a cup of coffee that I don't even want to fucking drink. For once in her life Cat is not perky today, it would appear that hung-over Cat is far easier going than her usual self. The two of us have been sat at this table for what I can only assume to have been the best part of an hour near enough in silence. When I had first arrived she had briefly tried to question my appearance, but the tear stains on my face spoke as an answer, she knew I was not 'ok' but she also knew me well enough not to press for an explanation. The fact that I am here has told her that I need her, she knows that I will tell her why when I am ready to; and unlike so many other people this knowledge satisfies Cat and she doesn't push me to talk before I am ready.

The friendship between Cat and I shouldn't work; we are essentially the antithesis of each other, yet somehow we have remained friends since we met aged seven. The trait that she possesses which I most often seek out is her honesty, and in this situation I am once again hoping her views could give me a clearer idea of what I should do.

So far the only two people I have come out too have broken my trust shortly afterwards, and as such the levels of fear running through my system as I prepare myself to give her a full explanation of what has brought me here, are through the roof. Despite my dream a few nights ago, I am still fairly confident that Cat will not judge me, she is without a doubt the most understanding and accepting person I know. I tend to think that innocence is a luxury reserved solely for children; nonetheless I also believe that Cat has retained more of this than anyone else I have ever come into contact with.

"Cat" I start taking a deep breath "When Beck and I broke up it was because I have feelings for someone else."

"I know" she states and smiling gently she continues "it's Tori isn't it?" despite the slight hint of a question in her voice it is clear that she is has a fair amount of confidence in this statement. I am completely blown away, how has this girl whom everyone believes to be so oblivious recognised a fact that I have been fighting so hard to hide?

"Yes" I breathe "it is." Then remembering the events of the previous night I break down once again, Cat tries her hardest to comfort me as I explain the events troubling me. It's impossible to mistake the sheer shock that crosses her face when i round off the tale telling her of the position in which I found Tori and Beck.

"But why would they do that?" Cat bursts out "He is still hopelessly in love with you, and she doesn't want him. Jade trust me please, she was incredibly drunk and probably confused after you unveiled your confession; and I'm not saying that it means she wants you; but she definitely doesn't want him."

"How can you possibly know that?" I ask through my tears, inside I am pleading that the red haired girl is right.

Cat pauses briefly to think before responding

"Not once last night did she look for him last night; and he disappeared fairly early on, surely if she had wanted to be with him she would have tried to check if he was alright?"

Cat's mouth suddenly hangs open and her face illuminates as if she has suddenly been enlightened

"like she did with you!" Cat exclaims, "Jade, as soon as you left the room she followed you, I-I think she does like you!" she stutters with excitement.

Tori did follow me; she did deepen the kiss, she had even tried to push it further, but hell what's to say that wasn't the alcohol talking? Kissing me couldn't have meant her that much if anything to her, why else would she have replaced me with Beck so quickly?

"You need to talk to her Jade. Or at least give her a chance to explain herself" Cat is met with an icy glare from me in response; she knows that I do not forgive easily.

"You're a fool Jade West" is the last thing I hear her mutter as I leave.