Hey Divergenters! Sorry for not updating in a long time, I was going back to school shopping.
So I bought galaxy vans! YASSSS
Whoever answers QOTD gets shoutout!
QOTD: Vans or Converse?
AOTD: Vans.
Please review, follow, favorite, and check out my other stories!
Goal: 207 favs, 280 follows, and 463 reviews! I know you guys can do it!
By the way, I don't care what gender you are, I'm calling you dude.
FOURTRIS MOMENT!
Chapter XXII. Stage Two
TRIS
"Welcome to stage two. While the first step many of you have prepared for, nothing could prepare you for this." Four paces in front of us, with his hands behind his back. I gulp.
I thought I was prepared for Dauntless.
But I was just prepared for the physical part.
I shake my head. I can do this.
Then I realize something important.
My Divergence might show.
I finally understand that this whole time, I have not been acting the slightest bit Abnegation. Just nothing but Dauntless. I frown.
I need to step down. Act weaker.
Act more vulnerable.
As much as I hate doing so, I have to. They might already be suspecting me.
They probably are.
"In this stage, your mental courage will be tested. Your worst fears will come to life. This is not a joke," He says, glaring at Peter and Drew, who think something about all of this is comical. I hold back a laugh.
"As I was saying, each of you will be called back. Today you will only get a taste of what challenges this stage presents." His dark blue eyes pass over all of us, everyone avoiding eye contact in fear. I follow so, looking down when the blue orbs pass over me.
"You may as well get comfortable; you're going to be here for a while."
"What's the lowest amount of fears someone has gotten so far?" Peter calls out.
Lauren and the other Dauntless born initiates arrive. They line up in the opposite wall. "In recent years, four."
We all look at Four. That's why he has that nick-name.
After that capture the flag game, I'm certain that heights is one of them.
Four goes back into the room and calls the name of the first initiate.
Lynn goes in first. After about twenty minutes, she comes out traumatized. I gulp.
I'm not sure what fears I have, but I remind myself to start acting weak.
"Uriah."
-o0o-
This continues until I am the last one to go. Everyone else who went before me came out looking scarred and traumatized. They sit against the wall, holding their knees, or curling up in a ball. The whole room is silent. So far, everyone who's went has around fifteen to twenty fears. The door opens. I gulp.
Peter comes out, with a look on his face that makes me want to burst out laughing, but I am too nervous.
"Come on, Tris,"
I stand up. I see Drew stick out his leg for me to trip over, but I step over it. He puts his hand on my shoulder, and chills spark throughout my body. He closes the door behind us. "Sit," he tells me, giving my shoulder a small squeeze, which comforts me.
Instead of looking proud, I act afraid.
I need to tone down, I think. I need to hide my divergence. And I haven't been doing a good job.
I hesitate, looking very nervous, and he gives me a small nudge forward.
"What's the simulation?" I ask. And I don't even need to make myself sound nervous; my voice shakes.
"Ever hear the phrase 'face your fears'? Well, we take that literally," he tells me, typing on the machine. "The simulation will teach you to control your emotions in the midst of a frightening situation."
"Do you ever administer the aptitude tests?" I ask, my curiosity getting the best of me. "No, I avoid Stiffs as much as possible," he replies, his voice a level lower. I frown.
He must have come from Erudite, I think. He doesn't like Abnegation for some reason, I learned that on visiting day.
"Why?" I ask stubbornly.
He looks at me. "Do you ask me that because you think I'll actually answer?" he says. He takes a syringe from a small tray on the table beside it and walks over so he's standing directly in front of me.
"Why do you say vague things if you don't want to be asked about them?" I ask, looking him in the eyes now. He brushes my hair from my neck, and I feel my body tense and my breath stop short for a second. He taps the plunger.
"An injection?" I ask, trying to fake a frightened face, but it comes to me genuinely.
"We use a more advanced version of the simulation here; a different serum, no wires or electrodes for you," Four explains with a nod.
"How does it work without wires?"
"Well, I have wires so I can see what's going on, but for you, there's a tiny transmitter in the serum that sends data to the computer." I relax a little, and he presses the plunger. It doesn't hurt at all, but I wince a little, and try to keep up the façade.
"The serum will go into effect in sixty seconds. This simulation is different from the aptitude test; in addition to containing the transmitter, the serum stimulates the amygdale, which is the part of the brain involved in processing negative emotions-like fear-and then induces a hallucination." I raise a nervous eyebrow at him.
I may have Erudite as a test result but it doesn't mean I am as smart as them.
"The brain's electrical activity is then transmitted to our computer, which then translates your hallucination into a simulated image that I can see and monitor. I will then forward the recording to Dauntless administrators. You stay in the hallucination until you calm down- that is, lower your heart rate and control your breathing." My hands fidget nervously and he looks at me.
He cups his hands around my face and leans in so my nose is touching his. I swear, my heart pounds by the second and my breath hitches.
"Be brave, Tris. The first time is always the hardest," He whispers. I focus my eyesight on those alluring dark blue orbs until I lose consciousness.
FOUR POV
I walk over to the computer and plug myself in. I turn the machine and close my eyes. When I open them, I am watching Tris stand in a field, confused.
A crow caws and latches on to her shoulder. It starts to peck at her shoulder, and she tries to punch it off. Control yourself, Tris. A roll of thunder comes from the sky, and a flock of crows swoops down of her.
She falls over, screaming, as they dig in to her. She is screaming, trying to push them off. "Help!" she screams, "Help!" She falls down and starts to sob, still crying out.
I almost drop my jaw at this. Tris isn't this… vulnerable. She's the most independent, strong, fearless, and brave woman I have ever seen.
It's almost like reality smacked her in the face and she is trying to tone down something.
I frown. I suspected it at first. I am glad that she is acting more… Stiff.
They won't suspect her as much now.
Hopefully.
But I still do.
I guess I'll just have to wait.
I see something gleam in her eyes, and she tightens her body. I watch her breath deep.
We are back in the simulation room. Tris screams and hits her arms repeatedly. Tears well up in her eyes. Her grey-blue eyes have turned dark and stormy. She hugs her knees to her chest. I walk over to her and gently place my hand on her shoulder. She flings her fist on my stomach. "Don't touch me!" she screams, and looks down, hugging her knees tight to her chest.
"It's over," I whisper to her gently. I hesitate for a second, and then shift my hand over her hair, trying to comfort her. She keeps trying to hold back tears and running her hands over her arms.
"Tris," I say. She starts to rock back and forth in the chair. I'm not quite sure what to do, but I know I need to get her out of here.
"Tris, I'm going to take you back to the dorms, okay?" I ask her, and start to help her out of the chair. "No!" she snaps, and glares at me. "They can't see me, not like this," she growls, and wipes the tears from her eyes.
"Oh calm down," I tell her, rolling my eyes. The gentle approach won't work; I need to get to her pride to help her. "I'll take you out the back door," I offer.
"I don't need you to—" she says shaking.
"Nonsense," I reply firmly, and grab her arm. I steer her out of the room and down a hallway. After a while she stops and yanks her arm from my grasp.
"Can you let go of me?" she snaps, and her eyes soften. "Sorry."
I nod. "You okay?"
She frowns and looks down. "I was always prepared for stage one but…" she meets my eyes. "I don't think I can even pass initiation."
There it is.
She hung off the chasm and laughed. She got stabbed and did nothing.
But she faced one of her deepest fears and broke down.
She really is trying to tone it down.
It's good that she finally got some sense knocked in her.
I hope that people will buy it though, and that she will keep it up.
"I'm trying," she says, her lip trembling. "But I failed. I'm failing."
I sigh. "How long do you think you spent in that hallucination, Tris?"
"I don't know," she says, shaking her head. "A half hour, maybe?"
"Three minutes," I reply firmly. Her jaw drops and she gapes at me. "You got out three times faster than the other initiates. Whatever you are, you're not a failure." And hopefully not Divergent.
But it's too late.
She looks confused by my response. I smile a little. "Tomorrow you'll be better at this, you'll see."
"Tomorrow?" she asks, her jaw touching the floor.
I chuckle, and put my hand on her back, continuing to her dorm. "What was your first hallucination?" she asks as we walk, glancing up at me. I frown. "It wasn't a 'what' as much as a who," I say, trying to stay calm. I shrug. "It's not important."
"And are you over that fear now?"
That's the question.
Am I really over him? He made my childhood hell.
I shake my head. "Not yet." We reach the doors. I lean against the wall, and cross my arms.
Tris leans on the wall across me. We are inches apart, just like on the Ferris wheel. As much as I hate heights, that moment was amazing.
I put my hands in my pockets nervously. Tris always makes me nervous. "I may never be," I tell her, and look at the ground.
"So they don't go away?" I think about it.
"Sometimes they do. Other times new fears replace them." My fingers get twitchy thinking about how my fear of heights was somehow brought on, so I look my thumb around a belt loop.
"But… becoming fearless isn't the point. That's impossible. It's learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it; that's the point." She nods, trying to understand the depth of my words. "Anyways, your fears are rarely what they appear to be in the simulation," I tell her. "What do you mean?"
I smile a little. "Well, are you really afraid of crows? When you see one, do you run away screaming?" I ask jokingly, raising an eyebrow. "No, I guess not," she says, and looks down. I think about reaching out and taking her hand. She must have been thinking something similar, because as soon as the words enter my mind, she takes a step forward and tilts her head to the side.
"So what am I really afraid of?" she asks.
"I don't know," I reply. "Only you can know."
"I didn't know becoming Dauntless would be this hard," she says. She is watching me now.
"It wasn't always like this, I'm told," I tell her, and shift my weight so I'm a few inches closer to her. "Being Dauntless, I mean."
"What changed?" She perks up.
"The leadership. The person who controls training sets the standard of Dauntless behavior. Six years ago, Max and the other leaders changed the training methods to make them more competitive and more brutal. They said it was supposed to test people's strength. That changed the priorities of Dauntless as a whole." I scowl.
"Bet you can't guess who the leaders' new protégé is." Tris looks at me, puzzled. "So if you were ranked first in your initiate class, what was Eric's rank?"
"Second." A look crosses her face.
"So he was their second choice for leadership, and you were there first," she says mainly to herself, trying to understand it.
"What makes you say that?" I ask her.
"The way Eric was acting at dinner the first night," She looks into my eyes. "Jealous, even though he has what he wants." I don't respond.
I never told anyone how Max tried recruiting me the day before our final ranks were announced, how he wanted me to work under him and train me to become the next great Dauntless leader, and now this Abnegation girl has figured it out in a matter of days.
Well, she's not so Abnegation.
She sniffs again and wipes around her eyes. I'm worried she will cry again. "Do I look like I've been crying?" she asks.
"Hmm," I sound, leaning in close.
You look so beautiful, so real, I think.
Suddenly she blushes so red that she puts tomatoes to shame, and I realize that I said that out loud.
"W-What?" She stutters, shocked. I feel heat creeping up to my cheeks.
Be Dauntless, I tell myself. Be daring. Take risks.
I take a breath.
"You heard what I said," I say, standing up straight and walking down the hallway in embarrassment.
I turn my head before I round the corner. "Tris?" I say.
"Yeah?" she answers, still leaning against the wall.
"No, it doesn't look like you've been crying." I finally say after a long staring contest. "You look tough as nails."
*So for you not-so-bright people out there, Tris is going to act less badass because she just realized that she is acting WAY too Dauntless, and the word 'Divergent' is basically written on her forehead. So she dials down. And she WILL act a little bit weak and vulnerable; basically more of a Stiff.*
Oopsie, the great and fearless Four slipped! He basically just admitted his little crush for Trissy!
Who am I kidding. HES IN LOVE WITH HER!
HURRY UP AND MAKE A MOVE FOURY!
I thought you guys would like Four POV, I will be doing that in the scenes with Four.
Please review, follow, favorite, and check out my other stories!
Goal: 207 favs, 280 follows, and 463 reviews! I know you guys can do it!
~TrissyPoo