Chapter Thirty: No Regrets

When she walked back in the room, Glinda took one look at her and said, "Oh, thank Oz. You two made up. I thought I was going to literally have to smack some sense into you."

"I told you I was afraid." Elphaba shook her head.

"Are you still afraid?"

"Yes. But… but I realize that doesn't mean I shouldn't try." She gave Glinda a small smile. "You were right. As usual."

"I like to hear that." The blonde stuck her nose in the air. "Look at you, admitting you were wrong, being in love. I like this version of you."

"This version of me?" Elphaba repeated. She liked that. It didn't mean she was someone else, just that maybe there were different parts of her, and she was just discovering them. That made sense.

"You're different with him. Not in a bad way. And he's different with you. He always has been. He's less… introspective. When he first got here, he was so quiet."

"I don't know if that's so much me or if that's just him getting used to everyone now."

"He's happier, brighter. And that is you. You're happier, too, whether you're comfortable with that or not, Elphie."

"I'm learning," she said. "He's better at it than I am."

"You'll get the hang of it. You have the rest of your life." Glinda said dismissively.

The rest of her life? Was it possible she could feel this way forever? Would he really still want her years from now? It sounded wonderful and terrifying. She looked down at the ring on her finger, the one she often ignored because of the implications. Suddenly the idea of being married, the idea of being a wife, it didn't seem so awful. She wasn't sure she could see herself doing it, but it wasn't exactly the most miserable thing she could think of, either.

They returned to Kiamo Ko for the fall holidays, and his mother practically jumped with joy when she saw Elphaba was with him. The two women made eye contact and Elphaba gave her a brief nod. His mother engulfed her in a hug and whispered in her ear, "I knew it."

His father, of course, didn't notice anything, and that was fine with her. But he wouldn't stop pestering them to begin planning their "wedding."

"I told you, Father, we're waiting. Elphaba has a hard class schedule this year and we don't need the distraction." Fiyero repeated.

"He's right. I couldn't possibly handle the idea of putting a wedding together at the moment. I appreciate your concern, Sir, but I need to focus on school."

"I don't see why. You're going to be married. School will do you no good."

"An educated queen could come with me on my trips to the City and to Shiz. She'd be useful in diplomatic matters and trade discussions. It won't hurt."

She smiled at him. That didn't sound like such a bad life, though she realized that wasn't the plan. Maybe it could be. One day. Had she really just thought that? "There are plenty of female dignitaries in Gillikin and Munchkinland. They might react better if there's another woman around."

"After all, the queen should have just as much power as the king. The Ozma regent was female, remember." Fiyero grinned at her.

"I suppose it could be helpful," his father said, defeated.

"You did well back there," Fiyero told her when they both retired to his room. They hadn't spoken about it, but since what her father thought no longer mattered and since they were sleeping together anyway, she'd ended up sharing his room. She'd never spent more than two nights with him at once, but this was a whole week. The idea thrilled her, though she did have some concerns about getting any time alone.

"Thank you. So did you. Do you really think that? That women need to be treated more equally?"

"Absolutely. I mean, it's not great here, but it's far from perfect even at Shiz. Shiz is the only University that allows women, and that's ridiculous. The most intelligent person I know happens to be female." He kissed her nose. "And the fact that you have the smallest library and can't even use the boys' library is stupid, too."

"I'm the most intelligent person you know?"

"By far. You would make a great queen, you know. I don't mean… just an observation."

"I know." But she could feel her cheeks heat at the thought. "You're going to be a great king, though, no matter who your queen is."

"I'll try. I'm going to be on my own for a bit after I take the throne, anyway. At least, I won't be married. Maybe you and I will still be together, but…" He trailed off.

"This conversation is getting a bit uncomfortable," she observed. "Maybe we should leave it for the moment."

"That's a good idea." He was clearly relieved. "Another time."

"Right."

There was a knock at the door and Fiyero got up to get it. "Mother?"

"I just wanted to talk to you two." She smiled at Elphaba. "I noticed you're staying in here."

Elphaba shrugged. "My father did throw me out. What he thinks isn't exactly high on my list of priorities anymore. In fact, it's not on that list at all."

"And you two are… real?"

"Not engaged, but yes." Fiyero wrapped Elphaba in his arms.

She squirmed. "Stop that. You're too much." It felt strange when his mother stood right there. "You were right, Ma'am." She'd been saying that to a lot of people, lately.

"I knew it the moment you two walked in. Elphaba, you kept saying you'd be staying at Shiz over the holidays and I thought that if you were here, it must mean something. And Fiyero, you looked so happy, and not the reserved kind of happy that you had been before. I'm so glad you two found each other."

"It wasn't easy," Fiyero commented. "But she's finally mine. For real."

"I don't belong to anyone," she replied haughtily. But she didn't really mind it, and he knew that. After a moment, she added, "But if I did belong to anyone, it would be you."

"I'll leave you two alone. I just wanted to check in." His mother winked at them on her way out the door.

"She's happy." Elphaba laughed.

"I knew she would be. She's been trying to get us together since she first met you."

"She wants more for you," she said quietly. "She doesn't want you to become your father. It's sweet."

"It's part of the reason I came up with this. I could see how the idea of me marrying Sarima hurt her, but it was my father's decision. That's why I knew I could tell her what we were doing in the first place."

"Your father breaks her heart, doesn't he?"

"Constantly. I hate that she's alone here with him when I'm at school. She's probably so lonely." He sighed, then took her hand. "I'll never break your heart like that. I swear."

"You can't make a promise like that, my sweet. Things can change."

"Not this, not the way I feel. As long as you'll have me, I'll be here."

She crawled closer to him on the bed, unable to stop herself. The safety of his arms, the tranquility, it was just too tempting and she curled up beside him. Maybe he would destroy her one day, but right now she had something she would never forget, and she wanted to take it all in. There would be time for regret later. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love you, too, Fae. Always."