Chapter Fifteen: The Truth in the Lie

Fiyero watched Elphaba as she fled back into the palace and bit his lip. His mother cleared her throat and he looked back at her. "Oh, Mother, I shouldn't have done this."

"Done what?"

"Elphaba. She's not… we're not in love. We're not together. This is a lie. We've been pretending. The plan was that we would pretend to be in love, get engaged and when I took the throne, we'd drop the ruse and I'd then find someone I really loved. But I can't lie to you like this." He shook his head. "I'm sorry."

His mother was silent for a moment. "I don't blame you."

"I should've at least told you, though. I just didn't want to marry Sarima. And I dragged poor Elphaba into this because she was kind enough to go along with it. She had her own reasons for wanting to do this, I think, but mostly she did it because she wanted to help me. I guess she couldn't lie to you, either."

She took his hand gently. "Fiyero, I understand."

"This was a disaster. I should never have brought her out here. I should've known you'd see that we weren't in love."

A smile crept into his mother's face, which was probably the last thing he'd expected. "If that were the case, maybe I would've seen it."

"Mother, look, we've been lying about this for so long…"

"Fiyero, you're my son. Maybe I can't read her, though she's pretty obvious as well. But I can read you. And you are in love with that girl, whether you planned it or not."

He buried his face in his hands and admitted, for the first time, what he'd known all along, "I know."

"Then why don't you tell her?"

"Because it's not that simple. She doesn't need this. She doesn't want it."

"The way she looks at you? I think she wants it."

"She made it clear at the beginning she doesn't want a relationship with anyone, Mother. And if I told her, and if we did, what if it went badly? We don't have time to do this."

"Keep lying to your father. I won't say a word. And tell her, Fiyero. You need to tell her."

"I can't, Mother. No matter how she feels, she doesn't deserve to be in this mess."

"That's your decision. But if I were you, no matter how you feel, you might want to catch her before she says anything to anyone else. I want what's best for you, Fiyero, and you need to keep playing this game, for your sake. I don't want to see you become what your father is: cold and distant. And if it's not her, if it's someone else, fine. But maybe you need to think about that, too, because I've never seen you look at someone the way you look at her, Fiyero. That girl is perfect for you, and if you back down because you're afraid, you're making a mistake. Now go after her."

He nodded and got up, dragging himself to the guest suite and hesitating before opening the door. She was sitting on the bed looking helpless. "Elphaba…"

"I'm sorry, Fiyero. She started talking to me and she was just so happy. I couldn't."

He sat beside her. "I know. I told her."

"Good." She took a deep breath. "So this is over, then? I suppose the next few days ought to be incredibly awkward."

"Actually, Fae, I think we need to keep this up. She knows, but she's not going to tell my father. She thinks we're doing the right thing."

"She doesn't mind lying to your father?"

"He lies to her all the time."

Elphaba looked at him sadly. "I guess that's how an arranged marriage works, huh? I can see why you wanted to get out of it."

"My parents… they're not happy. You're right. Watching that, watching how my mother's heart breaks every time my father pushes her away or she realizes he's having another affair, I can't do that. That's why I'm doing this."

"She loves him, doesn't she?"

"She does. I wish she didn't. I wish she could find someone else, too, especially now that I'm older." He sighed. "Look, if you want to come out to my father and tell the truth, that's fine."

"No, no." She grabbed his hand. "If your mother thinks we should keep doing this, she's right. I can lie to your father."

She'd never initiated contact before. He looked at her and saw that she didn't want this to end, and not just because she wanted to help him. Maybe he would tell her, one day when this was over and they had time. But not now. "Thank you. You don't know how much it means to me."

"I do know, Fiyero. That's why I'm doing it." Elphaba smiled warmly at him. "I still don't know why I'm the one you picked, but I suppose I'm glad you did."

"I am, too." He smiled back. Sweet Lurline, he wanted to kiss her, to draw her into his arms and never let her go. His mother was right. He was completely in love with Elphaba. And there wasn't a thing he could do about it.

Their little play held up well enough for the rest of the trip. Luckily, the spring holidays were shorter than any of the others. He could feel Elphaba's patience wearing thin, and he didn't know how much longer she could hold up her end without a break. He was glad he wasn't going to visit her until halfway through the summer – she'd need time to decompress. And maybe he would, too.

"I was thinking that when I visit your family, I might ask your father for your hand."

She'd been watching the terrain pass by through the train windows and turned to him. "It's ridiculous that a man has to ask another man for permission. The only permission a man should need is the woman's."

"I agree with you on that, and it's actually not done that way in the Vinkus. But I think that it would look better if I did it this way. And I could propose to you when we return to Shiz, first thing in the fall."

"You're not going to make a big spectacle out of the 'proposal,' are you?" She cringed.

"No. You always remind me that we're supposed to be ourselves. And I know you wouldn't want a big spectacle. Honestly, neither would I. So I'll give you the ring one day when we're alone and you can tell everyone when you're ready."

"You do know me pretty well," she laughed.

"I like to think so." He kissed her forehead.

She played with her hands. "And then, as soon as we've graduated, you take the throne, right? And this is over?"

"Yes. And I owe you the world. But that's a little over a year away. Don't get ahead of yourself. We haven't even survived this whole year, yet."

"It feels like we've been doing this forever," she murmured.

"It does, doesn't it?" Fiyero bit his lip. "It also feels like it's gone by too fast."

"I can't believe we've lasted this long. I thought I'd have given it away by now."

"You've been very convincing."

"So have you."

They were dancing quietly around the subject, and he knew it. He had to tell her, to just come out with it. Forget how much time they had. It didn't matter. If he couldn't have her, he didn't want to be free, anyway. He kissed her on the mouth, grabbing both her shoulders as he deepened the kiss and feeling her body press against his in response. She grabbed for his shirt, and he opened his mouth to tell her, "Elphaba, I…"

"Fiyero?" She looked up at him with a gaze so intense it startled him into silence. "Please, just this once, just tonight, take me."

He wanted to refuse, knowing that he wanted so much more from her than just one moment, however sweet. But her hands were unbuttoning his shirt and her eyes begged him and he had no power against her. "You're sure that's what you want?" He murmured.

"More than anything."