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Chapter 4

Regina did everything she could to prolong leaving the flower shop, but despite her best efforts she was outside, locking the front doors by 5:02. She let her eyes wander to the tattoo parlor across the street for a moment. The front of the shop was empty aside from a woman leaning over the counter, but she wasn't who Regina was looking for.

Her nerves over the whole thing hadn't subsided, even after her talk with Kathryn, and seemed to only have gotten worse as the day went on. Now that the only thing between being alone with Mal, and the girls of course, was picking up Emma, she was practically shaking. She closed her eyes and turned her back on the adjacent store with a deep, calming breath.

In the back of her mind she knew she was being ridiculous, but she couldn't help it, everything was different with Mal. Her calm and collected demeanor went out the window whenever the other woman was around and with things being so tense between them, Regina was a mess. She didn't want her and Mal's attitudes toward each other to affect Emma and Lily, and she decided to do her best to keep things civil between them in front of the girls.

Plan in place, Regina felt her nerves slowly begin to dissipate and she headed for her car.

X

Mal sat the the park she'd taken Lily to the day before. Lily was happily running around without a care in the world while she sat on a bench, her leg bouncing nervously while she waited for Regina to show up. Her mind went over all the ways this little playdate could end badly, she even had herself half convinced Regina wouldn't show up, and it had her on edge.

After her little chat with Ursula and Vic her mind had been put at ease for about an hour before her imagination got the better of her. There were any number of ways this evening would end and Mal's mind hadn't conjured any that ended well. Lily and Emma didn't need to witness an argument so Mal would do everything in her power to avoid it if she could.

The sound of car tires on gravel caught her attention and Mal looked up to see Regina stepping out of her car. She watched as the other woman opened the back door and the little blonde from yesterday bounded out of the car.

Emma ran as fast as her little legs could carry her toward the playground and Lily ran to meet her halfway. The girls nearly knocked each other to the ground as they threw their arms around each other. Mal couldn't help but smile at how adorable the sight was, but it soon faded when her eyes landed on Regina making her way toward the bench where she sat. The other woman held her hand over her stomach and despite the slight smile on her face, Mal could see the uncertainty in her eyes.

"Hello," the brunette greeted awkwardly, hovering near the end of the bench while she watched the girls.

"Hi," Mal replied, turning her own attention to where Lily and Emma sat under the slide babbling away together.

"How difficult do you think it'll be to separate them again?" Regina asked, glancing down at the blonde.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

Regina hummed in agreement and pulled her coat tighter around herself. She didn't move to join Mal on the bench and continued to watch the girls. The silence that settled around them wasn't exactly awkward, but it was a far cry from comfortable. After several moments Mal shifted over slightly on the bench and cleared her throat to get Regina's attention.

"You can sit down," she said looking pointedly at the empty space beside her. "I don't bite," she added in a mumble, an undeniable smirk on her face.

"Now you and I both know that's not true," Regina countered in a low voice. She rounded the bench and sat down with a smirk of her own. She was sure Mal hadn't meant for her to hear the last part, but she couldn't resist the urge to return the snark.

Mal let out a chuckle at that. Regina had always been quick to counter her sass, and all the years they'd spent apart hadn't changed that it seemed.

"What's it like?" Regina asked suddenly before the silence between them could stretch too long.

"What is what like dear?" Mal questioned with a raised brow, having no idea what Regina was talking about.

"Having your own shop," Regina clarified, looking over at Mal now. "You always used to talk about having your own place."

Mal nodded her head in understanding. She'd talked about opening her own tattoo parlor countless times over the years, especially with Regina when they were together. The memories of happier times with the woman beside her that rushed through her mind sent a pang of sadness through her chest, but she carried on for the sake of making conversation.

"A bit overwhelming," she answered honestly. "Ursula and Vic are a big help though."

"I know the feeling," Regina commented. "Emma was only a couple months old when I opened the Secret Garden."

Mal fell silent and looked around for the girls. They had moved on from the slide and were hanging from the monkey bars, giggling away. A small smile spread over her face at the sight.

"Lily is a handful now, I can only imagine trying to run a store with a newborn," she finally said, giving Regina the credit she deserved.

"I had a lot of help," Regina admitted, "A lot of friends willing to lend a hand."

For some reason that set Mal's teeth on edge. It irritated her to no end, having to watch Regina's obviously close bond with the people who worked in her store from across the street. They'd been nearly inseparable when they were together and even before that and to compare that to where they were now was infuriatingly heartbreaking.

"We were friends once," the blonde mumbled, looking down at her hands in her lap. She heard Regina inhale sharply. She knew she was dangerously close to the unspoken line that was keeping their conversation civil, but the words left her mouth before she could stop them.

"She's beautiful," Mal quickly commented before Regina could respond, effectively changing the subject and steering the conversation back into safe territory.

Regina's face practically lit up at the compliment, but her eyes looked pained. "Thank you. No thanks to me I'm afraid. Lily is quite the cutie herself."

Mal nodded her head absently at the returned compliment as she found herself more intrigued be Regina's former statement. Surely it was uncharacteristic for a mother not to take credit for their child's looks. Lily looked nothing like herself, but she still took any compliment that came her way and pointed out a feature Lily favored from her. She narrowed her eyes and turned her head toward Regina.

"Oh?" Mal questioned lightly, an eyebrow raised.

On the surface it was an innocent enough inquiry, but Regina seemed to understand the unspoken question. She looked down at her hands and nervously played with her fingers. She bit her lip before looking up from her hands and met Mal's gaze, her eyes brimmed with tears.

"She's not his, if that's what you're asking," the answer came out in a hiss.

"I wasn't..." Mal started, but Regina snapped at her.

"Yes, you were."

Mal watched the muscles in Regina's jaw jump and her fists clench. She'd obviously hit a nerve with her ex, but she couldn't find it in her to care. Now that this can of worms was open there was no stopping it. Civility be damned.

"I take it things didn't end well between the two of you then. Oh what was his name again?" Mal tapped her chin, pretending to think it over. She knew his name, how could she forget?

"Stop," Regina growled, glaring at the other woman. Her eyes swept over the park momentarily to make sure Lily and Emma were out of earshot.

"I don't think I will."

"Please."

It almost sounded like she was begging and Mal paused. Regina was practically shaking with what seemed like a mixture of rage and something Mal couldn't quite put her finger on. For a moment she felt guilty, especially after promising herself she wouldn't instigate a fight, but she couldn't help it. The pain Regina put her through lingered in her heart still and she want her to know that.

"Why? Did he do to you what you did to me?"

Regina didn't answer, only stared straight ahead. Her anger was clear. Good.

Mal was distracted by Emma and Lily running up to the bench.

"We wanna swing," Emma declared, coming to a halt in front of her mother and looking between the two women. When she saw the look on Regina's face her little brow furrowed and she tilted her head. "What'sa matter Mommy?"

"Nothing, sweetheart" Regina lied, subtly wiping at her eyes. She put on a fake smile for the little girls and hoped Mal was doing the same. "Go on over to the swings and I'll be right there."

"Race ya!" Lily squealed before taking off in the direction of the swings.

When she was sure Lily and Emma could no longer hear them, Regina's fake smile vanished and she turned her razor sharp gaze on Mal.

"It is none of your business what happened after we split up," she hissed, which was far more frightening than if she had yelled. "Emma is mine and mine alone. He was long gone when she was born and you do not get to hold that over my head anymore."

With that Regina stood from the bench and stormed off for the swings, leaving Mal to feel like a complete ass. She looked over at Regina pushing Emma and Lily on the swings, a genuine smile on her face as if their conversation had never happened. Mal looked down at her hands guiltily. She hadn't meant to anger Regina that way, she hadn't even meant to bring up anything about their history together, but once she got on a roll she couldn't be stopped. It was a character flaw she was working on.

This wasn't how the evening was supposed be. With a heavy sigh she stood from the bench and made her way over to the swings. She slowly approached the laughing trio with her hands in her pockets.

"Momma, look how high I can go!" Lily hollered, pumping her little legs to swing herself higher and higher.

"Any higher and you'll be flying Lily-bug," Mal chuckled, moving to stand behind her daughter to give her a little push.

Regina ignored Mal's presence all together and moved over to give the other woman a wide berth.

Mal put her head down and watched Lily for a moment before looking back over at Regina. All her attention was focused on the giggling girl on the swing, but her smile was deceiving. Regina had never been good at concealing her emotions, especially from her, and the pain she saw reflected in those big brown eyes weighed heavily on her heart. She could be angry with Regina as much as she wanted, but that didn't give her the right to intentionally hurt her like she had. That was no way to deal with everything that had happened between them. Mal only hoped she hadn't destroyed any chance of them working things out, like Vic had suggested.

The girls were on the swings until they wore themselves out, oblivious to the tension between the women. When Emma and Lily scrambled off the swings in favor of running around the play equipment, Regina sat down in the vacant swing and watched the girls run off the last of their energy.

Mal watched Regina. The way she leaned her head against the cool metal chain in her hand and started moving the swing back and forth gently. The small smile the spread over her face as the girls began a game of tag. It was then that Mal realized that no matter how hard she tried to deny it, she still loved this woman and it seemed like nothing was going to change that. Despite everything they'd been through she hadn't been able to move on in ten years and every moment they spent together only made it worse.

She had two options. She could either continue pushing Regina away and lashing out at her whenever she got the chance, hurting both of them in the process. Or she could sit down and have a real conversation with Regina and try to fix what had been broken all those years ago and maybe start over, if Regina wanted to as well.

Mal just hoped her outburst earlier hadn't ruined her chance for the latter.

"Regina…" she started softly, but Regina ignored her and got up from the swing.

"I think they've finally worn themselves out," Regina said pointing to the two girls who had stopped their game of tag and were laying in the grass. Every now and then one of them would point up to the sky as they watched the clouds.

"It would seem so," Mal agreed.

If Regina heard the disappointment in her tone, she didn't say anything, she just started walking over to the girls. Mal followed a step behind and smiled when Regina sat in the grass next to Emma.

"What are you girls looking at?" Mal heard her ask.

"The clouds, Miss 'Gina." Lily exclaimed happily causing Mal to chuckle softly. Lily was never one to be shy.

"That one's a castle!' Emma said, stabbing a little finger at the sky.

"And a dragon!" Lily added.

Regina leaned back on her elbows and Mal couldn't tell if she was pretending to see what the little ones saw but if she was she was doing a hell of a job playing like she could. It was a lovely sight, right almost, and it would be burned into her memory for a long time.

With the decision to mend things firmly cemented in her mind, Mal silently approached the three to avoid disturbing their daydreaming. She could see the telltale signs of sleepy four year olds as soon as she sank to the ground beside Lily. Lily's eyes were drooping and she had her thumb in her mouth while Emma had moved over to rest her back against Regina's chest, her eyelids getting heavy as well.

"Momma, I'm sleepy," Lily whined, climbing into Mal's lap.

"I bet you are," Mal said smoothing Lily's hair down and planting a kiss on top of her head. She and Emma had been running around non stop for nearly two hours, Mal would have expected them to crash much sooner.

"I think it's time we call it a night," Regina whispered over to Mal, glancing down at Emma to prove her point. The four year old's eyes were closed, clearly on her way to sleep.

Mal looked down at Lily who was losing her own battle with sleep and sighed with a nod. Their evening had come to an end and despite the tension between them both Mal and Regina were disappointed nonetheless.

Regina was aware of the looks Mal was giving her, had been since she had walked over to the swings. She'd picked up on the change in her demeanor the moment it had shifted but she closed herself off anyway. Mal's words had cut deep. It was something they were both good at unfortunately, and though she felt like she deserved every bit of Mal's wrath, having her past mistakes thrown in her face so blatantly reminded her of the night Mal left. That night they'd both said things they didn't mean and at the time Regina thought the damage was irreparable, but now she wasn't so sure.

Yes, being around Mal dredged up a lot of feelings Regina thought she had long buried, but she was wrong. Whenever she caught a glimpse of the other woman around town or when they were forced to interact she was reminded of what they once had and how much she wanted it back. Her feelings for Mal hadn't diminished in the last ten years despite her best efforts and having her back in her life gave her a sliver of hope that they could possibly work through their differences.

She was willing to try if Mal was, all she had to do was figure out if she was or not.

Regina figured they'd had one too many emotional outbursts for the day and decided she would try talking with Mal as Kathryn had suggested another time, especially when Lily and Emma weren't around if things didn't go well. With a little difficulty, she held Emma close and stood as best she could without waking the little girl in her arms. Mal did the same with Lily and once they were both on their feet they headed for the parking lot.

Regina easily got Emma settled in her car seat, the girl was out, and turned to find Mal having a bit of difficulty getting Lily strapped in. Keeping an eye on her own sleeping daughter, Regina made her way over to Mal's car where Lily was putting up a fight.

"I don't wanna go Momma," the little girl whined, shrugging off the straps around her shoulders.

"We have to, it's getting late."

"No, I wanna play. Where's Emma?"

"Emma's over there sleeping," Regina pointed out, moving over so Lily could see into her car. She settled down once she saw Emma fast asleep and stuck her thumb in her mouth. The second her thumb was in her mouth her eyelids began to droop once more.

Mal was able to strap her into her seat and by the time she closed the door Lily's breathing evened out and her battle with sleep was lost. Mal turned to Regina with a grateful expression.

"Thank you," she said, tugging her coat around herself against the cold now that the sun had almost set.

Regina shrugged, shoving her own hands in her pockets. "I figured you wouldn't want a complete meltdown on your hands."

"You'd be correct."

The two stood awkwardly together for a moment before Mal spoke again.

"We'll have to do this again. It was fun."

"Fun?" Regina questioned with a scoff. She shot Mal a skeptical look.

"For Emma and Lily I mean," Mal clarified.

"Emma would love that."

"Maybe next time we could grab dinner as well," she suggested, just like Regina had the night before.

"Sounds good to me," Regina quickly agreed to the plan of another outing.

"Great."

Another weird silence spanned between them and this time it was Regina who broke it.

"Goodbye Mal," she said nodding her head at the other woman.

"Until next time, my dear," Mal replied before turning to get in her own car.

Regina couldn't help the smile that threatened to break out across her face at Mal's parting words. If only things could always be that easy.

Now this chapter was an emotional roller coaster, but we got some insight into what Mal and Regina are thinking.

Let me know what you think :)

Until next time.