Today has been so refreshing; spending time with my friends for the first time in ages, and being able to talk to them without holding anything back. Andre, Dani and Cat were all genuinely amazed that I had kept mine and Jade's relationship a secret for so long and to begin with had seemed mildly hurt; but when I explained everything to them they were so understanding. The feeling was liberating, I don't have to lie constantly anymore. Andre hadn't even brought up the 'bro code' in respect to the fact that Jade is beck's ex; which was somewhat surprising, but I put it down to him just being happy for me.

Beck asked Trina out?

Tori tell her not to go.

You didn't see him earlier,

Something isn't right.

See you later

Love you

Jade xxx

I stare down blankly at my phone screen; mere minutes before we had all been laughing about the fact that Beck had actually asked Trina out. No one could believe it; but I know Trina wouldn't lie about something like that. What could possibly be wrong? I know Jade said things had not gone well with Beck but how could that possibly correlate to him asking Trina on a date? It just doesn't make sense.

What do you mean?

What's wrong?

T xxx

Andre is the first to notice the confusion etched into my face.

"What's wrong Tor? Is Trina already harassing you about what to wear?" He jokes.

"Jade doesn't want me to let Trina date Beck" I state causing all of their head to turn. A bleep from my phone signals to me that she has responded.

Unrequited love is a ridiculous state,

and it makes those in it behave ridiculously.

J xx

I repeat the sentence over and over again in my head trying to make sense of it; until eventually Dani removes my phone from my hands to look at it herself before passing it on the Cat and Andre.

"What exactly happened when she went to speak to Beck?" Dani questions, but I have no answer; she said she would tell me later. But right now later just doesn't seem good enough.

"I have to go." I state bolting upright.

"What now?" Cat questions "Why Tori you told Jade you would be there at 6 and its only 16:50" she looks baffled.

"Something isn't right, something has happened; I need to know what it is, I'm sorry guys." I reply already heading for the door.

"Wait up Muchacha!" Andre calls after me as I head down Cat's driveway, "wouldn't it be easier if I gave you a lift?"

Jade seems surprised at how early I am; but a good sort of surprised. However beneath her smile I can see an element of pain I'm pretty sure that she has been crying.

"Hey beautiful" she says pulling me into a hug and planting a kiss on my lips.

Pulling away slightly I gaze into her eyes and tuck her hair behind her ear before running my hand along her cheek and down her jaw line. "Hey you, are you ok? What happened?"

"I'm fine Tori-" she starts but I cut her off

"Tell me the truth Jade"

"He knows that I'm seeing someone." She states "and he's not ok with it. He said he still thought we would get back together; and that he still loves me. I know he didn't know he was talking about you but the things he said, they got to me Tori, and I-I slapped him." Silent tears are beginning to roll down her cheek and he voice is trembling slightly but I can see she is fighting to stay in control; I squeeze her hand slightly just to reassure her. "He wasn't himself Tor, when I got there he was barely dressed, he was only- err only wearing his boxers. I promise you I really did try to let him get dressed, but he refused! He seemed to think that I wouldn't be able to resist him or something." She spits these venom laced words out. She's right; that doesn't sound like Beck at all. But I still can't believe that she hit him.

Clearing my throat I voice the question that I both need to know and I also don't want to hear the answer to;

"Do you still love him?"

"What? No Tori, I love you! I mean yes I love him but I'm not in love with him!" her face looks pained at the fact that I even asked her that question.

"Then what is wrong? Why are you so upset?

"What you mean other than the fact that the guy I spent two years of my life with, who I thought I could trust; and who I thought would always be there for me can't even bare to look at me anymore?" she snaps, before sighing, "I'm sorry Tori, I didn't mean to shout, I'm just a bit all over the place at the moment. You see the thing is-" she pauses and takes a deep breath looking into my eyes so deeply; I could almost swear she is seeing into my soul. "I would like to be able to advertise my loyalty but I don't believe there is a single person that I have ever loved who I haven't eventually betrayed; Beck included. Until you that is; Tori this; what we have, and how I feel about you, it feels different in every possible way that something can feel different. I would rather die than hurt you in any way. I think that I've loved you since the first time I saw you and you are the one person who has enough power over me to have the potential to ruin my life. But I trust you not to. I trust so much more than I have ever trusted anyone in my life. And that terrifies me." Tears are flowing freely down her face now. "You've made me weak Tori."

I pull her into me stroking her hair and muttering comforting words into the top of her head.

"I don't make you weak, don't you think that; don't you think it for a second. You are Jade West; and you are the strongest person I know never lose sight of that. If anything I make you acknowledge your feelings; but those feelings were always there. I know you Jade and I know that buried inside all of the hate you protrude you care so much; about more people than you would care to admit. You care so much that you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it."

Having both run out of words, our lips find each other in a frenzy, so much has been said; yet so much has also been left unsaid, and we both know we will have to have more in depth discussions like this one. For now however we are both content with losing ourselves within each other.