Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin unfortunately.

Ok so here is chapter four but before I start I would just like to say a huge thank you for all of the reviews and story alerts I have received for 'Learning how to live and to breathe'. I really wasn't sure how this would be received and I am really grateful for all of the support, helpful pointers and people pointing out all of the little mistakes I didn't realise I had made. So as usual, please review.

Panic coursed through Merlin as he tried to put as much distance between him and the prince as he could. Not paying attention to where he was going Merlin tripped on one of the spare fire logs, falling to the ground, with tears streaming down his face the young warlock continually whispered "please don't hurt me, please, please don't." Curling his face into the dirt and leaves Merlin panicked, accepting that after all he had been through, this right here, was how he was destined to die.

Arthur was at a loss. Although he didn't share his fathers prejudice views, and he knew that there was something about Merlin that made him more angry, scared and worried than he'd ever been in his life. But the young warlock also made his heart jump in his chest, when they were together Arthur felt comfortable and safe. Looking down at the broken boy on the forest floor, sobbing his heart out Arthur felt his throat tightening, he had done that. Sitting down next to the young boy Arthur pulled him up so that he was sitting in his lap, "Merlin, shhh. Merlin please calm down. Shhh. Please Merlin, shhh." Arthur was worried; he'd never seen someone this distressed before. "Please Merlin, for me. Please, shhh. You have to clam down." Eventually the warlock calmed, and relaxed against the prince's chest, a position that both were completely comfortable with.

"I was going to tell you, I swear. I was going to tell you Arthur. I just… I was so scared." Merlin's voice was frantic as he tried to put across his point. Merlin turned in the prince's lap, wrapping his legs around his waist and pressing his face into the blonde's neck. Arthur tensed at this, expecting a repeat of yesterday and when Merlin's lips began to run over Arthur's neck and his hands found their way under his tunic, Arthur forgot why he'd stopped Merlin before. The heat that coursed through his body as Merlin nipped at his neck was a new experience and one that Arthur could quickly see becoming his favourite. Arthur groaned and pressed the boy's body closer to his, longing for more contact, more heat. "Sire, please." Merlin begged, needing more friction, but the use of Arthur's formal title caused him to gently restrain the boy's wrists between them with one of his large hands.

"Merlin, stop." The young warlock continued to kiss the prince's neck and grinding his erection against the blondes. "Stop Merlin, please." Arthur's voice was strained and at the sound of the blonde's discomfort Merlin stopped and looked at him. Arthur looked at the warlocks flushed face before asking, "Are you doing this because you want to or because you're scared of what I'll do to you now that I know you have magic?" Merlin didn't answer Arthur's question as he didn't know how. He wanted to make Arthur feel good but he wasn't sure why, was it because he was scared or because he liked him?

"I don't know." Merlin replied quietly. "What's going to happen to me now?" he asked quietly, accepting that it most likely wasn't going to be good.

"I'm taking you back to Camelot with me, I'm going to employ you as my manservant and you can sleep in the adjoining room to mine, it's only small as it was originally built as a servant's room. We don't generally let servants sleep in the upper levels of the castle but I don't want anything to happen to you, and you will not, under any circumstances tell or let anyone see you using magic, because if you get caught it will not only be your head on the chopping block it will be mine as well." Arthur said, worrying about how well his plan was going to work.

"But, magic is illegal." Merlin said staring at the prince in disbelief.

"My views are not my fathers, I believe magic to be but a sword, wheedled by the right person a tool to do good, and by the wrong person a weapon to harm many; I don't believe that you are the wrong person Merlin. You have suffered too much in your life to enjoy inflicting pain upon others; you are too good for that." The tenderness in Arthur's voice shocked them both, but Merlin was more worried about his new job as the prince's manservant.

"By Manservant do you mean…" not knowing the words to describe what he meant Merlin reached over and rubbed the blonde's crotch, extracting a moan from his chest.

"Gods no Merlin, I mean washing and cleaning and polishing my armour." Arthur was distraught at the fact Merlin thought he would use him like that. But the rational part of Arthur's brain reminded him that Merlin had never known any different. Embarrassment flushed over Merlin as he realised he had gotten the wrong idea, and Arthur noticing the boy's discomfort automatically tried to sooth him. "Don't worry Merlin; it will take some time to adjust after living like that for so long."

They sat next to each other for a little while longer, Arthur asking questions about Merlin's magic and Merlin either answered them with words of he showed the young prince. Arthur was in awe of the young warlock, Merlin commanded respect the second his blue eyes flashed gold and he couldn't understand why he let himself be abused for years. When he had asked the young man had looked down at his wrists, "Valiant had the help of a sorceress, I don't know her name but she was beautiful; long midnight coloured hair and green eyes and she was dressed like a princess every time I saw her." Arthur bristled at the obvious appreciation that Merlin showed for this woman, but Merlin, unaware of Arthur's distress, continued. "She was cold and unforgiving and when she first looked at me… she terrified me. And she hurt me in a way that no one else could. She created two bracelets, silver and gold with a dragon scale in each, and then she welded them to my wrists. They stopped my magic, and without it… I had no will to even blink most of the time. It was like having a part of me cut out, I could never get comfortable, it always felt as if my skin was crawling and I felt so hollow and empty. She took a part of me that day." Merlin paused, whipping the tears from his face as he shared the last part of his story "I got them off a week ago, I don't know why or how but it was like my magic knew something better was coming and they just fell away, that's where Valiant and I were headed when we ran into you, to get the witch to put them back on." Arthur's mind was reeling; they were in Camelot, they were searching for a witch in Camelot.

"Merlin, you have to promise me that if you ever see her that you will tell me okay, now we have to get going, my 'hunting trip' has already been longer than expected and if we stay any longer then my farther will start to fret."

When Merlin tried to stand he had collapsed back down onto the ground with a howl of pain as many of his cuts were ripped open again, so Arthur soothed him before wrapping him in the cape and hoisting the teen back into his arms where he promptly fell asleep. Arthur knew that he would regret carrying the youth back to Camelot In the morning but at that moment he didn't seem to care as the feeling of having Merlin pressed against his chest was something that he was not likely to give up quickly.

As he strode towards Camelot with the boy in his arms, Arthur's thoughts were not filled of his duties, of Merlin's pain or the impending wrath of his father, he found himself thinking of the different things he could show Merlin. People, places, foods, games, activities and anything else the boy wanted to do and Arthur suddenly realised that he wasn't excited to do these things himself; he just wanted to teach Merlin about everything he missed out on.

As Arthur closed his heavy chamber doors he sighed in relief, trust the day that the prince had reason to be sneaky to be the one day all of the guards were actually doing their jobs.

It was strange seeing the young boy in his chambers after living off only what the forest provided, suddenly having all that they wanted at their fingertips was... Strange. After setting the youth down behind his changing screen Arthur called a few of the maids to fetch bandages, food and a bath. Obviously the servants thought that all of it was for the prince after his hunting trip but all the blonde was having was some food, knowing that Merlin would also be hungry he stopped the closest maid and asked her to fetch double the amount of food, happy knowing that everyone would only think he had missed a couple I meals on his trip.

After all of the servants had left, Arthur locked the door and walked back over to the screen to find Merlin awake, curled into the corner looking frightened and scared; considering the last time Merlin had been conscious they had been in the forest, the blonde could understand his discomfort. "It's okay Merlin, we're back in Camelot and you're in my room. I've had he servants draw you a bath and there is food, which would you like first?" Arthur asked not wanting to make the boy uncomfortable.
"Can I eat first, sire?" Merlin asked, he couldn't ever remember being in a house, the lack of openness was beginning to make the boy feel slightly claustrophobic.

Merlin stood clutching the cloak to his body as he followed Arthur over to the table. At first Merlin didn't really understand, the table was covered in plates and bowels of all different shapes and sizes, full of multicoloured things that Merlin could only assume was food. "I don't know what most of this is." Merlin said feeling very self conscious. Arthur was shocked for a moment before he regained his composure.
"Don't worry, I'll show you." Arthur said pulling him over to the first plate and handing him a green ball "Do you know what this is?" Arthur asked and Merlin raised his eyebrow as if to say 'what do you think?' the prince picked up his own taking a large bite, chewing and swallowing before saying to the boy "This is an apple." Merlin gingerly lifted his own apple to his mouth before taking a small bite, his face scrunched up in distaste but he forced himself to swallow, frowning the entire time. He replaced the apple on the table before whipping his mouth on his arm.
"Bitter." Merlin explained as Arthur laughed, clutching his sides at the expression on his face.
"Apples are a no then," Arthur said his laughter dying off. He handed the brunette a piece of meat and as Merlin took a bite Arthur explained that it was deer. Merlin seemed to enjoy the deer more and the prince came to the conclusion that Merlin and Valiant had lived off what they could get and luxuries such as fruit and sweets could not be afforded. The thought saddened him and he let Merlin have free choice of the food before grabbing his own.

As Arthur sat at the head of the table eating his food, Merlin sat to his right side, a strange look of child-like joy on his face as he explored new tastes and textures; Merlin had recognised bread, all of the meats apart from chicken, potatoes and carrots as well as mint and parsnips. The best moment for the prince had to have been when Merlin discovered strawberries; he was wary of the fruit when he first picked it up, so Arthur, pretending not to notice the boys predicament, picked up us own strawberry and bit into it leaving the green leaves and stalk in his fingers. Merlin watched the prince before copying his actions, Merlin defiantly liked strawberries, he'd groaned low in his throat when he tasted the fruit and Arthur hadn't been able to get the sound out of his head since. "What we these called?" Merlin had asked as Arthur stared at him.
"They're called strawberries." he'd explained and then he watched Merlin try word out on his own lips.
"Strawberries." he said quietly before speaking up "I like strawberries." he exclaimed as Arthur nodded, encouraging the boy to take another, the prince didn't touch the strawberries again that night, he let Merlin finish the plate, getting much more enjoyment from watching the boy eating that he ever could from eating the fruit himself.

Once they had finished eating Arthur walked Merlin over to the tub, supporting him. Arthur was not surprised to find the water had cooled significantly but with a flash of gold in his eyes and a whispered incantation Merlin heated the water to a slightly hotter temperature than Arthur normally bathed in. "Ready?" Arthur had asked, and Merlin had nodded slightly before he carefully folded the cloak and set it down on the side of the tub. Arthur gathered the now naked boy into his arms and gently placed him in the tub. Merlin sighed when the water surrounded his aching muscles when he sunk into the tub.

"You have a lot of scars." Arthur said quietly, looking over the scars that were littering the boy's body. They criss-crossed all over his him. Merlin looked down self conscious of his previous wounds; he'd never had he opportunity to worry over his appearance when he was with Valiant but now sitting next to Arthur he felt somewhat inadequate, underdressed (not literally).
"Valiant use-" Merlin started but Arthur cut him off.
"Now is not the time." Arthur murmured gently handing Merlin a cloth to wash himself with. Merlin started with his legs working his way up to his calves, his groin and then his chest and finally his arms. Arthur moved behind Merlin with some soap as he started to wash and untangle the warlock's matted, dirty hair. After the prince had finished working his way through the knots in the brunette's hair he lifted Merlin up and dried him off with a towel. He then retrieved the salve Gaius had left for his cuts and scrapes, he rubbed it all over Merlin's injuries before bandaging them tightly, allowing them the chance to heal.

"There." Arthur said as he smoothed the last bandage down.

"Thank you, Arthur." Arthur was shocked that the boy used his name but recovered quickly, now realising that Merlin always did what he least expected, the joy, although not shown outwardly, was indescribable; maybe Merlin wanted to be friends too. Merlin's heart was beating wildly when he realised that he had called Arthur by his first name, he didn't understand why but it felt right after everything the prince had done for him. Seeing the look on the prince's face, though, quickly reassured Merlin that he had made a mistake.

After the young boy was wrapped once again in the cloak and sat on the corner of Arthur's bed, the prince strode over to his wardrobe and pulled out one of his sleeping shirts and breeches from about three or four years ago. He helped Merlin pull them on before he stood back to look at the boy; the sleeves were a good thirty centimetres too long and you could have fit two Merlins inside of the body of the shirt. The trousers were just a little too long, Arthur stepped forward rolling both sleeves up before telling him to lie back and sleep.

"But this is your bed, sire." Merlin had protested, but Arthur jus shook his head, disappointed that the boy had reverted back to using formal titles.

"Your room does not yet have a bed, and with your wounds you can't sleep on the floor and unless you mind I can just sleep next to you again." Arthur finished nervously, worried that the only reason Merlin had slept next to him in the forest was for warmth. Merlin blushed looking down.

"I don't mind, sire." Arthur smiled before climbing into the bed and pulling the covers over both of them.

"Goodnight, sire." Merlin whispered quietly. Arthur smiled pulling the young boy flush against his chest, holding them together.

"Goodnight, Merlin."

What did you think, please review and happy New Year. If you spot any mistakes please tell me so I can correct it. Thanks.

:)