Pairing: RDR Genre: Angst/Drama Happy END?!: Bitter Sweet, can make a fluff sequel if people vote for it.
WTF?!: Because I wanted to! (
For: My Hubby, you know who you are!
Raphael leaned back in his seat, pulling a long drink for the beer in his hand. He hated the taste, it was sour, bitter, and stank like a road kill skunk's ball sack. But he didn't care. He was drinking whatever he could aford or find. He needed it to kill the pain, to drown out the misery that was wading in on every high tide it could muster.
-"Raph? Um... This is strictly a statistical question but... what do you think about one of us going with another one of us in like a relationship."
Raph looked at Donatello with an odd expression. He never thought about it, it honestly never crossed his mind nor the meer IDEA that someone, let alone Donnie, ask him about it. So he did the first thing that came to mind, "That's fuckin' sick."
Don went quiet then and nodded as if he was processing the data. He just walked away, his steps quiet with his hand on his chin.-
Raph threw his empty bottle across the large run down Dinner he was in. He was a fucking IDIOT! How stupid was he?! Of course that question wasn't stastis... stassticial... for fucking data research!
He outwardly groaned, his deep voice loud enough to bounce the sound around. He couldn't even think right. He was so sloshed that he was certain that if he tried standing up again he would just puke, but still, that image of Donnie in his mind just... haunted him.
-"Don, you okay? You've been avoiding me." Raph leaned against the door frame to the garage, his brother covered in black grease and road grim as he worked.
"Just.. have a lot to do."
"Don." It was a warning tone, the tone he used only when someone was caught lying to him.
"No, I..." Donnie pushed away from the engine of the Turtle Van and seemed to be weighing his options, almost as if this as a good idea to pursue or not. He decided to pursue. "I really do have a lot to do Raph. I don't have a lot of time for anyone."
The emerald turtle frowned. "Why you lyin' ta me Don?"
Donnie just shrugged, no answer just the rise and fall of his shoulders while he looked away.-
Raph watched the condinsation drip off of his newly opened rum bottle, next to it was half a bottle whiskey that he had poured some Jin in just for the hell of it. If he didn't have blood poisoning by now then he was going to drink until he did. At least it was the only way he could figure to get his mind to stop. Stop showing him, stop hearing him, stop rubbing it into Raph's face that he off handedly did the most stupid thing anyone could do. "Fuckin' sick." He mumbled. He stared at the water drops for a while before he felt his chin and bottom lip curl. He rubbed his palms over his face but it didn't stop the whimper that came out of his throat. It didn't sooth the knife of reality that stabbed, stabbed, stabbed at him.
-Donnie started wearing clothing, it started off with gloves, just gloves all over the place. Everyone figured he was so busy that he just used them for every job around. Then he started wearing pants, even to bed. He then started wearing a hoodie, pulling the hood up during practice. He would smile at them from within the shadow of the hood. But to Raph it seemed hollow, empty... disgusting.
One day it was raining, pouring down rain so hard that most of the streets in new york city were empty. It was a perfect time for everyone to go out and enjoy some surface time. They went to a park, some hilly spot in Queens that was always quiet, with the rain it was pratically diserted. They went to a city park that was a little taboo, it was built right next to a grave yard. It didn't bother them though, they were out of the house and they were going to enjoy it!
Mikey grabbed Donnie's sleeve and took him over to the play equipment while Leo and Raph watched. Donnie sat in a swing next to his baby brother and smiled while Mikey just swang up as high as he could manage. Leo leaned over and asked in a hushed tone, "You worried about Don?"
"Yeah." Was all Raph could say. For the first time it looked like Donnie was actually smiling, not playing puppet. "Maybe he needs ta, you know, do somethin' more challengin' for 'im."
"Maybe..." Leo nudged his brother with his elbow. "Have you seen him at night?"
"Not really."
"Me neither, not at his lab, the garage."
"You sayin' he ain't workin'?"
Leo nodded. "Find out what's under his clothing."
"What?"
"He's hiding something. Find out what."
"Why me? He trusts you more."
Leo nearly laughed. "This is Don."
"So?"
Leo looked at Raph surprised, "You serious?"
"What?"
Leo's expression turned dark. "Ffffuu-" He bit his lip before he could cuss. He cleared his throat moving a little away from Raph when Mikey shouted out Leo's name.
"Donnie loves you." Leo took a step away and towards the playground. "I mean it, he loves you."-
It didn't sink in, it hadn't sunk in at all! He knew his brother loved him. He loved Donnie but he didn't think of it in that way!
A hand was placed on the back of Raph's head. He pressed his palms into his eyes trying hard to choke down the sob that made his shoulders quiver. "Shit," he nearly squeeked.
"It's okay," that warm hand soothed and rubbed softly. "Here, drink this." Something cold was pressed against his knuckles.
"No, I-" He let out another sob trying to cap the grief deep inside.
"It's okay, just drink it."
"It's not okay!" Raph nearly lept up, he stumbled a little in his drunken stooper. Donnie, Donnie was right here, right in his hands! He was here! He wasn't in his room with a razor, he wasn't curled up in a ball crying as quietly as possible while telling himself how much of a sick freak he was!
Raph grabbed Donnie's hoodie, yanked it down the zipper busting for the force, he pulled it off and threw it to the ground as if it was the reason behind this, as if it was himself! He shook seeing it all, old and new, fine cuts on shoulders and forarms in faded scars and swollen welts some in patterns some just there. There looked to be so many even though there were probably a few.
His breath caught, his lip curling once more the shock of seeing them in dim light bringing up fresh tears. He looked up at Donnie's face, that sweet angelic face that still looked at him with a smile. He was still trying to give him water to drink. Caring for him... him...
He gripped him hard, Donnie's form nearly squishing in his powerful hug. He was smaller, he hadn't been eating properly. Raph stroked the back of the mechanic's head, tangling his fingers in bandana tails. "You're not a freak, you're not sick," he managed to squeeze tighter burying his face in the crook of his brother's neck. He barely managed to push out, "You're my Donnie."
END!