AN: A recount of Jasper's past and why he may understand Bella.

Chapter eighteen: Dead and Buried

Maria, January, 2011...

I walked into my room, barely able to keep my eyes open. My huge bed came into sight and I have never been happier.

Or at least, I have, when John was lying in it with me.

I missed my husband every day. I needed him. Jasper needed him; especially.

John would have liked Bella. I never told anyone. But when I picked her up that day, I think I felt a bit like he had when he brought home with him after he met me at the hospital – an abused young girl with nowhere to go – John must have thought he was crazy.

The thought made me laugh.

Jasper was desperately and speedily falling in love with Bella, and her along with him. We could all see it and loved it.

A major pointer was that I was no longer dealing with Alice Brandon. Clara, her mother, was good friend of mine, but I couldn't stand her daughter. I didn't know where that girl came from because Clara was one of the nicest persons I have ever met.

But that was beside the point.

I crawled out of bed for a quick shower and practically throwing my pajamas on with only one eye opened. I was asleep on my feet.

When I crawled back into bed, I couldn't take my mind off of Jasper and Bella. They had so much in common. But I would allow my son to decide if he wanted to share that with Bella. It was his past and if he felt the need to tell her everything, then, I couldn't stop him.

Nonetheless, I don't think I had ever seen Jasper like this. I have seen him with other girls, even with Alice, but the way he lit up when Bella was around was simply amazing. For me, as his mother, it was like I was seeing my son again. Not that I didn't see him every day, but I was seeing the son he was, the happy boy he used to be, before it happened.

We've never talk about it. Not anymore; not since we told Rosalie. We'd all been to therapy, and it helped me. It helped Rose and John, but I still worry about Jasper to this day.

I know he still had nightmares. I knew he was still dependable; it was why he stayed at the main house sometimes.

Something he hadn't done since Bella moved over to his house. I was happy for that, because Bella's presence was giving Jasper this ultimate purpose, and I enjoyed watching my baby wanting to protect the woman he was falling in love with.

My heart bled this evening as I watched him stand there by Bella's door and again when he collapsed on that last step and cried.

I wanted to rip James' head off. I would kill my ex, Ricky, again if he wasn't already dead. This was all their fault. These two people were beautiful souls who didn't deserve to be corrupted by demons like James and Ricky.

But I had faith that my son and Bella were on the right track. They would heal each other.

Jasper and I had been in deep conversation when we ascended those stairs today, because I learned that Tanya's ex-husband – she filed for divorce after the holidays, and Edward came down from Chicago to defend her – Paul had a deal going with the major corporation that wanted to drill on our land for oil. He would have gotten a substantial amount if he had convinced us to say yes. Jasper was right not to trust him.

Jasper wanted to head to Houston next month and meet with the corporation. And I was in agreement.

But then, Bella happened, and Jasper must have heard something very disturbing after we stopped on our way to his room, when we heard Bella's raised voice.

Jasper's curiosity got the better of him, and I suppose his growing love for Bella was leading him to find out what was wrong.

I know firsthand how protective my son could be. And the lengths he would go. But then again, I suppose his dad and I had taught him that lesson. To John and me, God rest his soul, there were no lengths that we would go to protect our family; even go to prison.

"And what he went through would have cemented that lesson." I thought to myself as I fell asleep.

Jasper was only twelve years old when our lives were forever changed.

Rosalie had gotten home first, but I wasn't worried. Jasper had just turned twelve, and he'd been going on and on about being a big boy now, who didn't need his momma picking him up from every day.

I felt so proud of my boy.

But now, it was getting later and later, and Jasper still wasn't home. It was five pm and John and the ranch hands were out searching for him.

Emmett was home and worried about his best friend.

I was losing my mind and Rose was sad and scared that her brother wasn't home yet.

The phone was busy. Calls were coming in from the family. Everyone was up in arms about Jasper's whereabouts.

A new ranch hand, Sam, had just called me on behalf of John, saying that they still couldn't find Jasper. The police said it had to be twenty-four hours before we could report Jasper missing. I'd been on the phone with Emmett's mother as she tried to keep me calm while all types of scenarios went through my head.

I swore if that boy was playing some type of game with us, I was going to put him across my knee and teach him a lesson he'd never forget. But then again, that wasn't Jasper. He wouldn't do this to us. I knew my boy. He wasn't a rude child. He was well-mannered and obedient.

Something was wrong. I could feel it. Call it mother's intuition, but I felt it. Jasper was in trouble.

I jumped when the door slammed and John came storming into the room. He was furious; he was sad. He was as worried as I was.

I kept Rose close while she lamented, "Mommy, where's Jasper?" The question tore at my heart.

"He'll be home soon, sweetie." I couldn't bear to lie to her, but I had to, for both our sakes.

Sue and little Charlotte stayed with us until the girls fell asleep. Sue and I took them upstairs, letting both girls sleep in Rose's room while John stayed on the phone.

He had left Sam and the others out there to continue the search for Jasper and when I went back downstairs in time to see Sam walk through the door with Jasper's backpack, Sue or John didn't have time to catch before my world went black.

Who had my baby?

~~abt~~

It didn't take long for us to find out who had Jasper. John had spared no expense; the police and private investigators working with us where the best money had to offer.

A larger search was launched and the family, the McCarty's and the Cullens all kept in contact. Rose was scared out of her wits because of all the people coming in and out of the house. And it was only day two.

By the third day, I felt crazy. Jasper had been gone, vanished into thin air for three days now and Rose and I have been crying constantly. She wouldn't eat. She hated to sleep, and she would wake up screaming from nightmares. And that was taking a toll on me.

One day, one of the police officers said the word 'dead' and Rose cried until she fainted.

I nearly ripped him apart. It took two more officers and my husband to take me off the man. I could hear whispers about me, the team trying to convince John to make me seek psychological help.

They didn't understand. I was his mother. I had my son. He was a part of me. I can feel him now, as I did when he was in my womb. If his breath had stopped, I would have known.

All I know was that the one who did this was going to pay a hefty price.

That night, the perpetrator called. All day I had been thinking that it was my fault and it turned out to be.

My ex, Ricky, was the one who took Jasper. He wanted ten million dollars for Jasper or else he'd send him back in pieces to me. Our phones had been tapped by the authorities, and all calls were screened and recorded, but they couldn't pinpoint Ricky's location because he didn't stay on the line long enough. They only knew he was somewhere in Henderson.

John tried to convince me that I was to blame, but I didn't believe that. I felt like shit. I had done this to my son. My past was back to haunt me and kill my child.

After sobbing that to John, I fainted.

Day four was no better. My mind was deteriorating. I slept on the floor of Jasper's room. I wouldn't eat. I screamed at everyone who asked about my wellbeing.

I didn't matter. Only my children did.

I prayed and prayed. I begged God for the life of my child. John prayed with me. He never left my side.

The authorities were at a lost. They couldn't get a good trace on Ricky. One of his calls nearly made my heart exploded. He allowed Jasper to talk to me, but when my baby said he loved me, I could hear Ricky hitting him. John went crazy. I have never seen him so mad. Rose screamed and I begged Ricky not to hurt Jasper.

He laughed at me and hung up.

There were a lot of short calls from Ricky that day. In every one of them, Ricky would constantly say that I betrayed him. That I was seeing John long before I left him, and that I ran away to be with John. When in actuality, I met my husband on a hospital bench, because I ran there, beaten and bloodied. John had simply sat down next to me and the rest was history.

Ricky was just sick. What the fuck was he talking about?

I couldn't go another day and neither could John. He was a damn good hunter and he wasn't about to sit around anymore. I had been hunting with him and I knew John was an amazing shot. When he explained what he had to me, I was in total agreement. So Sam, myself and John went out on our own to search for Ricky and Jasper.

We were going to bring my boy home.

John and Sam had enough to go on. Ricky was in Henderson. He wouldn't stay where he could be seen so it had to be in the woods. I explained what I knew about Ricky's characteristics and that helped. I was to lure him out to them, and my husband would kill him. I had no qualms about that plan.

So early morning on day five, we took a backpack and John's rifle, and left. Our tracking took us on the outskirts of town. By luck or some divine intervention, we found Ricky in a cabin in the woods, just outside of town. John and Sam wanted to wait and plan, but I couldn't. My son was in there. We didn't bring the money, but I was convinced that I could get Ricky out to let John take the shot.

Sam backed off and watched the surrounding area while John and I got closer, I would go in sight so Ricky could see me, and while John hated that, he reluctantly greed so I approached the cabin.

Ricky was shocked to see me. His sinister smile made me shudder. He drew closer, but it wasn't enough for John to take the shot. I had to go in the cabin.

Ricky grabbed my arm and planted his lips on mine. "My, my, look how well you cleaned up, you dirty little slut," he said snidely.

My heart was in my throat but nothing mattered when I saw Jasper huddled in a corner. He was tied to something; his face was battered and bruised. Jasper looked like me when I ran away from Ricky.

Jasper looked like he was starving. He had lost weight. Ricky roughly shook me, but my eyes were trained on Jasper.

Jasper raised his head, smiling meekly at me from his busted lips. "Momma," he said weakly. One of his eyes was swollen shut.

Everything in me was telling me to go to Jasper. But before I could walk over to him, Ricky yanked me back and I was backhanded. John, who wasn't far away, burst into the cabin, and he and Ricky got in a fight while I freed Jasper.

"Momma," he cried.

"I'm here, baby," I sobbed. "I'm here."

A shot rang out, making me spin around in time to see John fall to the ground, gripping his shoulder and groaning in pain. I had gotten Jasper free, before Ricky got his hands on me.

He grabbed my hair and pulled me away. He threw me down on a dirty bed in the corner and got on top of me, pointing his gun to my head.

"One more time, Maria," he said as he choked while grinding his erection into me. "What do you say?"

"Fuck you!"

"With pleasure," he said snidely and roughly kissed me.

I fought back. This couldn't happen to me. Not now. Not ever.

I got the gun out of his hand, slapping it away and he hit me. But this time, I hit him back.

So he started to choke me. John tried to help, but he hit John in his wound making him holler in pain.

Where was Sam? He had to get Jasper out of here.

Ricky and I were wrestling but I was rapidly losing the fight as he held my throat tight. My eyes were blurry, and my breath was short. I was losing consciousness. I could feel my hands growing weak, and my grip on him, loosening.

"No," I rasped. "No..." I could feel the air leaving me, but I swore I heard the faint sound of John's voice saying no.

"No! No, Jasper!" he shouted from faraway as my world was fading into black while Ricky's grip tightened even more.

Suddenly, something wet hit my face and Ricky's grip loosened significantly as he said, "What the..?" and turned around when another shot rang out making something else splashed on my face, before Ricky's dead body collapsed on top of me.

I screamed for help as Ricky's lifeless eyes peered into mine until John pulled his body off of me. I collapsed to the floor, and with the little strength I had regained, I raced to my son's side. "Jasper, what did you do?" John was yelling. "Shit! Shit! Shit!"

"What…what happened?" I asked, confused as I looked between them. Sam came barging into the cabin and John sent him back out.

"He shot him," was all John said.

A look passed between John and I while Jasper stood there, his eyes dead. John wiped down the gun clean, and then gripped it, rubbing his own print all over it. I called Sam back in and told him to call the authorities. He nodded and left.

Jasper killed Ricky for me and for what he did to him, but my boy will never be punished for it.

John and I made sure of it.

I got my son back that day, but not without the demons that now plagued him. My child was forever changed by the events that took place and until this day, I still think Jasper hasn't told me all that happened to him.

But I will be here wherever he was ready to.

John had sworn us to secrecy by the time the authorities caught up to us. I held Jasper to me like he was a baby. And Sam kept quiet about whatever he may suspect until this day.

I couldn't be more thankful for him.

John took the blame for Ricky's demise. He said it was self-defense as Ricky had attacked us and I backed my husband up.

After everything died down, John suggested therapy for Jasper and me. He even came along for a few sessions with me. But Jasper's was the hardest. Esme had a hard time with him. It pained her heart to watch him go through it and it took years for him to finally be comfortable in his own skin.

I could see why Jasper understands Bella so damn much. They were both victims. Jasper could help her if she allowed it.

I pray she does.

James didn't know what he was up against. He doesn't know that this family will do whatever it took to protect the ones we loved.

But, if he ever set foot on our land, he was about to learn that lesson the hard way; it'll be a lesson he never comes back from.