He opens his eyes—
No. No… That's not right.
I open my eyes. I open them and take a deep breath of air. It's cold and I roll onto my side. My heart pounds in my chest and I stare at the person across from me. I stare at me. That who it is, isn't it? I think it is. Maybe. My pulse won't slow down. I take another deep breath. I hope that it will settle my nerves. My head feels clearer, but I still can't figure out what's going on.
What is this? What's going on? Why am I here? Why am I there? I press my hands over my eyes, trembling. No, no, no, this is not my home. This is…this is…
Hold on. This isn't getting me anywhere. I move my hands and stare at them. They're shaking. I hug my knees to my chest and bury my face against my legs. Let's start with the basic. Nice and easy.
First? Who am I? What is my name?
I press my face closer against my legs. Name, name, name…
Giegue. That's who I am. My heart leaps and I smile. I'm making progress. I look up and stare at the me across the room. I haven't opened my eyes yet. I crawl across the room and tap the top of my head. I don't move.
Am…am I dead? I look back at my hands and rub them together. I feel pretty solid, but I don't know a whole lot about ghosts and dead people. Maybe ghosts feel solid to themselves. My eyes are locked on me. I can't pull my gaze away.
Stop him, a voice in my head says. Stop him from hurting himself even more.
I'm shivering. Whatever that voice is, it's pretty hard to ignore, so I lean in closer to take a look at me. I'm starting to remember what was going on before I opened my eyes here. I wrap my arms around my head and hug myself. It's curious. I sit there with me in my arms, remembering what I told myself in my head just twenty minutes ago. Don't forget about me. Don't forget about me. Don't forget about me.
Is this really me? I look down at myself. Am I really me? If I'm remembering correctly, Giegue keeps pushing me aside and hiding me away. Suppressing me. I frown and tilt my head to the side. I don't think I'm the sort to do that. Well, I guess I am, but I'm not. I shake my head. This is getting confusing. I pat my head.
"Wake up, Googie," I say, beaming at me.
There's a smile on my face for a second before I open my eyes and remember where I am. Maaaaybe I shouldn't use our nickname right when I'm waking up. I can't be certain, but I think that look of disappointment was because I thought mom was waking me up.
I really need to work on how I refer to me. ….Him. He's him, I'm me, and we're both Giegue. I brush a stray clump of hair away from my face and beam at him. He narrows his eyes. "Go away," he says. His voice is thin and weak. He doesn't
I shrug it off. He's said worse things to me. Of course, I wasn't solid then. I was just him. Am I still just him? I'm not really sure. I think we're still the same, but, if that's the case, what am I doing here? Shouldn't I be in his head again? My heart's pounding again and I am panicking. I keep a smile on my face.
"Oh, but it's so nice here," I say. He pushes himself into a sitting position and glares at me. The clump of hair falls back over my eyes and I twirl it around one of my fingers. "Why do you suppose I have ha-"
"Go. Away."
I tug on the strands of hair. "I'm not leaving."