Seeing Blaine standing in the middle of the car park, waving Kurt goodbye as a small tear betrayed him, almost broke Kurt's heart. Kurt was driving on the highway now; he was resting his head on his hand that was propped up against the door with his other hand on the wheel. Kurt sighed as another tear ran down his face. Leaving Dalton had been much harder than leaving McKinley. Blaine's face kept popping into Kurt's mind, the look on his face when he waved goodbye to Kurt. Kurt palmed his eye and hastily rubbed the tear away.
"Music." Kurt said.
"Music will help." Kurt said with a nod, he reached over to the radio and turned up the dial.
'Is this the way it's meant to be?
Only dreaming that you're missing me
I'm waiting here at home
I'll be crazy now you're gone
There's an empty place in my heart
Without my Anna it will break apart
It won't heal, it never fades away
I'll be thinking 'bout you everyday
Are you ready? Now you're gone
I realised my love for you was strong'
"Stupid techno." Kurt muttered as he switched to the next station.
I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us never thought it was gonna end that way
"Stupid Taylor Swift." Kurt said as he changed the station again.
But he aint gone, no
He ain't the leavin' kind
He'd never walk away
"Oh come on!" Kurt shouted as he turned off the radio, Kurt huffed back in his seat ran a hand through his hair. Kurt couldn't drive, the tears in his eyes were blocking his vision and he almost got side swiped by a truck when he tried to change lanes.
"I need a break" Kurt said to himself, he took the next exit and pulled into a small diner. He sat in his car and he pulled out his phone and text his dad.
To dad:
Hey dad I got a flat tire, probably take me half an hour to change it so I will be home a little late.
From dad:
No problem kid, need me to come and help?
To dad:
No it's fine, ill be home later
From dad:
Righto see ya then
Kurt wasn't going to tell his dad the real reason, his dad wouldn't understand. Kurt got out of his car and slammed the door shut. Kurt walked in to the diner and looked around. The waiters were dressed in blue jeans with leather jackets that said 'T bird' on the back; the waitresses wore a pin up style check dress that was obscenely short. Kurt sighed and walked over to the counter, he sat down on one of the retro spiny chairs with didn't make sense in a 50's style diner.
"Hey Hun, what can I get you?" Kurt looked up to see a bubbly brunette waitress brandishing a coffee pot in her hand.
"Coffee's fine." Kurt muttered, the waitress place a mug down infront of Kurt and proceeded to pour the coffee in.
"Rough day?" she asked as she down the pot, Kurt looked up at her and smiled weakly.
"Understatement." Kurt said as he sighed out a laugh.
"What's wrong?" she asked as she picked up a rag and started to wipe the bench.
"You wouldn't understand." Kurt said as he placed his hands around the mug, warming his hands.
"Try me." she said with an encouraging smile.
"Look, you seem sweet but I really just want to be left alone." Kurt said earnestly.
"No one likes to be alone." she said with her encouraging smile creeping back on to her face.
"Look," Kurt looked at her name tag "Beth, I have just said the hardest goodbye of my life, go away and leave me with my thoughts ok?" Kurt all but growled out.
"My god! I'm so sorry, coffee's on the house." Beth said politely and walked off. Kurt felt bad but it needed to be said. Kurt sighed as he took a long sip of his coffee; he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. Kurt groaned and pulled out his phone. He unlocked the screen and read the message.
From Charlotte:
Hey I took this yesterday at the market and forgot to send it to you
Kurt looked at the photo Charlotte had sent him. Kurt was hugging Blaine around the waist, smiling and looking deep into his eyes. Blaine was singing and smiling and holding Kurt close to him. They looked incredibly happy together, Kurt felt a wash of emotions over come him. The photo made him happy at first seeing him and Blaine together. Then confusion at why she didn't send it right away, and then anger surged through him. Where did she get off? Didn't she know that today was hard enough for him without being remind that he couldn't be like that with Blaine right now? Kurt just stared at his phone for ten minutes, going back and forth between looking at the picture and looking at the stupid smiley face that was at the end of the message. Kurt decided to send her a message back.
To Charlotte:
You are so inconsiderate
From Charlotte:
What did I do?
To Charlotte:
You think that that picture is helpful right now?
From Charlotte:
I thought you would like it
To Charlotte:
You thought wrong
From Charlotte:
I'm sorry, don't hate me :)
Kurt grimaced at the smiley face, he didn't bother replying. He just asked for another cup of coffee.
"You sure you don't want to talk?" Beth asked as she refiled his cup, Kurt just looked down at his cup and sighed.
"Do you ever think that you made the wrong decision?" Kurt asked as he played with the handle of the mug.
"Occasionally, but my problems aren't usually bigger than deciding what to have for breakfast." Beth said joyfully, Kurt cracked a weak smile.
"But your problems seem bigger than that." Beth said as she placed the coffee pot back in the holder.
"They are." Kurt said regretfully, he took a small sip of his coffee than placed it back on the counter.
"So what's wrong? Boyfriend troubles?" Beth asked earnestly, Kurt's head snapped up and looked at her strangely.
"I'm sorry?" Kurt asked with a confused glance.
"Oh, I just thought you were gay, no straight man I have ever seen walk through these doors has ever looked as nice as you." Beth complimented.
"Thank you, I'm gay and I'm having boyfriend troubles. You sure you don't mind talking about this?" Kurt asked suspiciously, Beth just shook her head and smiled.
"I have a brother who is gay and he is my biggest idol. Homophobia is just ignorance." Beth stated, Kurt just smiled.
"Couldn't agree with you more." Kurt said with a weak smile.
'So honey what's wrong? I have never seen anyone look as sad as you before, it's quite alarming." Beth said as she took the seat next to Kurt.
"Well I just had to say goodbye to Blaine, he's my boyfriend. I have a picture somewhere." Kurt said as he scrolled through his phone. He selected a picture of Blaine and Wes posing for the camera.
"Blaine's on the left" Kurt said as he showed her the picture.
"Damn, all the good looking man are either taken or gay." Beth said shaking her head, Kurt just smiled.
"Looks are only skin deep, he is much more than that. I could recite everything that I love about him but we would be here all day." Beth smiled at that "But the feeling of loss is killing me much more." Kurt said earnestly, he felt his eyes start to sting. 'Don't you dare cry' Kurt mentally yelled at himself.
"And that is why you are upset?" Beth asked as she handed the phone back to Kurt.
"Yes, than my friend sends me a stupid picture and it makes me start all over again." Kurt said angrily.
"Is that why you were glaring at your phone before?" Beth asked inquisitively, Kurt just nodded and closed his eyes as he rested his head in his hands.
"In a perfect world you could just stay with him and be happy but that is not reality. You will just have to accept this and move on." Beth said as she stood up from her seat, Kurt looked up at her scowled. Kurt choked down the last remains of his coffee and stood up angrily.
"Don't give up your day job." Kurt said hastily and walked out of the diner. He walked over to his car and hopped in; Kurt pulled on the highway and started his drive back home. Who the hell did she think she was? Kurt had asked her from the start to just leave him alone but he had to open his big mouth. What a stupid bitch, what does she know? 'Hopes she rots in hell' Kurt thought and nodded his head in agreement. Kurt could see perfectly now even though he was blinded by anger. Kurt might have drove a little over the speed limit, his speed increasing with every angry thought that entered his mind. He drove like this for 45minutes; he almost missed his turn off. Kurt took the exit and drove through Lima. He passed all the shops and drove into the suburban area. He drove through the streets and turned onto his. He felt his phone vibrate but ignored it. He pulled up in his drive way and turned off the ignition. Kurt sat back in the driver's seat and closed his eyes.
"Ok Kurt we are going to play a game" Kurt said to himself.
"Try and be like dapper Blaine and pretend like the world is made of sunshine and rainbows" Kurt said sarcastically to himself, but he needed to pretend like everything was fine around his dad, he didn't want him to worry. Kurt's phone buzzed again in his pocket.
2 new messages. Kurt unlocked his phone and read them.
From Charlotte:
Kurt I'm sorry.
Kurt didn't care; he would talk to her when he had calmed down a bit. Maybe drinking 3 cups of coffee in one day hadn't helped. He scrolled down and read the next message.
From Wes:
Good news, Blaine and David almost killed each and had to be restrained.
Kurt just stared at the phone dumbfounded. Blaine got in a fight?
To Wes:
What the hell happened?
From Wes:
It was quite scary actually; I have never seen Blaine like that before.
To Wes:
Are they ok?
From Wes:
Physically they are ok.
Kurt just slumped back down in his seat and sighed. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath; Kurt's door abruptly opened.
"You know you take power naps in the middle of the drive not after. Finn said sarcastically. "Why are you sleeping in your car anyway?" Finn asked as he looked at Kurt, Kurt just sighed and opened his eyes.
"Not sleeping, thinking."Kurt said as he reached in the back seat and grabbed his duffle bag. Kurt pulled the keys out of the ignition and jumped out of the car.
"Good to see you anyway." Kurt said as he pulled Finn into a hug, Finn hugged him back and took Kurt's bag.
"So why are you out the front?" Kurt asked as they walked to the front door.
"Puck just dropped me off from his house and I noticed that you were in your car and that brings us up to speed." Finn said matter-of-factly, Kurt just smiled weakly. Finn could make anyone smile with his truncated sentences.
"So what were you thinking about? You looked lost in your thoughts." Finn said as he stopped just outside the door. Kurt wasn't telling the truth to Finn, he trusted him but he let slip things all the time he wasn't suppose to.
"Um… girls." Kurt said sheepishly Finn dropped the bag and started laughing as he leant against the door.
"Oh my god that made my day." Finn said as he took a breath which only caused more laughter. Finn finally stood up against the door and clapped Kurt on the shoulder.
"You're one funny dude." Finn chuckled as he opened the door. They were hit with the delicious smell our Carole's home made chicken casserole.
"We're home." Finn shouted as he closed the door with a loud bang.
"Finn what have I told you about slamming doors?" Carole shouted from the kitchen.
"Sorry Mom" Finn said as he and Kurt made there way down the hallway. Kurt felt his phone vibrate in his pocket again; Kurt ignored it and walked into the kitchen.
"Kurt!" Carole squealed as she ran over and hugged him. Kurt made an 'oof' sound when she hit him. 'Ok Kurt, portray your inner Blaine. You must have picked up some tips from being around him so much' Kurt said in his head.
"Hey Carole, your hair looks amazing. Did you use that new shampoo I told you about?" Kurt asked.
"Yes I did honey, thank you for noticing." Carole said as she flushed a little.
"How could you not notice it looks amazing." Kurt said, 'don't over do it Kurt' Kurt thought to himself. Carole just laughed and hugged him tighter, his phone vibrated again.
"I think you have a message." Carole laughed as she let go of Kurt.
"It can wait." Kurt said.
"Kurt not use his phone? What is the world coming to?" Burt asked as he walked into the kitchen.
"Nice to see you too dad." Kurt said sarcastically.
"There he is, sarcastic as ever." Burt said in a highly amused tone.
"Shut up." Kurt laughed and pulled his dad into a tight hug.
"Why don't you take your stuff to your room and we can have dinner when you come back down?" Burt said as he let go of Kurt.
"Sounds like a plan." Kurt said as he walked over to his bag.
"Need some help?" Finn asked as he pushed himself off the counter.
"Just don't break anything." Kurt warned, Burt and Carole laughed. Kurt and Finn made their way out of the kitchen and walked down to his basement bedroom.
"So how is everyone at Dalton?" Finn asked as he placed Kurt's duffle bag on the bed.
"They're good, everyone's good." Kurt tried to say nonchalantly, Finn gave him a strange look. 'You're cracking Kurt, pull it together' Kurt scolded himself.
"You sure?" Finn asked as he took a seat on his bed. Kurt walked over to his bag and took an armful of clothes.
"Absolutely positive." Kurt said happily and walked over to his closet.
"That's awesome." Finn said joyfully as he lay back down on Kurt's bed. Kurt's phone vibrated again.
"Oh my god." Kurt groaned as he pulled out his phone.
"Problem?" Finn asked curiously.
"You'll know as soon as I do." Kurt said as he unlocked his phone.
3 new messages.
From David:
Dude I didn't do shit, Blaine went mental. It's not my fault.
Kurt just shook his head and slumped down on his desk chair.
"Everything ok?" Finn asked, Kurt ignored him and read the next message.
From Charlotte:
Kurt... talk to me! I don't want you to be angry at me.
Kurt just shook his head slowly and smiled. He had calmed down now and wasn't angry at Charlotte.
To Charlotte:
Its ok, I'm sorry. I was stressed and I let it get the better of me.
Kurt scrolled down to the next message.
From Wes:
Blaine hasn't said anything for half an hour. It don't know what to do.
Kurt just sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Dude what's wrong?" Finn asked as he sat up on the bed, Kurt just waved him off and sighed again. He had lost count how many times he had sighed today.
"Nothing, just a melodrama." Kurt said as he looked over at Finn.
"Melodrama is a music thing right?" Finn asked seriously, Kurt just rolled his eyes at him.
"That's a melody, Finn." Kurt said exasperatedly.
"Oh right." Finn said impishly. Kurt's phone started to ring. Kurt looked at the ID to see Wes ringing.
"Dude, what the fuck! why won't you tell me what to do?" Wes whispered hastily into the phone. Kurt looked over at Finn.
"Look can I call you later?" Kurt asked, Finn mouthed 'Blaine?' at him, Kurt shook his head and returned to his conversation.
"Fine, but what am I suppose to do? I usually can't get Blaine to shut up!" Wes said desperately.
"Get him a bag of jellybeans and make him watch 'ladder 49' ok. He will feel better after that." Kurt said as he picked up his duffle bag and stuffed it under the stairs.
"Dude that movie has a sad ending." Wes reminded him, Kurt ran a hand threw his hair.
"Or 'I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry', just anything with firemen in it ok? He likes firemen." Kurt said, he heard Finn giggle from behind him, Kurt silenced him with a glare.
"Fine, but I think he needs to hear your voice or something. Why aren't you upset?" Wes asked, Kurt was hurt by the question, he was upset but he was also a very good actor.
"I am but I am not going to let my family see that. It's hard to do so stop telling me how sad Blaine is ok. It doesn't make me feel any better knowing that." Kurt whispered hastily, he could see Finn straining to hear him.
"Fine but call him. It's creeping me out to see him like this." Wes said pointedly.
"I know, I'll call him before I go to bed." Kurt said.
"Good, bye Kurt." Wes said.
"Don't forget, jellybeans and fireman movie. Bye Wes" Kurt said and hung up the phone.
"Fireman aye?" Finn asked with a huge grin spreading on his face.
"Finn, so not the time." Kurt said as he walked to the stairs, Finn jumped off the bed and made his way to the stairs.
"I think it is a perfect time." Finn said as they trudged up the stairs.
"Finn you don't know what is happening so drop it." Kurt said rashly as he walked onto the top step.
"I guess it has something to do with Blaine and firemen." Finn said proudly, Burt gave them a confused look before walking into the dinning room. Kurt stopped and faced Finn; Finn crashed into him and took a step back.
"Finn I am going to say this once, shut up and drop it. We are not discussing this further, so back off." Kurt said pointedly and walked into the dinning room. He took his seat and waited for the rest of his family to join him. Finn sat from across from him and wouldn't meet his eyes. Carole and Burt walked in carrying bowls and placed them down on the table. They took their seats and began to eat.
"So Kurt, did you change the tyre ok?" Burt asked as he stabbed a piece of chicken, Kurt thought back and remembered that he told his dad he had to change a tyre on his car.
"Yeah I did, I learnt from the best." Kurt said as he placed a spoonful of casserole in his mouth, his stomach growled. All he had eaten today was half an apple and was surprisingly hungry.
"You'll give your old man a big head." Burt said coyly, Kurt just rolled his eyes and continued to eat his casserole.
"So have the warblers been working on any new songs?" Finn asked as he looked down at the table.
"Subtle Finn," Kurt said sarcastically "and no they haven't".
"That's good to know" Finn said happily, he buttered a piece of bread and dunked it into the sauce.
"So how's Blaine?" Carole asked innocently, Kurt started to choke on the sauce as he was caught off guard by the question. Kurt coughed and spluttered and finally regained his normal breathing. How the hell does he answer that question? Does he tell her that Blaine is completely fine besides the fact he had to be physically restrained today? Or that Blaine had looked like he was about to shatter into a million pieces after he said goodbye to Kurt? Or that Blaine had been rather promiscuous the last couple of days?
"Kurt?" Carole asked again.
"Sorry, he's fine." Kurt said nonchalantly, he looked down at his bowl and took another spoonful, he felt questioning looks on him but didn't look up.
"Is everything ok between you two?" Carole pressed.
"Totally fine." Kurt said still staring at his bowl.
"You sure?" Carole asked again.
"Carole, I said everything is fine." Kurt said angrily an instantly regretted it.
"I'm sorry, that was rude, but everything is fine." Kurt assured.
"Ok honey." Carole said sweetly. Kurt didn't mean to snap at her but he really didn't feel comfortable talking about Blaine with her right now.
Dinner carried out better than Kurt thought. Everyone was laughing and joking. They made fun of Finn when he would say something silly. Kurt was just happy the focus was off him for the time being. Everyone cleared the table and walked into the kitchen. Kurt offered to help Carole with the dishes while Burt and Finn went in the lounge room to watch the game. Carole filled the sink up with hot water and placed a few plates in the sink. Kurt picked up a tea towel and dried the washed plate Carole handed him.
"I'm sorry about before, I was out of line." Kurt said as he placed the plate on the counter.
"Oh that's not your fault, I was just being nosy." Carole said as she washed the knives and folks.
"But that is no excuse for my behaviour." Kurt said earnestly, Carole looked over at him and smiled.
"What?" Kurt asked curiously.
"You sound so much like Blaine, it's quite amusing." Carole said as her smile grew. 'Its working' Kurt thought to himself.
"He thinks he is being polite but really it's just annoying sometimes." Kurt said as he smiled to himself, Kurt remembered that he needed and wanted to talk to Blaine. Kurt looked up at the clock on the wall. 8:30pm, it would be suspicious if he went to bed now.
"You really like him, don't you?" Carole said with a cheeky grin, Kurt just rolled his eyes. Like was an understatement.
"And you really like dad." Kurt said sarcastically, Carole just laughed and continued to wash the dishes. They chatted about Carole's outfit while they did the rest of the dishes; Carole blushing every so often when Kurt complimented her. They finished doing the dishes and walked into the lounge room. Kurt sat down on the couch and folded one leg under him and he rested his head on his hand that was propped up by the arm of the couch. Kurt would glance at the screen ever so often and pretend to be interested. Kurt's phone buzzed in his pocket, he pulled it out and looked at it.
"Someone is popular tonight." Finn said with a cheeky grin.
"I'm popular every night." Kurt simply said and looked at the screen.
From Sophie:
So what day suits you for my make over? I was thinking maybe Tuesday or Wednesday
To Sophie:
Tuesday is better, I have glee practice Wednesday
From Sophie:
Sounds amazing, do you want me to bring anything?
Kurt desperately wanted to write 'Blaine' but refrained.
To Sophie:
Just bring yourself; I think I will have everything else. I'll see you then.
Kurt looked at the time on his phone. It was 9:15pm, by the time he had a shower and did his facial routine it would be around a reasonable time to go to bed.
"I'm going to have a shower." Kurt announced as he stood up.
"Towels are down in your room." Carole said as she continued to look at the TV, Kurt nodded and made his way down to his room. Kurt walked down the stairs and walked over to his closet, he pulled out a white undershirt and a pair of grey sweat pants. He placed them on his bed and grabbed his towel and headed into his bathroom. He walked in the bathroom and threw his towel on the sink and turned the knobs of the shower to the right temperature. He took off his clothes and hopped into the shower. He let the hot water envelop him for a minute before washing his hair. He found his shower always relaxing, it felt like standing under a waterfall and he enjoyed just standing there feeling the hot water trickle down his face. He took time washing his hair and exfoliating his face, the steam of the shower opened his pores up more and was a perfect time to apply it. He rinsed his hair and exfoliating cream off his face and turned the shower off. He just stood there for a minute with his back resting against the shower wall, today had been one crazy day and now he was finally in a calm, secluded spot and really didn't feel like moving. He stood there for a minute breathing in the therapeutic steam before heaving himself out of the shower and wrapping a towel around himself. He walked over to his mirror and applied toner and moisturiser to his face. After he was finished he walked into his room and put his pyjamas on, he towel dried his hair and threw the towel over the door. He walked up the stairs and said goodnight to everyone, he quickly hurried down the stairs and reached for his phone. He held his phone in one hand and started to pace. What the hell was he going to say to Blaine? Of course he was concerned as hell about Blaine, but Wes said he wasn't talking. Does that mean he wouldn't talk to him? Kurt laid down on his bed, he thrusted his head back into the pillows and sighed. 'What do I say?' Kurt asked himself.
"Just start with hello" Kurt said sarcastically, he scrolled through his phone and selected Blaine's name, and he pressed the little green phone on the screen and held it next to his ear. He heard the dial tone and than it rang. He heard someone answer the phone.
"Hello Blaine?" Kurt asked.