A/N: I won't have any time to post this tomorrow morning, so you get it 9 hours early. Thanks so much for sticking with me in the crazy long ride this story has become. Just so you know I'll be away Wed/Thurs but will try to post something Thursday night. Keep the reviews coming, I love to hear what you guys think! You're the best! Love ~Aliyah
When Chaya finished her last pre-midnight feeding at nine pm Thursday night, Tony was all ready with the necessary supplies to give her a bath. They did it on the floor of Chaya's room - Tony washing and Ziva drying, Tony putting on a clean diaper and Ziva dressing the baby in a fresh sleeper. Then they sat in the rocking chair and Tony got out tonight's story - Robert Munsch's Love You Forever.
This time when he finished, Tony stood in front of Ziva. "Three weeks honey, want to try putting her to sleep in the nursery?"
Ziva looked down at the baby and smoothed her fingers over Chaya's brow. "We can try," she said finally. She reluctantly surrendered their daughter to her husband, kissing her cheek. Tony brushed his lips over Chaya's forehead and gently laid her on her back near the bottom of the spacious crib.
She looked so little and lonely all by herself. Ziva disappeared but returned moments later and tucked the mommy blanket around Chaya. She propped Bunny in one corner furthest from the baby and the pink teddy from Jimmy in the other. Ziva smiled when Tony draped the finished yellow blanket she'd made over Chaya and with a final look, she allowed him to pull her away.
They stood outside the nursery feeling a bit bereft. A thought occurred to Tony and he quickly moved the baby monitor from their room into Chaya's and took the other one with him, leaving her door half open. "Let's go downstairs Zi."
The couple cuddled on the couch with a movie playing and changed for bed hours later, more aware of each other now without the baby in their room. Ziva wondered when it was that she got comfortable enough to take her clothes off around Tony and when it had stopped bothering her that he wasn't wearing more than one layer for sleeping.
She did Chaya's night feeding in the rocking chair with Tony close by and put her back down after he took care of burping and diaper change. It was strange to leave the room without her, to go to sleep without the little noises Chaya made and it took Ziva longer than usual to drop off.
NCIS
Ziva woke up in a terror in the wee hours of Friday morning, gruesome scenes from a rare nightmare gripping her heart. Without warning she jumped out of bed and hurried down the hall to the room where Chaya slept. As soon as the anxious mother laid eyes on her baby girl, her heart rate began to slow and she could finally draw a deep breath.
Slowly she approached the crib, her soft steps on the carpeted floor not disturbing the sleeping baby. How long she stood there just staring at her miracle, counting breaths and watching Chaya's eyes move while she dreamed, Ziva wasn't sure. But she wasn't fully reassured all was well until she laid her hand featherlight on her daughter's chest to feel the rapid heartbeat fluttering beneath her fingers.
With a sigh, Ziva barely touched the baby's soft hair, whispering 'I love you' in Hebrew. Tony stood at the door watching his wife with their daughter. He'd been startled awake when she left their bed so abruptly and it had taken him only seconds to realize where she'd probably gone in such a hurry.
Turning, Ziva saw her husband waiting for her. Tony wrapped his arm around her waist, waiting until they were laying back in bed before he asked. "What was that all about?"
She shook her head, closing her eyes against the images that returned like a roaring wind. "I cannot..."
Tony stroked her hair. "Sweetheart, talk to me. Please." It never did her any good when she tried to keep things bottled up inside.
Ziva rolled to her side, burying her face in his neck. "They took her Tony. I screamed and I fought but they ripped her from my body and just...threw her away-" Her words broke off into gasps as she struggled against the tears. "I had to see her. I had to make sure she was here, that she was alright."
Tony closed his eyes, the images something he could see now too. "Oh babe, it's okay." He choked the words out through a closed throat. "You're safe here Zi, I promise I'll keep you and our daughter safe." He fit her against him, his arms holding her firmly, speaking of safety, of being loved and cared for.
After a long time, Ziva's palm found his face. "I love you Tony."
He pressed a kiss to her hair. "I love you too Zi. I will never let you go."
NCIS
Tony called Gibbs an hour before work started to say he'd be in late. He didn't explain, but Gibbs was pretty sure something had happened with Ziva that made him not want to leave her. Tony shut the phone and wrapped his arms around the sleeping body of his wife. He kissed her shoulder and slid even closer, trying not to remember the shards of pain in her voice when she described her nightmare earlier.
Three weeks. They'd gotten a reprieve for three weeks and now the nightmares were back. It had been all Tony could do to get Ziva to leave their baby in the nursery after her last two feedings. She wanted to bring Chaya to bed with them, but he knew that might undo all of their hard work and coaxed her to put Chaya back in the crib.
He knew his wife wasn't sleeping well, Tony hadn't closed his eyes in over an hour, just in case. If Ziva needed him to wake her, he wanted to be ready. Tony didn't want her to have to suffer an extra second of a nightmare if he could help her. He must've dozed despite his intentions because the next thing he knew, their baby alarm clock was going off and Ziva scrambled to get out of his arms so she could comfort their daughter.
Tony was relieved when she brought Chaya back to their room and sat in front of him, making it clear she wanted to be close for comfort. Tony had no problem obliging and settled for rubbing her shoulders slowly while she got Chaya situated. Ziva leaned back against his chest but was far from relaxed.
However, the hormones released by breastfeeding slowly calmed her and by the time Chaya was ready to switch sides, Ziva was able to let him in. "You may help Tony," she said softly, moving Chaya to face the other way. Just like she'd showed him, Tony helped his daughter latch on and kissed Ziva's neck.
"Thank you."
She turned her head, her lips finding his jaw. "I want to give you what I can."
He rested his chin on her shoulder. "Can you believe today was her original due date? I can't imagine being without her this long."
Ziva grimaced. "I am grateful I did not have to spend three extra weeks pregnant." She could only guess how stressful and uncomfortable that would've been. "But it seems like so much longer that we have had her."
Tony chuckled. "We're sure glad you're here princess, Daddy couldnt've waited almost another whole month to hold you."
When Chaya finished eating, Tony took her to get a new diaper but Ziva reappeared in the nursery before he could put the little girl back in her crib. "I need to hold her." Without comment he set the baby in her arms. Ziva glanced at the clock and frowned. "You are late for work."
Tony shook his head. "I'm taking advantage of Gibbs' comp time offer, not going in until noon."
She nodded. "I am glad."
Ziva walked downstairs and settled the baby on her chest, where her nightgown gaped open. Tony chose Old Yellar and sat beside them as close as he could get. They watched animal themed movies for awhile, the next one was Free Willy. After Chaya's next feeding, Tony tried to get Ziva to take a nap too but she shook her head.
"Every time I close my eyes I see it again." Ziva clutched the baby tighter as if someone might at any moment break down the door and try to take Chaya from her arms.
"Oh sweetheart." Tony put his hand on her face. "It was a nightmare honey, it wasn't real. They didn't know you were pregnant and they're all dead now. No one is ever going to take our daughter away." His thumb swiped at a tear and he held her as much as he could without squishing Chaya.
"I know," she sniffed, running her fingers over the baby's nose and eyebrows, "but I cannot get rid of the sick feeling in my stomach every time I think about it."
"Hey," he forced her gaze back to his, "don't do what ifs Ziva, don't. Not with us, not with Chaya, the fear will cripple you if you fall into thinking about what could've happened."
She cuddled back against him without responding and half an hour later she was asleep. Tony gently took Chaya and put her in the bassinet in the kitchen, then rearranged Ziva into a more comfortable position before covering her with a light blanket. He kissed her forehead.
"I love you sweetheart. This is home. You don't have to be afraid any more. I will always keep you safe."
Tony had to rush through showering and dressing and because lunch hadn't even been on the radar, he stopped to grab something on the way. He was later getting in than he'd planned and Gibbs met his eyes with a question but Tony shook his head. No, today Ziva was not okay.
Three hours later Ziva was back in the same position on the couch, holding Chaya while she slept and watching movies about parents with special needs children, the touching stories an excuse to let herself cry. The doorbell rang and Ziva wondered if it was Grace but she got up to check anyways. The identity of the visitor surprised her and she quickly pulled a sweater over her nightgown before opening the door.
"Adrian, what are you doing here?"
He grinned at the baby in her arms. "May I come in?"
Ziva stepped back. "Of course."
Adrian leaned down to kiss Chaya's fist. "How's the little lady doing?"
Ziva smiled. "Very content today." She cocked an eyebrow. "Why did you come?"
He held up a manilla envelope and two albums. "I thought you might like to see how your wedding photos turned out."
Ziva's eyes lit up. "Thank you." She gestured to the couch and sat down beside him. "Show me."
Adrian began flipping slowly through the first album. "These are some of the candid shots I took while you were getting ready and the guys were setting up." He chuckled. "Here's your nervous husband getting told he is not allowed to see you before the ceremony and I love this," Adrian turned the page, "the way Tony looked when your boss's girlfriend asked for the story of how you two met."
"Then we have the actual ceremony. My favourite moment is when a groom clearly sees his bride for the first time. Sometimes the guy cries but the Big D held it together pretty well. There's you when you realized he was singing and that impromptu hug before the Rabbi started talking."
On and on they went. Tony and Ziva in front of the arch holding hands, Ducky waiting his turn to be a witness as they signed the ketubah. Tim handing over the rings, Ziva walking in slow circles around Tony. The kiss, signing the marriage certificate, Tony and Ziva's moment alone after and going for a walk during their yichud time.
Adrian had captured the team together - Abby sitting on McGee's lap, Ducky and Gibbs talking, then Tony and Ziva joining them. Then next album was filled with pictures of all of them in the official family pictures and then the couples separately. One of the last pictures was her and Tony kissing and then Gibbs and Celeste walking towards the car holding hands.
Finally he closed it and smiled. "What do you think?"
Ziva brushed her fingers over the cover, tears in her eyes. "They are beautiful Adrian. I am so happy to have those memories preserved." She glanced at Chaya. "Someday we will show them to our daughter."
Adrian grinned and his excitement reminded her of Tony. "We're not finished yet." He opened the envelope and withdrew two CD cases. "I took several hundred over the course of the day, there are only a quarter of those in the albums." Adrian turned the envelope upside-down carefully and a stack of 8x12 photographs fell out.
"I enlarged some of the ones I thought you might like to frame." He held them up to show her. "You looked so beautiful staring out the window, holding your bouquet as you waited, it was a great shot. So was this one with your boss. He acts more like your dad y'know." It was the moment Gibbs had kissed her cheek before taking her out to Tony.
"The first married couple kiss, everyone loves those, then the official portrait of you guys in front of the arch and one of your entire group." Adrian shrugged. "You can see the rest for yourself but I thought you'd like them.
Spontaneously Ziva leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Everything is amazing, thank you for doing this." She bit her lip. "What do we owe you?"
He held up his hands. "Nope, no way, your money is no good with me." Her eyebrows drew together and Adrian stood, shoving his hands into his jeans pockets. "Your husband saved my butt in college. He woke me up, really changed my life. I'll owe him that debt forever." Adrian pointed to his work. "Those are a gift, please accept them."
Ziva saw how important it was to him. "We will treasure them."
Adrian said goodbye and took his leave after that, and Ziva curled up on the couch again, moving only to change positions and feed her daughter. That was how Tony found her three and a half hours after Adrian's visit and his concern rose. He went to the couch and bent to kiss her, studying her eyes. She stared back.
"What do you see?"
Tony dropped down beside her. "There's still a few shadows. You okay?"
She shrugged one shoulder and then brightened. "Oh, Adrian brought over our wedding photos this afternoon. They are so lovely."
Tony eyed the baby, pretending not to notice how his wife avoided answering his question. "You're kind of hogging her Ninja. Why don't I take her so you can grab a shower?" He'd guessed correctly that she'd barely left that spot all day.
Ziva sighed and agreed. As soon as she was upstairs Tony got comfortable and pulled the first album into his lap. "You won't remember this sweetie, but you were at our wedding. See that bump right there? That's you." He came across a picture of Ziva caressing her belly and sighed. "Your mom is so beautiful princess and you're going to be just like her." He kissed Chaya's head. "You're daddy's best girl, you know that?"
Ziva came downstairs twenty minutes later feeling refreshed and the scene in the livingroom stopped her mid-step. Tony was slouched on the couch, a sleeping Chaya nestled on his chest. Trying to remember where they'd left the camera, Ziva finally found it and snapped several pictures before preparing to wake him up. A knock sounded on the door before she made it to her husband's side and Ziva frowned. They certainly were popular today. Again the person standing on the other side of the door was not who she expected.
"Hello Ziva."
"Celeste." Her expression was curious bordering on wary. "What are you doing here?"
Celeste bit her lip. "I heard through the grapevine that it was a rough night. Would you be interested in going out for tea? Just for an hour or so, I don't want to keep you from your time with Tony."
Ziva opened the door fully. "Take a look."
Celeste grinned at father and daughter sleeping on the couch. "Oh, isn't the precious? Please tell me you took a picture."
She nodded. "I did. They were too cute to resist. Come in. I will put Chaya in her carseat and we can go." Ziva lifted the baby off Tony's chest and kissed his cheek. "Wake up my love, did you have a good nap?"
He jerked awake and swiped at his mouth in case there was drool. Seeing her with the baby, Tony groaned. "Sorry Zi, I didn't mean to fall asleep."
Ziva smiled. "It is fine." She motioned behind her. "Celeste is here, we are going out for tea. Will you be alright without us for an hour?"
He sighed. "I guess I'll live. But I won't have any fun."
Ziva chuckled. "I thought so." Placing a proper kiss on his lips, Ziva knelt and swiftly buckled Chaya into her seat, leaving with a wave. As soon as the car pulled out of the driveway, Tony was on the phone with Gibbs and McGee.
"Celeste is on Ziva detail, you guys got an hour to work on the basement?"
Since Celeste was with Ziva and Abby was busy giving Sammy a bath, both men were free and they pushed themselves hard to do as much as they could in the time allotted. Celeste's text gave them ten minutes warning, so they stopped and McGee left in a hurry. Tony passed the message to Gibbs that Celeste would meet him at his place and then he ran upstairs and jumped in the shower.
When he got out, Ziva was in the nursery feeding Chaya and Tony went to the bookshelf, deliberating about tonight's fare. To his surprise, Ziva didn't put up any resistance to leaving Chaya in her crib for the night and he pulled her out into the hall to kiss her deeply, conveying his relief. They spent half an hour in bed talking before getting comfortable and going to sleep. It had been a long day and Tony wasn't anxious to repeat it any time soon.