Another chapter for you lovely, lovely people. Yes, you'll get to see Emma's reaction to Neal and maybe a little more of bad ass Emma with Killian trying to be supportive but not too overbearing. I hope you enjoy!
Emma didn't even remember taking her shower, the water not feeling either hot or cold and the towel not leaving a memorable impression either. She made it through the motions, trying not to create statements and imaginary conversations in her mind about how that pending meeting with Neal would go for her. It was hard, as the imagined conversations had played out many times. She had been cruel. She had been forgiving. She had cried. She had laughed. But none of them had ever happened.
"Your imagined response will always be worse than the reality," she muttered to herself, wiping the steam from the mirror over the sink. "It's going to be fine."
She was finishing off the long braid she had fashioned her hair into when she entered the living area of her apartment and saw Killian adding the finishing touches to her breakfast while Ruby and Mary Margaret argued quietly over which one of them should have the pleasure of slapping the man in question. Watching them unnoticed for a moment, Emma took in the sight of Killian's outwardly calm demeanor except for the tense line to his jaw and his hand continually running back through his hair. She had no doubt that he was concerned, not only for her but their relationship. An ex reappearing rarely was a welcome addition. So despite her own qualms about Neal's arrival, she joined the group and placed her hand along Killian's arm and kissed his cheek before settling herself with the breakfast plate that now included fruit, toast, and some sort of jam that she didn't remember having purchased before.
"Better?" he asked. He smelled of her body wash and shampoo, which made her smile at the fact he was that comfortable.
"A shower always helps me clear my head," she said, looking toward the two friends who had brought her the news that morning. "So is there anything else I should know?"
Ruby folded her hands in her best pose to break bad news. "He's staying at Granny's," she said, once again explaining her own surprise over the man's arrival. "And not alone."
"Of course he's not alone," Emma said snidely. Oh sure she had hoped that his existence since their last interaction was a miserable one. What ex didn't think such thoughts and hope for a better life for herself than her former lover? But she was aware of the man he was and that he was never one who lacked for company.
"Her name is Tamera and from the ring she's sporting, I'm saying probably engaged for a few weeks with a destination wedding in the works for spring or summer." Ruby looked proud as Mary Margaret shook her head and mumbled about wasted talent for reading people. "She's attractive, but you know not in a drop dead gorgeous kind of way. If you ask me, she's a step down from you. Her outfit was horrible. I haven't actually talked to her, but I didn't pick up on a sparkling personality either."
"Ruby!" Mary Margaret admonished as Emma lowered her eyes to the cup of coffee and tried to remember if she had already added the sugar. "The poor girl just got into town and is allegedly engaged to a jerk. We should be warning her or at least feeling sorry for her." She made a tsk sound with her tongue until Ruby rolled her eyes in frustration.
"I'm more concerned with having to deal with him than her," Emma admitted. "I don't understand Regina calling him in. This is a bad idea. He is too close to the people in this investigation. He knows me, David, and Graham. How on earth can he be impartial?"
"Regina contacted a firm," Mary Margaret said, relaying what David had told her after the panicked call from Ruby had woken them up. "David thought she'd have better sense but obviously not. He was planning to warn you this morning since you worked so late last night. I told him that I would come over instead."
"I didn't realize…" she had began, her head feeling heavy and her hands wrapped around the cup of coffee that she had been staring into for a few minutes. "I thought he'd stay away. He always swore he'd never come back here as long as his father was still around. I wonder what changed."
"Regina's probably paying him a pretty penny to do this, make it look legit for the voters so that David will win," Ruby declared hostilely. She shot an apologetic glance at Mary Margaret. "Regina is a smart woman and a consummate politician, but the woman has the social graces of an elephant. It wouldn't occur to her that you might not want to have to answer questions from your ex who freaking sent you to jail for a crime he committed."
Killian closed his eyes for a moment, feeling a bit overwhelmed at the information. "Would you like someone to go with you to this interview?" he asked. "I suppose a lawyer might be appropriate or maybe just a friend?" He wasn't sure how Emma was going to do in a stressful situation that was clearly presenting itself.
"I'm fine," she said, a mantra that she had repeated over the years to the point that it no longer sounded convincing to herself. She gave him a smile before turning her face to Mary Margaret. "How's David reacting to this?"
The teacher nodded slowly. "He's not happy about it either. You bore the brunt of Neal's actions, but David was hurt too. He was not looking forward to seeing him this morning." She wrinkled her nose with and squinted her eyes in anticipation for what she needed to say next. "Is Regina aware of who he is? I mean not just Mr. Gold's son, but…"
"Her son's father," Emma said dully. She lifted the mug to her lips and then lowered it again without taking a sip. "I don't think so. When Regina wanted to open communication up with me, I explained I was not in contact with him. His parental rights were terminated after the court couldn't find him and it was declared as an abandonment. His name was not on the paperwork that she received. She didn't seem that interested other than to ask me if he had any mental or physical illnesses that might be hereditary."
Scoffing, Ruby rolled her eyes. "I hope you said that being a selfish bastard is one trait I hope he didn't pass on to your son."
Emma snorted. "I don't think that is hereditary, but I guess when you look at Neal and Mr. Gold and Mr. Gold's own father…maybe it is."
Killian's eyes drifted to the clock on the microwave. "I hate to have you go in there alone, love," he said. "I'm sure I'm not permitted in the actual interview, but what if I just came to the station. I could sit and wait for you?"
"You should get back home and change for work," she told him. "All of you need to just go to work and ignore this for now. I'll go do this interview and try not to punch him. It's fine." To prove her point she placed the mug down with a resounding thump and pushed away from the table. "Maybe we can go have a drink tonight to unwind so I can fill you girls in and we can gossip about how he hasn't aged well and how stupid I was in my youth."
Ruby was already nodding and declaring that they would meet at the Rabbit Hole in her usual and favorite booth. "No excuses," she said warningly to Mary Margaret. "This is mandatory."
The teacher threw up her hands in surrender. "Believe me, after a day of state exams with my class, you better believe I'll be there. I'm dragging David in too."
Killian hesitated at the table, helping Emma to clear away the dishes. "Perhaps I could convince you to at least let me steal you away at lunch? Maybe it would help us unwind a bit after what appears to be setting up as a stressful morning?"
She hesitated, knowing that her instinct was to hide away from everyone after this interview, replaying it in her mind, and being critical of herself for not saying just the right thing. "I would like that," she said. "Now go before I make you wash dishes."
***AAA***
Emma could not see Neal at the desk that was usually occupied by David, but she could tell he was there and hear snippets of the familiar voice. Robin was standing in front of him with his back to the windowed wall.
"You're next," David said, not looking up from the computer that he was staring at. "He's going to interview everyone." There was little emotion in the sheriff's voice as he banged on the computer's keys with his fingers. "I'm sorry. I didn't want her to call him in here. Hell, I didn't even think he'd take the job."
"Not your fault," Emma said. Her hair was braided over her shoulder, a loose and thick style that was a bit more involved than the pony tails she usually wore on work days. She was dressed a little more formally with a dark pair of pants and a button down shirt. Her customary leather jacket was still part of the wardrobe, as were a pair of black leather boots.
"He's not even mentioned anything personal in my interview," David said reassuringly. "I don't know if…"
Emma bit at her lip. "It would be weird if he didn't, right? It would be weird if he pretended like we don't have a history." She ran her hand over a stack of books there on the desk that David was using, knocking them askew and then straightening them out again.
"Very weird," David agreed, sneaking a look at her and softening at how nervous she appeared. "Emma, don't worry. Neal is into self-preservation. He's not going to make himself uncomfortable by bringing up things he doesn't want people to know. After how he treated you, he's got to know that won't make him look good."
She didn't look convinced, but backed away from David's makeshift desk to her own. She was grateful that Ruby and Mary Margaret had stayed through breakfast, though Emma had no appetite after she had to explain to Killian that the arrival of Neal meant that she felt even more judged. The two women seemed to understand that invisible line of panic and pain that seemed to accompany this development even without the added pressure of an investigation. "Did Elsa call?" she asked, hoping that the change in subject wasn't too abrupt for her boss. "She was considering a press conference tomorrow morning to put some word out about the search and how we need people to offer what they know."
David tapped a finger impatiently as he looked around the much smaller desk. "Yes," he said, drawing out the word a bit. "Here it is. Her PR person said noon tomorrow in front of the station."
Nodding, Emma took the post-it note from David and stared at the familiar scrawl. "You going to be there?"
"It's your case," he reminded her. "But if you want me there, I'll show." That was the David she knew, but she also knew his father wasn't as easy going.
"Your dad wants you there?"
He snorted his response and pushed back from the desk to look at her. "My father is a publicity whore who probably would eat it up if I showed up at the press conference – in uniform and looking stern of course. But it's not really my tactic. You're working the case. If you need the press attention to solve it, then go for it. Just tell me what you need from me, okay?"
Emma nodded slowly. "I'll let you know," she added, backing away from the desk and turning to her own. She heard his voice louder then.
"Emma? I'm going to grab some coffee. Are you ready to chat with me about this case?" She cringed inwardly and hoped that her face did not show the sick feeling in her stomach. Inside her head she was already answering that she had nothing to say to him and nothing to add to the discussion, but outwardly she nodded.
"I'll be right there," she said, feeling all of the eyes on her as she walked as steadily as she could into the office that Robin had vacated. Her feet felt heavy and her hands numb as she sat down on the chair and watched him return with the foam cup of coffee that left very little room for the sugar and non-dairy creamer he was throwing in there. He had not looked up at her yet, eyeing his cup carefully instead.
"I should have offered you some," he finally said, lifting the cup and spilling a few drops in the process. His solution was to mop it up with a blank piece of paper rather than search for a napkin or towel. "Can I get you anything? That sounds strange since this is your office not mine."
"I'm fine," she said, repeating the standard line like a mantra. "So what do you need to ask me?"
He smirked, revealing the lines near his eyes that seemed a little deeper to her now. He was still handsome in his casual kind of way. His facial hair seemed more neatly trimmed than she remembered and there was a bit of gray at the temples that she didn't remember from years ago. His eyes still had that way of always looking as though he was smiling, even when his lips were turned downward. "Getting right to it," he said with a little nod. "I guess I can't blame you for not wanting to take a trip down memory lane."
"I assumed you'd be busy," she answered, resting her hands on her knees with a careful perch. "If you'd rather chat, I'm up for that too."
"I have wondered about you," he said, not yet opening the file on the desk between them. He was running a finger on the edges of it. "You seem to be doing okay. Good job. Good life."
Emma did not confirm or deny his assessment. "You know what my life is like?" she asked. "I would think you were too busy to worry about that." She knew she sounded bitter, but there was something about him acting as though his appearance was about her and not job related.
Palms put to her, he tilted his head in concession. "I asked David about all of the employees in the department. Just as part of the investigation, you understand. He said that you were happy, seeing someone I think he said. That's great."
She made a mental note to slap David for making a comment about her personal life to Neal, but kept her face stoic. "I'm happy. I'll be happier when we finish this interrogation."
"Interview," he corrected mindlessly. "It's interesting, isn't it Em?"
She again felt her stomach sour with the use of his nickname for her. "What's interesting?"
"Me and you," he said with a smile as though their names belonged together like peanut butter and jelly. "Both of us went from living in a stolen car to being in law enforcement in a way. Interesting, right?"
She narrowed her eyes. "What is the question, Neal?"
***AAA***
"It didn't feel as good to be rude as I thought it would," Emma said, biting into the slice of pizza. Killian had arrived about 20 minutes after her interview with Neal had ended. His expression friendly as he held her jacket out for her and greeted David with a quick nod and promise that she would be back in time for Elsa's press conference. While she had assumed that he meant to take her to Granny's or one of the little coffee shops turned delis, she had been surprised by his choice.
In the back seat of the jeep was a pizza box that was kept warm by the seat warmer. He had a bottle of soda, two cups, and a container of still hot garlic bread. He'd smiled proudly when she told him it was the best Italian restaurant that she'd ever been to before.
"It rarely is, love," Killian answered, taking a big sip of his soda. "We all have those people in our lives, but their reactions are never what we want them to be."
She chewed for a second, thinking about all the things she had said and what she had wanted to say. "I'm not sure he believes I'm not involved, but I didn't remind him of how crappy it was to leave me to take the rap for him. He didn't bring that up either."
Killian leaned his head back against the seat, brushing a crumb from the corner of his mouth. "Would you want him to apologize for that? I would think that any such attempt would be lacking and not satisfying at all."
"I wanted him to stay gone," Emma said. "I can't believe he sat there and acted like it was just another ordinary day for him. He acted as though I should too." She shook her head. "I am not that strong, I guess."
"I don't think it has to do with your strength, as you are a strong lass, but it's more in terms of heartless. He seems to be quite cold and heartless to not even acknowledge you might have issues with him since his actions sent you to jail."
"I don't really know if there is anything we could say to each other, but I wish we didn't have to say anything at all." She shrugged. "I suppose that I have it coming in a way. I haven't exactly been honest with him either." She bit off another bit of the pizza, holding her hand under it to catch the toppings that seemed to want to fall off of it. He was laughing as she and gravity had their usual fight in such situations, holding out a hand to help her retrieve the falling pepperoni, mushrooms, and peppers.
"About your son?" he asked. He had been careful about the subject with her, recognizing that she was not all that open about the situation.
She nodded, her breath a little labored over the idea. "He didn't know I was pregnant when I went to jail. Hell, I didn't know either. It wasn't until I had been there a few weeks…" She broke off and looked out of the window toward the water in front of them. "It wasn't like he showed up for my court date. He was long gone. I made the decision to go with an adoption without him because I didn't have anyone to call or any way to get in touch with him. David searched for weeks when he found out. Ruth even hired a private investigator who said that he might be in Kansas, but there was not any sign of him. I didn't know how to feel about that."
"I'm sure you were quite distressed," Killian offered. Having never been in such a situation himself, he wasn't completely sure he could understand. However, he was trying to be empathetic.
"I thought I loved him," she said, shrugging. "I thought that he was…I never thought it would end the way it did. I don't want to be bitter over it. I just want to matter to him. I wanted to matter." She blinked. "I was too stupid to see that I did matter to Ruth and to David."
"I can tell you all day long that he's a sodding fool for not seeing how lovely you are and how life is so much better with you than without you, but I don't think my words are going to change anything for you. You don't realize how much people care about you, love. And that is the true shame about all of this."
She craned her head back, pursing her lips. "Why do you even put up with me?" she asked. "I'm sure I'm not your definition of a simple girl you picked up in a bar."
"You're not simple or easy to understand or anything less than a challenge," he said, his voice light and playful. "But you are exactly who I want in my life. And I am so thankful that you have been willing – with some coaxing – to let me be in your life too. Because I like my own life better with you in it."
She smiled, shakily but still genuinely. "We kind of skipped over the everything being happy, easy, and fun stage, didn't we?"
"I don't know," Killian answered. "I'm having a lot of fun being with you. And I'm certainly happy."
***AAA***
Hans sat with his lawyer and another man that Emma assumed was his brother thanks to the family resemblance. He offered precious little in the way of information and Emma knew that the eyes of David, Graham, and Robin were all behind that glass wall to listen in on the interrogation.
"When was the last time you saw Anna?" Emma asked again, changing the wording just slightly.
The man turned to his attorney and seemed to speak with his eyes. "I saw her at the gala at the art gallery. She was there and so was I. We did not speak."
The attorney looked admonishingly at him. "Answer the question. Don't supply other details."
Hans nodded and waited for the next question.
"And how would you say that the two of you got along that evening? Were you fighting?"
Again the man consulted his attorney, straightening his rich blue tie before answering. "We did not speak. I merely saw her there."
Emma tapped her pen on the pad of paper in front of her. David had taught her years before that it was a good idea to carry a pad of paper that she could refer to at all times. She rarely needed the notes she made, but they seemed to be a good diversion while she let a suspect sweat. It was always more dramatic to appear to have already mapped out a situation.
"Forgive me," Emma said, smiling sweetly at Hans, "but I'm confused. You were engaged to Anna?"
"Briefly."
Emma consulted her notes again. "This event, gala, whatever, was in honor of her parents?"
"Yes, they were quite the philanthropists." He smiled coyly at her as if she should know these things even without her law enforcement background.
"Yes, of course, but why would you attend if you didn't even speak to your ex-fiancé. I mean if everything was alright between you?"
"You've been asking the same questions for the past half hour Ms. Swan. I suggest that we end this charade and you should interview a real suspect. After all, you are talking about a missing woman and her fiancé, are you not? I would suggest trying to find them rather than just questioning my innocent client."
***AAA***
Elsa's public relations manager was a strict and hardnosed woman who dictated quite a bit about the next day's press conference. David's participation was not questioned, as she said that his presence was required. Emma would be seated to the other side of Elsa and the two women were to look interested and firm while David expressed the wishes of the department. Each moment was scripted, each possible question and answer vetted.
"That was exhausting," Elsa said to Emma as the woman left them alone. "I would never have guessed there are multiple ways to say thank you for attending."
"I think I'm going to need cue cards," Emma muttered. "I am not good at the memorizing thing."
"Neither am I," Elsa admitted, flipping shut the spiral notebook that she carried with her all the time. She flipped her white blonde hair over her shoulder and exhaled slowly. "I don't know what I'm going to do if we don't find her."
"We will," Emma said, holding her own notes in her hands. "I don't give up easily."
"Good," Elsa answered. "I should go. I know you've got a life outside of this office and this case." She wrapped herself in a warm wool coat that tied around her thin waist. "I'll see you tomorrow, I guess."
Emma wondered for a moment how Elsa felt to be going home alone, her sister missing and no friends that had been spoken of. She almost called out to her and asked her to join the group that night, but she knew that it was unlikely to result in anything good. Everyone had warned Emma and the other deputies to keep cases at arms' length. But Emma could see that same loneliness in now Elsa that she had felt all her life. It was that feeling that if she didn't wake up in the morning that nobody would even care. However, Emma just said good evening and watched the woman walk away.
Elsa was just opening the door and Emma was putting on her scarf when the deputy spoke up. "If you're not doing anything, some of us are getting together for a drink tonight. Maybe you can come along?"
***AAA***
"I think we need to talk, Emma," Ruby said, sliding into her seat next to the blonde as David introduced Elsa to Mary Margaret. "I know you're not gushy or sentimental, but would you care to define this whole Killian thing? You have not pushed him away yet, which is great. Disturbing, but great. So what's going on there? I need to know. I need details."
"Why?" Emma asked, her cocktail sliding down her throat easily. "I don't ask you for details."
"If you wanted to know about my sex life, you just have to ask," Ruby said, signaling the bartender for another drink. "I have no secrets in that area."
"So that means I have to talk to you about all this stuff?" she asked. "You want to know about size, girth, and stamina?"
Ruby shrugged nonchalantly, the lace and leather patchwork top she wore sliding down one shoulder. "And kinks too," she said, looking over at Killian who was in a conversation with Robin. "A man like that must be an animal in the bedroom. And you know I need to hear about that. I mean he clearly makes your toes curl."
Placing a hand over her face, Emma muttered a quick prayer for the conversation to end. "What do you know about my toes curling?" she asked. "I know I'm going to regret this answer."
Plucking the olive out of her martini, Ruby looked toward the ceiling. "Well for one," he said, pointing the plastic sword from the drink toward her, "you have been letting him spend the night. That's pretty big for you. You have been known to pull a fire alarm to get a guy to leave before. And if he's spending the night, then I bet there is cuddling and early morning sex. And then he was in your shower this morning? If we hadn't shown up, would you two have done it on the kitchen table? Ewww…we ate there. Don't answer that."
"Couples cuddle," Emma defended, her cheeks rosy red and drawing the attention of Killian who was looking at her curiously. "I've been known to cuddle." Ruby looked skeptical as she sipped on the gin laden drink. "I have!"
"Sure, sure," she said. "I'm just saying that this morning appeared pretty darn domestic. You making breakfast. Him in the shower. Then him finishing the breakfast prep. I noticed things. Like he knows you prefer the whipped butter to the regular on your toast. Or that you put pepper on your eggs."
"He's observant," Emma said, her demeanor a cross between embarrassed and defensive. "You know we're dating. Why are you asking me these things?"
"Because I want to know his secret," the dark haired beauty said. "He's made you smile and giggle more than any of us combined since we met you. I'd say that he deserves a medal for that."
Emma sighed, leaning back against the vinyl seat that had seen better days. "He makes me smile," she conceded in a quiet voice that couldn't possibly be overheard in the loud bar. "But what do I do for him?"
Ruby flipped her hair over her should, pushing away her now empty glass. "I'd say the effects on each other are mutual. Just mention your name and the boy smiles more than a preteen girl on her way to a boyband concert." Without waiting for a response, Ruby left Emma's side and was calling after David to no doubt butt her nose in there too.
The Rabbit Hole was crowded for a weeknight, but Emma was enjoying her friends' company as they tried to talk about anything but the election, Neal, or the investigation. Having declared so many topics off limits, the group used one of the empty beer mugs to collect a dollar from anyone who broached the subjects even inadvertently. There was Ruby not allowing anyone's drink to be less than half full. There was Mary Margaret trying to teach Emma, David, and Killian dance moves she had seen on television that usually resulted in the four of them bumping into each other in fits of laughter. There was David who was searching on his phone in vain for a picture of Emma wearing glasses, which Killian said he would pay good money to see.
Elsa had been quiet at first, but Robin and his friend Will seemed to be doing a fine job breaking her out of her shell. They took turns telling her funny stories and trying to get her to imitate their accents. Even Killian joined in on that a few times, having recognized Will from the same circles as their shared friends. Ruby's sometimes date, Victor, was regaling the masses with tales of medical school that Ruby kept declaring as disgusting.
"You look beautiful when you smile," Killian told her when they broke away from the group to share a dance on the small and crowded floor dedicated for that purpose. "You have good friends."
"As crazy as they are," Emma said, stealing a glance at Victor trying to teach Ruby some elaborate way to drink a shot that he had learned in medical school, "I'd agree with you on that."
"I'm proud to be a part of your group of friends," he continued, leaning forward a bit.
She considered that for a moment, swaying with the melody of a song she wasn't sure she recognized. "I think," she said hesitantly, "you might qualify as more than that." She looked at him curiously, his face barely apart from her own. He seemed to almost be asking her for clarification and reassurance of what they were together.
"Emma, I'm not a needy teenager asking for a label," he said as if he could read her mind.
"Neither am I, but it is awkward sometimes. And maybe I'm done saying that whatever this is will be over tomorrow." She didn't want to elaborate on that and thankfully he didn't press. "Given that we usually stumble over the term to use when we have to introduce each other, I'm thinking maybe we should come up with something." She laughed at his grin.
"I could think of a few things, love," he said, his fingertips just under the hem of her shirt at her lower back. "What did you have in mind?"
"There is the traditional boyfriend and girlfriend titles," she said, biting back a laugh as he grimaced. Someone behind her bumped into her and she lost her balance, but he kept her upright, arms tightening around her. She had one hand placed on his chest and the other over his shoulder where her hand was at the nape of his neck. A few gentle strokes and he was following her movement like a cat being scratched behind the ears.
"Sophomoric monikers." He sighed as though trying to contemplate a better one. "Partners?"
"We're not a law firm," she argued. "Companions?" Her braid was no longer in place, leaving her hair in waves down her back. She could feel his fingers searching out more of the skin between her top and her pants, occasionally a palm rounding over her curves. She didn't stop him, but she did give him a few warning glances that they both sort of laughed off.
"I'm not your dog or your elderly aunt, love," he said, waggling his eyebrows. "Lovers?"
"That's not how I want to introduce you," Emma said, wrinkling her nose. "So friends?"
"As much as I admire your relationship with Ruby and Mary Margaret, I think that I might appreciate a different sort for us." He leaned his forehead against hers. "So whatever title you choose to give me, I'll accept. How is that?"
"Good save," she giggled. "You're a lucky man, it might even get you an invitation home with me?"
He kissed her lightly, not wanting to attract too much attention or an audience. "I think I quite fancy this bar. It brings me good luck with you."
Thoughts?