The first time Dick asks Logan for advice
"Dude, I can't get past this buddy-buddy stage with Mac. I mean, it's cool and all, but—"
"But what?"
"But it's not exactly all I'm lookin' for."
"Dick, you've never seemed to have a problem with girls before. What do you normally do to let them know you're interested?"
"Please, like you don't know," he said to Logan as if he was joking.
Logan chuckled. "Enlighten me."
"You know—the look."
"The look?"
"Yes, come off it, Logan. Just because the she-spy's got your ball sack in a jar, doesn't mean you've lost all memory of how to approach, engage, and score with chicks. You know the look I'm talking about."
"I do, Dick, but I think that's your problem. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you primarily use the look with strangers, right?"
"Well yeah?"
"Like to reel in across the bar strangers?"
"Yes. Logan, you're acting like you've never done the whole notice- size up-stare down-desire in your eyes approach and I've seen you do it dozens of times," Dick said getting frustrated.
"The look absolutely works on chicks you don't know, Dick. Girls you just meet and want to take home. But it's never gonna' get you a girlfriend."
"It worked for Madison!"
Logan hid his disgust well. "Okay, but you and Madison basically just screwed on a daily basis and then she started calling you're her boyfriend, right? Isn't that how it started?"
"I guess so."
"See, that's never going to fly with Mac. One word of caution, don't use the look on Mac."
Dick was quiet for a few minutes.
"You already tried, didn't you?" Logan finally asked.
"Yes!" Dick yelled in complete exasperation, "and it got me nowhere! Worse than nowhere. The first time she asked if my stomach was bothering me and the second time she told me to stop looking at her like she didn't have any clothes on."
"Oh Dick!" Logan said, amused and mortified for his friend, "That's too funny!"
"Nothing about this is funny! "
"Okay, okay," Logan said trying to stop laughing, "Dick, you have to realize it's going to go a lot slower with Mac. "
"If it goes anywhere at all…" Dick mumbled.
"Have you thought about telling her how you feel?" Logan said, realizing it was likely Dick had never thought of this as an opening.
"I've thought about it, sure. And then I've thought about how much it would suck when she laughs or looks like she pities me or tries to say 'you're nice, but' whatever, Logan. Nevermind."
As Dick gets ready to exit, Logan offers, "Maybe you should just work on getting to know her better and letting her know you."
"I think I know her pretty well, Logan. What else is there to learn?"
"Dick, if you think you know all there is to a woman you're either not very interested in her or you're as dumb other people think you are. You might know what Mac likes to eat and what she does in her spare time, but until you know what she's scared of or passionate about or her secrets or any of a host of things about how she thinks, not just things she does, you don't know anything about her." Logan paused and said seriously, "If you don't care about Mac like that Dick, then you need to just stop all of this right now. You're my friend and I want you to be happy, but I don't want her to get hurt."
Dick was thoughtful for a few minutes. He knew a few things about her that she probably didn't share with many others. He remembered the happiest he had been with Mac was when he found out they thought many of the same things about Beaver. He also just liked when he learned more about her life and when she was asking about his. Maybe Logan knew what he was talking about, despite his track record. "So how do I find out all that stuff about her?"
"Dick," Logan said gently now, realizing his friend truly cared for the girl but had never had feelings like this before, "It's not all sleuthing and spying. You just ask her."
"Do you think she'll just tell me that stuff?"
"Not all at once and not if she doesn't like you back. But yes, I think over time she will, if you're open with her too."
"Really?" he asked with the first hint of optimism Logan had seen since they started this conversation.
"Yeah, I really do."
"Is that how you got Mars?" Dick asked with a smirk.
"Shit no," Logan said with a chuckle, ending the first kumbaya moment they had shared in years. "I've saved that girl more times than I can count." Though he knew it had more to do with common ground –the loss of their mothers, the loss of Lily, than he was ever going to admit to Dick.
"And then you gave her the look, right?"
"You know it," he said. "Now can we please go surfing?" he asked, getting out of the Land Rover.
"Absolutely," said Dick, taking down his board, " I didn't think you'd ever quit gabbing."
The first time Dick got jealous
It's almost 11pm on a Tuesday. Dick is strolling through the student center at Hearst knowing that Mac will be finished with work in about 10 minutes. The 'I just happened to be walking by at the right time' only worked once, and even then it seemed fishy. Dick didn't live on campus. But now, a few weeks into the semester, she was getting used to, and even looking forward to, having Dick walk her back to her dorm when she got out late. He was perpetually cheerful and his happy presence always seemed to lessen the stress of dealing with imbeciles all day.
There were ground rules, of course, as with anything Dick-related. If she finished up earlier than 10pm, Mac convinced him not to bother meeting her—there were enough people around campus at that time of night that she wouldn't be in any danger. Anything later than 1am and she refused to let him drive across town for a 7 minute walk—she promised to call campus safety or have one of the guys from work walk her back, which, to Dick's dismay (but not to his surprise), they were always willing to do.
Tonight, however, her shift ended in the coveted 10pm to 1am window. Dick was ecstatic, though playing it cool as usual.
"Hey Trev, where's Mackie?" Dick said as reached the IT desk.
Trevor, who unlike Dick did not hide his affection for the purple-haired girl, smiled a mischievous grin. But the tall and robust Trevor could spot a fellow Mackenzie fan a mile away. Dick was on his shit-list from the moment he laid eyes on him. If Trevor couldn't have her, he sure as hell didn't want the rich sufer boy to either.
"She didn't call you? We were slow tonight so we told her to go home early. Mac left about 20 minutes ago."
Dick looked a little worried. Usually she would call him.
"Oh, I wouldn't worry. She met up with some guy she knew. They looked like they were hitting it off," Trevor didn't like this fact anymore than Dick did, but seeing Dick trying unsuccessfully to act like he didn't care cheered him up a bit.
"Short, black dude?" Dick asked hopefully.
"Nope, not the basketball player," Trevor answered with a smile. He had seen Wallace and Mac interact and knew that guy was benign. Fat chance, pretty boy.
"Floppy haired radio guy?"
"Nah, Piz is still on the air," Trevor pointed to the DJ booth across the way. Piz often came to say hi to Mac while he was playing a long set and all the IT guys knew they were just pals.
"Shiny headed Mexican in a janitor's costume?"
"Who wears a janitor's costume, asshole?"
"Trevor, can you quit being a shithead and tell me what the guy looked like? Some of her exes are trouble," Dick embellished a bit. Were trouble, he thought sadly.
"It'll cost you," he said with a smile as he put his feet up on the desk.
"Screw you," Dick said as he walked away. Dick knew this move was going to triple the going rate; if he didn't find her in the next 10 minutes he'd have to come crawling back to Trevor for a description. He figured his bank account could handle paying the fine for finesse points.
"Hey Dick, What're those letters on your keychain?" Trevor called after him. Dick hadn't even gotten his keys out in front of Trevor. With his back turned to the IT desk, Dick pulled out his keys. The only letters he saw were the ones on his fraternity tag.
"Pi Sigma?" Dick asked turning back to Trevor, holding up the keys. He knew he was walking into something, but Mac being out with some guy had him off his game.
"Oh yeah," Trevor said with his feet still propped up and a lazy smile across his lips. "Those were the letters on his shirt."
Dick turned on his heels and stormed out the door. That fucking leech.
Where would they be? Surely Mac wouldn't have taken him back to her dorm. That's what she and Dick did. Sure it was just to play video games or bust on Parker, but he was hoping down the road it could turn into more. No, she wouldn't have taken him there. It's 11 o'clock in the tiniest bubble of a college campus in a tiny town. Where would they go? He could only think of one place in walking distance that was open this late and Dick felt the need to run, so he started there.
Three minutes later he pushed open the door to the campus coffee shop and he saw her. Dick would have relaxed completely after finding Mac, but seeing her cozied up in a booth with the exact fraternity brother he suspected didn't do much to ease his nerves. Jealousy coursed through him. The huge guy's arm was draped behind her shoulders and he could have sworn he was playing with her hair. It looked like she was laughing and enjoying herself.
Mac turned toward Dick when he rocked the hinges off the front door. The whole place did, actually, but Dick was only looking at her.
"Dick!" she sounded happy to see him, "Oh no! Is it 11 already?"
Dick walked toward her booth. Mac looked at her watch, then frowned. She turned to the guy who was blocking her in her seat and said, "I told you someone was going to be waiting on me. You should have let me up."
"I didn't know you were meeting up with Dick," the guy said with a smile as he stood up and let her pass. "How's it goin' buddy?"
"Simon," Dick greeted his friend without warmth.
Mac slid out of the booth and hugged Dick. This surprised him and his shock continued to grow. "I got out of work early."
"Yeah Trevor told me," he said still holding her.
"And I ran into Simon in the student center," she said turning toward Simon but resting her entire back flush against Dick. This was new. Dick couldn't understand why Mac looked relieved to see him and she was staying so close.
"He offered to walk me back to my dorm, but I told him I was meeting someone in about 20 minutes," she said, then added shyly, "I mean, I assumed you were coming like always, Dick."
"So I told her that was just enough time to let me buy her a cup of coffee," Simon said proudly, smiling at both Mac and Dick.
"So how do you two know each other?" Dick asked, though he knew the answer.
"We're in a class together," Mac told him.
"Oh, okay then," Dick said, not wanting to share any more Mackie time, "Let's go Mac. Night Simon," Dick said as he steered Mac towards the door.
"Bye Simon," Mac called over her shoulder a little surprised at Dick's quick departure. Simon was his fraternity brother after all.
"See you tomorrow, Mac," Simon called back.
Once outside, Dick couldn't contain his emotions anymore.
"What was that all about?" he asked her angrily.
"What was what, Dick?" she retorted in shock.
"So you like Simon?"
"No, I don't like Simon. In the thirty seconds you saw us drinking coffee together, how did you surmise that?"
"He was all over you! He had his arm around you and his hand in your hair!"
"He was not all over me!" Mac yelled back.
"Really? You're just going to call me a liar? I just saw him backing you into a corner and you laughing about it," Dick said, not able to stop the image from popping into his mind again.
She shook her head no, her face looked hurt. After a brief silence, she replied next in a whisper, "So what if he was?"
"Are you kidding me with this? So what? Mac, that guy is not right for you."
"Right for me?" she asked ferociously pushing him away from her.
"Yes, right for you. Mac, Simon hooks up with trashy girls on the regular. I know because he tells me, all of us, all about it all the time."
"Oh, and what are you doing when he's telling you about the girls he's with. Surely not bragging about your own conquests! Veronica's told me about the board at your fraternity house. How many points you all get for the different types of girls you sleep with. So how many points would Simon get for me?"
Dick couldn't speak. There were so many things wrong with what she was saying. "Mackie, they don't do that anymore. Not since…all that happened with the girls…you know, Parker and everything. And please don't even talk about Simon like that. He and I are friends, but no way, he's so wrong for you. The thought of him talking about you like he does those other girls, their bodies, what they do….it makes me want to beat the shit out of him right now. Just trust me, he's not right for you."
"Who are you to tell me who's right for me? We're friends Dick, but if we're going to stay that way, you need to realize you have no authority over my life or my choices. If I want someone, anyone, all over me that's none of your damn business."
Dick's face fell. He knew she was right. He had no claim to her. But something about tonight felt wrong. They were silent for a moment, processing and preparing.
"At first…" he started slowly, stumbling, "just then when I first saw you….you seemed…I don't know, relieved or something. Was everything okay before I got there?"
All the anger in her face disappeared in an instant. She shook her head no and bit her lip. "Simon and I have programming together. When I saw him in the student center, I was glad to run into him tonight. Our professor is a tyrant and we all love planning his demise. I was hoping you'd come by to hang out, but I thought it'd be fun to talk about class with him while we walked to get coffee in the mean time. Dick, I really had planned to meet you back at IT right at 11, but Simon wouldn't let me out of the booth."
"He what?"
"I think he thought he was being funny, but I asked him twice already. I probably over reacted, but I don't know, it was a little weird. I think I was laughing because I was nervous. I was actually about to go all Veronica Mars on his ass, but then you plowed through that door at the exact moment I was asking myself what she would do and I couldn't help but smile."
Now Dick couldn't help but smile.
"Don't think we're cool Dick, 'cause we're not!" Mac said, immediately angry again. "You're the one who was just yelling at me because I was sitting by some guy you deemed 'not right' for me! You don't get a say in who I hang out with or what we do, Dick."
"Okay, Mackie," he said walking toward her, "I'm really sorry I yelled at you. I didn't mean to tell you what to do. And I'm sorry Simon made you nervous. Let me get you home."
"No Dick," she told him firmly. "I'm going home alone."
"Don't," she said when he stepped closer to her, an apologetic look on his face. "I need to blow off steam, and maybe that's with a spirited walk through campus or maybe that's beating the hell out of any robbers or rapists I meet along the way. But you're going to leave me alone for the rest of the night, okay? Do not follow me."
Mac thought the look Dick gave her next would rival that of a kicked puppy dog, but she stood firm.
Dick, at a complete loss, said, "So does this mean we're?… I mean, are you?... Mackie, I'm really, really sorry—"
He was so bad at this. "Dick, when you and Logan get into a fight, what happens next?"
"I don't know. We push each other around, we don't talk for a few hours, then go to bed and the next day we go surfing and we're fine. "
"Then I'll see you tomorrow, Dick."
"For surfing?"
Mac laughed briefly, "No, I just mean we'll get back to normal tomorrow. I'll still think I'm right and you'll still think you're right, but that doesn't mean we can't eat lunch together like always. Go home, Dick."
"Be careful, Mackie. Call me when you get in, okay? Please?" Dick said quietly as he watched her walk away. "I'm sorry."
Dick made a fast phone call and then stormed back into the coffee shop. Simon was walking toward the door, so grabbing him by his collar and tugging him out of the building was an easy task for Dick. Dick slammed him against the brick wall.
"Dick! What the hell?"
"You tell me! What the hell were you doing in there?"
"You told me to look out for her! That's what I was doing. She was going to be walking around all alone. I didn't know she was waiting on you."
Dick slammed him into the wall again, this time he hit his head. "Yes, I told you to look out for her. Not to touch her!" Look, don't touch, went through his head again. "Did you or did you not have your arm around her and a hand in her hair? She said she wanted to leave and you wouldn't let her up."
"Listen, I thought you said she used to date your brother. I didn't know you had a thing for her. She's not really my type, but tonight I thought she looked cute."
"Well, stop thinking about her. And the deal's off, by the way," Dick said shoving him one more time and turning away from him.
Simon straightened his clothes as he ran around in front of Dick. "No, no, no, Cassablancas. I haven't been following that tech nerd around for weeks for nothing! You said you'd consider our bid if I kept an eye out for her."
"What bid? You were supposed to get that proposal to me last week. So far, I'm not too impressed with the return on my investment, Simon. And freaking Mac out tonight was the nail in your coffin."
"Dick, I've called you twice when I've seen her walking alone and remember I texted you when she was at that dorm party and her friend left her alone when she went home with some guy. That's gotta' count for something! The guys are finishing up their part of the program. I'll get it to you this week, I promise."
"Do that. But remind your team that the investment phase is over. No more money unless I think you're ready to launch and turn a profit. And stay the hell away from Mac! That part of the deal is over. I'm serious, Simon. If I even hear you were in a group project with her in class, this deal is toast. Touching her again will not only end the deal, but could quite possibly end your life. Do you understand?"
"Dude, you are seriously worked up over this chick."
"Do you understand?" Dick repeated with malice.
"Yeah, yeah, I got you bro. I'll let the guys know they have to have all the kinks out ASAP. I'll see you later this week, okay?"
Without responding, Dick turned and walked away.
Meanwhile, across campus Mac was making her way back to her dorm.
"Well, imagine my surprise seeing you here, Mac," a familiar voice says out of the shadows.
"Did he call you, Wallace?" she sounds frustrated as she stops her frantic pace to talk with him.
"What? No? I was just leaning on this tree here in the middle of the night—"
"In your pajamas?"
"Yep, in my pajamas. And happened to see a friend. Care if I walk you back to your dorm?"
Mac sighs a heavy sigh. "You didn't have to do this for him, you know?"
The light and teasing tone was absent from his voice when Wallace said seriously, "I didn't."
They start walking together, and the teasing voice is back, "But tell me you see that he's crazy about you now. You do, right?"
"It's not like that, Wallace."
"Okay," he agreed cheerfully. "Denial it is."
Their first Halloween party
"Where's your costume, Mac?" Dick asked. The Pi Sig Halloween Bash was in full swing and Mac was happy to have found Dick in the crowd.
Mac didn't want to tell him she chickened out of wearing the mini-dress and go-go boots Parker found for her. A child of the 60's she was not. Her roommate was here somewhere as Cleopatra.
"I decided against wearing one," she told him. "Yours is great though, Ricky Bobby," she said with a smile. "Where in the world did you get a Wonder bread jumpsuit?"
"At a costume shop. Same place I got your costume."
"My costume? What are you talking about?"
"It's upstairs, come see," he said pulling her through the mass of people dressed as nurses and ninjas, angels and cowboys.
"Ahoy Mateys," they heard as they turned around to see Logan and Veronica.
"Nancy Drew?" Mac asked Veronica who was wearing a tight sweater, a headband, a short skirt, and knee-socks.
Veronica nodded in confirmation.
"Nice!" Dick said more to Logan than Veronica. "So you lost the bet, Ronnie?"
"I'm here in a mini-skirt, what do you think, Dick?"
"I think Logan's going to make you pose for pictures all night and I think maybe he'll end up punching someone in the face."
"Shake 'n Bake, I've already done both, thank you," Logan told him proudly with a fist bump.
"Nice eyeliner Logan," Mac told him. "Are the dreads attached to your hat?"
Logan came to the party as Captain Jack Sparrow. He looked like he walked straight off the movie set with his elaborate costume. "Naturally, Mac," he said tipping his hat—hair attached—to her. "Once a Pirate, always a pirate, I guess. So what are you supposed to be?"
"She's supposed to be changing," Dick jumped in, pulling Mac by her elbow again towards the stairs. "We'll be back in a few."
Mac laughed and went along with him. "If you're plan is to get me into a French maid outfit or wear a sexy witch costume, you're out of luck, Dick."
His plan had been for her to come as a go-go dancer, but apparently Parker failed. He knew that one was a long shot anyway.
"I've got two options for you," Dick told Mac as they locked themselves in one of the upstairs rooms. "If you're wanting to go the T-shirt and jeans route, which I can see you're already going for, I've got this."
He held up a black T-shirt with a small silver Apple logo on it.
"So I'd be dressed as a Mac?" she asked him with a laugh. "I get to come as myself?"
"Yes, except you'd also have to wear this," out of the closet he pulled a huge foam cheese hat.
"I'm going downstairs to the Halloween party dressed as a Packer's fan?" she asked teasingly.
"No! You'd be Mac & Cheese!"
"Dick, that's unbelievably lame."
"Fine, you go as Mac and I'll go as Cheese."
"No way, your costume is too good! You can't change out of that jumpsuit."
"Okay, then I've only got one other offer for you." He moved toward the closet and pulled out a costume on a hanger.
Mac actually gasped. Dick was thrilled. "I love it," she breathed.
"Try it on," he said, "I'll be right outside."
He heard her changing inside and yelled through the door. "I'd better see pig-tails when you come out here, Mackenzie!" She chuckled inside the door.
A minute or two later, Mac stepped outside and came face to face with Dick's pleased grin.
She was wearing a white shirt under a blue and white checked dress. The skirt came almost to her knees but was tailored enough to be college-party alluring. She had on girly white socks and ruby red slippers. In one hand was a small basket and a stuffed dog.
"Wow, it looks perfect on you, Mac."
"How did you know I loved this movie?" she asked him.
He motioned for her to come closer. She rolled her eyes, but did as he asked. As usual.
"Don't tell anybody," Dick whispered, "but every once in a while I actually listen to you."
The first time he really made her blush
"Celia Jones. Age 22. Born in Birmingham, Alabama. Parents are divorced."
"You are seriously digging up dirt on Wallace's crush? Tsk, tsk, Veronica. Your BFF would not be pleased," Logan scolded her as he walked into the suite with his floppy blond haired friend in tow. The guys had been playing flag-football and were exhausted and sweaty.
Veronica and Mac were settled on the couches of the Presidential Suite, both with computers in their laps.
"If you two are going to be here all the time, the least you could do is wear the lingerie we set out for you," Dick said with a wink to the girls.
"I'll just interject to say we chose only the most tasteful ensembles for you girls to lounge and scheme in," Logan said kissing Veronica on the head as he passed her.
"We're not staying," Veronica told Logan.
"Who's not? You and me?"
"No, I need to be on steak out tonight. I was planning on taking you as backup, but if you're too tired after your game…"
"Let me get a shower and I'll be ready to go," he told her quickly. He was happy she was being smart tonight. Since Sherriff Mars was back on the job and out of Mars Investigations, Veronica was busier than ever.
"I brought cheese-steaks!" Veronica yelled to Logan who was already in his bathroom.
Logan sprang back into the room, sans shirt. Mac looked away, but Veronica was rethinking her plans for the evening.
"Can I have mine now? I'm starving."
"No way, Jose. I'm starving too, but I need to get set up before my John is going to arrive. I'm holding our dinner hostage so you'll hurry, Logan."
"Okay, but it'll be on you if you need back-up and I'm too famished to defend you."
"I'll take my chances," she said with a smile.
"You always do, " he murmured as he raced off to the shower.
Dick collapsed onto the couch by Mac. "I see there are lots of take out bags here. Did you bring me dinner Mackie?"
"I did actually, and I'll give you yours right now—no waiting—if you get your stinky self away from me and into the shower."
"What did you bring me?" Dick said with a smile.
"A burrito and some chips and salsa."
"I can't eat that in the shower," he said and she made a face at him. "That sounds great Mackie, it does, and I appreciate it. But you know what sounds really good?"
"A cheesesteak?" Mac guessed with a sigh, but she had a happy glint in her eyes.
"Yeah, how'd you know?" Dick said.
"Aw, man!" said Veronica.
"What?" Dick asked her.
"Mac told me to pick up a cheesesteak for you because you'd change your mind when you heard where I was going. I told her I would, but if you didn't ask for it, I was going to eat the sandwich I ordered for you," Veronica told him sadly.
"Give it, Ronnie," Dick said holding out his hand. "Mackie knows me so well!" Veronica forked over the extra sandwich.
"I want his burrito," Veronica told Mac holding out her hand.
"Say it a little louder," Dick said with a cocky grin, "I don't think Logan heard you."
The girls both groaned and yelled for him to go get a shower until he finally left.
"Okay, let's start again," Veronica said, "Celia Jones. Age 22. Born in Birmingham, Alabama. Parents are divorced. She went to high school in Birmingham where her mom lives and her out of the picture dad is in Louisville, Kentucky. Her only sister, Anna, is in residency as an anesthesiologist at UC San Diego. Grandma and Gramps are 09ers from way back, thus her Neptune/Hearst connection, and they apparently live down the street from where the Echolls estate used to stand. What did you find on her web search Mac?"
"Celia Jones, or Ce-Ce or CJ or Jonesy as her facebook friends call her, is, well V, beloved. She's not a starter on the soccer team, even as a senior, but a fan favorite for her hustle. She's on student council, in the pre-med society, and volunteers in an AIDS clinic. Hometown paper has her in soccer scores and for some scholarships. Nothing on her Mom I've found there either. No scandalous online pictures anywhere, just that angelic face with a perfect smile that keeps popping up everywhere. Can the girl just close her eyes or look drunk in one photo, please?"
"Easy Mac," Veronica laughed at her pun, "What else?"
"She's not on twitter, myspace, or a blog, that I have found yet. Every message people post is about how much fun they had with her, how much they miss her, or how they should make plans for this or that. No guys stick out more than the others in the last few months. She may just be Wallace Fennell material, Bond."
"Not so fast. I'm doing her criminal and credit checks now, you go ahead and start Phase 2."
"You know I hate Phase 2, right V?"
"I know Mac, but we'd hate a heartbroken Wallace more."
"Okay, okay. What are you getting Veronica?"
"Nada. No criminal record, not even traffic violations—that's just a sad life, if I do say so myself."
"We're not here to judge, V," Mac says with a smile.
"And, look at that, perfect credit. Several credit cards. No car loan. No student loans. So maybe the grandparents are footing the bill? Let's check with the bursar's office.
"What are you thinking, V?" Mac asked her.
"I'm thinking she's too perfect. Squeaky clean always makes me suspicious."
"Okay, here we go," Mac said, "Phase 2 up and running."
"What's Phase 2?" Dick asked from behind the couch. Both girls were now peering over Mac's computer and gave a start when they heard Dick's voice.
"Um, I'm logged on to her home computer?" Mac said, ashamed.
"What do you mean logged on?" Logan asked, coming out of his bedroom as well.
"She means, she's seeing everything on Celia's home computer. Those pictures, those are hers. She can see what websites she's been to. If she's chatting online with anyone right now. Mac can watch it all."
"You can do that?" Dick asked, astonished looking over their shoulders.
"Yes, and there might be things she doesn't want a guy she goes to school with to see," Veronica said shutting Mac's laptop and looking pointedly at Dick.
"Yeah, 'cause Dick snooping would just be wrong" Logan said icily. "Don't be a hypocrite, Veronica."
"I'll try again later," Mac said, then saw the guys frowning at her, "I mean, if we think Wallace needs it," she amended.
Veronica was not happy with her spoiled snooping. "Did you get anything Q?"
"Nah, just that she's looking at med schools like crazy, with a couple of dalliances of online shopping and watching a lot of Gossip Girl on hulu. I think she's clean, V."
"We'll see," Veronica says warily.
"No more Phase 2 or Phase 3 unless Wallace is desperate, okay?" Mac says sternly.
"Do we even want to know what Phase 3 is?" Logan asked Veronica.
"Reading her email," Mac says quietly.
Both Logan and Dick were appalled.
Knowing that there was something that could appall Logan and Dick made Mac and Veronica realize how low they were sinking.
"We'd better go," Veronica told Logan. "Will you forgive me if I feed you?"
"Sure Sweetie," but then looked at Dick and said, "Keep Mac away from her computer until I can clear my browser history."
Logan and Veronica left for their cheesesteak steak-out and Mac and Dick got settled on the couch and began to eat their dinner.
"Can I ask you something?" Dick asked Mac as he ate his sandwich with chips and salsa.
"Sure, Dick." Mac made a point to never look at Logan or Dick's computers, so any questions he was about to ask, she knew she could answer with a clear conscience.
"When Logan came in here without his shirt on, you looked embarrassed. Why?"
Mac looked astonished. "Wow, okay, that wasn't about computers at all. Give me a minute to recoup here."
"Take your time," Dick offered with a smirk.
Mac looked at him like he was the off-the-wall man-child that he was. "When Logan came out here without a shirt on I looked embarrassed?" she repeated.
"You did," Dick said matter of factly, then took a big bite of cheesesteak. "Why?" he asked with his mouth full.
"I don't know, Dick, I guess Logan's an attractive guy and I looked away so I wouldn't just be staring at his chest. He's my friend and he's dating my best friend. I think it would be weird if they thought I was checking him out, and I would think it was weird if I was checking him out. It's Logan."
"Let's do an experiment," Dick said uncharacteristically.
This amused Mac, "Okay, what do you have in mind, Mr. Wizard?"
"Wallace Fennell, attractive or unattractive?"
"Wallace is cute," concedes Mac, "Definitely attractive."
"You didn't look away when he had his shirt off though," Dick comments.
"When did Wallace have his shirt off?" Mack asked.
"When we were all at the beach."
"Okay, Dick, sure. Months ago when we were all at the beach I had no problem looking at Wallace without his shirt on. What's your point?"
"You said Wallace is attractive, but are you attracted to him?"
"Eh, no way! I prefer to think of Wallace as purely asexual."
"So, my scientific experiment tells me that you are attracted to Logan."
"What? Well, there's a flaw in your math somewhere. Just because I said Logan is attractive and I didn't stare him down when he came in here missing some clothes, doesn't mean I'm attracted to him. Most people would say if I did stare at a half naked guy it was because I was attracted to him."
"Yeah, but that's not really your style, Mac."
"Oh my gosh, Dick. You are infuriating. Maybe I can't prove to you that I'm not attracted to Logan, but I'm just going to ask you to believe me because it's true."
"Oh, I believed you the first time Mackie," Dick was proud of himself for coming up with this little game. "Here's the real question, have you ever been attracted to Logan?"
"Oh," she said, a bit defeated.
"Oh? " Dick prompted, already figuring out the answer to the question before he asked it.
"Well, in the pursuit of science," Mac said rolling her eyes, "I did think he was cute when he first moved here."
"You liked Logan!"
"Dick, I was twelve and Logan was the son of movie-stars. I don't think there was a girl in our middle school who didn't have a crush on him that year. But I honestly haven't liked him since. There? Did that prove your theory—I was embarrassed when Logan came in here tonight because I had a crush on him in sixth grade? Are you satisfied?"
"Nope, I'm not satisfied. Dick Casablancas, attractive or unattractive?"
"You know you're good looking, Dick," Mac said with a frown of disappointment. "If this whole little quiz was to drum up an ego stroke, you could have just started with that one."
"You can stroke anything you want, anytime, Mackie," Dick said licking his bottom lip as a joke.
"Don't be a pig," she said pushing him away from her on the couch.
"But I didn't ask if I thought I was good looking, Mac. I asked if you thought I was attractive or unattractive," Dick said smiling as he regained his upright seat.
"Fine, I'll play along. Attractive."
"And have you ever been attracted to me?" Dick was playing this all off as a light-hearted conversation, but at this moment he realized he'd actually be quite hurt if she said no.
"I'm going to plead the 5th," Mac told him diplomatically.
"The what?"
"The Fifth Amendment, Dick."
"You want to be able to keep guns in your home?" he said, giving her a smile that showed he was teasing.
"You can spout off the Riot Act, no problem? But the Fifth Amendment caught you off guard?"
"Do you know how many times my parents said 'the Riot Act' while reading me just that?"
"Do you know how many times The Fifth Amendment would have come in handy for you?" Mac said, giving him a devilish smile back.
"Ah, yes, let's get back to that. You don't want to answer my question of, let's go back to the record, 'have you ever been attracted to me?' because you are choosing not to incriminate yourself with an answer," Dick gave her his classic pursed lips and nod, " That's a good enough answer for me, Mackie."
"Now, hold up, Dick. Yes, that's one way to think about it. I could be passing on answering to avoid revealing a childhood crush, much like that of our friend Logan's OR I could be passing on answering because I don't want to hurt your feelings because I've never been attracted to you. And let's face it," she said with a smug smile, "we both know you'd be devastated."
Then there's a third option, they both thought. Mac wasn't going to point that out and Dick wasn't ready to call her out.
"So you plead the Fifth, huh?" Dick asked, clarifying. Making sure she wouldn't give him a straight answer. Though he did like that she was flirting with him so openly, for once.
"Final answer," Mac said with a nod.
"Bet if I took my shirt off right now, I'd get a real answer," he said standing up, threatening the action.
Mac swallowed hard, but managed to laugh and choke out, "You probably would," while looking up at him. That was enough of a hopeful answer for Dick.
Dick fell back to the couch, shirt still on, and picked up his sandwich again. He took another huge bite and managed to smile at her with his mouth full.
Mac would have loved to quiz Dick about what he thought about her looks in this moment. It was only fair, she thought, but she was too afraid of the answer. She was certain he'd say she was 'do-able' or 'a nice enough piece of ass.' Either that, or he would hesitate uncomfortably as he tried to come up with a lie that wouldn't hurt her feelings. As intrigued as Mac was, she wasn't ready to have those truths hit her in the face tonight.
Instead, she turned the tables on him. "I can't believe you were so surprised about me having a middle school crush on Logan. It's not like you still don't drool all over Veronica."
"I have never liked Veronica Mars!"
"Bullshit."
"I haven't! She's hot and all, there's no denying that, but no way Mackie! Never!"
When Mac gave Dick a look that told him she thought he was he was full of it, he said, "Think about it, why would I ever like her? When she dated Duncan in high-school she was all sweet and innocent and then when we were all awful to her, she turned into the ball-breaker she is today. I've never been accused of having a type, Mackie, but I definitely don't go for sugar and spice or Satan in a skirt."
"You know, that actually makes sense, Dick. I'm sure Veronica would be relieved to know throughout all the years of ogling, it's been purely platonic."
"Nah, don't tell her. I like to make her nervous," he said, proud of himself, "And If I was going to going to fess up about a high school crush, it would have to be Lily Kane."
"Now that makes a lot of sense," she said picturing the girl loved by most of her friends. " I didn't know her personally, but I know she was fun and flirty and gorgeous."
"You know you're gorgeous, right Mac?"
Mac would have laughed at the line, but the quiet way Dick said this while looking at her earnestly completely threw her off. As evidenced by what she said next, "I'm what?"
Mac cringed. The last thing she wanted to was egg him on or fish for compliments—she couldn't believe minutes ago she was wanting to hear what he thought about her; she was so embarrassed. But Dick didn't need any encouragement. "You're gorgeous. I mean, obviously you've got to know you're hot. You put clothes on that body every day, don't you?" Dick said, as if this was the most evident thing in the world. Mac was looking at him like he was insane.
"But you're, you know,….pretty too," he said looking at her, nodding as though he was pleased he found the right word.
Mac immediately looked down at her lap. She could feel her cheeks burning red.
"Well don't be all embarrassed about it, Mackie," Dick said in quieter voice, closer to her now. "What? Don't tell me those asshats you've dated—my brother included—haven't told you that before. You are. You've got a great smile and beautiful blue eyes…" he trailed off, then he mumbled, "fucking morons."
"No, I mean, yes, I've been told…nice things like that," she couldn't bear to repeat anything, "but it never seems to stick." He looked at her quizzically, but she continued. "What I mean to say is, thanks, Dick. That was really nice of you to say."
Dick, realizing she was feeling awkward, knew the perfect way to change the subject. "Anytime you need your, ahem, ego stroked, you know who to call," he said with a leer.
"Such a filthy pig," she said pushing him away and laughing.