November 13, 2007
5:11 p.m.

Percy brought me home and simply decided to stick around for a few hours. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary for him to do that, really he probably lived at my house more than his own. Obviously, I liked it that way.

"Do you have any mustard?" Percy asked me. He was halfway into the refrigerator. I took the opportunity to get a good look at his butt before answering.

"If you can't see it, it isn't there."

"You're such a realist." Percy backed out of the fridge empty handed and pushed it closed with his hip. "Do you believe in the boogie man?"

"No."

"Santa."

"Nope."

"I know you believe in the Easter Bunny."

"Percy, please."

"Alright," Percy hopped up onto the counter beside me; "But I'm making it known here and now that I believe in the Easter Bunny."

I shook my head and smiled; "Of course you do." I ruffled his hair, receiving a jab to my ribcage in response. Just as a loud shrill squeal left my mouth, my mother struggled into the kitchen, shopping bags in both arms.

"Percy, stop molesting my daughter." She joked with a wink. Percy cleared his throat.

"Yes ma'am, sorry ma'am." He saluted her. I rolled my eyes and died a little on the inside. My mother and Percy were as close as if they were family, except they weren't, and my mom had zero reservations about crossing that bright neon line in between.

Percy hopped down and took one of the bags from my mom, she smiled and thanked him.

"So what are you kids up to tonight?" She asked, setting a bag beside me. I peered into it, reaching down to retrieve a box of animal crackers.

"Well, mother dearest, we figured we'd go out with the bitches and smoke some crack." I answered nonchalantly. Percy snorted and I looked up to see my mom's infamous 'That's Not Funny, Sophia Rose' look. I smiled; "Just kidding. Percy's allergic to crack and the bitches scare the shit out of me." I bit the head off of a donkey and did my best to look innocent. My mother just rolled her eyes and Percy gave me a thumbs up. I flipped him the bird just as my mother turned to look at me. Her jaw dropped and I leapt off the counter and started tucking groceries into various cupboards. I could hear Percy laughing hysterically. My mother walked past behind me and swatted me gently on the back of the head. I gave her a look and tossed a carton of eggs at Percy.

"So what are you two really doing?" My mom asked. She sat down at the table, making an exaggerated grunt as she did as if she were really old or something. I shrugged again and opened a bag of Oreos.

"I don't know. Percy wha-"

"I have a date." He grinned and took the cookie out of my hand and ate it. I just stared at my empty hand with my mouth hanging open and tried to pretend he hadn't just said that.

"Oh, well now, with who?" My mother's over excitement made me nauseous. I pulled a face and pushed the bag of cookies away from me, opting for the carton of ice cream in the plastic grocery bag next to it.

"Annabeth." Percy grinned again, licking the white frosting off the cookie. I rummaged through a drawer for a spoon and couldn't seem to find one. I cursed inwardly and opened another drawer.

"Where are the spoons?"

"Is she your girlfriend?" My mom asked. I still found no spoon. What the hell is going on here? I thought.

"Why are there no spoons?"

"Yeah, going on three months." Percy said proudly. I dug frantically through a third drawer.

"Seriously, mo-"

"Percy I'm so happy for you, that's wonderful. Is she pretty?" My mom was leaning forward as if this was the most interesting thing to ever happen in the history of the world. I bent over to peek deep into the back of the drawer.

"Yeah." Percy sighed, I mean actually sighed; like in those old black and white romance flicks. He fucking sighed! And if that wasn't enough, he kept talking; "She's the most beautiful girl in the world."

"God!" I slammed the drawer; "Why the hell can't I find a freaking spoon? Where are all the spoons?" I shouted. Both my mother and Percy looked at me. They stared, open mouthed. I just stood there and blinked. Percy reached past me into the sink and pulled a spoon out of the strainer. I just looked at it, let out a helpless whine of a sigh and walked away. I went upstairs and shut myself in my room, turned on the stereo; and buried my head in the sand. Like a fucking ostrich. I hate ostriches.