Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from Twilight!

A week later and I was officially living with the bitchy Leah Clearwater and boy was she bitchy. I'm not sure if she is having her 'special time' or what, but I hope she is not like this all the time. I can't say one word without her biting my head off. Maybe it is the stress of moving or the fact that she hasn't had the pleasure of fucking me yet and she realizes how much she really wants to. Whatever is bothering has made it so my day is quickly turning to shit.

The night we both rented the apartment, I had been so sure we would end up fucking, but apparently she was so pleased to get a place that she had gone home to start packing. I had not seen her until today due to both of us getting our shit together and now I was wishing I had waited another day to move in. She was hot and everything, but there is only so much bitching a guy can take. Especially when he has the hangover from hell and her cousin visiting and throwing a party in his brain.

The first thing she bitched about was the fact that I had hooked up my stereo without her permission. God forbid I hook up a decent sound system. The next complaint on her list is who gets the bedroom. Oh this should be fun. "I call dibs on the bedroom and you can have the spare room as a bedroom."

Since this was my place first, shouldn't I be getting the bedroom? Or since I was a complete gentleman we could always share the bed. Who wouldn't want to share a bed with yours truly? I know I did not mind sharing a bed with her. Hmm, I wondered hopefully if Leah slept in the nude as well. "I thought we had to share?"

The look she shot me was filled with irritation and it only grew when I threw my body in front of the bedroom door. She couldn't go in there yet because I had left a cute little blond in their last night and she had yet to wake up. It would be rude to wake her up after how nicely she had sucked me off. "I am sharing by letting you live here at all."

"I think we should split the bedroom." I blurted out while trying to block her from the bedroom. She was trying to push me out of the way and due to the fact my head was pounding, she was starting to succeed. Add on top of that the fact the whole apartment was doing the wave and I am thoroughly screwed.

"Not going to happen, pretty boy." My Quilette roommate stated firmly as she finally managed to shove me out of the way and to the floor. Her tanned hand reaching for the door handle had my heart pounding. She was going to kick my ass if she found a naked girl in what she claimed to be her room, though it may be worth it if she decided to have a little girl on girl action. To be honest, she seemed the type to stray outside the box if you want to put it that way. "You keep your penis in the spare room and away from me."

Scrambling to get to your feet is very hard when you are still half drunk from the night before. Try as I may, I just could not seem to get to my feet quickly enough. Why the fuck was having such a hard time standing up? "Leah you really shouldn't go in-"

My warning seemed to come too late. Her hand twisted and turned the knob as the door opened slightly. You know when you watch those horror movies and everything is in slow motion? Well that is what was happening to me in this moment. Every little second that passed felt like a year and still I could not do anything to stop her from entering the bedroom where my latest conquest lay. All I could do was let my mouth fall open and watch as disaster came one slow inch at a fucking time.

When the door was fully opened I thought for sure my new roomie would scream or throw a fit, but Leah did nothing of those things. She simply stood there for a few minutes before she calmly, and when I say calmly I mean scary calm before the storm type of shit, shut the door and turned to look at me. If you were not looking at her eyes then you would think it didn't bother her at all. Yet if you looked in to her dark and now extremely angry eyes, you would be pissing yourself. I sure as hell know I am close to doing so.

"You and I pretty boy," She hissed as she stomped over to where I still lay on the floor before grabbing me by the ear and hauling me to my feet. She dragged me over to the bedroom door before throwing it open again and waving her free arm in the direction of the, now as I look at her in my less drunken state than when I met her, not so gorgeous blonde, who still lay sleeping peacefully in the bed. "Need to have a talk about what is and what is not allowed. You see that girl passed out in my bed? This is not an okay thing for me to find. I have a problem with the fact there is a naked woman in my bed. You see, I know she isn't waiting there for me because I have better taste. Coincidently that is the same reason I won't fuck you, but as I was saying, I have better taste and so she isn't here for me and must be here because of you. You have thirty minutes to get her out of my bed and out of our apartment. This is a no skank zone and when I come back with coffee she better be gone because you and I need to have a talk about rules."

"Wait just a fucking minute miss I think I am queen of the world." I snapped at her as I closed the door to the bedroom and grabbed her by the arm pulling her out in to the kitchen so we would not disturb my guest. "This is my home too and I have a right to have company here if I want."

Leah snorted and pulled her arm from my grasp. "Do you even know her name?"

What the hell did that have to do with anything? Still, did I know her name? "Of course I know her name! It is Tina, Tanya, Tyra, Tara! Her name is Tara!"

"This isn't a game of guess who that the whore is." She huffed and shook her head. I could hear her sigh as she reached up to rub her temples. "There is a difference between company, friends, and one night stands. That girl in there is clearly a one night stand. She is your wham bam girl and I don't want to make a habit of finding wham bam girls in my room. When I get back with coffee I will explain the difference between friends and one night stands. I would hope you know what a friend is. Since I have the displeasure of knowing you, I am not sure you actually have friends. Your sister's fiancée doesn't count."

Damn and I had been planning to use Jasper's name. I decided to tease her a bit. "Are you mad that I didn't make you my wham bam girl? There is still plenty of time. The day is young and I am sure that we can-"

The front door slamming shut made me realize she had stormed out. She so wanted me and she did not even realize it. Why else would she be so pissed about finding out I had been with another woman? Leah better not think that just because we were living together that I would stop being my charming self. I couldn't help it if women were drawn to me and who was I to push them away? She would either have to get used to it, move out, or sleep with me to keep my mind off of other women. Since I doubted she would get used to it or move out, that meant I would be getting lucky very soon.

This day was going to be great. Maybe I could make my own set of rules. This was going to be excellent I could taste it. I could already feel my mind coming up with some great rules. I was a genius in hiding and soon my roommate would realize it as well. The first rule I would propose would be that we had to walk around naked all the time or it could just be her if she wanted it to be that way. She would most likely say no that rule, but I was hoping she would say yes. Maybe it would be my lucky day and she would propose that rule before I had a chance. Quickly I went in search of a pen and paper so I could write down some of my brilliant ideas.

TBC…

AN: I really liked this chapter. It was fun to right and would have been longer, but I am so tired. I will update as soon as I can. Do you guys have ideas for rules? I would love to hear them if you do. I have a list of rules Leah has and a few Edward has, but I could always use more. The funnier, weirder, or just plain odd they are and the more likely I am to use your ideas. Let me know if you liked this chapter and what you thought about it.

Please R&R like always!