"Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone? Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone. It's only half past the point of no return, the hour glass on the table, the walk before the run, the breath before the kiss and the fear before the phrase, have you ever felt this way?"
Glitter In the Air
-Pink
Mary moped- more like grieved for all of Sunday and most of Monday morning. Squish was the one who finally convinced her to show her face at work. Delia would have a lot to say, her not showing her face at her best friend's wedding and all. She didn't look forward to the empathetic glances from her new partner, the shoulder touching, the 'I told you so'.
She looked at The Sunshine Building for a while, definitely long enough that she would be logging on late. She would take the scolding from Delia, the fact that she even got out of bed this morning was miraculous, yet alone let go of Norah who wanted nothing more than to cuddle. Unfortunately, Brandi pried her daughter from her hip, breaking Mary's heart, but knowing Squish had only good intentions she didn't spit any venom her sister's way.
As the elevator doors opened, suddenly the weight of the weekend was heavy on her shoulders, everything ached, her arms, her legs, her back, her heart. She wiped away more tears as she entered the WITSEC office.
"I don't want to talk about it Delia." She halted the words coming from the overly excited Inspector, squirming in her office chair, just awaiting Mary's appearance to grill her about her absence at the Chief's wedding.
"About what?" she questioned, her perfectly shaped eyebrows rising in poor cover for her true feelings. She would spend the rest of her day nit picking about, circling her desk, pawing through drawers, making any distracting noise to catch Mary's attention, all a part of her strategy to annoy her to the point of no return so she would crack and divulge the true happenings in the back room of that church. Perhaps Mary was being paranoid, but her paranoia, her little girl and the regrets related to her completely tarnished, ruined relationship with Marshall were all that she had now.
She logged in, rubbing her burning, tired eyes, yawning at the thought of putting any effort in today. Delia looked over, and over again, and then the next second over at Mary again.
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?" Mary hollered.
"Nothingggg, my goodness, you're just all wound up arentchya?" she questioned, sounding somewhat condescending.
"Seriously Delia, what is your problem? You keep taking ganders on over here, spit out whatever the hell you have to say if that will get you to quit your ridiculous gazes in my God Damn direction!"
"Fine. Where the hell were ya during the festivities? I swear you shoulda been there it was real pretty until-
"That's quite enough Inspector Parmalee."
Mary cocked her head to one side, toward the sound of the oddly familiar voice, one she wasn't expecting to hear.
"Errr, um, Chief Mann, I apologize… I didn't-
As Delia began her long, drawn out apology, Mary could only stare, her mouth agape and her bottom lip quivering,
"Marshall?" She questioned disbelievingly, interrupting the pathetic, rough attempts at her partner asking for forgiveness for her gossipy slip.
He ignored her, scolding her partner once more, and then gripping Mary's arm, doing everything but holding back, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of her upper arm, he looked straight into her eyes. He looked exhausted, pale and worn out. His eyes were bloodshot with solemnness and his quiet, pensive presence made the atmosphere around Mary thick and unpleasant.
"I need to speak to you out on the balcony."
"But-
"That wasn't a request. It was an order." He answered coldly, letting the ice in his conviction permeate through her warm, gloss, clearly agonized emerald eyes.
She scrunched her nose at the bitterness in his tone. Suddenly she was guilty, very guilty. That was possibly what he intended, she bit her bottom lip, chewing on it, she hesitantly followed the tense, angry Marshall toward the doors of the balcony. This time, instead of a heartfelt chat, with clear endearing under tones it would be a harsh goodbye, he would tell her, "Pack up your loot, you're being transferred." She could hear it now.
Mary inhaled, her whole body quaking in fear of what was to come. He ran his fingers through his hair, his wrist shaking as he pulled on through his brown locks,
"I- I-
She couldn't look at him, couldn't bring herself to face the hardened, unfortunate version of the Marshall Mann.
"I was standing at the altar my mind everywhere, but on my wedding. I couldn't convince myself that the ceremony was more important than anything you said to me just moments before. Instead of listening to the preacher, reviewing my vows in my brain or my mind wandering off to the absolutely gorgeous woman in front of me, I was thinking about the one woman in my life, who out of some serious lapse in character poured her heart out to me, literally minutes before I was about to take my fiancés hand in marriage."
"Marshall, for- forget about-
"NO! I will NOT forget about it!" He grabbed Mary by the shoulders, shaking her, "Why did you wait? Why did you leave this all for the most inconvenient moment? I spent all weekend resenting you! All weekend! I was supposed to be on my honeymoon, enjoying the few days I could escape you and fall in love with Abigail all over again! But rather than anything going according to plan, I headed out the front door of that church and I'll probably never be able to look that woman in the eye again. Of course that's probably mostly because I confessed everything that happened that night at the bar, every time I couldn't take my mind off of you- I was brutally honest and that she didn't deserve. But I couldn't leave unless she knew I had intentions."
Mary stared at him blankly, confused and slightly terrified by the unfamiliar look sparking in her best friend's pupils,
Tears started to fall,
"Like I said before, what we have is indefinable- so much so, that I leave a woman I love at the altar… I want to know, now that I'm standing here, engaged to no one, weary and heartbroken, do you still love me?"
She finally took a better look, unable to speak; she took the back of her hand to gently wipe away at the tears falling down his cheeks.
"Do you still love me?" he questioned again, "MARY?" he shouted, standing back, his face rosy with frustration, his hands entangled in his hair as he braced himself for the long awaited response.
She froze, terrified, the fear striking her in her heart. "No" was on the tip of her tongue, because like he said a thousand times before today, she was perturbed by commitment, particularly baffled when it came to matters of the heart, a coward when it came to anything along the lines of a developing relationship. She couldn't kid anymore, no matter how much the phrase rattled her to her very core; she could not let the fear take hold of her anymore,
"I love you."
He looked at her. His eyes sparkling, his face softening and a smile appearing on his lips,
"I've waited… countless hours, long days and sleepless nights for you to say that to me Mary Shannon."
"I'm sorry you didn't get to hear it sooner, I don't exactly make things easy Marshall."
"You're also not one to beat around the bush, but you have for almost a decade…" he joked half-heartedly.
"I'm not a catch- I'm not Nancy Drew, I'm and older model, not as pretty- I understand-
"Mary- He touched her shoulder, this time mildly, carefully inching closer, "You're the perfect catch for me-and if I may say so, I for you as well. I make you think, something not many men would dream about attempting, and you're the only woman who has ever stumped me, I have yet to figure you out- you're an anomaly, a vast exciting wonder, like a funhouse- no matter how perplexed you make me feel, I always come back again just for the thrill of it."
"Are we talking crappy carnival funhouse or-
"Just shut up and kiss me." He interrupted, stealing her brashness for a split second- he had been waiting for this ever since he had laid his eyes on Mary Shannon all of those years ago.
As they parted, she snickered, partially because this was where, not even a month ago they had walked away from each other- both finding it just wasn't the same.
"I've never felt this way." She laughed again, somewhat embarrassed by admitting such a thing, and about thinking such cheesy thoughts.
He brushed the hair from her face,
"And neither have I."
(Okie dokie- I'm sorry if it was unbelievable! It's finished. If you have any P!nk songfic requests I'd be more than happy to fulfill them, still working on Funhouse! I hope you enjoyed and thanks for all of your kind reviews! 3 )