Learning to Breathe

Disclaimer: "And what do you know about demons?" 1

Author's notes: Time for a progress report… I think we know where this is going, don't we? Told from Zartan's POV.

Chapter Twenty-six: Progressive Reports

The day I dreaded arrived the same as every other. Sure, the alarm ringing at four-thirty in the morning sounded normal, but I knew better. It had been three weeks since the kids moved into their new base, and a progress report had to be given.

"So lovely to hear you have survived three weeks with the little gremlins, Zartan." Destro sneered.

Even when viewed via satellite link, the Scotsman still annoys me.

"Yes, despite a small disease outbreak, we have done well here." I replied.

"So sorry to hear that." Cobra Commander replied. I'll bet he's only sorry that they didn't run off when they came down with Mutant Pox.

"Cut the small talk, we both know what this is about."

Destro sat in shock. The Commander ignored him and continued. "Fine. Start with weapons training. How far are they?"

"Half of them hit the target." I replied. "Golem got his finger stuck in the trigger; Lady Mastermind lacks any confidence or form to work a rifle; and Thunderbird just can't seem to aim the damn thing right."

"What about the other half?" Destro asked as the Baroness ran in. Unfashionably late, as always.

"Chaos has good form, but the sight needs work. Vampira's just the opposite. Atlantis would make a damn fine instructor if it weren't for her temper. Oh, and did Mindbender ever check on that request I sent in?"

"Unknown sample." Cobra Commander said. "Some crazy mutant trying to break into SHIELD. Their files seem to point to a shapeshifter, but nothing definite."

"I see." I nodded. So, the kid's mother is a mutant. Maybe someday, I can meet this woman.

"What about their—ahem—conditions?" The Baroness asked. Cute. Avoid the mutant problem by pretending they're sick. Insensitive slut.

"They are all fine." I smiled. "Atlantis in particular is adjusting very well to her new abilities."

"What about the others?" Destro asked.

"If we were grading them, I'd give them an A-." I answered. "There have been a few setbacks, but those have been overcome. Shadowatch has potential, but not all of them are the same skill levels. That is what we are focusing on out here."

"That will do." Cobra Commander nodded. "Oh, and one more note concerning Atlantis."

I don't know if I like the sound of that. "Yes?"

"Mindbender and Lane" Gods, it sounds like an intersection "have developed an oral form of the serum they're giving her in the injections."

Excellent! Now we won't have to go into the lab unless someone gets hurt.

"Wonderful! How soon can they ship the stuff up here?" I asked.

"We can send it off today, but it will be more like three days before it reaches you." The Commander answered.

"That will be fine." I replied.

"Good!" The Commander hissed. "Remember, the kids come home in two weeks!"

"Understood." I replied before Cobra Commander severed the satellite link. It's a good thing I moved Regan's session back to tomorrow. Somehow, I have to work with the stragglers to make them catch up to the others.

1) Quote from the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, courtesy Mina Harker.