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Beta-readers: lyingxiscariot (FFnet), FangirlingFanatic (FFnet), and stulti.
Summary: Blaine Anderson is a prostitute whose client is murdered before his eyes. He is thrown into witness protection together with Special Agent Kurt Hummel, whose job is to keep him safe. But, with nosy neighbours and a notorious crime family snapping at their heels, it's not that easy. Especially when feelings get involved.
Warnings: Dub/con, alcohol use, minor OMC death, mention of child abuse, mention of domestic violence, mention of various kinks
Pairings: Kurt/Blaine, Sugar/Artie, Quinn/Puck, Cooper/OFC
Length: 65k; 16 parts altogether
Updates: Weekly on Sundays or Mondays
Chapter notes: I'm very sorry for the late update! On the bright side, you won't need to wait long before the next chapter.
CHAPTER IV: OF HUSBANDS AND NEIGHBOURS II
The pair walked to the large house across the street that was lit up in every window. Only when they reached it, did Blaine realise how nervous he was. He subconsciously glanced at Kurt who gave him a reassuring smile.
"Everything's gonna be fine," he said and pressed the doorbell.
The door opened shortly, and Blaine had to look down because the person in front of them was sitting in a wheelchair. He looked vaguely familiar, but Blaine couldn't remember where from.
"Hey guys, you must be our new neighbours. I'm Artie Abrams, Sugar's husband," he introduced himself, extending his hand.
Blaine shook it with a smile, trying to not show that he had now recognized the famous movie director. "Nice to meet you. I'm Brian. This is Kevin, my wonderful husband."
"It's a pleasure, Mr. Abrams. Thank–" Kurt began but was cut off by the host.
"Name is Artie," the man winked at him. "I'm no 'mister' to friends."
Kurt laughed. "Well, thank you for having us, Artie. Your wife is a sweetheart."
"If that's a synonym for a scary witch then I agree," Artie said. "Let me guess, she didn't give you a chance to say no to the invitation?"
"She didn't, but we would have said yes anyway," Kurt assured him seriously. "We brought wine by the way."
"That she told you to bring?" Artie shook his head and moved back to let them in. "I'd tried to teach her some manners back when we were dating, but later I realised I loved her the way she was. Now I just admire how she gets away with it every single time."
"Must be her charisma," Blaine suggested.
"Must be. Please, close the door and follow me," Artie said and turned his wheelchair.
Soon they found themselves in a spacious living room. There were more than twenty people chatting amongst themselves, and yet the room didn't look crowded. Blaine soon spotted Sugar, who waved at them.
"Hey guys," Artie said loudly, and everyone turned around, "I would like to introduce our new neighbours, who moved in across the street from us yesterday. The one closer to me is Brian and next to him is his husband Kevin. We can interrogate them during dinner, which will be served in five minutes. I'll go check in the kitchen and let you know when we can move to the garden."
With that Artie was gone and Blaine looked nervously at Kurt. He had no idea how they were supposed to proceed. Luckily for them, Sugar was a great hostess and immediately appeared at their side.
"I'm so happy you could make it," she said, giving them short hugs. "And I see you brought wine, thank you very much. It's very thoughtful of you. I'll just put the bottles on the table and introduce you to the people worth knowing."
"You have a lovely house," Kurt said while the woman was busy.
"You haven't seen the best of it yet," she said, and looked over the people who had gathered in the room. "Boring, annoying, stole my silverware last time, old, annoying… Ah, I know, come with me," she said, and led the way to the fireplace. "Kevin, Brian, these are my favourite neighbours, Quinn and Noah Fabray. Guys, Kevin and Brian just moved here."
"It's very nice to meet you," the blonde woman said, sipping red wine.
"Welcome to the neighbourhood. You can call me Puck, everyone does," the man with a mohawk said.
"It's nice to meet you," Kurt said, eyeing the hairdo. "What's the story behind your nickname?"
"Used to be Puckerman before marrying my baby mama," the man explained. "Took her last name."
"Where is Beth, by the way?" Sugar asked, grabbing a glass of champagne from a server who was walking among the guests. "That's their daughter," she added for the new couple's benefit.
"She is with a babysitter. My regular girl couldn't make it tonight, so we will cut the night short this time," Quinn explained hurriedly, and turned back to Blaine and Kurt. "So, are you enjoying the neighbourhood?" she asked.
"Haven't had a chance to explore much yet," Blaine rushed to answer before Kurt could. "You know, christening the new house and all," he said, sending a sultry wink to his 'husband.'
"If by 'christening' you mean cleaning up the place," Kurt said, his cheeks catching fire as the others started giggling.
"I can already see who the uptight one in the family is," Puck laughed, and threw his arm over Kurt's shoulders. "Leave it up to me and I will convert you."
"Noah, you will scare them away," Quinn said, pulling her husband away from Kurt. "Please, excuse him. He can be rather invasive sometimes."
"Only to people I like, and if Sugar likes you two then I like you as well. We'll be best buddies, Kevin, as soon as you get that stick out of your ass." Puck wiggled his eyebrows at Kurt.
"Oh, there were no sticks up there the last time I checked," Blaine said, sliding his hand down Kurt's back and resting it on his ass.
He looked at Kurt, who was shooting daggers from his eyes. He then remembered the ninja stars the man carried with him, and removed his hand before it was cut off. Nobody had a chance to say anything else, as at that moment Artie came back and announced that dinner was ready.
"We'll be eating outside," Sugar said. "Just follow everyone else."
Blaine was about to walk together with the neighbours when Kurt grabbed his hand and stopped him. "What are you doing?" he whispered angrily when the others were far enough away.
"Going outside?" Blaine answered, confused.
"Not that. The whole sex thing."
"I just wanted to act realistically," Blaine retorted defensively. "And couples have sex, right?"
"Realistically doesn't mean acting like a sex crazed maniac," Kurt said, now walking slowly behind everyone else. "Believe it or not, there is difference."
"Oh… Um, I haven't been in a relationship since I was fifteen and my ex talked about sex all the time, so I'm not sure how to… I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."
Kurt sighed tiredly, but didn't look as angry as before. "Apology accepted. Just… no more sex talk."
"I'll do better now," Blaine promised when they entered the garden.
There were lanterns hanging from the tree branches and they lit up the garden with dim light. Four tables were set for six people each, and people were taking seats as if they knew where they would be sitting. Coming closer, Blaine saw place cards and started looking for their seats.
"The damage is already done, everyone thinks that's how we are, so we can keep it up I guess…" Kurt murmured, manoeuvring among people.
"Kevin, Brian, over here," they heard Puck's voice and saw him waving at them. "Sugar rearranged the seats to make sure you join us. Jenny and Michael were boring anyway."
They joined the couple and Blaine found himself sitting between Puck and Kurt.
"They were alright," Quinn argued, but she sounded more polite than convincing. "Sugar let me in on a secret that we are having duck for dinner. Their chef is amazing, by the way, so it's going to be a feast."
"Look, the waiters are bringing food already," Puck said, rubbing his hands hungrily.
Blaine turned around and saw that the man was right, four young waiters and waitresses wearing black and white were bringing numerous plates and distributing them to the guests. As soon as they reached their table, Sugar and Artie joined them.
"I hope you didn't eat anything before coming here, because the duck is to die for," Sugar said, taking a seat beside Kurt. "It's my cheat day, so I might have a slice myself."
"Your diet is ridiculous, darling, you are beautiful as you are," Artie said, rubbing her thigh affectionately.
"I know I am, but I must look even sexier on your next movie's red carpet," Sugar argued. "After Kate got pregnant I became the hottest wife of your cast and crew, but she might get her body back in shape for the premier."
"We'll continue this conversation in private," Artie cut the discussion short when all of them finally had a plate of their own. "Let's dig in."
Blaine looked down at his plate and inhaled the scent deeply. Several slices of duck meat were arranged in a line in the middle of the square plate, while vegetables and bits of orange were scattered around the corners. Blaine had never had anything this fancy on his plate before.
Soon the only sounds disturbing the silence were cutlery tapping the plates and chewing, as nobody dared to disrupt the others' pleasure in the meal. In front of him, Artie tried to silently coax Sugar into eating more than a couple bites, but soon the woman gestured to the waiter to take her plate away. Blaine didn't want to assume anything, so he kept his head down and didn't speak.
"Damn, that was good," Puck said as he emptied the plate and sat back in the chair, rubbing his belly happily. "Beats the lobsters we had last time."
"Your chef outdid himself," Quinn joined the praises.
"Best meal I've ever had," Blaine added truthfully.
"Compliments to the chef," Kurt said, fishing for the last cherry tomato on the plate, which kept rolling away from his fork.
"Let me help," Blaine laughed, and easily stabbed the tomato with his fork. He brought it to Kurt's mouth, but as soon as he opened it, Blaine popped it in his own mouth.
"Jerk," Kurt pouted, unable to suppress a smile.
"And yet you married me," Blaine grinned with his mouth full.
"I was forced to," Kurt laughed, and Blaine followed after catching his eye.
"You two are adorable together," Quinn said after thanking the waiter for taking away her plate. "How long have you been married?"
"Half a year, give or take," Kurt answered. "But we have been together for three years now."
"Best three years of my life," Blaine said, looking at Kurt as a proud husband. "With more awesome years to come."
"Well said," Kurt nodded at him.
"Tell us more about yourself," Artie interrupted them. "We were quite excited to find we are getting some fresh meat on the street."
"Speaking of fresh meat, someone rented the blood house recently. Or so Jenny says," Quinn cut in.
"The blood house?" Kurt asked, visibly disgusted by the name.
"M-hm, you've heard right," Sugar nodded. "The old owner was killed and her nephew has been trying to sell the house for years. I guess renting it is better than leaving it empty."
"Let's not talk about it, I hate thinking about blood," Puck grimaced. "Makes me wanna puke."
"And that's my strong, manly husband," Quinn shook her head.
"Who says that all men have to tolerate blood? I thought your feminist equality bullshit included men's rights too," Puck rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, whatever," Quinn said, checking her wristwatch openly. "It's getting late, our babysitter has to leave in ten minutes, so unfortunately, we have to leave. Kevin, Brian, it was a pleasure to meet you. Sugar, Artie, thank you for a lovely evening."
"What Quinn said," Puck added, and they left.
Artie squirmed uncomfortably. "Quinn and Puck are… going through a rough patch right now," he explained. "It's no big deal. It happens every couple of months or so. They make up and life is good for a while. You just get used to it."
"Dully noted," Kurt said, looking around. "I'll go bring some juice from the drink stand. Anyone want anything?"
"Whatever you're having," Blaine said. "Do you need a hand?"
"I'll manage two glasses, honey," Kurt responded and walked away.
Blaine watched him go and saw someone stopping him to chat as the guests who had finished eating started to mingle among themselves. Kurt glanced back at Blaine, probably to make sure he wasn't being murdered after he had left him with no protection, then returned his attention to the person he was talking to.
"Sugar, look, Cooper tweeted a photo of his newborn," Artie suddenly exclaimed, and Blaine turned back to the man so quickly his neck made a protesting sound.
He saw Sugar gaping at the phone screen. "Aww, it's the cutest baby ever! Look, Brian, isn't he adorable?" she asked, thrusting the phone into Blaine's hands.
He looked down and saw a sleeping baby, wrapped into a blanket burrito, resting on a woman's chest while the man in the corner of the frame took a selfie with them. "Yeah, adorable," he choked out, as his heart suddenly decided to escape his chest.
"Seems the baby got the Anderson genes," Sugar said after she took the phone away from a very reluctant Blaine. "Lucky boy. I'm not saying Kate is not beautiful, but Cooper's face is ridiculously perfect."
"Cooper Anderson is the star of the movie I'm directing, in case you don't know," Artie clarified to Blaine. "He's pretty famous. Awesome guy."
"Um, yeah, I've… heard of him…" Blaine said, trying to get another glance at the photo.
"We took two weeks off filming because his wife was about to give birth some time soon," Artie said, pocketing the phone much to Blaine's disappointment.
"Hey, did he say the baby's name?" Sugar asked, making Artie take the phone out again.
"Let me see," he said, slowly unlocking the phone. "Ah, yes, I haven't paid much attention to the tweet, just clicked the photo. It says: Hey world, meet our precious gem – Lucas Blaine Anderson. Hashtag FutureHeartbreaker."
Upon hearing that, Blaine froze in his seat as the world around him ceased to exist. He'd had no idea that Cooper Anderson's wife was pregnant, but the news didn't shock him as much as the name did.
"Are you okay? Brian? You look… sick," he heard, and looked up to see Sugar's worried face.
"Oh, of course I'm… fine," he tried to smile and failed.
Sugar looked sympathetically at him. "It's probably hard seeing straight couples with kids? Don't worry, there are many ways for you and Kevin to have kids. There is no need to be jealous."
Jealous was the last thing he was. "Sure, you are right. I need… I'll go find Kevin. He's been gone for a while and I'm… thirsty, yeah. Excuse me."
He walked away and the last thing he heard was Sugar's muttered 'must be a sensitive topic'. He needed a distraction and a chat with Kurt, and the new neighbours would provide him just that. He walked up to Kurt, who was now talking to an elderly lady.
"–that's how I learned that toothpaste wasn't good for the tooshie sex. Don't ever do that, you hear me?" the woman said seriously.
"I'll keep that in mind," Kurt promised, nodding fervently.
"Good. You youngsters need to listen to people with experience," she said, satisfied. "My son always dismisses what I tell him to do. Mark my words, he will regret it one day."
"I'm sure he will," Kurt said and let out a sigh of relief when he felt Blaine's arm around his waist. "Ah, Mrs. Lewis, this is my husband Brian."
"Use lube," the woman said, and walked away.
"Making friends?" Blaine asked with a forced smile.
"These people are either insane or intense, or both," Kurt said tiredly. "During my other, you know, cases," he whispered, "people usually were less nosy. Here, everyone wants to know everything and they are all so weird."
"We can stick to those four," Blaine offered, referring to the first four people they had met here. "Chat a bit with others and then pretend we only like Sugar, Puck, Artie, and… what was her name?"
"Fabray?"
"That's their last name," Blaine said. "Whatever, let's get something to drink while we can. Also, you might want to know that Brian wants kids. Don't ask…" he added when he saw Kurt's confusion.
The evening proceeded, and Blaine didn't let Kurt get away from him for a minute. He served as a constant reminder that he was Brian Thompson here, and couldn't let Blaine Anderson's thoughts and feelings take over. They introduced themselves to all the neighbours and even though they only remembered a handful of names, by the end of the evening they felt as if they had done pretty well in their acting exercise.
The guests began leaving close to midnight, and Blaine with Kurt were among them. They went to Artie and Sugar to thank them for making them feel included.
"We are leaving now," Kurt said. "Again, thank you for inviting us. I don't know of a better way to get to know everyone."
"I was actually afraid of moving at first," Blaine admitted, "but you made us feel welcome. We are lucky to have such great neighbours."
"Sugar has an eye for awesome people, so we already consider you friends," Artie said, shaking their hands.
"Say, what are you two doing on Tuesday?" Sugar asked, walking them out. "Whenever my bunny is away for work I get some people together for a book club. And since you love reading and have, well, problems with employment, maybe you would like to join us? Kevin is invited too, of course."
"It sounds like a lot of fun," Kurt said, looking expectantly at Blaine.
"Oh yes, it does. Where is Artie going?"
"He's going back to LA on Monday to finish filming the movie," Sugar said. "So, on Tuesday we will have our first meeting, so bring a book you would like to suggest. The meeting is at three in the afternoon, by the way. Don't be late."
"We won't. Have a good night," Blaine said, going out through the front door.
"Oh, I will," Sugar said with a wink and closed the door.
"The evening was a success, don't you think?" Blaine asked as they crossed the street. "I don't think anyone suspects anything."
"And they won't if you don't talk out loud on the street," Kurt pointed out.
"Sorry, forgot…"
They went inside and Kurt looked at him excitedly. "So, I think you were quite a good husband and deserve to play with my sai swords."
"Actually," Blaine said, when finally the weight of Brian Thompson's identity lifted off of him, "I'm tired. Maybe tomorrow?"
Kurt nodded, visibly disappointed. "Sure. I need to make a call anyway."
"Goodnight then," Blaine said, and without another glance walked upstairs into his new bedroom.
As soon as he got into bed, Blaine was unable to stop his thoughts of the photo he had seen and the memories it had brought. He had deliberately avoided following his famous brother's life and career, and now that the news about his nephew – who shared his name – was thrown at his face Blaine didn't know how to feel.
For years he had thought that Cooper didn't care about him. He never believed him, or pretended not to, when he had told him their father was hitting him and their mother. He'd ignored every plea for help, too busy with his new college life. After Blaine came out, it had only gotten worse. The phone calls got rarer and rarer, and he hardly ever came visiting. And when he did, their dad told him the bruises were from guys who had tried to turn him into a man. Cooper had believed his father over his brother.
It had been years since they had last seen each other, and Blaine had managed to talk himself into thinking that he was fine. That Cooper hated him and wouldn't want to see him anyway. He would probably just ruin his career by showing up in his life – tabloids would have fun writing about the actor's prostitute brother.
Now, however, he wasn't sure what Cooper was thinking. He wondered if it meant that he missed him. Maybe Cooper wanted him back in his life. It could also be a message for him that he was loved and welcome to come back to his family. If only…
Lucas Blaine Anderson… He wished with his whole heart that this tiny human being had a better life than him. And he would do his part in making it happen by staying far away from him.
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