Hope you guys all had a great Christmas! This could be like a belated Boxing Day gift or whatever. Whew, the malls were crowded. Did you all get what you wanted for Christmas?
In Cinder's dreams, she was a nobody. She was never heard. Yes, she yelled and screamed but still never listened to, ignored. She hated the dark times of the nights. One might say she was almost afraid of the dark, but that didn't make any sense. Cinder lived in Luna. It was always night-time. So, no, she did not think they were accurate in saying she was frightened of the dark. In fact, she thought they were downright wrong.
Cinder wasn't afraid of the dark. She was afraid of the creatures that hid in the gray shadows, waiting to pounce, ready to devour. She was afraid of the people who hid behind a mask of civility and friendship only to watch you burn, stab you in the back at the next turn. Stars knew she'd know enough betrayal to last a lifetime. Several lifetimes, actually.
In her dreams, formless black eyes watched her. They gazed at her, boring holes into her until she could take it no longer and look up. Then, she would see... Pupils of black, all black. They sucked in all the light until they were in darkness. She felt his vastness. His control. Because when they were here, there were no boundaries. Nothing to stop him if he attacked. But he never attacked. He enjoyed the command he had over her. The more light the black eyes soaked in, the lighter they became until they turned into a light burnished gold. There was no warmth in them however. They were as cold as her metal limbs. I watch you, the eyes seemed to say. I know you. And you are going to die screaming their mercy. But I'll give you none. You're going to see your friends burn around you and they'll know that you are the sole cause for their suffering. The eyes glimmer maliciously. Then, they'll die cursing you even into their afterlife. And you will follow them. No, Cinder wanted to say. NO. But the darkness always disappears leaving her with the strange sense that she had lost in every possible way. But it was always only a dream after all, so Cinder tried not to think too much upon it.
Sometimes, her dreams brought her so close to the surface, she could almost hear their voices. Especially the loud one, the desperate one. The one with bright copper brown eyes and dark locks that curled near the nape of his neck. He seemed familiar to her somehow, but the more she tried to place him, the more the memory of him drifted away, just past her reach. Cinder wanted to remember. She searched the recesses of her mind for the man's name and found that she could not, for the life of her remember. Hold on, he had said. But what happens when you have nothing to hold on to?
The darkness made everything seem sharper, more focused. She could feel her limbs reaching out, without her permission, groping into the darkness, into nothing. She could feel the man's bitter tears soaking her face, her eyes, stinging them. She could feel the bright flashes of camera and the press of people craning their necks for a mere sight of her. I'm not a circus toy, Cinder wanted to scream. They were too close, too close. She couldn't breathe, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't bre-
She was dragged back under again. A glint of coral red lips and silky auburn hair. A woman. A beautiful woman. Her aunt. Rage and fear swept through her as she glanced down at herself. Cinder was whole again. She gaze at her perfectly formed right hand that was identical to her left. No metal, no cyborg. Flawless, tapered nails and cuticles, just like any other human. Levana circled her like a shark, pearly whites glistening in the dark. "Niece," her aunt whispered. "Join me!" Cinder recoiled and backed up. Levana was dead. She was supposed to be dead. She was supposed to be dea-. Cinder knocked into a playpen.
Levana stretched her lips into a thin smile and waved a hand. The darkness receded back into a room, a nursery. No, not this again. No. A wallpaper of grinning moons and stars. A rocking chair.
"Why are you showing me this?" Cinder whispered, fighting back a whimper. There was no spark of memory. She had dreamed this enough, but Cinder could never tell if it was a figment of her hallucinations or rather it was a former experience, a memory. Levana drifted closer, trapping her like an animal. Cinder shut her eyes, silently refusing to acknowledge her. The barest brush of skin on skin. She shuddered. Levana's skin was papery and dry, like an old tome.
"You don't remember?" Levana asked in a lilting voice, a blunt edge of malice warping her tone. Cinder could feel her aunt curling around her, suffocating, pressing, trapping her in. She covered her ears and shook her head violently.
"No! No, I don't remember," she said firmly, but there was a shard of despair to it. "NO!"
"No as in you don't remember, or no, as in you don't want to remember?" Levana challenged softly, ever the devil's advocate. Her aunt's mellow voice purred in her ears. Cinder took deep panting breaths. "Let's see." Against her will, Cinder opened her eyes. The walls closed in. The stench of charred flesh and ash permeated the air. Blackened holes in the plaster glared at Cinder. The moons and stars shrivelled up and curled at the edges. Their smiles frowned at them. Levana was playing her. Cinder was burning. She felt for her forehead. Too hot. What did Wolf tell her about her panic attacks? Deep breaths.
"Why are you showing me this?" Cinder cried. She felt an edge of hysteria touch her voice. "It's not real. It's not re-" Levana burst into flame. Cinder screamed, then clamped a hand over her mouth to choke it down. She stopped, and raise her hand back into her field of vision. It wasn't flesh. It wasn't even metal. Her hand was nothing but a stub of mangled burnt flesh. Another rising cry choked in her throat. The skin was blackened and puckered. Blood and pus oozed out and Cinder gagged. Was it possible to be so disgusted at yourself that the mere sight of your body made you want to throw your guts up? "No!" Pain lanced up her arm, her leg. Cinder fell. She attempted to yell, to scream, but nothing came out. The heat was everywhere. The pain was everything. A shadow passed by her right. Cinder tried to lift her head to see, but the pain got to be too much and she dropped her head. Levana crouched and leaned in, baring her ruined face to Cinder.
"You might not see now, but you'll see soon. I'm not the worst of them, niece." Cinder opened her mouth to reply, but instead, gasped in a breath. The darkness cleared and she surfaced. Cinder could hear voices above her, bright lights shining behind her closed lids. Try as she might, Cinder couldn't get them to open. Cool metal gripped her throat forcing her mouth open.
"Med-droid," came a disembodied voice, "insert bronchoscope." Dr. Erland? Rough plastic tubes were shoved into her mouth. Cinder gagged. No! She struggled vainly. "Med-droid, give Her Majesty another shot of anesthetic please." She was held down. No, please! A small prick, then nothing.
She was burning, burning, burning. The flames licked up her calves. No! Cinder jerked awake panting. Water, water, she needed water. It hurt. It hurt everywhere. Fire, burning. No! She tried to smother them. "Cinder. Cinder! What are you doing?" The voice was familiar. Cinder ignored the man. She was burning! A warm body held her down. Cinder floundered blindly, the exertion making her cough. "Cinder! You are going to hurt yourself," the man said fearfully. Cinder froze. He gently set her down. How did he know her name? "You're at the hospital right now, Queen Selene," the man said clearing his throat. "You were trapped in a fire, but you are okay now. Dr. Erland flew in to help you." Cinder narrowed her eyes. Who was his guy? Who did he think he was?
"Don't touch me," she hissed in a hoarse voice. How dare he touch her? Where was Ginger? Her friends? The man let go of her as if she was a large burning piece of coal. His eyes showed his confusion.
"Cinder?"
"How dare you address me by that name," she snarled. "Who are you?" The man bowed to hide his face. But he was a bad liar, and Cinder could see his shock, his anguish, his grief.
"I'm sorry," he said after a while. "I must seem terribly rude. I am Emperor Kaito of the Eastern Commonwealth." Cinder knew him. She knew she knew him, but... Cinder screwed up her face and concentrated. She could just barely remember. A wisp of memory. A market day six years ago, before Levana, before she was crowned queen. The smell of Chang Sasha's steamed buns and sweets rolls. A mechanic and a crown prince. Her rapidly beating heart and his blatant confidence. His smile. Then, fast forwarding to her coronation. The smile on his face fading as she told him, explained why she needed to stay, needed to guide her people. Kai giving her the same blankly polite expression he used when talking to another politician, another bobble head. How she had asked to stay friends, knowing it would break his heart.
"Your Majesty," Kai said blandly. "I was sent to see how you were doing? It's wonderful that you're awake. The world will be so relieved. Would you like me to inform Thaumaturge Cress of your condition?" Cinder ducked her head, ignoring him, scanning through the memories she had of the past week. She hadn't lost any. The Blackcrest fiasco and... They were going to New Beijing on vacation? Oh, yes. Thorne had booked a suite at the Rising Blossom. She frowned again. What had happened next? Had they met up with Kai? Cinder looked up at him. Why were they at the palace? "Your Majesty?" Kai asked again. He attempted a smile, but it looked raw and uncertain. Kai turned away. "I'll tell your attendants to come down."
Cinder watched him. It was now or never. She took a deep breath and caught at his hand. Kai stood stiffly, suspended by her simple move. He turned back, but didn't meet her gaze. "Do you need anything, Your Majesty? It is our goal to make you as comfortable as possible during your stay in the Eastern Commonwealth." Cinder sucked in a breath at his formal language, and tugged weakly. Kai glanced at her quickly and looked straight again, at the wall behind her. "If there's noth-" Cinder rose, kneeling on the infirmary bed. She swayed slightly and Kai's eyes widened. His arms automatically went around her waist to support her. "You should-" Cinder's hands brushed Kai's hair and he shut up.
"Kai," she breathed. He stopped breathing.
"Y-you remember me?" Kai's hand tightened on her waist as if to make sure she was here, not a dream. Cinder stilled.
"I haven't remembered everything," she said at last. "I can't recall what happened after I visited Pearl." Kai didn't move.
"You don't remember what happened at the restaurant," he said carefully. Kai let go of her, easing Cinder back into the pillows. He was blank, closed off. Cinder furrowed her brow. What had she said wrong? He removed his hand from her grip. Cinder let him go. She blinked at him. Kai dragged a hand through his hair. "I-I have to go." Cinder nodded, and looked away. Kai stumbled to the door, and with one last glance toward her, left.
Ginger rushed in and pounced on her lap. "Aunty!" she squealed happily. Scarlet walked in and scolded Ginger gently.
"Your aunt is resting. Get off of Cinder." Ginger complied with a little fuss. Cinder coughed as if on cue. "Why did His Majesty run out of here in such a rush?" Scarlet asked. "Scared?" Cinder smiled half wanting to laugh and half wanting to wince.
"Did you threaten him?"
"Of course we did," Cress huffed, sauntering in. "He almost got you killed!" Thorne laughed.
"Sexy, Cinder. Very sexy. What happened to your voice?" Cinder grimaced. She knew exactly what Thorne was talking about. All that smoke had roughened her throat, so she spoke in a permanent low, husky tone. Cinder knew it was bad when she sounded just as bad.
"I know," she said trying to speak normally, but failing miserably. Thorne smirked. Wolfe glared at her from across the room.
"You know," he started furiously, "the only reason why I let you go with His Majesty was because I trusted you. And you almost got killed!" Cinder frowned and traced the edges of her blankets.
"I don't remember," she said plainly. Wolfe opened his mouth to argue, but stopped.
"What?"
Cinder shook her head. "I don't remember anything after I visited Pearl." Cress stilled.
"How can you not remember?" Cinder shrugged.
"It's a blank. I just don't have any memories. It's like I went to sleep and just woke up. I don't know what happened. What did happen? I can't access the net right now. My head hurts." She clutched her head forlornly. Ginger hugged her gently, her short legs swinging from where she perched on the edge of Cinder's bed.
"It's okay, Aunty. I'll show you." Ginger slipped out her portscreen from where she attached it to her boots. She tapped the screen nimbly and pulled up a recent net search. The title: The Fiery First Sighting of the Ghost Queen in Three Years.
Cinder winced. They had recorded the scene at the fire. Crowds were being forced back from an ambulance hover where Cinder could see a white and red sheet covering a slight body. Probably her. Flames licked up the restaurant as the pretty, well-groomed anchor spoke, voice excited.
"...at the first sighting of the Luna Queen, Her Majesty Selene since her last appearance three years ago in the American Republic during President Vargas's Treaty Gala." The anchor gripped her microphone breathlessly, chest heaving. She looked like she was having a seizure. Cinder snorted, and Ginger shot her a weird look. Cinder missed the next comment, but she tuned in again. "...fire at one of the most well-known Japanese restaurants in New Beijing, Takazumi's. After six years of self imposed seclusion in the capital city of Luna, Artemisia, the young queen is finally back in action," she winked at the camera, "and already hard at work seducing the most eligible bachelor in the Eastern Commonwealth, our own emperor." Thorne groaned as Cinder sighed.
"Why am I always either trying to kill him, or seduce him? It's getting to be a pattern."
"Not this again." Scarlet shot the captain a look to shush him.
The anchor continued, "Witnesses report, Queen Selene, her goddaughter, Ginger; the daughter of the Ambassador Scarlet Benoit, and Emperor Kaito enter Takazumi's together. The two respective rulers looked very cozy indeed." Cress and Scarlet both raised their eyebrows simultaneously, and Cinder shook her head, focusing on the screen.
"Their Majesties were caught in the fire, and while Emperor Kaito and lady Ginger got out, Queen Selene was trapped in the burning restaurant, unconscious. In the name of their long friendship, His Majesty went back in to save her. Paramedics found them soon after. Queen Selene is suffering from severe smoke inhalation and a mild concussion. She was transported to the royal infirmary. No other information was given about her condition, but we were led to believe that her injuries are critical. The restaurant owners, Tosco and Sasha Yuma claim that no other patrons were injured badly and that Takazumi's will reopen soon. The police are currently finding as much information as they can about the fire but the head chief claims that there might have been foul play involved since the fire started in a storage room as opposed to a kitchen fire. There will be more news as we update..." Cinder tuned the rest of it out.
"I still don't really remember..." she trailed off as Thorne shook his head at her and whistled.
"Dang, girl. You live a busy, busy life."
At least Cinder didn't have full amnesia. The actual type is called Post-Traumatic Amnesia. Thank goodness for Wikipedia. I had to search up most of the medical terms and stuff. Technically I didn't really know what I was talking about with all those equipment and stuff. I hope it sounded real to you guys. I was kinda winging it. And as usual, reviews pretty please!
-Silverleaf