Happy BDAY TO MOI
Please answer your opinion on this-I was thinking of NOT reposting Over the Years because I have this amazing new idea that NO ONE has done before, and if anyone will steal it, I will find you, and I will kill you.
Haha, jk about the killing part, but rest is true.
Please review, follow, favorite, and check out my other story(ies)!
P.S. SORRY THIS IS SHORT AND I WILL UPDATE A SUPER LONG 6000 WORD ONE IF I GET 10-30 REVIEWS, I WILL STILL WRITE ONE THOUGH, JUST PLEASE REVIEW AND HELP ME GET TO 380-400!
Chapter XX. Unexpected Confessions
TRIS
The lights come on. I stand alone in the empty room, shaking. I sink to my knees, wrapping my arms around my chest. It wasn't cold when I walked in, but it feels cold now. I rub my arms to get rid of the goose bumps.
I have never felt this much relief in my life before.
Ever.
Not even from my beatings, but this was much worse; facing my deadliest fears that just…
Feel so real.
I can still feel the heavy winds blowing in my face, the walls cramping my body together, the thunderous vibration sensation in my arm when I pulled the trigger, and the whip lashing at me.
I'm just so happy that the fear my mind produces has Marcus as unrecognizable.
But then every muscle in my body relaxes at once and I breathe freely again.
Maybe later on, I might go through my fear landscape in my spare time, just to see if my final fear will disappear, if I can even handle revisiting that hell.
The door opens, and I stand. Max, Eric, Tobias, Jason, and that woman I don't know walk into the room in a line, standing in a small crowd in front of me. Under the leader's expressionless façade, I can still see the shock of my quantity of fears hidden in their faces. Tobias smiles at me.
"Congratulations, Four," says Eric. "You have successfully completed your final evaluation."
I try to smile.
It doesn't work.
I can't shake the memory of the forceful lips on my own screaming ones.- Manage Stories
I can still feel the lashes being whipped at my back.
"Thanks," I say.
"There is one more thing before you can go and get ready for the welcoming banquet," Eric adds.
He beckons to the unidentified blue-haired woman, who hands him a small black case. He opens it and takes out a syringe and a long needle.
I tense up at the sight of it. The orange-brown liquid in the syringe reminds me of what they inject us with before simulations.
And I am supposed to be finished with those.
"At least you aren't afraid of needles," he says. "This will inject you with a tracking device that will be activated only if you are reported missing. Just a precaution."
I gulp. What if Marcus ordered for this to happen?
For me?
"How often do people go missing?" I ask, frowning.
"Not often." Eric smirks. "This is a new development, courtesy of the Erudite,"
At least it's not Marcus.
But it could be one thing.
The war.
"We have been injecting every Dauntless throughout the day, and I assume all other factions will comply as soon as possible."
My stomach twists.
I can't let him inject me with anything, especially not anything developed by Erudite; maybe even Jeanine.
But I also can't refuse.
I can't refuse, or he will doubt my loyalty to Dauntless and make me Factionless.
"All right," I concede, my throat tight.
Eric approaches me in that stalking way of his, and I swear that underneath the dim light, there is a flash of Marcus walking toward me in the same way, holding a belt instead of a syringe.
I shake my head slightly.
It's just simulation daze, I tell myself.
I pull my hair away from my neck and tilt my head to the side.
I stand motionless and look at my feet as Eric wipes my neck with an antiseptic wipe and ease the needle into my skin. The deep ache spreads through my neck.
A brief type of pain that feels so thrilling, and makes your blood rush.
He puts the needle back in its case and sticks an adhesive bandage on the injection site.
"The banquet is in two hours," he says. "Your ranking among the other initiates, Dauntless born included, will be announced then. Good luck."
The small crowd files out of the room-I can hear their rushed whispers-but Tobias lingers by the door, and beckons for me to follow him, so I do.
The glass room above the Pit is full of Dauntless, some walking the ropes above our heads, some talking and laughing rowdily in groups. He smiles at me. He must not have been watching.
Even if he has seen my landscape.
And the reason that I actually passed the fears without much difficulty; successfully passing a living hell in itself, where you must face your deepest fears.
"So…how was your four obstacles?" he asks. "Practically unheard of, my little prodigy."
I blush. "You've seen it before, did you see it this time?"
"Only on the screens. The Dauntless leaders are the only ones who see the whole thing," he says. "They seemed very impressed and shocked, but the thing that shocked me was that Eric suddenly froze during your final fear."
I raise an eyebrow.
I thought he would be laughing, but according to Tobias, it was like it was a memory for him, a painful one.
Did he recognize Marcus?
I hope not.
But then again, the Marcus that my brain created for my fear looks equivalent to an old, tan-skinned Factionless man; but only I could spot out my 'father'.
"I wouldn't be surprised if you ranked first," he says.
We walk into the glad room. The crowd is still there, but it is thinner now that the last person-me-has gone.
People notice me after a few seconds. I stay close to Tobias's side as they point, but I can't walk fast enough to avoid many cheers, some claps on the shoulder which I slightly wince to, and some congratulations.
As I look at the people around me that I call my family, I realize how strange they would look to a normal Abnegation, or any other faction. I realize how normal they seem to me, despite the fact that more than half of the compound is made of more than 60% metal and ink, but it's my new family.
As a Stiff, I was an underestimated abused girl.
As Four, I am a strong, fearless Dauntless prodigy.
And that's how my new family-if I even rank the top ten, which I think I have a chance-welcomed me into Dauntless.
I smile back at them.
We descend the steps into the Pit and Tobias says, "Do you have to go back to the dormitory?"
I shrug.
"Because if you want peace and quiet, you can stay with me until the banquet."
My stomach twists.
It must be hard for him, being afraid of intimacy, but I had to shoot him for God's sake.
"What is it?" he asks.
I don't want to go back to the dormitory, but I don't want to break down crying like Beatrice, I need to be Four.
"Let's go," I finally say.
-o0o-
He closes the door behind us and slips off his shoes.
"Want some water?" he asks.
"No thanks." I hold my hands in front of me, staring at the bruises and muscles I have developed.
Not really, I had much more bruises in Abnegation, but the muscles were grown in Dauntless.
"You okay?" he says, touching my cheek gently. His hand cradles the side of my head, his long fingers slipping through my hair. He smiles and holds my head in place. We sit there for a few seconds, before my temptations overtake me and I kiss him.
Heat spreads through me slowly. His lips still on mine, I push his unzipped jacket from his shoulders, and seems to flinch as it drops to the floor, and pushes me back, eyes burning.
He presses his palms to his face, covering his eyes.
"What? What's wrong?" I ask, already knowing that I went too far and that his fear kicked in instinctively. I feel immediate guilt.
He shakes his head.
"Don't tell me it's nothing." I say, my voice suddenly quite cold. I grab his arm. "Hey, look at me."
He meets my gaze, and I see a look pleading for forgiveness in his eyes, when I realize that his dark blue eyes are just mirroring my blue-grey ones; the look really in my eyes.
"Sometimes I wonder," He says calmly, "what's in it for you. This…whatever it is."
My heart drops to my feet. "What's in it for me," I repeat. I step back, shaking my head. "You're an idiot, Tobias."
"I am not an idiot," he defends. "Which is why I know that it's a little weird that, of all the boys you could have chosen, you chose me. So if you're just looking for…um, you know…that…"
I scowl.
That's the last thing I'd want right now.
I may not be a virgin, thanks to him, but I have a slight fear of intimacy as well, but only with Marcus.
"What? Sex?" I say. "You know, if that was all I wanted, I wouldn't have done it with you," Once I say those words I immediately want to take them done.
I meant that I just wasn't ready, and the thing is, he just knows that I'm a Divergent virgin, but that's what he thinks; my innocence was lost a while ago.
But he looks like I just punched him in the stomach, and he looks away, fending off tears.
My vision becomes blurry with tears. "I'm going to leave now," he says, and turns toward the door.
"No, Tobias," I grab his wrist and wrench him back. He pushes me away, hard, but I grab his other wrist, holding our crossed arms between us.
"I'm sorry I said it like that," I apologize. "What I meant was that you aren't like that, which I knew when I met you, I know about your fear of intimacy, it's just that…" I pause, looking away.
"I know that I am an obstacle in your fear landscape, but you are too, in mine." My lower lip wobbles. "Did you know that?" I say, voice cracking.
"What?" His wrists break free from my hands. The hurt look is in his eyes now. "You're afraid of me?"
"Not you," I say. The tears come again. "I-I had t-to kill you, instead of Evelyn, it's you."
He wraps his arms around me. "B-Tris…"
"But just a question," I say, suddenly curious. "Why are you afraid of me? You know that I would never do that to you," I say, recalling his fear landscape.
"Not you," He says and bites his lip. "Being with you…with anyone. I've never been involved with someone before, and…I don't know what your expectations are."
"Tobias," I say sternly, "I don't know what delusion you're operating under, but this is all new to me too."
"Delusions?" He repeats, then blushes beet red. "You mean you haven't…" He raises his eyebrows. "Oh. Oh. I just assumed… Um. You know."
My heart breaks in two and the memories stab my brain once again.
I break down crying, and crash into his arms sobbing.
"Tris! Beatrice! What's wrong? Tris! Talk to me!"
I stop my sobs long enough to make out, "I-I'm not a v-virgin."
Mini cliffie for you there!
Please review follow, favorite, and check out my other story(ies)!
Goal: 380-400 reviews
I know you can do it Divergenters!
6000 word chapter next if the goal is reached!
The war will happen in two chapters, so it has been suspended because Caleb broke one of the serum computers, so he has to repair that in Erudite for a week or so.
Have any of you seen that chick casted for Marlene?! AND WHO THE F- IS EDGAR?! MARLENE IS A BRUNETTE, NOT A FREAKIN BLOND SUKI WATERHOUSE! AND URIAH HASNT BEEN CASTED YET BUT FREAKING LAUREN HAS, LAUREN, WHOS NAME POPS UP LESS THAN FIVE TIMES IN THE WHOLE F-ING TRILOGY! I HOPE URIAH GETS PLAYED BY THAT GUY.
~TrissyPoo